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Chapter 24

At Night, when Everything is Quiet

Edward

Quietly, I left her room, stood outside her door for a moment.

How I would love to lie next to her now like I had done before and listen to her dreams. I was very curious to see what her nightly monologue would be like after this evening. But I would not stay or sneak back to her later like I used to. It was too early for that. Besides, I would not do it again without her knowledge.

When I turned around, Jake was standing there, leaning against his bedroom door, looking at me unfathomably.

He wondered what was going through my mind at that moment, while I had put my hands devoutly to her door.

"That I used to be with her when she was sleeping ... She speaks in her sleep."

"We all do, unfortunately," he admitted.

"That can be very interesting," I noted.

"And embarrassing," Jake added.

I nodded and smiled sentimentally.

"It's almost midnight. You'd better go to sleep," I admonished him. Bella would be angry with me if I didn't send her son back to bed immediately. Wolves also needed enough sleep.

Jake nodded, but still walked down the hall toward the stairs.

"No one probably thought of the coffee maker," he explained to himself.

I just looked at him questioningly and went with him.

"None of us are any good without coffee. The first one awake turns it on."

"Oh, I see," was all I said.

Bella didn't used to like coffee. 'Bitter' was all she'd ever said and didn't understand why the rest of the world was so fond of it. Neither did I, for that matter. But I watched him prepare the machine.

"What about your trip on Saturday actually," I asked, trying to break the awkward silence.

"What about it?"

"Without a car?" I specified my question.

"Ben is driving. He's only got a little Honda, but it'll be fine for three people."

"But you are four," I smiled at him. If Becky's mother hadn't sent a message to her daughter immediately, he couldn't know that yet.

He didn't seem to understand me and was thinking hard by that what I meant.

"Becky's mom was here ... she's allowed to go," I said, and all of a sudden, I had two much-too-warm arms around me and heard an indefinable but apparently enthusiastic squiel in my ear. "Come back down, or you'll wake the two of them up," I tried to slow Jake down.

I rebuked myself in my head.

Earlier I had wanted to send Jake to bed, but now he was far too exhilarated by my thoughtless comment to go to sleep again.

His thoughts were racing with ideas by what he could experience with Becky over the weekend. Sex, however, was not on his fictitious list. Instead, he reorganized the drive. He went through the available vehicles of the entire group.

Before he did any more complicated thinking - complicated for the middle of the night - I broke through his thoughts.

"You're welcome to take my car again," I offered.

Jake looked at me again as incredulously as he had a few hours before.

"Why are you doing this?" he now asked. His thoughts were already enthusiastic, but he was questioning my motives and looking for my ulterior objective. He believed I just wanted him and Leah away from Bella so I could be alone with her.

"That's not it, Jake. Bella is happy when you are, and I want nothing but that. My agenda is to help you if I can. That's all I care about. She sees how happy you both are with Ben and Becky. And she doesn't want your happiness to be clouded by anything ... Not even by herself," I said honestly and received a questioning face in response. "You were thinking about earlier - because of my instruction that she should not walk alone - that you would stay home. But she would have talked you into it until you finally gave in," I continued to explain.

Jake considered for a moment and ultimately agreed.

Bella was like that. Selfless. Accepting that she would continue to injure herself, she didn't want to stand in the way of her children.

"I guess I should get used to you being here more often," he considered, really making friends with that thought.

"Only if Bella lets me," I corrected. "Good night, Jake," I said farewell and Jake made his way to his bed.

"I would wish you the same, but what do vampires like you actually do at night?" he asked, still curious.

"I'll tell you when it's not the middle of the night," I said, played reproving.

He took the hint and quickly went up the stairs.

Before I left the house, I made sure all the windows and doors on the first floor were locked, grabbed Bella's key from the dresser, and closed the door behind me.

I was in too good a mood to get in the car. I wanted to run through the clear night. However, it only took me a few minutes to walk home.

I sat down at my desk and did the homework to be handed in today.

Among others, an essay for English, which I now wrote for the ninth time. The teachers didn't get any more imaginative over time in terms of choosing topics.

After twenty minutes I had already finished all my homework, although I took my time.

12:37 a.m.

I already suspected that this night would not be over fast enough.

I turned on some music and got the idea to reorganize my CD shelf.

I tried to arrange them according to Bella's preferences, but only realized that I no longer knew Bella as well as Jake had assumed I did. I had very confidently pushed the first CD onto the shelf - Debussy - but the longer I thought by that, the more questionable this decision seemed to me.

I sat down at my laptop and went through my long list of music tracks.

I didn't have to think of which songs to choose for Bella and burned a CD. I polished the blank CD extensively until it shone and labeled it neatly before placing it in a colorful sleeve and wrapped it with care in wrapping paper.

1:33 a.m.

What had I been doing all night for the past nineteen years? I should have answered Jake immediately, to remind myself what I usually did.

Without further ado, I went to Rosalie and asked her for the spare part for the children's car.

A VW Golf Cross did not correspond to the usual preference of any of us, which is why we had never owned such a car, but we had once given one to a self-sacrificing and caring girl via various indirections. So, it was quite conceivable that Rose had the part in her extensive collection. She disappointed me, but we ordered the appropriate part on the Internet.

"I haven't seen Samantha since the incident in the parking lot," I considered aloud. Last night I had talked to Carlisle and today she had not been at school.

"We gave her a little hell. Without Carlisle and Esmé's knowledge," Em explained, visibly satisfied.

I doubted that Samantha would be impressed by their words.

"How did she fool you like that, anyway?" asked Rose, and I related the details, which infuriated them both even more.

Meanwhile, I myself was surprised that I could tell them so easily. Without the feeling of contempt. Was it because Bella knew and didn't hold it against me?

"You thought it was Bella the entire time while you ...?" asked Rose sympathetically.

"Yes. I got completely lost in my memories that evening," I admitted.

"We shouldn't have given her a tongue-lashing, but rather knocked her head off!" growled Em angrily.

"Why wasn't she in school?" I inquired. We were always careful not to attract attention. Skipping school was therefore only an option for us in exceptional cases. When the sun was shining, for example.

"Fear!" grinned Em.

"We warned her we'd act on your threat single-handedly if she got too close!" added Rose comfortably.

When asked what exactly was going on between me and these Native American kids, I just smiled evasively.

I wouldn't say anything to anyone without Bella's permission.

Which led me to pay a visit to my favorite sister.

2:28 a.m.

"Where have you been all this time?" greeted Alice, whining, and jumped on my back to keep me from fleeing immediately.

"You really don't know?" I asked in amazement.

She just shook her head in offense and climbed off my back.

Since I had basically been acting strangely by my standards all week and had been away more than at home for two days, I had assumed Alice had already seen through my little secret with her gift and just out of consideration hadn't said anything yet before she could ask me why. But now I realized through reading her thoughts that she really had no idea. She had tried to get a vision of me, but had not succeeded.

She couldn't see me with Bella?

"You appear freshly in love," Jasper said quietly, as he thought Alice wouldn't hear us because she was fetching something from the next room.

But Alice was very perceptive. She looked at me immediately when the words were past his lips.

Her gaze was like an accusation.

I was very sorry not to be able to tell her the truth. Alice and I rarely kept secrets from each other and I knew how much she also loved Bella.

"Because I am," I was able to at least admit.

I smirked at Alice.

She was stunned. It was inconceivable to Alice that I could forget Bella.

Jasper also considered what kind of woman I should have met who could so easily end my long period of mental fantasies. But unlike Alice, he was more delighted by that and tensely awaited my explanation - or the introduction of said lady.

"Soon, Alice," I said placatingly to both of them.

"I'll be watching you!" she threatened, tapping her temple.

"I'd be shocked if you didn't," I smiled at her and tousled her short hair. "But if you see it, please keep it to yourself," I followed up pleadingly - but whispering - and gave her a kiss on the forehead. She would disappoint me in that regard when she found out. She would freak out and no one would be able to stop her from running to Bella immediately.

3:09 a.m.

There were no lights on at the main house, so I went back to my own.

What was I supposed to do for almost three hours?

I leaned indecisively against my front door and looked over my furnishings.

At some point I began to imagine how Bella would encounter this little house. How she would walk from room to room. Looking at the pictures on the walls. Commenting on the countless books on the shelves, some of which were also standing in her own. Examined the kitchen. I smirked. I had a fully equipped kitchen with the best and most expensive appliances - as it was in the other houses before we bought them - but not even the refrigerator was plugged in. A small consolation: I owned a fully automatic coffee machine that offered all kinds of coffee variations. Bella would seemingly be pleased by that.

3:33 a.m.

I went to take a shower and took my time with it. When I stepped out of the shower after what felt like an eternity - 3:51 a.m. - and involuntarily looked in the mirror in front of me, I paused briefly.

The face looked familiar, but it looked excited. I hadn't seen it like that for nineteen years.

With a towel wrapped around my hips and rubbing my hair dry with another, I walked into the bedroom to the closet.

What should I wear? What would Bella like?

Alice was still making sure that there were enough and, above all, only expensive clothes hanging in all of our closets. Bella had once made fun of it, while I actually just found it convenient not to have to think about it.

I wondered.

When was the last time I had bought myself something to wear? It had been in April, 1950. Just before Alice came to live with us.

"Hello, Edward," I heard a flirtatious voice behind me.

I winced and swore to myself.

I hadn't heard her coming because my mind was preoccupied with Bella the whole time.

Suspiciously, I turned around.

Barely clothed, Samantha lay offering herself on my bed.

I was overcome by her audacity. She had never gone this far before.

"What do you want here?" I asked dryly.

"The same as you, I'd say!" she said with conviction, licking her lips seductively.

"You don't know what I want," I countered.

She stood up from the bed and walked towards me with swaying steps.

I rolled my eyes in annoyance and crossed my arms in front of my chest.

"You know very well that doesn't work with me!" I said condescendingly, which only seemed to spur her on even more.

Her eyes sparkled proudly. She came closer and closer and finally leaned against me. Grabbed the towel ends that hung over my shoulders and pulled me down to her face.

"Before you run the risk of being slaughtered by the wolves, you want to experience it again! With me! With your Bella!" she whispered beguilingly.

Carlisle had told me the previous night what explanation he had offered our family to explain my destruction.

She was not sure how determined the wolves were and wanted to take advantage of the possible last chance. In her opinion, my imminent destruction should be enough to get me involved with her again.

"Don't you ever dare say her name again!" I hissed and grabbed her wrists. "And leave me the hell alone!" I added and pushed her away from me.

"You want me ... because I look like Bella!" she continued to argue, not without making it sound seductive, and stood in front of me again - with her hands on my bare chest.

With a resounding slap, she flew across the room.

I had warned her.

She held her cheek covered with cracks and now looked doubtfully in my direction.

She did not give up yet, but considered the next step.

In a flash I was at her, grabbed her by the throat and dragged her across the floor.

She tried to free herself from my grip, realized that this was futile and looked at me fearfully.

Real fear! The strength of a newborn had finally gone out in her.

"This is my last warning, Samantha. Next time I'll destroy you!" I said clearly and pushed her down my stairs.

"You wouldn't dare!" she muttered on the landing and picked herself up.

"You want to find out?" I growled.

Samantha promptly began her retreat and I laughed when she finally disappeared through my front door.

How long would this threat last?

I got dressed, grabbed my stuff, and went to Carlisle, who by now - 4:39 a.m. - was in his study.

He was not only the only one who knew about Bella, he was also the only one who knew exactly how Samantha behaved towards me. Samantha, who always showed herself to be extremely charming and exceptionally polite to everyone, was really clever and cunning in this respect, so no one ever noticed her constant provocations or lewd remarks. Only Carlisle had some doubts about Samantha's sincerity in the meantime, though he did not say how these concerns had come about. He had therefore asked me to inform him about Samantha's behavior, but so far it had really only been annoying. Something like earlier had never happened before.

"How are you?" he then asked once our conversation became more relaxed.

I closed my eyes for a moment and immediately had Bella in my head.

The way she had looked at me earlier when I put her to bed. Her eyes were shining.

I already noticed how the joyful smile that I had seen, with disbelief, in my mirror earlier came back to my face.

"I withdraw the question," he realized the answer to his question himself and smiled just as happily.

"I think she's letting me live," I confirmed his guess.

"I didn't expect anything else from her. Say hello to her for me," he gave me to understand. He could hardly wait to see Bella.

I also yet went to Esmé and chatted with her - she kept wondering where my good mood came from - before finally running towards Saco.

At 5:36 a.m., I was again standing in Bella's hallway, eavesdropping.

All three were still asleep, one heart quieter than the other. I went into the kitchen, turned on the coffee maker and waited patiently. Then I took three cups from the cupboard and went upstairs.

Leah was the first to get restless and I could already hear her alarm clock ringing.

She cursed that the night was already over.

Quietly I knocked on her door.

"Yes!" she scolded, and I ducked inwardly before entering.

Sleep-deprived teenagers were dangerous creatures and unpredictable. I had read that in a magazine once.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, startled, instinctively pulling her bedspread over her.

"Good morning. Coffee?" I asked quietly.

She snatched the cup from my hand and burned her tongue with her first sip. Still, she continued to drink greedily.

I smirked.

While she was drinking, I told her how I had run into Jake last night and had then thought that I could wake them all up with coffee. After all, we had already discussed yesterday before the movies that I would take her and Jake to school.

"That's ... nice of you. Thank you," she said softly, eyeing me. She considered whether I had come up with this idea just so I could be with her mom sooner. She found the thought sweet.

"I was happy to do it ... And you're right," I replied sincerely.

"Next time with a spoonful of sugar, please," she carped yet laughed behind me as I left her room.

I would keep in mind.

Then I went to Jake, who had already woken up by himself.

Again, I knocked softly and was received a bit friendlier.

He was already sitting sideways on his bed. Tiredly leaning against the wall, he held his cell phone in his hand and waited, offended, for it to ring at any moment.

"Morning. You're still here," he noted sleepily and snatched the cup from my hand as well.

"Nope, back again. I just got here," I corrected.

"One can get used to this," he grinned at me, pointing to the cup.

5:58 a.m.

I went to Bella ... with the last cup in my hand.

I intentionally left the door open behind me. After all, I was only a guest here. I had no right to unrestricted togetherness with Bella.

She was lying across the bed and somehow tangled up in her blanket.

What on earth had she done last night?

I knelt in front of the bed and put the cup down on the nightstand. I turned off the alarm clock from her cell phone before it rang.

I thought I was a more pleasant alarm clock than a small cell phone, which could only make annoying beeps.

I leaned toward her a little.

How good she smelled. Therewith I would have to be awakened. Not with that awful coffee. What did people find in this strange bitter black water?

Gently, I stroked a few strands of hair from Bella's face and gave her a long kiss on the corner of her mouth. I smiled.

Her heart betrayed her even in her sleep and it became restless.

She began to wake up and I tenderly caressed her back of the neck with my fingertips.

"Good morning, Bella!" I whispered.

"Good morning ..." she gave a sleep-drugged reply, flinched a moment later, and straightened up. "... Edward?"

She was simply adorable. Just the way she was sitting there now. With a sleepy but frightened gaze, wildly disheveled hair, clutching the blanket around her. She looked at me in dismay ... the small crease appeared between her eyes ... she tried to recap last evening ... and realization flashed in her eyes. Her body relaxed.

"Coffee?", I offered, presenting her the cup from which a little steam was rising.

Not quite as greedy as her children, she took the cup from me, but blew on it first so it would cool a bit.

I put my hands around the porcelain.

She looked at me steadily, as if she didn't believe I was here. After a moment, she finally drank and seemed definitively convinced that she was awake.

Thank you for reading!