Warm water surrounded her as she swum in a lake not far from the hometree. The lake was deep and was a dull, almost see-through green that at night would light up in the most beautiful of neon. She had needed an escape after living through some of Tsu'tey's worst memories, and to think that the parts she saw was just fragments of the story, and the feelings she felt mere whispers compared to the screaming of his.

Her lungs were screaming for air but she wasn't ready to break the surface. She was addicted to the feeling of control she had under the water, she controlled every move and ripple in the lake. Lately she had been feeling a loss of control. She had just started getting some of her control back, and had after a long time of fighting she had earned the respect and her place among the Na'vi, but now she felt like it was all spiralling out of control.

Awa took one last stroke before she swam for the surface. Her eyes were wide-open and had adjusted quickly to the slight murkiness in the water and slight sting that came with it. She had always been a swimmer, and when she needed to think she went swimming. Awa found it particularly calming when she got to peacefully swim with different creatures like fish or other kinds of creatures on Pandora that resided in water. Once or twice she had ran into a predator and had to get out of the water but most of the time it went without a hitch and she came out relaxed and in a good mood.

She gasped loudly when she finally broke the surface and greedily inhaled air. The woman giggled and pushed herself around in a circle, making small ripples in the water around her and scaring off any of the nearby fishes. Awa stills and forces herself to breathe slower. She saw two blue blops crawling just inside of the forest line, one of them being Jake and the other Neytiri.

They both had bows strapped to their backs, Neytiri's was made from wood from the hometree and decorated the way she wanted, while Jake's was plain and worn from all the years it had been used. Awa watched in silence as the pair crawled forward after their prey and she saw how in synch they were. She flinched from the sudden pain that she felt in her heart as she stared at them, at how the sight reminded her of him. Had it really been that long since he died? It felt like yesterday to her and the burden of his death wasn't getting any easier, especially since she watched Jake's relationship with Neytiri grow. He would have been happy for them, Awa thought, he would have wanted her to move on. If only it hadn't been with Jake, who she still hadn't forgiven for spying on her.

Awa started swimming to the rocky beach and as soon as she had her feet firmly placed on dry soil again she raised her arms high above her head and then let them flop loudly against her wet sides. That would for sure have scared away any nearby prey for the lurking duo, she thought smugly and begun her journey back to the hometree.

"Have you already ran out of them? It's been two days, Tsu" Awa sighed and then laughed with her head tilted back. "I pity the chefs. They work hard to build up a stock of the seeds and then two days later you've eaten them all. It reminds me of how fast my aunt used to eat a few small nuts, earth ones. We used to buy the biggest bag of them and when my mom brought it out the same night they were all gone"

Tsu'tey glanced up at his mate with a sheepish smile on his face before picking up the last episoth seed from his leaf. He stared at it and then at her, and then back down at the seed. "They're my favorite" He almost whined and threw the seed into his mouth before Awa could yank it out of his hand. "And I was the one who went through the trouble of getting them, so it's only fair that I'm the one who gets to eat them."

Awa stared at him, opening her mouth and then snapping it close. "Excuse you. I helped you bring those seeds. You're in one of those moods today."The woman commented with a pointed look as she stared at her mate's petulant face.

"What mood"

"The one where you act like a baby"

Tsu'tey glared at his mate and threw the slimy shell of the last episoth seed at her face in retaliation. The shell left a slime trail on her face that she refused to wipe off just to spite her mate, who in her opinion, was just proving her point of being a baby. It had taken a long time until she had seen this side of Tsu'tey, a lot of pain and a lot of challenges. This was the vulnerable side of him that he only showed the ones he trusted.

The warrior sputtered indignantly for a response but couldn't think of anything that topped the shell he had just thrown. The sight made him smile smugly and he winked at her when she still hadn't shot back a response.

"That just proved my point" Awa calmly told him as she dragged a hand through the slime on her face before leaning over and squeezing just above his knee with the very same hand she used for the slime. "Maybe I need to sign you up for some of the activities for the babies. I think you'd like hide an-"

"If you do that I swear to Eywa that I will sign you up as JakeSully's teacher" Tsu'tey threatened her with an underlying tone of humour to his voice. "I think we both know who got the better part of the deal"

Awa grumbled under her breath and admitted defeat after pushing herself to cuddle into his side. "Whatever. You're still a baby" She deliberately said the last word in english, for two entirely different reasons.

"Yes, that is what you call me sometimes when we-" He nodded as-a-matter-of-facts as he draped his arm over her shoulders and then brought her closer to him when he felt her cringe in shock.

"Shush" She barked at him and pushed a finger against his lips before he could finish his sentence. Awa whined in embarrassment when several Na'vi walked past them, shooting them curious looks. Her ears flattened against her head and she blushed a vivid purple. Tsu'tey's whole body shook as he laughed at her. "It's not funny!"

He tried to suppress his laughter, making small choked sounds leave him ever so often. He felt a little bad for doing it since he knew how much of a private person she was, and how she was even less for PDA than he was, but it was an opportunity too good to pass up. Tsu'tey looked down on her and saw the pout on her lips.

"Are you pouting?" He asked her with an amused smile on his lips. "Who's the one acting like a baby now. What was it you were saying earlier? Hmm, that's right. Would you like me enroll you in the activities for the children? I think hide and seek is your forte"

Awa hissed softly at him and nuzzled herself closer to his body, not at all appreciating him turning the tables on her. "If you're not careful I'll kick you out of the hammock. Maybe a few nights sleeping in a tree will teach you some respect"

"You're about as intimidating as baby kenten. Can you give me that seed?" Tsu'tey excitedly asked her when he spotted a forgotten pxorna seed laying under the edge of his food leaf.

"No" She muttered and closed her eyes. "I'm a baby, remember? Get your own seed"

"As leader of the warriors and hunters I command you to get that seed for me"

"As leader of nothing I command myself to not obey your order" She smiled up at him cheekily and placed her hand on his abdomen. When she saw that his attention had shifted from the last episoth seed she gently pushed it away with her foot, making sure to keep Tsu'tey's attention on her warm touch.

He snorted. "Don't think I didn't see that, Awa"

"Saw what?"

"That"

"What?"

"You know what"

"I really don't"

"Yes you do"

"Nuhuh. I have no idea what you're talking about"

"Yes you do"

"I honestly don't"

"Awa..."

"Tsu'tey..."

Tsu'tey stared at her and pointed to where she had kicked the seed. "That" He shot back and tickled her side until she was laughing and begging him to stop. There had only ever been three people that knew how to tickle her; her mom, grand father, and Tsu'tey.

Awa shuffled out of his hold and leaned forward to grab the abandoned seed by her feet and with a sigh rested against him again. "This?" She asked him with a teasing smile on her lips. He nodded eagerly and held his hand out for said seed. "You couldn't have meant this seed. Finders keepers" Awa told him before bringing the seed slowly to her mouth only to throw it in when he lunged for it.

He whined and unwrapped his tail from hers. "What does 'finders keepers' mean?" The english phrase sounded awkward and stiff on his tongue and he shuddered in disgust afterwards. "You and your sayings. I will never understand them"

She hummed while eating her stolen seed. "It means that the one who finds it can keep it."

The rest of their small lunch went about the same; with them talking, eating and laughing. It was maybe 20 minutes later that the pair had stood up and made their way up to where the clan kept their ikran. The mated pair had decided to get some more pxorna seeds and bring them to the chefs of the clan so they could prepare them and keep them safe until meal times. Tsu'tey wasn't the only Na'vi in the clan that was obsessed with the slimy seeds, and often had to compete with the others to get as many as he could before they ran out of them. As a result the chefs had decided that the members that wanted and ate all the seeds should also contribute and bring some, making it more fair to the ones who enjoy them but not to the same degree as Tsu'tey and the others.

Awa stroked a tender hand down the leathery wing of Lilo and cooed sweet words to her. Lilo represented a lot of things in her life. She was a living reminder of her greatest pride in life, and living proof that she had earned her place amongst the Na'vi. The Na'vi woman scratched the bird-like creature on its beak before connecting their tswins and initiating tsaheylu, something that had become so natural for the pair in a short time. Humans used to wonder what it was like to fly, but Awa knew what it felt like. Flying for her was freedom, just like everything else on Pandora (Excluding the human factors), and she had dreamt several times of her family flying besides her.

Tsu'tey had already mounted Yllä and the pair was waiting impatiently for the other two to join them. Yllä was desperate for a flight and Tsu'tey was craving episoth seeds. Awa would never admit it but at first she had hated the seeds and the only reason she ate them was to impress him and with time she grew to love the seeds. She now had a weakness for them that she was trying her best to hide for him, if only to keep that smug smirk off his face and endless teasing.

Awa swung her leg over Lilo's back and placed it in the correct position and then righted herself to sit comfortably atop her ikran. "Where did you say you saw the pxorna plants?" She called up to her mate before telling Lilo to fly up to them. The ascent was smooth and fast, just like she had trained it to be.

He shook his head. "Not far south from here. Txanni was the one who told me about them."

"Txanni? Haven't heard from him since you two had a fight about who moved your knife last hunt" She clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth and maneuvered Lilo to face south of the hometree.

Tsu'tey grumbled and Yllä snarled in unison. Two grumpy men, she thought, who would have thought. "I know he was the one who moved it, but I forgave him for it long ago. My guess is that he's too ashamed to come to you after he yelled at you"

"As he should" Awa nodded and before giving Lilo yet another command, this time to fly. They soared past Tsu'tey and Yllä who only gaped at them before following.

Awa stared at the giant plants just like she did every time she came in contact with them. They were taller than the Na'vi and not exactly small in terms of width. She saw how two of the plants vibrated, a sign that they were just about to explode with ripe seeds for the taking.

"Careful" Tsu'tey warned her and pushed her behind him as he stepped closer to the plants that hid his treasure. "They'll explode any minute. They've certainly earned their name."

She scoffed and plopped down on one of the fallen trees that laid just behind them. It was almost bare from bark and moss but was no less beautiful for it. There were marks and scratches from when animals had used it and in the lightning that the meadow they were in provided she could see the patches that would glow prettily in purple, green, pink or blue during nighttime.

"I need to talk to Jake when we get back" Awa stated and sat cross legged on the dry tree. "I think I've been too hard on him" If only you knew of the betrayal, she thought to herself, knowing that she would never be able to tell him until Jake did. She was sure that Jake and her could have been friends if she hadn't found out about what he was doing, no matter if he wasn't doing it anymore. Awa knew it was harsh to judge him for it, but the betrayal was fresh in her mind, just like last time. Jake claimed to love Pandora and the Na'vi, and that he wasn't spying on them anymore but until she had proof she couldn't allow herself to believe him.

Tsu'tey hummed but she could see that he wasn't happy about it. "What do you mean? He sees less than a rock and he's an idiot"

"I mean that I'm supposed to understand what he's going through, more or less. I had to fight for my place here more than he will ever understand but because of my sacrifices he has the chance to join us. I wished that someone would be nice to me during my first time with you, I prayed to every god and goddess I had ever heard of that the Na'vi would stop hating me, but then I realised I had to fight for it. Now I realise that Jake can't fight the same way I did, and that I should be to him what no one was to me"

"You don't owe him anything, my love. You fought tooth and nail so he would be able to get as far as he has" Tsu'tey shot back with a scowl on his face as he thought back to all the trials, challenges and pain she had to get through to be at the point she was at today. "You did what no one else had before, and you built that right from nothing. You had no rights among us and you fought until you did, and now Jake can benefit from that."

She nodded, still feeling that sharp sting of guilt inside of her but she was feeling better after the reassurance he gave her. Awa didn't like Jake, but that didn't mean that she wanted to see him suffer as she did.

The two didn't say much more after that and after collecting the seeds from two of the giant plants, or rather trees, the two flew back home with only a few scratches from when they clumsily enough couldn't escape the sharp, ripe seeds that exploded from the plant. Tsu'tey had already eaten a few of them, after removing the acidic and unpleasant shell of it, but had given the rest of them to Awa for safekeeping.

"Jake" She called out at the tall dreamwalker, though he wasn't as tall or muscular as her mate. "Do you have a minute?"

Jake turned to her, surprised that she once again came to him instead of him to her. "Yes- I mean of course. What is it?" He asked her nervously. Last time she came to like this she had ended up confronting him about being a spy. This time he was nervous that she had found out about the other thing.

Awa waved her hand and smiled lightly. "It's nothing. I just need to show you something."

He breathed out a sigh of relief. "I was worried there for a second." Jake grinned at her and then walked up to stand by her side. "So what are you showing me? I need to get back to Neytiri soon-we're going hunting"

"It won't take long, I promise" She put her her arm in his and dragged him to the place she was going to show him. It had been awhile since she had been there but now she had a purpose that led her back there.

"I hope it's not something bad. Or that you're planning on murdering me as soon as we get away from the others." Jake tried to lighten the mood by joking but Awa remained serious and focused.

"I never would have guessed you to be so paranoid." Awa confessed to him. "But I don't know you well enough to say anything about it. I had you pegged down as this big bad marine that couldn't wait for killing off the indigenous people"

He shook his head and glared at her. "I was never here for the killing. My brother died and the RDA wanted me to take his place."

"I'm sorry for your loss." Her lips tugged downwards and she placed a hand on his arm. "I lost my entire family, generations of it. All in one night. That's when I realised there was truly nothing left for me on earth"

Jake gave her a sympathetic look, one that she had seen so many times before and hated with a passion. She didn't need people to feel bad for her losses, they couldn't have done anything, and they had only made her stronger. Her family lived on inside of her and the children she would have. Awa's hand brushed through the ceremonial braid she had made in her hair for the occasion, one that her step father's grandmother's family had passed down through the ages. She had made cornrows braided to the sides and flowed down to where she had twisted her hair into a bun on each side of her head with puffs of teased hair that peaked through it. She had put her own twist to it, her way of honoring both her past and future.

"I'm sorry for your loss"

"Don't be" She told him frankly. "They live on in my memories, and they left in a painless way that many would envy"

Jake was stared at her, speechless. "How did it happen?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" She grinned at him to hide the twisting pain inside of her. Awa wasn't ready to discuss that with him. "We're almost there"

"Where are you taking me?"

"To my grave" Awa's eyes tinkled but her smile was wavering. "Where I left it all behind for them"

The two walked in silence after that, Jake was too stunned by everything that he didn't know what to say, and Awa didn't want to talk anymore to the boy reaching for the stars that she had lowered and placed there.

AN: Okay so I need y'alls help with something. As I said before there will be a sequel to this book but what I want help with is if I should have the same layout as this one (one present time chapter and one flashback chapter), in that case Tsu'tey and Awa's background story will go on in book 2, but the other option is that I continue with the flashback chapters in this book even after the present time story for the first book has ended. So what do you think?

PS: If I wasn't clear enough: The reason that Awa goes from hating Jake, to disliking him to being nice all the time is because she's conflicted about him.