Raven: Can you get them out Atrus?

Atrus: No! She's got this door padlocked!

Me: HAHAHAH!

Raven: Story please.

It was around six the next morning when everyone else got home from prom. Roger took Ryan home since Mark was still talking to Ria and Angelo and Jason came back too, or more like Angelo basically dragged Jason home. When Mark and Ria got home, Mark was furious.

"Roger what the hell is your problem?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You called your daughter a slut?"

"Listen I was very mad I know I shouldn't have…"

Just then Jason began his rant, "O-oh s-so it's ALWAYS you you you? E-everbyone else has their famblies but I'm all alone!" he said crying.

Ryan came over to Ria, "What's with this whole clam up thing?"

"Ryan I tried to tell…"

Meanwhile Roger and Mark were at each others throats, "How could you be so cruel?"

"I'm not cruel, you're just soft!"

"WHAT?"

"You let everyone walk all over you! Ryan starts crying and you nearly die!"

"Oh, screw you!"

"Well maybe if you did that more I wouldn't be so evil!"

Maureen ran in as this feud got louder, "What the hell is going on?"

Angelo started again, "Okay, Jason's upset because he feels left out, Ryan's upset with Ria and their dads are either mad because Roger called Ria a slut and Mark's furious or Mark won't sleep with him I dunno" he said confused.

Joanne came in a few minutes later, "Guys I just got a call from the State dept of…what the?" She saw the entire house either throwing stuff, yelling or crying at someone else and couldn't take it anymore. She ran over to the door, slammed and locked it, getting everyone's attention.

"OKAY THAT'S IT! EVERYONE SIT DOWN NOW AND SHUT UP!" she yelled.

Everyone quieted down and waited for what would happen next. Angelo stood up, "Look at you all, everyone used to get along and now we're all fighting and screaming at each other. The neighbors keep calling asking if someone's being killed. Jason started drinking again because he feels left out. Why are we doing this to ourselves?"

Joanne spoke next, "I can't count how many times I come home and someone's mad at someone else, another one runs out on everyone…I didn't know what to do or what to expect. But I know now. What this family needs is a total intervention, and it's gonna happen now! I don't care if this takes us all day no one is leaving until we get this settled. Now let's find out what's upsetting everyone so much."

By this time Jason was sobered up, "Okay, ever since my dad died I feel like everyone's treating me like the ward. I lose my dad and then magically everyone else decides to treat Angelo and I like Cinderella. This isn't even a boheme family it's my friends with their respective parents and then two queer kids who just stuck around."

Maureen jumped in, "Okay now that's out in the air, who else has a problem to talk about?"

Mark put his hand up, "Okay so Roger thinks I'm a pushover because I care about the kids so much but I'm not, he's just too rough. Like this one time I was getting ready to take a nap and he comes running out the closet dressed as Dr. Frank-N-Furter and jumps…."

"OKAY more than we need to know!" Maureen interrupted covering the kids ears. "Does anyone have an issue family related that's not just plain freaky?"

Ria couldn't take it anymore and stood up, "I don't know where Ryan and I stand. Ever since the wedding I don't know what to feel anymore."

Ryan looked at her stunned, "What? You think that just because we got these little chains and lit a torch we're blood?"

"I told you that when we were in the car! And with all the interviews they keep throwing at us all it's gonna come out soon!"

Angelo added, "She has a point Ryan, and it's really gonna get worse when Glory shows up."

Mark and Roger had pained looks on their faces, "Oh shit, this wasn't supposed to happen now."

Ryan turned around, "Who's Glory?"

"You didn't know?" Angelo whispered

"Okay, Jason you hide the silverware and bottles, Mo you guard the door and I'll call 911" Joanne whispered

Ria got up, "Dad what is he talking about?"

"Mi hija, we were gonna tell you in a few days but I guess I should tell you now. Awhile back I told Mark that I wanted him to remember me even after I was gone. I said that it was too bad we couldn't have a kid together. Then he suggested that…"

"Papi if you tell me Mark's pregnant, I'm gonna die and then hit the author and narrators for making this an mpreg" she said. (ha-ha I love author/character interaction)

"No…we're in the final steps to adopting this two year old girl from India and we're naming her Glory Nadia Marcela."

Everyone sat there in shock as both kids eyes turned black with rage, Joanne got on the phone with 911 to keep the medics on standby. Angelo curled up in a ball crying at what he caused.

"Dad are you back on smack? It's bad enough we're nearly poor and sick but now you decide to turn us from a bizarre two-dad-blended-family with two kids in love with each other into a god awful crowd with two dads, two dead moms, two step-kids who love each other one white, one Puerto Rican/Irish and then one kid who's Indian? Why don't we just move to Oompah Loompah land and live creepily ever after?" Ria screamed

Jason was standing between the four of them trying to keep them apart but was knocked down by Ryan lunging at them both. He got up and held them back. Joanne got off the phone and sat them all down.

"Alright, enough confessions this is one issue we need to discuss now" she said.

Kyle came in with some yogurt and juice for everyone as they all settled in for hour one of the great sixteen hour intervention.

Raven: OMG

Me: I'm trying to end this story with a bang; this is one of the last few chaps

Atrus: (with blowtorch)

Me: Atry leave them alone

Raven: R&R!

Me: I have champagne!