A/N: Still alive, so I suppose that's a good thing?
Quick question! Should I update the next two days? I know its the Super Bowl and all, but then we've got Valentines Day after that...
...not sure. Thoughts? Unless folks want me to, I probably won't...
Just a warning, this chapter gets a bit intense.
As ever the Embers rule persists, reviews are my fuel, my fire, my life.
Without them, I lose all inspiration, all hope, all ability to write. That's no joke. I have so little time to write these days with two jobs, and silence hurts. So by all means, speak up! Make yourselves heard! Every bit of feedback, no matter how small or large, matters! Really, it helps a lot. Its a joy to talk with you all and bandy ideas back and forth; it really is. Sorry if this seems shorter than usual, working on a tight schedule here.
Now, lets answer your burning questions, comments, and concerns:
Q: Team CRSN is a go?
A: Eventually...once the letter N comes around. Now, wherever could she be?.
Still, The kids are in their element this chapter; I had a right and proper blast writing them.
Q: Don't give Little!Roman his signature outfit yet! Neo makes it for him! Don't ye dare ruin that!
A: Rest assured I am aware of the origins of his outfit; just as I am aware of her awful father and mother.
*loads shotgun with religious intent*
Q: Where did James go?! Did you write him out of the story?!
A: Nay! He can hardly come to Menagerie now, can he? The faunus would go berserk. Truth be told, Ironwood hasn't really had his chance to shine in this story, if only because his arc hasn't come and Naruto hasn't interacted with him overmuch. At this point James is still a Captain, not a general. He doesn't control the military or Atlas Academy...yet.
Time will tell if he becomes the hero he was always meant to be...or something worse.
Rest assured, he'll actually have some depth to him...once Naruto sits him down for a talk.
Q: Where is Salem and what is she up to?
A: At this point, she's playing the long game. Her forces have been drastically weakened in this story. Cinder's with Naruto, Watts never betrayed Atlas, Hazel is -presently!- imprisoned and Tyrian...well. I'll not say about Tyrian.
Unfortunately this makes her far more dangerous and unpredictable; if only because we don't know what she'll do next.
Naruto really ought to take her seriously, but he doesn't truly know about her thanks to Ozpin.
Bloody Oz and his bloody secrets...
Q: Are you following canon, or have things diverged?
A: Oi! I thought that was obvious by now!
Q: Why do you write RWBY so much?!
A: ...because its fun?
Q: Are pairings starting to form?
A: In a sense. Can't really clarify for fear of spoiling things. Still, I've made my choice and it'll be revealed down the line.
Q: Good sir, I must demand that you not nerf Naruto.
A: None of that here. Even down an arm, he's strong as ever. Heck, even stronger thanks to-
Oops! Almost spoiled things.
Q: Penny when!
A: PENNY SOON! That's all I'll say.
Alma's gonna love having a sister around.
Alright then, I think I've kept you waiting long enough.
As ever, I own noooo references, quotes, memes or themes.
Not a wit or a one. Ought to be reeeaaally bloody obvious by now.
And yes, I went there with that title, its a big honking references, though I'll not say to who!
"Neo, if there's one thing I've learned in life, its to respect the pecking order.
Respect it, fear it, dread it...and don't hesitate to overthrow it the first chance you get.
After all, if I'd been satisfied with that shitty life in Mistral, we never woulda met. No Team CRSN. No nothing.
Hmm? What's that? Finish the story? Sure. Now where I was I? Right, right, so anyway, the Boss dragged me back to his ship, and from there...
~Torcwhick (Future).
Pecking Order
Roman considered himself a lucky lad.
Pretty damn lucky if you asked him. He'd been in the right place at the right time, bumbled into one miracle stacked atop another. Said miracle had taken one look at him and done the unthinkable. Rather than spit on him like everyone else, that "miracle" slapped him hard on the back, took him by the shoulders, and steered him in another direction. Really, what were the chances? Slim to none, that's what!
Against all odds, he'd beaten the well...odds.
Everyone knew ya didn't mess with a Schnee. It just wasn't done. Proper common sense, that. When he'd first found the big bastard glowering down at him he thought it was all over. Most posh types didn't take kindly to stowaways. He'd braced himself for a beating or worse, a few broken bones.
.
..
...for once, lady luck had smiled upon him.
Now here he sat in a private Schnee aircraft; freshly showered, wrapped in brand new clothes, his belly full, and cautiously optimistic for the future. Clad in crisp black trousers, grey shoes, and pale blue shirt over which he'd thrown a deep navy overcoat -Atlas and Schnee colors, ha!- he felt more alive than he had in months. Years, even. Granted, it would probably come out of his hide later, but for now? He intended to milk this moment down to the very last drop.
This was the life! You knew it was luxury when everyone on the ship had their own cabin in a giant ship!
Now to be fair, Roman was admittedly a stranger to the lap of luxury-having spent most of his life living in the gutter and whatnot. Stealing from the gangs in Mistral had netted him the occasional windfall here and there, but if this was what he'd been missing out on...well! Maybe it was time to hit some higher profile targets in the future.
Not this lot, though. He knew the pecking order.
Crossing one leg over the other, he kicked up his legs and leaned back in his chair with a pleased sigh. Even if this gig didn't work out, he'd gotten away from Mistral. Granted he didn't rightly know where they were going -the adults were being awfully cagey about that- but as far as he was concerned, anywhere would be better than his home kingdom and the gangs that sought his life. Mistral gangsters were nasty. Another day there and they would've strung him up like a scarecrow.
But now he could die happy. Assuming they decided to kill him. Hey! This could be some weird cult for all he knew! Might as well savor this while it lasted.
"Are you enjoying yourself, Roman?"
Just like that, his joy became so much ash in his mouth. Right. Forgot about her..
Everyone did indeed have their own private cabin on the Schnee vessel. Aaaaand therein lay the rub.
This was Cinder's cabin.
Reclining languidly in the seat opposite hiss, Cinder Schnee looked nothing short of smug. She had every right to be; it was her word that had seen him brought aboard, her advice that gave him these dapper new clothes, and probably her word that would see him thrown right out again if he misbehaved.
Yessir, she had him by the balls and they both knew it.
"So we've got a C and an R with an S." Sienna counted on her fingers in the seat across from him, focused on something he couldn't quite understand; the sight of which ruthlessly roused his curiosity and tugged him back to reality. "All we need now is an N and we'd have team CRSN."
Roman blinked. An unpleasant feeling bloomed in his stomach. "Kitty-kat say what now?"
"Crimson." Cinder smacked her lips, as though tasting the word, running it over his tongue. "I like the sound of that."
Roman didn't! "Don't I get a say in this?"
"No." came their united reply. "You certainly do not."
The up-and-coming-crimnal-mastermind winced. Cinder was deadly alright; dangerous, destructive, diabolical...an' a bunch of other words that started with D. Still, she was clearly the boss's kid and he wasn't about to tread on her toes. Nope. No fool he. She had spoken up for him, which meant she wanted something from him. So long as she did, she wouldn't discard him.
"Right," he smacked his lips. "So you want me to be on this kickass team of yours? Ain't we a little young for that sorta thing?"
"Come now," Cinder tutted, dragging out each word. "Don't use such strong words. It makes you look weak."
Weak. Right, sure.
He had no illusions as to where he stood here. She'd burn his bits off.
But that Faunus girl, Sienna? She was right up his alley. She had that rough and tumble look about her, as much bite as she was bark. He didn't much care about her ears one way or the other. Faunus were Faunus, just as humans were humans. He'd suffered both good and bad experiences alike at their hands.
At the end of the day, didn't everyone have a right to be free?
"Tell me about yourself, Roman."
Crapbaskets, the fire witch was looking at him again. Better answer. As he looked on she sat down in one of the many padded chairs, crossed a leg over the other, and poured herself a tall glass. She raised to her lips and drank languidly, sipping from it like some fine wine.
Roman felt his lips twitch. Must not laugh. Laughter would be his doom.
He knew it was juice; because the boss had said as much when he'd brought the damn pitcher in an hour ago. Heh. Little miss Cinder wanted to act like a grown up, did she? Fine. He could play to that. That was an admirable posture she had there, but he could see the flaws in it. Cinder Schnee held herself well, but a child just couldn't pull off certain things, neither could she. There were flaws in her posture; she sat just a tad too rigid, and there was a gleam of heat in those lively golden eyes that betrayed the calm she was trying to project.
A snicker stirred in him. He bit the laugh down.
All in all, it made him think of a little girl playing dresses up in her mother's closet; a child pretending to be the woman she wasn't. Back in Mistral he would've scoffed, flipped her off, and told her to go to hell. But she had swords with her, and probably knew how to use 'em. He didn't have a weapon. And Sienna was staring at him.
So he'd play her game. For now.
There was no need to feign a grin; charm came to him naturally even as a boy.
"Not much to tell." still smiling accepted the offered glass from her and drank. Huh. Raspberry. Or was that an indirect kiss? Meh, he'd worry about cooties later. "I'm a street rat, same as your friend over there."
"I gathered as much." with her hands unoccupied, Cinder was free to steeple her fingers. "You certainly made your fair share of enemies back in Mistral."
What was this, an interrogation or something?
"Never got caught, though." he felt the need to clarify that point.
"No," she allowed. "You didn't. If you had, we wouldn't be having this conversation."
Sienna's right ear twitched atop her head. Her smile startled him. "You're right, Cinder. He's got spirit. I like him."
"Doesn't he?" Cinder's smile? Yeah, it was all teeth. Yikes.
That bad feeling he had? It just intensified. Sixfold.
The pair -sisters?- shared an indulgent look with one another and giggled.
These two would be absolutely terrifying when they grew up. When. Not if. It was only a matter of time-they were already well on their way. Give 'em a few years to master their craft or so, time to truly come into their own, and they'd be...well. For a wild moment his imagination ran away from him. It wasn't hard. They were pretty girls, and someday, they'd be beautiful women.
"You're staring, Roman."
"No idea what you're talkin' about. Anyway, Sweet gig you got here." He hauled his thoughts back before he went and said something stupid as he kicked up his feet onto a table. "What's a guy like me gotta do to get in on this?"
Sienna saw no reason to lie to him. "Mug a Schnee."
Ha! As if she'd survive that. "Very funny."
The silence was telling.
"To be fair," Cinder curled a long strand of dark hair around her finger and looked away as she spoke; it was the first human expression he'd seen from her all day. "I was starving at the time and had little in the way of options.
"Really?" Roman glimpsed the deadpan honesty in her eyes and gave a low whistle. "Holy shit. You actually did that?" when she winced he dared to press the advantage. "Where ya from? Atlas, then?"
"Mistral, originally." her lips pursed into a thin line. "I grew up in an orphanage before being...taken to Atlas and later escaped my captors by fleeing into Mantle. Father found me there."
Mistral?! Roman's brow shot into his hair. She was from the streets, too?! That elevated his opinion of her somewhat. She'd done well to hide her accent.
"Its a shame we couldn't stay in Mistral longer." A dark gleam passed through her eye. "I still need to burn down that orphanage for selling me...
Yup, the fear was back. And it brought friends. "Riiiiight. I'm not in this for the long haul, though."
Sienna favored him with a long look. "Neither was I, at first. You'll come around."
Cinder thumbed her chin. "Father did say I needed minions...
"Pretty sure he meant friends there, Cindy."
Her smile was telling. "I know what I said, Roman."
Right, this one was clearly a few sticks short of a campfire! Time to steer this conversation to safer waters.
"Sooo," he drawled, reaching for a nearby plate of biscuits, "Any idea where we're headed? The Boss wouldn't say."
Cinder and Sienna shared an awkward glance. The former shrugged, but come the end, it was the latter who told him what he wanted to know.
Roman immediately wished they hadn't.
Menagerie?!
Oh gods, that would be worst than Mistral. As a kid, he didn't hold a particular grudge against the Faunus, but he'd probably be the only human on the island. That wouldn't end well. Not a chance in hell. He couldn't jump ship there. He'd be eaten alive if he was lucky.
"Any, ah," he gulped to hide his anxiety, "Particular reason we're headed there?"
The girls shared another long, lingering look between themselves. This time they didn't answer him.
"Will you be staying with us for the time being, then?" Cinder's smug smile returned tenfold. "After all, there's safety in numbers."
Blast it! She had him. In hindsight, it probably wasn't a wise choice to align his fate with theirs. Only a madman would shackle himself to a maniac. But what choice did he have? Sure she might see him as little more than a mere minion now, but that could change. No! It would change. Sienna had clearly worked her way into Cindy's good graces. He'd do the same. No, he'd go even higher. She might have saved him, but she wasn't pulling the strings around here. That was the Schnee. More aptly, her parents. Shouldn't be too hard to befriend the Mister and Missus.
Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.
Roman kicked up his legs, grinning fit to burst.
"Cinder, I think you and I are gonna get along just fiiiiine...
(.0.0.0.)
"You really are incorrigible, you know that?"
"Am I?" Naruto made a point of not looking at Willow while he worked on his shinobi prosthetic. "I was under the impression you'd be happy about this."
Safely refueled and with little in the way of turbulence for once, they'd finally had a chance to settle both themselves and their stomachs alike during the flight. Sprawled out in their private cabin, they were able to lounge in bed almost comfortably. Well, as comfortable as Willow could be these days. Personally, he finally felt at his ease for the first time since they'd set out.
Evidently, Willow agreed...which worried him.
"I am." Her fingers began to stroke his real arm with infinite care, nails tracing tiny circles against the back of his hand. "Delighted, really. Aren't you?"
It was terribly distracting; least of all because they weren't wearing clothes beneath the sheets. She was insatiable as ever. Still, he tried to focus. He really, truly did. It became...somewhat difficult when her hand drifted lower. He felt that pale hand trail down his chest, dancing across his ribs...
"Oi!" he battered her palm aside. "I'm trying to finish this upgrade."
"Alright." she agreed far too easily. "I'll wait."
Silence stretched between them as he patched another wire, carefully welding it to a dust fuse. This latest attachment would prove a nasty surprise for his enemies...aaaand Willow was still staring at him. Head in her hands, chin propped up by her palms...just looking right at him.
His patience lasted all of minute. "You're up to something."
When she didn't respond verbally he snapped the panel in his arm shut, reached around and pulled her into his lap. Her back kissed his chest as his arms encircled her. Pale blue sheets pooled around her, preserving her modesty, but only just. She settled in with a pleased coo, looked over her shoulder and touched a hand to her bosom as she smiled at him. She leaned up to kiss him then; he took a moment to savor it. Not so the smirk she wore.
That smile was smug! Nothing short of smug!
"Me?" she batted her eyes at him. "Up to something? Whatever do you mean?"
"Willow," his brow furrowed, "I mean it. What're you up to and why do I have a bad feeling about-ack!"
A gasp tore out of him when her rear ground against him; kindling a spark of desire to life in his chest. Blasted temptress! They'd only just laid together. He stamped down on it, refusing to be distracted and held her still before she could torment him further.
"Spoilsport." she hummed. "I just wanted to say you have good taste. After all, Roman is such a darling boy." She bulled on, ignoring the confused sound he made. "So bright, so eager, so determined to make his way in the world. Doesn't he remind you of someone?"
Kurama made a point of not responding, the sleepy bastard. Even so, Naruto felt a flash of amusement from his old friend.
Ahhhh. So that was her angle. He knew that tone. "Willow, no."
"Willow, yes!" Quick as can be, she pivoted in his lap and pushed him down to the mattress. He tried to surge up, only for her to spread her legs on either side of him, all but straddling him with her hips; practically pinning him where he lay. He could have broken free at any time...but he didn't want to. Not with the sight before him.
Would you?!
Framed in the light of the window, Willow almost seemed to glow. Wisps of long pale hair barely obscured the generous swell of her breasts, hinting at what lay beneath. She ran a hand down her belly, and once more, his eyes were drawn to the noticeable bulge there, their child within. Not for the first time, he wondered how he'd gotten so damn lucky.
Gotta marry her. His brain bleated. Soon as I find the right gemstone...and figure out how to craft a ring...
"You saved that boy." she smiled down at him, even as her eyes burned with pale maiden fire. "Are you really going to cast him aside?"
He looked away, heat rising in his cheeks. "We're just giving him a lift to Menagerie. That's all."
"And then what will you do, hmm?" her point gained, Willow leaned forward and pressing her forehead to his. "Did you even consider it?" This close, he could feel the heat from the flames ebbing out of her eyes, a gentle yet powerful warmth. "How do you expect that boy, a human boy, to survive on an island filled with Faunus?"
...blast. He hadn't thought of that.
"He'll be on his own," every word was a knife in his conscience, "With no one to look after him, not a lien to his name."
"Roman's tough." he muttered aside, not wanting to admit his mistake. "He'll find a way."
"That may well be," Her hand moved to his chest, light as a feather's brush. "But are you truly satisfied with simply letting that happen?"
She always saw through to the heart of him, even when he didn't want her to.
"We can always give him some lien-ow!" his words piqued into a hiss when she pinched one of his scars. "You're going to be difficult about this, aren't you?"
She smiled then, a faint dimpling of her cheeks. "Would you have my any other way?"
He considered it for a poignant moment. "Nope. I can't just...adopt him, y'know."
"Cinder and Sienna once thought the same. They turned out rather nicely."
"Well, Winter's certainly going to grow up well-protected...
Willow didn't respond to that. Instead she tilted her head just so, pale tresses concealing a burning iris. Then she leaned down and kissed him then, mouth moving against his. With their argument behind them, his blood began to warm once more. He reached up, linked both arms around her waist to hold her fast. She made a pleased noise at that and began to move against him, hips undulating in slow, rhythmic movements.
Half-lidded eyes leered at him in thinly veiled pleasure. "What's wrong, beloved?"
"Nothing." he pulled her down to him. "Nothing at all."
Time blurred into bliss.
(.0.0.0.)
Summer's face burned rose red.
Her fist paused, poised just short of knocking.
Because she could hear the two of them through the door.
Every bit of it. Everything. Even so, her fingers twitched toward the handle.
"Gah! What am I doing?!" she swore and marched the other way, ears burning. "I'll come back later~!"
(.0.0.0.)
A knock echoed on the cabin door.
Naruto creaked an eye open with a weary sigh.
"The world better be ending, or your life certainly will be...!"
In all fairness, he wasn't sure when one moment blended into the next; only that he'd woken to find himself pleasantly sore; Willow in his arms, nestled against him. How much time had passed? He didn't know, and didn't care at that...but he did care about that infernal knocking! Cease, already!
The latch twisted and Pietro poked his head in before he could think to cry out.
"Oh!" He saw the two of them and sputtered, dark face burning red. "We didn't mean to-
"Stand aside!" Watts shouldered his way in after him, saw them, and rolled his eyes. "Good. You're awake. We need a word."
Naruto perked up, daring to hope. "Is she ready?"
Pietro granted him a grim grin.
"Come and see."
(.0.0.0.)
Words couldn't begin to describe Menagerie.
Sandy and sunny just felt...inadequate to Naruto, somehow. The island was larger than he'd thought it would be, but it was just so vibrant, so very alive, that he fond himself taken aback for a moment as he strode down the ramp. More than a few Faunus lingered near the landing zone, each clamoring to get a look at him. Them. No doubt they noticed his entourage.
Willow's hand tightened around his. She wasn't letting go. Not for anything. Couldn't blame her.
That said, Alma surmised his feelings for the island quite nicely. "Pretty!"
Willow tutted once. "I prefer the term quaint...
Alma released her hand and danced back, face alight with joy.
"Oh, I see! Is this what they call a vacation?"
Willow smiled. "In a sense, dear."
...best auntie ever!"
"Wow." Raven muttered behind him. "Look at all those people. crowd-ow!" He heard her hiss as Qrow elbowed her. "What was that for?!
Cinder looked around, pausing to appreciate the scenery in turn. "We should vacation here sometime."
Roman tucked down his hat and grumbled. "Lets not and say we did, yeah?"
Tai chortled a little and nudged her on. "Move along, runts...
Summer didn't say a word, though her silver eyes flicked his way. Naruto couldn't help but frown a little. Had something happened...?
By contrast, the Faunus of their party proved almost melancholic; Sienna didn't look much pleased to be here; Kali and Ghira even less so. They slunk behind Team STRQ, looking like they expected an attack at any given moment. Not unsurprising after what they'd been through. Hunters they were not; Raven and Tai could only impart so much knowledge in such a short time. Still, the crowds before didn't appear dangerous-and while a good number of them radiated negativity, much of that was directed his way.
Small wonder Watts and Pietro wanted to remain aboard the ship. Their little...surprise would come later, if it came to that. Maybe this would work out after all...?
Naruto made it all of two steps down the ramp before the assault came.
"Welcome to Menagerie!" a pale man clad in white attire all but flung himself out of the crowd and grabbed him, hands snaking out to grasp his. "My lord!" he had time enough to behold dark hair and wide golden eyes before his arm was shook like a chew toy. "Its such a pleasure to finally meet you face to face!"
Naruto shrank back, somewhat startled. "Hey! And you are...?"
"Why, good sir! My name is Tyrian!" pale hands pumped his, continuing to his right arm up and down in a merry handshake. "Please excuse the nonbelievers on the island." he whispered aside. "They don't understand your godly glory." Just as quickly he turned his head and spat. "You have but to say the word and the faithful will see them put to the sword."
Kurama exploded into laughter. "I knew it! You started a cult!"
...why do you think I'm a god?"
"My lord," the man blinked, "what else can you be? No one can do the things you do!"
Willow made angry Willow noises through her teeth. "You must be joking...!
Raven cackled somewhere behind him. "You deserve this."
"Birdie, I swear, I will start plucking your feathers."
"That an invitation to fuck me or something?"
Summer slapped her back. "Language!"
Naruto flung up his arms. "Will some tell me what's goin on here?!"
The "devotee" was all too happy to do so.
"Right this way, my lord!" he bowed deeply at the waist, sweeping an arm before his lanky body. "Your tournament awaits in the center square, and the Chieftain with it! Let us bathe in the blood of the nonbelievers!"
"Hmm?" Cinder made a tiny pleased noise in his direction. "Now you, I like."
"Glorious! Tyrian cooed. "The child of our God has blessed me!"
Naruto slapped his forehead. "For crying out loud...!
A/N: Once again! Should I update the next two days? I know its the Super Bowl and all, but then we've got Valentines Day after that...
...not sure. Thoughts? Unless folks want me to, I probably won't...
And here we go. Tournament arc begins.
As ever, reviews are the fuel that keeps me writing. That's no joke. I'm sorry the chapters are shorter, but silences hurts more than any flame...
Without them, I can't write a single world. Seriously! So speak up! Every word -and every review!- really does matter!
So in the Immortal Words of Atlas...
...Review, Would You Kindly?
And enjoy the previews.
Potential ones...
...but still!
As ever!
WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!
SPOILERS AHOY!
BEWARE!
(Previews)
Next time: Fear is a Sure Bet.
Barely two words in and you already look like you want me dead. You're getting all worked up over nothing."
"You've changed, Naruto. You're getting weak.
"Oh, the pain!" he coughed up blood, even as he bled from his nose and ears. "It hurts so bad! It hurts it hurts IT HURTS! It feels like I'm dying!"
A fist swung out, obliterating a building as he screamed to the heavens. Rubble crumbled to the floor, obscuring him for a moment. An instant. Nothing more.
And then he was upon them.
Furious red eyes filled them vision.
"Here." Firm hands closed on either side of their face. "Let me show you what it feels like!"
EDIT: Aaaand this is why you don't push Naruto.
"Next round, bring it on!"
...you know, sometimes I think people actually want to see cruelty. They want to be barbaric. To give into their desires, and set their hearts ablaze. Peace can be such a wonderful thing. I cherish it with all my heart; I'd gladly give my life for it. But apparently something about it is lacking. Losing touch with life and death, perhaps? Way I see it, we oughta live like this might be the last day we've got. That's the only proper state of mind for living things. I'm ready to accept it when that day comes for me; because I've faced this cruel world head on and deepened my understanding of it.
Hmm? What's that? Do I feel remorse? Of course I do. I'm a father, a lover, a brother.
I'll fight tooth and nail to protect those dear to me, just like you would.
So let me give you a warning, from one survivor to another.
Throw down your weapons and surrender. Right. Now.
Because if you don't...you'll regret it."
"Brave of you boy, but foolish. I thought you would've learned your lesson."
"I've always been a slow learner."
"Get back here, you!"
A hand clamped down on her shoulder.
Alma tilted her head just so. "You are being rude. Release me."
"Hell no! You're our hostage-
Her attacker evaporated into a fine, bloody mist. She looked down. Blinked. "Oh dear, my dress is ruined...
EDIT: Once more, it seems folks aren't happy with the length of recent chapters, judging by the flames.
I only have so much time to write these days, I'm sorry I'm letting everyone down T_T
As ever, reviews are my fuel, my fire, my life.
Without them, I lose all inspiration, all hope, all ability to write.
That's no joke.
...
...
...really, it isn't.
R&R~!