"Where could they have gone?" Buffy asked Giles as if he already knew .
"Maybe Spike and Xander ended up wherever it is that Jack Sparrow guy came from," Willow offered. Buffy frowned.
"I hope not." Just then Anya barged in.
"Where is he Where is he Where is he?" She rampaged about the room, half sobbing. "We have to save Xander. What if he's hurt or trapped or alone or dismembered or eviscerated or..."
"Let's not jump to conclusions now," Giles said in an attempt to calm her down. "I'm sure Xander is just fine."
"This is Spike's doing, I know it," Buffy growled, picking up the phone.
"Back at Angel Investigations Spike was working through Angel's blood supply. Xander on Cordelia's coffee. They still hadn't the faintest idea where it was that Jack had run off to. The phone rang loudly. Xander jumped--Spike had bit of a laugh at his expense.
"Angel Investigations. Helping the helpless for a small fee," Cordelia said in a sunny voice. "Oh my god. Buffy!" Doyle had come to join Xander and Spike at the small table. They were all listening intently. "Uh-huh... No, haven't seen them... No, it's daylight... Yeah, I'll tell him... Let you know... Take care of yourself... Bye." Xander sighed out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding.
"Thanks for covering for us, Cordy!"
"Right. It's no b, Xander." She smiled, moving to sort through some more files. Doyle eyed the exchange with not a small amount of jealousy. Xander's eyes widened at the realisation.
"You like Cordelia!" he accused in a voice she couldn't hear as she hummed through her monotonous tasks.
"Yes, well, she hates me."
"Well, you are a demon," Spike helpfully pointed out. Doyle panicked, looking to see if the brunette had heard.
"She doesn't know?" Xander couldn't believe it. "I mean, you are only half, but... Damn. I'm sorry, man."
"How'd you..?" Spike started, but Jack and Elizabeth took that moment to come into the room and startle them all. "Who's the bint?" Elizabeth frowned.
"You were so right," she bit out, glaring at Jack. "It's no wonder you two got along."
"Tetchy," Spike chided, grabbing a cold blood bag and tearing it open.
"Is that...?" The blonde flinched. Spike smiled toothily, vamping out and sinking into the plastic with his fangs. "Right. Sorry I asked." Spike deflated. The girl didn't frazzle easy, he'd give her that. "So where's Will?"
"Alright," Jack confessed, holding his ringed index fingers up in his own defence. "Here's the thing..." Elizabeth rolled her eyes, crossing her arms.
"I should know better than to trust the word of a pirate."
"Probably," Spike cut in, still in gameface.
"Welcome to Angel Investigations. We help the helpless!" Cordy wrinkled her nose, making the helpful face.
"Wait, Jack, maybe you aren't so useless after all..." Elizabeth smiled, "I'm Elizabeth Swann, Jack's... friend." She said the word as if it came naturally, but it was apparent to everyone in the room that it hadn't.
"Oh yay, customers!" Cordy clapped her hands together. "Doyle, wake up Angel, will you?"
"Angel?" Elizabeth inquired.
"Souled vampire," Jack answered quickly. Elizabeth simply nodded.
After all was explained and Angel was up and at 'em Cordy went about the research thing. Xander shirked out any of that by cleaning up the earlier mess he had made of Angel's books earlier. Angel himself drifted into the room.
"Y'know, I'm sorry about this..."
"Doesn't matter."
"We're intruding on your lives with our little... pirate problem."
"'We'?" Angel mocked. "If I didn't know any better I would say you were getting a little cozy with my childe."
"He kidnapped me!" Xander protested, his cheeks flaming. Angel rolled his eyes.
"Yes, and that's why you've made so many attempts to leave and why he had to tie you up while you were sleeping to drag you here seeing as he is chipped.."
Meanwhile, Spike and Jack were doing their best to annoy Elizabeth Swann to the point of breaking. Finally she just couldn't take it.
"Jack, where's the compass?" jack feigned innocence, smiling sweetly. "That compass is Will's only chance!"
"Good afternoon, sir. My name is William Turner and I am afraid I have lost track of my fiancée." Doyle smiled.
"About yayheigh, blonde hair? Go by Elizabeth?"
Spike snuck away while Jack and Elizabeth were arguing to try and find out what made the rectangular object so valuable. He opened the box carefully, and sure enough there was an old pirate's compass. But instead of pointing north its stubborn peg pointed towards the west side of the small office. Spike sighed, "Greatt, I stole a faulty compass." He moved back out to the mini fridge area to see a new face. He was as handsome as Jack, but much more hygienic.
"William!" Elizabeth crooned delightedly, leaping into the man's arms and sharing a passionate kiss. Spike flinched and set out to find Xander, unknowingly wandering west.
Here he found the annoying chit, Cordelia, his equally annoying sire, and Xander, who was annoying up until recently.
"So let me get this straight."Cordelia processed. "You want us to help you find away to remove this chip from your formerly evil vampire buddy?" she asked incredulously.
"Alright you stupid bint. Still evil just can't kill.. and? me and Harris? Not buddies." Spike dropped his human guise, snarling and walking towards her menacingly. Angel stepped in front of her.
"Spike," he barked at his childe, baring his fangs. "Why the hell did you come here?"
"Oh wot?" Spike asked innocently. "You don't love me?" He pouted cinematically, Xander chuckled. Angel was less amused. Spike relented, shrugging, then looked to Xander. The boy looked... awkward, but... supportive? What the fuck. "Look. The slayer's annoying enough as it is. I needed someone, preferably a demon; ideally a vampire--that's you--with resources." A beat. "I don't have resources," Spike said seriously.
"Alright," Angel sighed, giving in. "Here's the deal. I don't help you, I don't tell Buffy you are here but I will not help. I will lend Xander my resources and let him perform any ritual or chip-removing act on the property, but you listen to me, childe. You go back to your murderous ways and I will stake you myself." Xander squirmed, this was getting personal.
"I'll just... yeah." Xander squicked out, skirting out of the room. He decided to check on Jack and his pretty friend. When he found them Jack had acquired another pretty friend, and he had not just thought of a man as pretty, but Goddess, did this man..rate know ugly people?
"Hey..Xander," Jack choked out, surprisingly lucid for a man being pinned to the wall by his throat.
"Am I... interrupting something?" His life was so fucked.