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Chapter 39

A Promise

Bella

"You ..." I started to curse, but I had so many spiteful words in me that I couldn't decide. I knew exactly which floorboard it was that the pictures of us would be hidden under. No idea how many times I was on the verge of ripping that pesky thing out. I was angry! At me! I had to vent my anger. Who was better suited for this than the one to whom I owed this anger!

I jumped on Edward's lap and hit him with clenched fists, knuckles, even sticking out my tongue. I could not get rid of many blows until he grabbed my wrists and held them.

"You'll pay for this!" I jokingly threatened while glaring at him.

I continued to squirm over him in case I could take advantage of a second of weakness. He chuckled in amusement, which only spurred me on more to hit him somehow.

I was far from ready to give up yet. I raged on blindly. Tried to free myself from his grip.

"Bella!" Edward all of a sudden shouted rather violently which startled me and I immediately stopped.

His laughter had vanished.

Had I done something wrong? I could hardly have hurt him, could I?

"Please ... stop ... yourself ... from ... moving ..." he said emphatically.

I was irritated. He didn't look angry. Kind of vulnerable, but not like he was hurt.

"Why?" I asked intimidated and slumped down a bit.

As I did so, I felt something beneath me that made me sigh comfortably. Only now I noticed that my bathrobe had opened more and more. I sat half naked on Edward! Exactly on Edward. His manhood pressed against me and it felt fantastic.

My hands were suddenly free, instead I noticed a stimulating pressure directly on the skin of my hips.

When was the last time I was touched like this by a man?

Our eyes met and over his liquid warm gold lay a dark veil.

What a gaze! I searched for the term that seemed to fit my feelings exactly. Restless. Moving. Heated ... Excited!

"If you go on like this, I'll forget my good upbringing!" he muttered, almost incomprehensibly.

Again, it twitched under me. More of it! I wanted more of this erotic tingle that I had not felt for so long. Had almost forgotten how it felt. Who needed a good upbringing these days!

I continued to move over him.

Instead of - as I assumed - pushing me gently but firmly away from him, Edward joined in the demanding movements of my pelvis and he kept building up under me more and more. He pulled me towards his body. It excited me how he pressed more and more against my middle and our lips met lustfully and passionately.

It tingled excitingly as his fingertips traveled up my spine and moments later, I felt his marble lips between my breasts. My hands clawed at him so that he would never leave my skin again. I was so hot that I thought I would burn and only his cool hands saved me from it. I moaned softly into myself while his tender fingers pushed the bathrobe over my shoulders. I pulled awkwardly at his T-shirt and immediately let my hands drive over the muscles of his chest.

Hard as granite. Cold as ice. And underneath, a heart that quivered.

I pushed him with his back on the sofa and began - starting from his neck - to kiss over this perfect torso, while his fingers lost themselves unrestrained in my hair. His hands slid back to my face and held it relatively rudely in his gaze.

"Bella?" he said with a tone I had never heard from him before.

Kind of hoarse. Somehow, I thought that was totally hot. But it sounded meaningful. It was over! That's all he would allow. I held absolutely still, admonishing my body that it would not get more. No matter how much I craved it. It was too dangerous in Edward's eyes.

"Do you really want that?" he asked seriously, his gaze wary.

"I have waited twenty years for you! I want you. Now!" I gasped. I love you. I want you. All of you. Forever! I thought even further, but neither my hectic breath nor the freedom of my lips was enough to speak.

At some point - I had no clue how much time had passed - I freed myself from his desirous lips and continued where he had interrupted me earlier. I kissed and caressed all over his marble skin, awkwardly freeing him from the rest of his clothes. With his jeans in my hand, I paused briefly, overwhelmed.

Wow ... The most beautiful man in the world. On my couch. Naked!

Before I remembered that I just had something in mind, except just to ogle over his body, Edward came closer to me again. With a gaze that promised me everything.

And I was not to be disappointed.

His hands, his lips, his tongue, his arms. He seemed to be everywhere on my skin. I trembled with erotic tension, moaning unconstrained, surrendering to his tireless caresses, while my own sensual pleasure continued to swell. Pretty much every spot of this flawless man I explored, stroking the marble skin under which he seemed to tremble, kissing and cuddling me from top to bottom and back again.

Again and again we looked at each other. Again and again we kissed. Again and again our hands roamed.

Edward took my mind and I didn't want it back. I reeled in the fog of desire and felt the fire reach its peak. I trembled all over, felt everything in me contract intoxicated, and let myself fall powerlessly against his soothing cold chest.

Wow ... Sex with a vampire! I was completely blown away. Had the earth moved for a moment?

I wasn't sure and held onto him with my eyes closed. His cool hands gently stroked over me and seemed to bring my agitated body to rest. My pulse and my breathing slowly calmed down. But in my heart, all hope of normality was gone anyway, as long as Edward was with me.

I blinked a few times and opened my eyes.

We were sitting on the floor. Leaning against the sofa? I chuckled softly. I hadn't even noticed.

But the more my delight eased, the more my thinking ability returned step by step.

How long would Edward stay with me? If he left, I would fall back into my abyss. My children could keep me from making horrible mistakes, but not from sliding over the edge. What reason would Edward have not to go? We had slept together and it had completely overwhelmed me. It seemed to seal our love for good. I was fallen for this man with body and soul. Just like in the past. I felt overjoyed if it wasn't for this little question. He had already left once. What if his reasons for doing so came back to him?

Edward just now gently lifted my head.

I detected still an enchanting smile on his lips before concern began to emerge on his face.

"Bella. Are you hurt?" he asked, shaken.

I smiled weakly.

But wait! Maybe I really should check that for a moment. His earlier fear was not taken out of thin air, after all. Earlier today my whole body had been so intertwined with his in the intoxication of love that I could not distinguish mine from his body.

I stretched a bit, moving my limbs. Nicely one body part at a time, whereby I carefully crawled off Edward. He followed my every move with a fearful gaze.

"Ouch ..." I actually cursed as I dropped down next to Edward.

Immediately, there was a look of guilt in his eyes. A guilt that he could never make up for.

I lifted my butt a little and saw a substantial purple bruise. But that was from yesterday, when I had fallen off the stool in front of the bookshelf. Other than that, I only had a slight mark on my forearm that definitely matched Edward's hand. It wouldn't even turn red, let alone blue, it was so minor. And it didn't really hurt either. My lips burned a little and felt swollen. But that was rather pleasant and made me realize that I hadn't imagined the last ... however much time it was.

"Nothing's hurt," I promptly assured him, shaking my head in conviction and briefly wondering myself where my hangover had gone, complete with headache.

Edward moved closer to me, put his arms around me and pulled my thigh slightly above him so that the bruise did not touch the floor. Gently his hand slid above and he smiled hesitantly at me.

I couldn't even tell HOW relieved he looked.

"I know you didn't get that from me. Still, I'm sorry, Bella. Please forgive me for not being there yesterday to save you from that," Edward asked for forgiveness anyway. "Otherwise, you are not hurt? I really haven't done anything to you?" he asked tenderly yet again.

"No, Edward. You didn't hurt me. Not really. I'm fine. I feel more alive than I have in twenty years!" I assured and kissed him, which he returned with feeling.

However, after my relief at my state of health subsided, my original question slowly overshadowed our get-together again.

"You didn't leave me without reason last time!" I now anxiously stated again and pushed Edward far enough away from me so that I could look at him.

A hand laid tenderly against my cheek.

"You're right. But none of my reasons still hold today," he said softly, kissing me lightly on the corner of the mouth.

What was different today from that time? "What reasons?" I therefore asked.

"I left because I had to deny you a perfect relationship for safety reasons and I couldn't give you everything I wished for you," Edward began to explain, stroking my cheek.

Wished for me? I had longed for only one thing and that was Edward.

Before I could voice my objection, Edward proceeded.

"A life with all the ups and also downs that make up a person. People grow from their experiences and adventures, whether they are good or bad, and through that they shape the person you are. Without the dangers of my world," he continued.

But I had been willing to take these risks. It was he, however, who had denied me entry into his world. His idea that I shouldn't miss out on any human experience had already gotten on my nerves back then. In what life would I have already gone to a school dance voluntarily?

"Jake and Leah," he added.

Again, before I could say anything. But now I didn't want to say anything.

Yes. My children. If Edward had stayed with me, Jake and Leah would not be alive today. The most important creatures in my life. My Valentine's gifts. From Jacob ... That had always been a serious reason for him back then. For him! Not for me! I had not wasted a thought on having my own children back then. I knew today, it was because I was too young. I could no longer imagine my life without my children today and the thought of it made my life seem pointless. Edward could not father children. He would have deprived me of that happiness if he had given in ...

This realization circled in my head. I briefly reviewed all the pain that his departure had caused me, without letting it take me over.

Against it stood the countless moments with my children. As babies and how they slowly grew up. The mischief they had gotten into, which mostly made me smile. When Leah got me a suitcase from the storage closet after I said, 'I'll move out before we get a dog.' Or when Jake came to my birthday with a beautiful bouquet of flowers and afterwards the neighbors complained to me because he had picked the flowers from their garden ...

Edward's decision to leave me had been the right one! ... No matter how much it hurt. All the sorrow was meaningless. Today was the right time for US!

I climbed back sideways onto Edward's lap and kissed him with abandon.

"Thank you!" I said honestly, glancing into his slightly confused, but very loving-looking eyes. "For leaving back then. For gifting me with it my children," I explained.

His arms pulled me tightly against his body.

"That was part of what I wished for you but could not fulfill. But I did not leave you that you might be alone. I can change that today," he mumbled, and at one point began to play with my hair with one hand and stroked over my back.

I chuckled after a moment as another little realization hit me.

"Did you ever think we'd be sitting there like this? Completely naked?" I asked him, backing up a bit with my upper body, bracing against the marble skin of his athletic chest.

"I'm not naked! ... I still have my socks on!" he contradicted, chuckling just as much. "But no. I wouldn't have ... I was always afraid of hurting you, but you know that," he added in a calmer tone, caressing along my sides.

"What changed?" I asked curiously.

"I do not like to say it ... but it was Samantha," he admitted.

A brief fearful shiver ran down my spine at the thought of Samantha. But she was dead!

"Hmmph ...!" however, I said with childish, feigned jealousy, freeing myself from his arms and sitting down next to him in a huff, turning away from him. I owed it to another woman. Great!

"Carlisle asked me a question Monday night, when I wasn't sure who you were, that I thought about at great length before I could see you again," he began to explain, while he gently stroked my shoulder and put my hair back.

"What kind of question?", I asked, sounding absolutely disinterested. In truth, I was burning for the answer. And trembled under his fingertips. And his cool lips brushing over my skin.

"Whether I am ready to do what you could ask me to do! ... It was basically a quite logical question, on which the answer determined whether I was allowed to see you again. Of course, I also thought about sex. Countless times I had to bring you to your senses back then and stop your hormones, since I was convinced that I could not control myself in the rush of emotions. But after Samantha, I then knew what to expect and believed I could control myself ... And lo and behold. You're still alive," he smiled at me and immediately covered my face with countless light kisses.

I felt slightly dizzy.

I forgot to complain that it wasn't always just my hormones. He himself had also had to pull himself together often enough.

"With you it was so exceedingly different from what I experienced with Samantha ... More beautiful than I can put into words. I think only now really live and understand life! How could I ever be without you for even a day ever again?" he spoke and my heart commented with a damn high jump that made Edward chuckle softly.

"So, what's the answer to Carlisle's question?" but I asked, because I hadn't heard a clear answer to that yet.

Edward broke away from me and turned me in his direction before kneeling on the floor right in front of me.

Naked as God created him.

My heart already stumbled again at this sight.

Devoutly, he took my hands in his and looked into my eyes with a soulful but meaningful gaze.

"You are everything to me, Bella. I promise you I will stay with you as long as you want me and I will do everything you ask me to do!" he swore, as if it was the most sacred of oaths, on whose observance his life depended.

"Everything?", I asked, completely flabbergasted, slumping back against the sofa.

"Everything!" he confirmed, raising an eyebrow briefly in challenge.

"All your money?"

"Give me your account number."

"Your cars?"

"The BMW stands out front, your kids have the Audi, and I can get the convertible for you later."

"Your house?"

"Do you want to move in there or just take it away from me?"

"Don't know yet. Is it important?" I asked indecisively.

"If you want to live there, I would ask if you wanted me to help you pack."

I considered for a moment.

These were all pretty material things that I basically didn't care about anyway. But something else had not occurred to me now so spontaneously.

"As long as I want it! Not as long as you think it's right!" I questioned mistrustfully, remembering the hospital in Phoenix.

"I'll stay with you, Bella, until you send me away! I won't think a second sooner about leaving you alone again!"

"What if one day you don't love me anymore?"

"That won't happen. Our kind only loses its heart once in its existence, and mine has already been yours for almost twenty years!"

"You'll be with me every day?"

"Where else would I be?"

"Every night?"

"If you'll allow me!"

"You'll keep hiding me from your family?" I was running out of questions ...

"As long as you want it."

"Sex?"

"Too late!" he crawled toward me.

We rolled hugging each other with our backs on the floor and kissed intimately.

Oh yes ... I almost forgot. This brief dialogue had catapulted me briefly almost twenty years into the past. When we discussed the rules for our being together at that time. Discussed was perhaps exaggerated. He had set the rules. It had been a little different in content, but the rapidity of his answers was the same. That time, a lot of it was about his behavior at school and in Charlie's presence. He had always been very careful not to portray our love too intimately to the outside world, so as not to arouse mistrust and appear tyrannical. After all, at that time he was also still afraid that I would suddenly disappear from the scene and that he was to blame for it. However, it occurred to me that it was absolutely NOT EVERYTHING that he would fulfill me.

"Will you change me?" I asked in a whisper, lowering my gaze.

I didn't want to look him in the eyes, thereby.

That had been his strongest argument in the past. My soul.

He raised my eyes again to his intense gaze of liquid gold that confused me a bit. He looked determined, but also affectionate. With a hint of anger. Deep down. At the bottom of HIS soul.

"Yes, Bella. I will do it. If you seriously ask me to," he replied. "But you won't. Not now ... You just want to find out how seriously I take my promise and whether I will keep at it. Be sure Bella: I have said 'everything' and I mean 'everything'. I will deny you absolutely nothing. Whatever you wish, I will fulfill it. Immortality or just a cup of coffee to get you up."

He had begun attentively and now ended with a hearty laugh.

He had caught me. I did not wish for immortality. My life was beautiful as it was. Especially now, with Edward by my side. But his word that he would do it made any last doubts about his honesty crumble into dust. I was allowed to be happy. Completely happy and let me lay back on the sofa kissing, accompanied by strong cold arms and then a cool body leaning against the side of me.

"There is something you will never allow me to do, though!" but I still laughed at him.

Doubtingly he looked towards me.

"You're not going to take me with you when you go hunting," I continued laughing.

His expression hardened immediately, the gold of his eyes became cold and hard and in them stood shock, fear and despair.

I took his face in my hands and kissed over his skin.

Gently I spoke to him that I knew he wouldn't do that, that I would never ask that, that I loved him. Even if there was now nevertheless a small restriction, which I respected. I was not tired of life!

It took time for him to relax again.

"You're right," he ultimately admitted sullenly, seemingly pissed off that it wasn't EVERYTHING after all.

"You realize that your promise means you're staying forever?" I clarified at one point, stroking over his cold arms.

"That's how it was intended!" he stated and breathed a kiss on my lips. "But I'm worried ... What about your friends?", then he asked attentively.

"What about them?"

"I'm seventeen and you're a grown woman," he said.

I nodded weakly.

Since Wednesday, the age difference was already buzzing around in my head. I had repressed my feelings because of it and dismissed them as silly. That his appearance had simply thrown me mentally into the past.

I stroked over his angelic face with my fingertips.

I could not do anything about my love. Love knows no age difference.

"I love you, Edward, and I won't give you away again because some people are the opinion that our love is wrong. If my friends have a problem with that, they're not worth being my friends," I replied with conviction, not wanting to worry about such trivialities today.

He nodded and immediately kissed me.

"You're beautiful, Bella," Edward whispered devotedly, driving his tingling fingertips over my stomach and along my sides.

I felt my cheeks heating up.

"And so even more so," he teased, kissing my undoubtedly obvious reddening. "What do you want to do today?" he then asked, probably to distract me from my blush.

"What is there to choose from?" I asked, thoughtfully.

"The sun is shining. That limits my options a bit ... A walk through the forest. I could read you something. A drive in your new car. Stay lying here ..." he began to enumerate and I stopped listening further.

Mmm ... Stay lying here was really a tempting offer, which I would agree to. I felt so comfortable in his arms. Nothing and no one would bother us today and I had so many years to make up for with Edward. But I had another idea.

"How about we drive to your place?" I suggested, purposely skipping the reference to MY new car. He would not be so easily dissuaded from this fixed idea and today I did not want to argue with Edward. "I would like to see Esmé and Carlisle again. And also the others."

"They'll be thrilled to see you," he smiled at me. "But I guess I should give you a heads up," he considered, and I gave him a questioning look. "Alice is determined to hate you!"

"Why? What have I done?" I asked, startled.

"They all know, or think they know, that I'm in love with Jake and Leah's mother. But none of them know that you are her."

"So?"

"Alice will loathe to the core any woman I'm interested in who isn't you. The others are just curious to see which woman managed to distract me from you."

I considered that.

Should I be angry with Alice now because she made her judgment before she knew me? Or should I be grateful to her because she wanted to keep the place at Edward's side for me?

But these brief thoughts caused me to pause.

If they were all so curious, however, Alice would surely keep an eye on Edward with her stupid gift. Shouldn't Alice have seen me already? Maybe even right now?

Involuntarily, I reached for my bathrobe and asked Edward about it. But Alice was apparently blind to me and my children.

"You will probably be a little surprised," I noted to myself, chuckling, and let the bathrobe drop back onto the floor.

"I would assume that you're understating thereby. This will be the shock of her life so far," Edward laughed, satisfied and pulled me again towards his greedy lips.

My own were no less and our hands began to wander.

"Your children are coming back," Edward interrupted our further caresses after far too short a time.

I was startled.

"What time is it then?" I asked in amazement, not yet breathing evenly again. I had by now noted with disapproval that the time with Edward was passing too quickly, but it couldn't be that late in the day.

"Only eleven o'clock in the morning. But you wanted to stay at the lake until this evening," Edward also wondered.

Something had to have gone wrong and I could see in Edward's face that he was concentrating.

"Leah is crying ... Ben broke up with her ..." Edward explained sympathetically. "... And they're driving up the driveway any moment now," he added, with which we both became frantic.

He gave me a quick kiss, pushed me off him, immediately stood in front of me dressed and held my bathrobe out to me.

I was a bit taken off guard by this speed. My head was still considering what to do first.

"Would you rather greet your children like this?" he asked with a smirk, making a dissolute gesture over my body.

My naked body.

I blushed, but stood up and Edward helped me into the bathrobe, pulling me backwards against him and putting his arms around me.

"What do my kids think of you anyway?" it just occurred to me and I turned to him. I was a little unsure what to say to my kids or how to act towards them regarding Edward. They had not been satisfied with my last date and now I was with a vampire. I still had the shocked faces of the two very clearly before eyes, when I had told them last week that I was once ready to follow Edward into eternity.

He smirked.

"You'd be surprised! But I won't tell you their thoughts," he teased me.

I staggered a bit as he moved away from me in lightning speed to clean up my abyss of yesterday. I quickly went to the table and slipped the bracelets and Billy's letter into the pocket of the bathrobe.

If Ben had broken up with her, he might not have been able to cope with the truth about my two wolves. The bracelet would then aggravate Leah's mood.

I hadn't really finished thinking through everything when the front door opened as well and Leah threw herself into my arms, crying.

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