This story came to me out of no where...but I thought what the heck maybe somebody will enjoy reading it This story will be angsty...and mostly will revolve around the relationship between Haley and her family and of course Naley. I would really appreciate any feedback you have to let me know if I should continue with this story or not. Thanks and enjoy!
Chapter 1
Haley James stared up at the abandoned brick house, her eyes growing in mock fascination to the utter perfect-ness that surrounded the home. The grass was green, the yard was cut, and the flowers seemed to be placed in such an order, that she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Everything seemed untouched, unharmed.
And yet here she stood in front of it so tainted.
"Haley bear, don't just stand there, we have boxes to unload let's go!"
Her mother's perky voice filled Haley's sulky demeanor and as her footsteps came closer she wanted nothing more then to jump in the moving truck and drive back to their home in Seattle, back to where her life was.
Her mother's hand came up and touched Haley's shoulder; she visibly flinched from the contact. Haley's eyes met her mother's to see the pain that now evoked them from her simple gesture. It scared Haley to know how quickly she could cause so much destruction in one person.
"Everything's going to be okay now Haley."
Haley's eyes remained locked with her mother's but yet aside from her obvious discomfort from her mother's physical contact she had not shown any sign of emotion.
She hadn't shown any sign of living.
Her mother let out a tired sigh before dragging a frustrated hand through her shoulder length blonde hair.
"I'm going to make this better for us Hales."
Haley's eyes finally left her mother's and now her head hung low, and her hands stuffed in her jean pockets. Lydia then proceeded to tip Haley's chin up with her fingers as she tried her best to give Haley a reassuring smile.
"Just don't shut me out Haley bear."
Haley pulled her bottom lip in between her teeth and let her doe brown eyes connect with her mother's hazel ones.
"That's all I'm going to ask of you Haley, please don't shut me out."
She shivered as the contact from her mother's fingers left her chin, and the once radiated hope her mother had tried to transfer into her daughter had faltered, and made no progress at digging away at the wall that gated Haley's heart.
Haley stood there, still without moving but yet letting her eyes roam over the house. There were vines running down the ancient red bricks, a chimney that peaked over the roof, and a birds nest resting in the gutters just above the white balcony, that she presumed would be apart of her new room.
This whole thing started when she came home after basketball practice to find her living room in boxes, as she continued to walk through her house she realized that everything seemed much bigger now that the paintings, and family statues were all packed away.
As she made her way up the stairs and down the hall she knew this would be the ultimate decider to if her mother had really stuck to her word and came to the conclusion that it was time for them to finally run.
She entered the office to see all the books were packed away, but his desk, his chestnut brown, wooden desk, had yet to be touched, and that's when she knew they were leaving.
Her mother had always blamed her father's work for his departure.
Haley knew if the desk was untouched then they actually would be departing from her only home, because why would her mother pack away and keep the things she viewed as their family's main problem. Haley however knew her mother was just looking for an excuse, a reason or thing to blame for their tragedy.
Haley just viewed his work as his escape, when everything else was falling apart he always busied himself in paper work amongst paper work, but he never once complained or made a fuss about his lack of time with his children and that's what pained Haley the most to realize.
His work wasn't an escape from the craziness that his life entailed; his work was an escape from their family, most of all from her.
"It's not your fault Little H."
Haley's eyes snapped onto her twin brother's form as Jake took her cold hand in his own and gave it a tight squeeze. He had never felt it feel so cold, so lifeless. His little sister, of 10 minutes, was once so carefree and easy going, and now everything she once was is shattered, and he's left standing in her presence trying to pick up the pieces to her broken soul.
"Do you think he would have liked it here Jake?"
Jake's eyes connected to his sister's and felt the air knock out of his body as he took her in. She looked so fragile in this moment. So close to reaching her breaking point but yet so far from where she needed to be, and he knew she would never let him help her, she would never let him see her fully collapse into pain, and oh how he wished she would. How he prayed she would just let everything out and finally just let go of their haunting past. How he would give anything just to see her cry, how he would trade his place in their messy betrayal for hers in a heartbeat. Jake dreamed of nothing more then to see his baby sister's eyes light up again and sparkle with glee as they once did. His heart chipped off another piece as he answered his sister.
"No."
He wouldn't lie to her and give her a reason to hate him. Jake knew what times to pick his little white lies to tell his sister, and this was certainty not one of them. Not when she brought the subject of their father into the question.
There was enough lies lying underneath the surface about their father for another to be added.
"I think that's why she choose it Little H."
Haley's eyes fell from Jake's and his only reaction was a small sigh leaving his defeated body.
"It's why she loves it."
Their mother, Lydia, grew up in Tree Hill. Her best friend was Karen Scott. Haley and Jake both had vivid memories of their mother sitting at the edge of their beds and telling them outrageous stories of her childhood in the small town. They both remembered how her eyes would light up when she would remember something knew, and how her voice would pick up a little excitement when she was retelling an old joke.
It's the only time they saw their mother truly happy.
Every other time was just another lie.
Something Jake and Haley had become accustomed to in their lives.
"I don't know if I should want this Jake."
His eyes brimmed with tears as he watched Haley suck in a much-needed breath. He could tell she was nervous, hell her arm was twitching at an unbearable rate, but he knew if he were to reach out she would just shy away, and that wall he had worked so hard to chip away at to the point it was now would quickly reappear and shut him out for good.
"Want what Hales?"
She closed her eyes, trying to tell her self to open up. Pleading to finally let her brother back in and just fall into his awaiting arms. She needed him, almost as much as she needed air, without Jake, she would simply not be living; she wouldn't have the strength to.
"A chance to start over."
His hand brushed over her cheek and a small glimmer of hope sparked his heart as he watched her face lean into his touch.
"You deserve this Hales."
Her face-hardened as she shook her head and broke away from his contact, and just like that the glimmer of hope in her brother's heart was once again gone.
"He deserves this Jake, not me. I shouldn't even be here, he should."
He watched as his sister stood there finally allowing her eyes to brim with tears and then watched as she just as quickly sucked them back down.
"You couldn't save him Haley."
She pulled her lip between her teeth before finally moving her feet around her brother.
"I could have stopped him though."
Her voice was a pained whisper, and it shook him to his core.
Jake turned around and grabbed Haley's shoulders and gave them a hard shake.
"How many times do I have to tell you that it wasn't your fault Haley!"
Her eyes felt like knifes were beating into him, and it took every ounce of strength he had not to look away.
"Until it's true."
Jake's eyes closed and his hands dropped from her shoulders as the pain of the past year came rushing back to him. He opened his eyes to see Haley standing in front of him with the same thoughts running a million miles through her head.
"You didn't pull the trigger Hales."
Her head turned as she licked her upper lip and her face constructed into agony.
"You're right I didn't." Her eyes snapped back to Jake's and he could feel her wall rebuilding brick by brick.
"It still doesn't change the fact that I killed him Jake."
Jake could feel the distance growing between them and yet he was only standing a few mere inches from her.
"I might not have pulled the trigger but I didn't stop it either."
Her eyes flashed up to Jake's and he knew the trust she once had in him was now vanishing, and she was just going to go back to her destruction mode. The mode where she had spent so many months just locked up in her room, with no contact to the outside world.
"I watched our brother die Jake."
Her voice remained a whisper and he wanted nothing more then to just reach out and save her, bring her back to him.
"I may not be the murder, but I am the reason it happened."
Haley could feel her mouth becoming dry and her mind beginning to feel. She didn't want to feel. She just wanted it all to go away, impossible she knows, but yet still she prays for it.
"It equals out to be the same if you ask me."
Her eyes focused in on his hazel greens before turning around and heading into their "new life" as her mother had so forcefully explained. There were so many things she wanted to keep hidden from the world, so many things she knew would destroy her and anyone she came into contact with if they found out.
Yet there were so many unspoken things that Haley had yet to be informed of, so many poisonous answers that would break her family even more.
Haley woke up the next morning to the sound of her mother screaming in her ear to get ready. She got up from her queen size bed, looked around her spacious, but seemingly empty bedroom and let out a long sigh. She knew everything would be different here, everything would change, and a part of her wanted it.
But another part was screaming at her to go back.
She slowly got up from her bed, jumped into the shower, and then proceeded to do her makeup, blow-dry and curl her hair, and then finally got dressed in her tan shorts, light blue polo, and slipped on her white flip flops.
She stared at the tiffany's jewelry sitting on her dresser and she titled her head to the side deciphering if she was ready to wear those things again.
The diamonds and pearls were her Christmas gifts.
From her big brother and father.
Both missing from their new home.
She decided against it and then grabbed her white messenger bag and headed down the stairs. She was halfway to the door when her eyes landed on a picture in the mantelpiece. It was taken two summers ago. Jake and Haley were sitting in the front with their older brother residing in the middle of the two. Next were her parents in the back of them with each of their arms resting on each other's shoulders. There were smiles planted from ear to ear and to any passer buyer who glanced at this picture they would seem like the perfect family.
It's strange how well her family became at pretending.
Jake was making his way down the steps when he noticed his sister's stilled form. He sucked in a huge gasp of air when he realized the picture she was indeed so transfixed on.
"You ready to start our junior year Hales."
Haley's form remained unmoving. Jake let out a small sigh before finishing his way down the steps and moving over to stand by his sister.
"We better get going Hales."
Her eyes had yet to move from one particular spot, and Jake knew actually where she was staring. She always became this way whenever a stranger or a friend mentioned him, and when she saw a picture with his smile lit up for the world to see he knew she was thinking of that particular day.
The day when the James family was turned upside down.
"Hales?"
Her eyes finally snapped from the picture and landed on Jake. Her face constructed into a fake smile as she nodded her head and then walked in front of him to the door. She still thinks it fools him, the fake smile she puts forth, but she forgets that he knows her better then anyone else in this world.
She forgets that he's the one who taught her that smile.
Jake followed suit after his sister and jumped in his new black escalade. Their mother had given the car to Jake as a gift, and Haley's cherry red bmw still stood in the driveway untouched. She had always hated to drive.
Jake peeled out of the driveway and made his way towards Tree Hill High.
God he hoped she would be okay.
How he prayed she would meet someone that would open her up again.
"So I'll meet you here after school."
It was the first words she had spoken to him all morning. She was still trying to look brave, strong even, but he could see that inside she was slowly dying. Everyday things got just a little bit harder and while she tried to play it off and look like everything was fine Jake could see she was just trying to hide.
Sooner or latter he knew it was all going to catch up with her, and that's what scared him the most about his baby sister. The fact that some day everything would be looking her straight in the face and her brace act wouldn't work this time.
He gave her a small smile and nodded his head as he watched her make her way up the concrete steps. She never looked back to see if he was still standing there.
It hurt Jake to know that she didn't want to walk in with him.
Haley opened the doors to see a great deal of teenagers running around the halls and hugging people who they hadn't seen all summer and she almost had to laugh at the hypocrisy of it all. If these people they were hugging were really that important to them they wouldn't have spent an entire summer not picking up the phone and giving them a call.
She reached what she presumed to be her locker and began twisting the lock over and over. She felt her cheeks get flushed as she tried her lock once again and yet it still remained closed shut. She let out a grunt of frustration and flung her messenger bag on the ground.
"Need some help?"
She turned to see a tall, blue eyed, black haired guy standing in front of her with a small smirk planted on his lips at the sight of Haley twisting and pulling the lock but yet still the lock remained stuck. She whipped a piece of her hair off the front of her face and gave the stranger a sheepish smile.
"Sure."
He let out a light chuckle as he took the piece of paper from her that contained her locker combination and then began twisting.
There was an awkward silence betweem the two and Haley finally opened her mouth to speak to the mystery person as he remained focused on his task.
"I swear I tried a million times to open that thing, and it just wouldn't budge."
"I know I was watching."
Her eyebrows rose and then knitted together as she thought about his words. He popped the lock off and her locker swung open. He turned to her with a triumphant grin before the smile fell and he realized just how wrong his statement might have sounded.
"Oh god I didn't mean it like I was watching you like stalker like or anything, it was just you were making so much noise, and getting all flustered, that I couldn't help but watch."
She nodded her head and let her eyes roam over him as she took in his appearance. Dark blue jeans, not too baggy, but yet just right, a blue polo with white sneakers, and a simple band around his arm.
"Do you always make it that obvious when you check guys out?"
A small blush crept to her cheeks and she wanted to smack herself for seeming so forward. She has never been the type of girl to throw herself at guys, or flirt with whomever just to get attention, but this guy seemed different. It was almost as if he was challenging her.
"Do you always stalk girls from across the hall?"
His eyebrows rose in surprise to Haley's comment, and she knew she caught him off guard with her statement.
"Hey I told you I wasn't stalking, I was just watching."
"For how long?"
"I don't know, I guess when you first started having problems opening it."
"So about 10 minutes then."
"Sure I guess."
"Well that qualifies you as a stalker then, would you like to hear your prize."
He let out a small chuckle and Haley stood there with a smile beginning to cross her lips.
"Sure Vana why don't you tell me."
Haley took out the piece of paper that had all her classes on it and held it up like she was showcasing it to him.
"You've just won a trip to show the new girl where her first period is."
He shook his head at her silliness and found his eyes locking onto her light brown ones. All though a smile was firmly planted on her lips he couldn't help but notice that something was off about her features.
Her smile didn't reach her eyes.
"Sounds amazing."
"Oh it is trust me. Some people might kill to win what you just did."
"I bet."
She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and shuffled her feet a bit as they both just stood there looking at each other. He found her so beautiful and so unique and she found him to be attractive and an escape from her disastrous life. His eyes finally snapped out of his trance and he held his arm out for her to link her own through.
"Well I better get my prize to class before she's late."
She put her arm through his and gave him an appreciative smile.
"Yeah I'm sure that wouldn't look to good if I was late on my first day."
"Don't worry about it, just tell them you were with me."
Her eyes got a little bigger and they rose in curiosity. Before she could question him on it he stopped in front of a classroom.
"And who do I say you are by the way?"
She gave him a shy smile once she realized she had no clue what this guy's name was.
"Nathan Scott."
She nodded her head before unlinking her arm from his.
"Well Nathan Scott thanks for brining me to my first class."
"No problem…"
He stopped once he too realized he had no idea what her name was.
"Haley James."
He nodded his head while rethinking her name over and over in his mind.
"I'll see you latter Nathan."
She held her hand up in the bye signal and watched as a smirk planted onto his full pink lips.
"You can count on it Ms. James."
She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and shook her head at how weird her day was starting out. She walked into the room to see Jake sitting in the back row watching her in curiosity and amusement. Everything suddenly came flooding back to her and she realized just what a mistake meeting Nathan could have been. She couldn't bring him into her world when she knows everything that has happened to the people that have touched her life. She wouldn't break another human being just because she was lonely.
And he was the first person to ever help her forget.
To ever make her feel normal.
The smile that was on her face immediately dropped and she made her way through the rows to the seat Jake had saved for her.
"Who was that?"
She sat down and looked at her brother who now had a smile etched on his features.
"Nobody."
She turned her body away from his and looked up at the teacher who began to take roll. In most cases Jake would have taken this as his cue to shut up about the said person she was with, but after school he knew he was going to question her about the mystery guy again.
Because for the first time in a year he saw his sister's beautiful smile radiate as she talked to this guy.
And the light in her eyes was starting to spark up again.
-Sarah