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Chapter 19

Stupid and Reckless?

Bella

What the hell, what was that all about?

With that question, I let myself fall backwards onto my bed. My thoughts were just so jumbled that I got a headache.

Edward was here. He had wanted to see me. But why? He didn't care about me. He had left me to seek distraction and because I was not good enough. He should not want to see me. And most importantly, he shouldn't want to come back here. What was this?

He was much more beautiful than I remembered. A memory that I had pushed aside a long time ago. Eyes of liquid gold in an angelic face. Striking facial features, a straight nose, arched eyebrows, full lips. and tousled bronze hair. An appearance to kneel down at. Add to that an overall charming manner that had to blow every woman's mind. No matter how old she was. After all, I was actually twice his age by now and should be looking at men who were my own age.

I didn't pay attention to whether my children's friends were good-looking or not.

I laughed at that thought.

Edward was over a hundred.

A lot of things had come back to me this evening. For example, that he had studied medicine.

I sat up and viewed my bandage.

How careful he had been. How gentle. It hadn't hurt a bit when he massaged the ointment in. And how tenderly his fingers had played with mine. As if it were just a breath of fresh air. As earlier, I remembered back at it. A pleasant shiver ran down my spine. I thought I felt a small electric shock when I touched his marble skin.

Why was he behaving like that? Like in the past? Reminding me how it was with him before? Why didn't he just leave me alone? Did he want to remind me in order to hurt me again? ... Or was he simply being polite? Perhaps he was not completely indifferent to the past we shared and he wanted to be friends with me, since we were in the same town.

The longer I thought about it, the more likely this possibility seemed to me. In the long run, it would be hard to avoid running into each other eventually. Why should we avoid each other? There was no reason for that. We were both adults, even if he didn't necessarily look it. Our relationship had passed and we had both gotten over it by now. Him better, me worse. How bad I really was back then. he could not know and I would not tell him. It was not his fault that I had fallen for him body and soul. All that was behind me and I was done with it. Maybe he was just happy that there was someone he knew here. With whom he could talk to without concern. From whom he did not need to keep secrets. Someone who already knew everything about him anyway - like his family.

Yes ... That must be it. Simply a nice old acquaintance.

At some point, I tried to get up – or rather, to step up on my foot. I squinted in anticipation of pain. Carefully, I touched the ground with the tips of my toes and gradually, very slowly, shifted my weight onto the sprained foot. I felt no pain. I got brave and put the rest of the weight on it all at once.

"Ahh ...", I cried out involuntarily and dropped to my knees. Damn! Why did Edward always have to be right?

I straightened up, grabbed my pajamas, and hobbled to the bathroom. I rolled my eyes in annoyance as I stood in front of my vanity. In front of the mirror lay a message in writing so neat that it appeared intimidating, and on top of it were two tablets.

Don't play the heroine, just take it!

You don't have to tell anyone, either.

Only under protest did I swallow the medicine and then in a bad mood devoted myself to my nightly ritual.

I was hobbling out of the bathroom when there was a soft knock on my door. I was startled and held my breath.

"Mom, are you awake still?" Leah asked softly.

Relieved, I expelled the excess air and opened the door.

Did I really think Edward would come back? How silly of me.

With unfathomable expressions my children stood before me.

"How are you doing, Mom?" asked Leah, concerned.

"Fine. Why?" I asked unconcernedly and walked over to the bed.

I paused for a moment when I got there.

No pain? Hesitantly, I rotated my foot around ... until it hurt again.

I bit my lower lip angrily.

This was Edward's work. The bandage was so cleverly tight that I could definitely walk if I didn't overdo it. I would have come up the stairs on my own without any problems, but he had to carry me.

"Well ... maybe because Edward's been here all evening?" Jake asked, dropping onto the other side of the bed.

"Yeah, that was a little ... surprising," I admitted, snuggling into my blanket.

"Tell me, Mom. How was it?" asked Leah, climbing into bed as well.

I thought for a moment and let some scenes go through my mind again briefly.

He was standing behind the door that I had voluntarily opened. I had known that HE stood behind it and still the sight of him had robbed me of my sanity. I had actually forgotten to breathe. So bizarre. And when I came to, it didn't really get any better. Those golden eyes right in front of me. It was impossible for me to take my eyes away from him.

How he had massaged my foot. Heavenly.

No, Bella. Medical! It was medically necessary. Nothing more.

But it was still nice, whispered a voice in the back of my head. We had looked into each other's eyes for a long time and it had made me dizzy.

Jesus, Bella. You're thirty-seven years old, don't act like a teenager with a crush!

His skin. I had forgotten how it felt. Cold and hard. Unblemished. But also, somehow like velvet. And again, our eyes had been on each other. Only the stupid doorbell had distracted me from his face ... Did I just complain about that? And then ... when he had left. His lips on my forehead.

I touched the spot and thought it was still burning.

Why did he do this to me? Upsetting me like this? Just like in the past! Oh Man. What was that all about?

"Unusual and familiar at the same time. A lot of things reminded me of the past ... He hasn't changed ... I was really afraid of meeting him again, but I've come to wonder why I was so afraid of it. He will not harm me, and neither will he harm you ... He even said that you are great kids and I agree with him," I tried to explain calmly.

The two smiled sheepishly.

They hated it when I said things like that. They got embarrassed. Especially in front of their friends.

"You're biased. You are our mother," Leah contradicted.

"What else would you think of us, even if we had become losers?" said Jake, annoyed.

"What else did Becky say?" I now asked curiously.

"She can't quite believe he's a vampire. Edward was far too nice. She thinks vampires should be vicious, dangerous, and shady."

I laughed.

"That's just the way his family is."

Leah noticed the list of phone numbers and asked what that was all about.

I explained what happened and my children were equally amazed.

"He won't tell his family who you are?" asked Jake, uncomprehending.

"Why not?" Leah asked, too.

"He's leaving it up to me to decide if I want to see them," I explained. "He said he wouldn't be able to stop Alice from coming here if she knew about me."

"So, he's making sure no one confronts you against your will!" Apparently, Leah understood the reason for his sneakiness and gave Jake a strange look. Somehow, she understood it all.

"Why would they come in the first place? After all, no one said goodbye to you at that time," Jake asked further.

His last words were already buzzing around in my head, and now I thought about them in more detail.

I shrugged my shoulders.

"He said the entire family misses me." It kind of stood in contradiction to back then. No one had said goodbye to me. The 'entire' ... He had put extra emphasis on this word. So that included Edward as well? He had missed me? Why would he do that? HE left!

We talked some more until eventually all three of us fell asleep.

The next morning, I felt like the alarm clock was messing with me. The night could not be over yet.

Jake and Leah looked just as sleepy as I did. I smiled to myself.

All of us falling asleep, while chatting in my big bed, hadn't happened to us for a long time. Especially not in the middle of the week when we had to get up early the next morning. But something like this was one of my nicest experiences with them.

They had the first two classes free today and could have actually slept longer, while I had to go back to work at eight today. So, I was sorry that my alarm clock also woke them up. Still, they got up with me. It was only when I thoughtlessly got out of bed that the events of the previous evening intruded my consciousness. When I felt the stabbing pain in my ankle.

Edward! He had been here!

I pushed the thought aside. I had to go to work. I quickly took off my bandage and went to take a shower. We had breakfast together, I said goodbye, and took my things.

When I opened the front door, I paused, and abruptly stopped moving.

There was a car parked in my driveway!

"What ...?" I asked, but I didn't know who or what to ask. I didn't recognize the car, didn't know who owned it, why it was parked in my driveway of all places, and I didn't see anyone either.

I was about to go back to the twins to ask them - maybe they had arranged to meet someone this morning - when I heard a voice.

"You don't seriously think I'm going to let you drive a bike with a sprained ankle?" a charming, slightly condescending, voice asked, without me seeing him.

Guiltily, I turned my gaze to my foot and bit my lower lip.

That was the foot with which I needed to shift gears. I hadn't even thought about how I was going to do that yet, since it still hurt when I moved it wrong. And switching gears would be wrong.

I took a step forward and there he was.

Edward looked me straight in the eye with his charming crooked smile and leaned arrogantly next to the door, white arms crossed in front of his chest and one leg bent against the wall. My breath caught for a fleeting moment at the sight.

"How long have you been standing here?" I asked suspiciously, squinting my eyes. I hadn't heard him, and apparently Jake and Leah hadn't either.

"Long enough to keep you from doing something stupid and reckless," I got a presumptuous reply.

I ducked inwardly.

I had not kept my promise. However, instead of feeling guilty about it - I considered apologizing for a whole two seconds - I reacted angrily. It made me angry how he already determined my life again, although he had no business in it. I was not willing to bend to his will as I had in the past. His opinion had always carried more weight than mine, but those days were over. I had grown up. I could do what I thought was right.

Stubbornly I pushed my chin out.

"I can very well take care of myself!" I hissed.

"I can see that!" he returned calmly, pointing to my foot.

"Nothing has ever happened to me on my baby! Not even a scratch."

"Let's keep it that way!"

"And how am I supposed to get back home?"

"I'll pick you up again!"

"You've got school!"

"Your health is more important!"

We had both gotten louder and louder, so Jake and Leah showed up in the hallway to see what was going on.

After a brief explanation I grounded my children for the rest of their lives.

They were on Edward's side.

Reluctantly, I brought my helmet back inside and exchanged the motorcycle jacket for a light summer jacket.

I would have stomped furiously past Edward if my foot was playing along.

Smiling with satisfaction, he opened the car door for me and held out a hand to help me get in.

I ignored him and slammed the door.

"So, where are we driving?" he asked sweetly. A tone that made me tremble slightly.

"Prescott Institute. Front Street," I said spitefully.

He chuckled and started driving.

"How's your ankle today?" Edward asked after a moment.

"Better," I said tersely.

"Why are you so angry?"

"Because I'm constantly being patronized!"

"And that bothers you!" he stated.

"Of course, that bothers me. It always has!" I continued to nag.

"I just don't want you to get hurt," he said softly.

"Why?" My health was no longer any of his business.

"Because of your children, among other things," he said quietly, and placatingly put his hand on mine.

I curled up guiltily in my seat and said nothing else.

I owed it to them to stop being reckless and stupid. Unfortunately, he was right. But I didn't normally act like that anymore either. As soon as I found out about the pregnancy, I changed my life. Driving a motorcycle was really the most dangerous thing in my life and I always drove carefully and never sped.

Among other things? What did he mean by that? Who else would have an interest in my wellbeing?

I was about to ask when Edward spoke up before me.

"What are you doing at the Prescott Institute?" he asked curiously.

"I'm a biology lab technician."

"And what are you investigating right now?"

I grinned.

"Well, until the day before yesterday, I was looking for possible biological reasons why the wildlife in this area - especially deer, elk and the like - have been dying or leaving the area in inexplicable numbers since the summer vacations began!" I replied arrogantly, folding my arms in front of my chest.

I was curious about his response and looked at him steadfastly.

He actually turned a little pale and his face froze for a moment.

"How could an unexplained dying be determined in the first place?" he asked innocently, but delayed.

"Because the animals were already marked with transmitters years ago," I continued to explain amiable, without averting my gaze from him.

"And did you find an explanation?" he continued feigning innocence.

"You!" I now accused him directly.

An enchanting smile appeared on his mouth as we already arrived at the side entrance of the laboratory. I looked at my watch.

I had some time yet to continue looking at his reaction to my examination.

He turned off the engine, turned in my direction and looked at me with a captivating gaze while lightly stroking my hand.

"But you won't tell anyone, will you?" he purred so charmingly and with such a seductive look in his eyes that my heart skipped a beat.

It took me a moment to realize what Edward was doing to me right now. That was the manner in which he was able to impose his will when he wanted something from women. A better table at the restaurant, for example, or changing his school schedule.

"I never betrayed you!" I affirmed.

"I know," he said confidently.

"But I have thought about it," I said now, in response to his smugness.

Immediately, his gaze became cautious.

"I was wondering what my boss would say if I wrote vampires as the causation in my report," I smiled teasingly at him and he laughed as heartily as I did.

He got out, walked to my side of the car, and opened the door.

Again, he held out a hand for me so that I could get out easier. This time I grabbed it and Edward continued to hold it after I was already standing and he closed the door again.

"What time are you done this afternoon?" he asked, not letting go of my hand and standing right in front of me.

Somehow, I just felt a little ... surrounded.

"At 4:00 p.m. ... But don't get any ideas about leaving school early. I'll be able to wait those few minutes," I admonished him. After all, I knew how important it was for their masquerade not to stand out, and Edward hadn't been in school yesterday.

"I promise," he replied in a charming tone.

Then he sensually put his free hand on my cheek, bent down a bit, and gave me a soulful kiss on the other cheek.

A gesture that seemed to last for ages.

"See you this afternoon, Bella," he whispered.

"See you later," I murmured, a little dazed, and turned with a slight dizziness in the direction where I thought the entrance was.

Thank you for reading!