Blood dripped down the side of a wooden chair. A small puddle of crimson had formed and stretched in all directions with glaringly red arms. Harsh, loud pants echoed around in the cold, metallic room. Whimpers were breathed out and ear-piercing cries of excruciating and lingering pain came regularly escaped the tied-up woman. A set of footsteps reverberated around the pair, heavy and steady against the ground.
"Where have you been?" A voice that haunted her asked.
Awa grimaced and shook her head, making blood fall from her beaten face. "I won't tell you." She bared her teeth, blood-stained as they were and dripping with it from the last punch.
"You will." Quaritch told her with a self-satisfied smirk and a tug of his pants. "They all break in the end. Whether with carrot at the end or just stick. I'm fine with either, but that's just me." His smile was full of teeth- like a shark that had just came upon a bleeding fish.
She lowered her head, her defiance dropping by the minute. At the beginning she had been strong enough to fight back, return his comments and anger him. Now Awa was tired of fighting, but she still would not betray them. Even if they hated her they were her people and her loyalty was not that easily shifted.
The colonel walked up to her from behind, slamming his bloody hands down on her fragile shoulders. "You were in their home, I assume. Right above the biggest source of unobtanium, the thing we all came here for." His hands massaged her and she tensed up. Dread filled her aching body but most of her fighting had left her. "I've never had much patience with traitors. Especially those that betray their own kind but for you I've made an exception. You see I've always had a thing for you."
He swaggered around her, his green army pants all she could see. "Of course everyone told me it was a fool's errand but I had this idea set in my mind. I began to court you." Quaritch voice got louder and more firm. "You were very unwilling. Rejected my every touch, every smile, every sweet word. You were too in love with the natives to realise the mistake you were doing. I refused to believe we had lost another bright mind to the savages but as the days went by you left us piece by piece."
Awa sobbed tiredly, her chest heaving with each laboured breath she forced herself to take. Her eyes remained teary but without any of them falling. Awa had no more tears to cry. Already she was beginning everyone to take her away from him- Eywa, Grace, Tsu'tey, Atxa, Ngeha. Her hope and faith in ever getting out of there dwindled by the hour that she remained bound in the empty room, her only company the very man that was torturing her.
"Still I held on hope that I would be able to convince you to come back."
The words tumbled out of her before she realised that she had even opened her mouth. "By harassing me? By touching me when I didn't want you to? If anything you helped drive me away." She spat at him, her head still hanging low and body shivering with pain. "Sorry." Awa whispered, preparing for the blow he would without a doubt give her.
Her head snapped to the side as pain bloomed on the left side of her face. A low whimper tore its way through her throat. Awa almost fell over if it wasn't for him grabbing the end of her chair and pulling her back up. A lone tear fell down her bruised face and down the bleeding wounds, making them sting. She wheezed.
"I don't like hurting you." Quaritch told her with a sympathetic smile. "But you just can't listen, can you? You're trying to betray your own kind and I'm trying to stop you from making that mistake. They can't love you like we can. They don't want you."
"All you've ever done is hurt me." She bitterly stated and let her words hang in the air for awhile until she forced herself to speak again. "What did I ever do to you to deserve this? This pain, this torture?!" Awa exclaimed loudly, making her whole body seize up in pain. "I have done nothing to deserve this!"
Quaritch said nothing, His face fell back into the blank state he usually had as he turned around to grab something off the desk he had brought. "I hoped it wouldn't come to this but you're just too stubborn." His eyes shower her something akin to fondness.
He turned around, showing her what was in his hand. A knife. A long, silver knife that shined in the light, taunting her as he brought the blade closer to her. Alva flinched and tried to back away but his hands followed her. The blade felt cold against her warm skin and the bite it gave as it slit her skin open barely felt amongst the other burning pains he had given her.
"Are you going to kill me?" Awa asked him. She looked up at him for the first time since he had started beating her, eyes tired and vacant. "If so, just get it over with."
He chuckled coldly. "I'm not going to kill you, Awa. I'm trying to save you."
"Pretty weird way to show it." Awa muttered and let her head fall again as she felt yet another slow cut on her arm being made. She felt the warmth of her blood pooling out of the wound but she could only just feel the stinging his knife left behind. All the punches to the head had desensitized her too much to feel the rest of the rough treatment.
"Now, back to business. Where were you?" He curtly asked her, tapping the edge of the knife on her hand. "And don't lie to me. I can always tell."
Awa felt her hands relax, not even tensing or flinching as he made shallow cuts on them. Her legs felt like jelly, her head and heart heavy. The last of her fight had flown out of her like air out of a balloon. She was tired, so very tired. Everything felt hopeless and she wanted to laugh. Humourlessly.
"I was with the Na'vi." She told him, though he already knew that. He was just about to bring the knife down on her again when she rushed out her next answer. "In the hometree!"
Quaritch halted, smiled and tilted his head. "Good. You're finally learning. I told you that they all break in the end."
Awa didn't feel broken, she just felt tired and done with it all. All she wanted was to be back at the hometree and surrounded by her friends. All she wanted was to fade away and never come back. Tears of frustration poured down her cheeks and she sobbed heavily.
"I just want it all to stop." She cried out, her voice breaking with each sob. "I want to go home."
"This is your home."
"No it's not! My home is with the Na'vi."
"Look at you, Awa. You used to be so promising in our cause." He muttered as if he was sad about it. "Now you'd rather run around in a forest with savages than be with your people. Never mind that, your insanity can be cured."
Awa wanted to respond, to fight back but she couldn't. She was too tired to even lift her head. She had been fighting for too long and now she was crashing. A buzzing sound grew in the background and white spots appeared in the corner of her eyes. The buzzing grew until it was all she could hear, and the white spots extended until it was all she could feel.
Quaritch was gone but she could still feel every cut he gave her and the flow of her blood as it escaped her body. She whimpered, scared at what was happening. A vision at this time? How could she defend herself if she was reliving someone else's memories?
A new scenery was painted in front of her. It was the forest, one of her favorite spots. It was a meadow with only young, short trees and high grass with purple flowers in it. She and Atxa spent their breaks there. It was her secret hideout. The sun was warm and bright against her but she didn't look away. It made her feel something other than the tired numbness she was being taken over by.
Two blue figures sat under one of the bigger trees, talking. One of them was tall and had a waistguard, the other shorter and wore feminine clothing. Awa wished she could sit there with them, even if it was Rayfo or any other of Tsu'tey's friends. She could take their harsh words if it meant escaping from Quaritch and his touches.
The vision sharpened and her eyes honed in on the male figure. The big eyes, the scowl, the worry lines and arrogant posture; it was Tsu'tey. The female, greying hair, the feather necklace, the smile; it was Ngeha. Awa limped closer, slapping a hand over her stomach as pain assaulted her. She noticed that she was back in her Na'vi body but the human injuries had followed her.
"You're too harsh on the girl." Ngeha told her companion softly. "She's trying her best."
"I don't care." He stubbornly shot back, his tail swishing. "The demon has no place among the people."
Ngeha sighed and placed a hand on her knee. "She has if she proves herself. If she goes through her iknimaya she is one of the people. Awa needs your help, Tsu'tey, not for you to constantly put her down when all she wants is to belong."
"Hmpf." Tsu'tey responded and glared at the other Na'vi. "I do not want a human to live with us. They are all the same. Evil, greedy and ignorant."
"She's not like the rest of her people. None of them fought like she did. Don't be like them, Tsu'tey. Would you drive away one of our allies just because your pride cannot let you forget?"
Awa stared tensely at them. They were speaking about her? Ngeha was defending her to Tsu'tey, trying to convince him to accept her? A warm feeling spread in her chest that quickly faded when she felt another searing pain from reality hit her.
"Sky people are killing us, Ngeha." He replied in a somber tone. "I cannot forget what her people have done and are still doing. Do not ask me to."
"Do not forget, but forgive her for sins that are not hers to bear. Awa has never killed one of ours," Ngeha reminded him with a gentle smile. "she is brave and her heart strong. She has the soul of one of us. Not to mention that she's not blind, though she sees very little. There is still hope for her."
Awa went to protest until she remembered that she was not physically there. She sat down in front of them, shivering as they looked like through her as if she wasn't there. Her fingers touched one of the newer cuts absentmindedly as she watched the two stare into the forest.
"I do not like her."
"I think you do." Ngeha grinned at him. "If anything I think you like her a bit too much." She teased him, watching Tsu'tey recoil and scowl at her.
"I do not like the demon." He protested loudly, looking scandalized that she would even propose such an idea. "I would kill her in a heartbeat."
Ngeha shook her head and Alva winced at his words. "I do not think you would, not anymore. You're too deep, there's already an attachment to her or you would not be so defensive. Just admit it, to yourself if no one else."
He protested again, letting out an outdrawn hiss. "Fine. I do not wish to kill the demon, but I do not like her." His ears flattened against his head. "She is nothing but dirt."
"One day you will say differently." Ngeha told her and Awa saw his cold expression waver before she was pulled away from the image.
The green scenery turned into white before that turned into the steely grey of her cage.
"Welcome back." Quaritch voice greeted her and the full extent of her injuries hit her all at once. She screamed as she felt him punch her in the stomach, the already tender and numb area exploding in bright, burning pain that made her want to throw up and then pass out.
"I hate you." Awa whimpered as her body leaned to the side, the ropes threatening to give way any minute. She heard a ringing in her ears and she felt lightheaded as blow after blow rained down on her. The only reason she beared through the pain was because of the sliver of hope the vision had given her, hope that Tsu'tey was warming up to her, hope that Ngeha would fight for her and hope that soon she will have earned her place with the Na'vi.
AN: Personally didn't like it, I'm a bit rusty but I hope y'all enjoyed it anyways. This is the darkest part of her past, I think, so it will only get better from here.