Sara was just standing there staring at the blanket…picturing the crime scene..Envisioning and reenacting it all in her head. Grissom walks by and sees Sara just staring at the blood stained blanket…he approaches her and asks "are you checking up on my work." Sara just continues to stare and shares her thoughts of what the blanket was really telling her. She then describes the scene and walks toward the blanket and turns to Grissom and says "pin me down". Grissom surprised by the comment knew she wanted to replay the scene to give more of a visual of what really happened. What she didn't know was what those words meant to Grissom. The thought of touching Sarah even if just to reenact made he nervous. He feared the feelings he would have..
There has always been sexual tension between the two of them and now he was put in a position that he couldn't get out of. He did what she asked and Sara avoided all eye contact as much as she could. Grissom just found himself staring at Sarah and basically doing what ever she had asked. Oh what he would do just to pretend he wasn't her boss and just be with her on a more personal level. He wondered how she felt with him being so close they could feel each others breath on one another. Then it happened…their eyes finally met…and then just when you think something was going to really happen… Sara moved from under Grissom …but you could tell she felt what he felt…and just didn't…couldn't let the tension build. She has tried to many times to make the effort with Grissom and he's rejected her every time. She wasn't going to give into her emotions because deep down she knew it would not be reciprocated.
To break the tension Sara brings up a sensitive topic..about the promotion both her and Nick applied for…she wanted to make sure that no matter what did or didn't happen between her and Grissom it would not affect his decision about the promotion. Sara rambled on and stumbled on the words…almost sounding foolish even bringing it up…but she needed to...she needed to be sure. Grissom just stood there…didn't respond back and as usual Sara said her speech and just left the room. Grissom could never find the words when Sara was around. He could solve all these crimes…but when it came to personal feelings especially with Sara…he was just lost.
When she was gone…all he could think about was how close he was to her…how he just wanted to say to her or more like show her all the emotions he had built inside all these years for her. He wanted to take her in his arms and kiss her like he's never kissed someone before. But he didn't and couldn't…she deserved better than that…and him in his eyes.
Sara had to get some air…her nerves were so rattled being so close to Grissom. She just couldn't understand how he could deny the feelings they both have for each other. Soon the nerves just became a disappointment because yet again…she let Grissom affect her in a way no other man has…and she knows that it's something that will never be.
Finally the shift was over…and it was time to go home…which meant breakfast then sleep for the graveyard shift crew. As she was leaving Grissom called out to Sara asking if she wanted to go to breakfast…she was a little surprised..but then heard Nick and Catherine say that sounds like a great idea and invited themselves to go as well. She would never know if Grissom wanted to be alone with her or if he intended on asking everyone…but either way….she declined the offer and went home.
Grissom somewhat disappointed because he was just looking to spend some time alone with Sara outside of working on a case…but he couldn't bring himself to just make it happen.
Sara went home…put on her radio and just sat listening to music for a while. Grissom went to breakfast with the crew..but all he could think about was being so close to Sara. Why was it so hard for him to just let go and let himself feel what he knows he feels. Why couldn't he just show it.
In Sara's apartment…she is just about ready to get some sleep..when she hears a knock at her door. She is wondering who would be knocking at her door this early in the morning. She went to answer it and it was Greg…he was worried about her..wondered why she didn't go to breakfast.. Deep down she was hoping it would be Grissom…but not surprised it wasn't. Greg has always had a thing for Sara..and if he was just a little older…you just never know what could be..but Sara just didn't feel that way about Greg. Her connection was to Grissom..Greg was a close friend and would be nothing more.
Little did Sara know that in her building parking lot was Grissom…sitting in his car…trying to make up his mind to go in or not. Then he saw the car….Greg's car..and a shot of hurt crept up on him. Did she decline breakfast to spend time with Greg. Did he miss something that may have been happening with them? No..it couldn't be anything..he was just over reacting…but then he thought more about it and they did spend a lot of time together…maybe it was too late for him now. Maybe she had moved on. He was always pushing her away..why shouldn't she move on. He went to start his car when he saw Greg leave.
A string of emotions crept up on him…..just when he was about to put the car in Drive…he turned his engine off. He wasn't going to give her up without atleast telling her how he felt.
Sara was sitting in her apartment still planning on getting a little shut eye..when she heard another knock..thinking it was Greg..she shouted out.."Greg….miss me already!" when she opened the door her heart stopped ..it was Grissom and here she was yelling out Greg's name. Then she realized it didn't matter….Grissom didn't have feelings for her and he was probably only there for work reasons anyway.
Grissom asked.."may I come in? She just stood there and said oh I'm sorry yeah come on in. So what's up Grissom? Did I forget something at work? Grissom just looked at Sara and didn't say anything. Grissom? Are you OK? What's up? Why are you just standing there staring? Grissom shook his head…to snap out of this trance he was in just by being in the same room with her. In Sara's mind she was just waiting to hear about a case or something work related but then Grissom came out and asked her why she turned down breakfast…he wanted to make sure she was OK? Sara just looked at him in a strange manner…wondering why would he come all the way here to ask her that. Sara just responded back that she just wasn't up for breakfast today. All Grissom could think about was why was Greg here? So he had to ask…"I saw Greg driving away as I pulled up…everything OK? Oh yeah…he just came over to see what was up and talk for a little while. All Grissom could say was Oh.
So why are you here Grissom…oh um…I was thinking about the case and what you were saying that happened at the scene. Sara just knew it was work related but she had hoped., wished it wasn't. And? And well I just wanted to say nice work. You came all the way here to tell me nice work? Yeah, I wanted to tell you over breakfast but you weren't there and I thought you should know.
Sara was just like, ok….thanks. She thought for a second…wow she was being rude. she should offer him something to drink at least. So she asked…you thirsty.? His response was no thanks I should be going and let you get some sleep. Sara wanted him to stay but knew there was no point in that because he would never discuss anything but work. So she just responded with, yeah you could probably use the rest to Grissom. It was a long night.
As he was heading toward the door…his hand on the knob he called her name "Sara"…I wanted to…to what Sara asked. Oh nothing it could wait until they were at work again. She thought maybe there was more to this visit than just work but he wasn't going to share it if it was. Well OK Grissom I guess I'll see you tonight at work…and he was just like yeah ok.. But then something happened…his heart finally took over his mind and he turned to face her. Sara….I didn't come here because of work. I came to see you…to talk with you…talk about what Sara asked. You know what Grissom said. She was just confused. She knew what she hoped it would be but also knew this was Grissom and it was never going to be about them.
So what did you want to talk about Grissom.? About earlier on the case…oh I thought it wasn't work related Gris. It's not! Let me finish…ok… ok sara said. When we did that reenactment today…I just couldn't get it out of my head. Sara interrupted…that's the way you usually are on cases…always thinking long and hard. He said no…Sara it wasn't the case…it was about you…about us. Sara just stood there in shock…did he just say us? What about us Grissom?
I'm not very good at this Sara.. Good at what? There is no us…what are you so worked up over. That comment hit him hard…he felt he had pushed her away for good for her to make such a comment. He just stared at her…all she could say what is it that you need from me Grissom? He just blurted out I need you to stop making me feel all tangled up inside. She didn't know how to take that but coming from him she assumed it wasn't a compliment. So she reacted like she always does…me make you all tangled up inside! What does that mean! I didn't do anything to you! She was getting very upset and of course Grissom couldn't find the words…so he did the unthinkable…he went up to her and pulled her close and kissed her. It started off slow but then she reciprocated the kiss and it got to be very intense. They were both quivering. She waited so long for him to make a move…but never in her wildest dreams did she ever think he would. They finally broke the kiss and Sara backed away and asked him what did that mean? He of course couldn't answer…she asked him again…what did that mean? Why did you do that? And all these thoughts rushed to his head and all he could say was I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. You're sorry Sara said! You're sorry…you come to my place…and kiss me and now all you can say is I'm sorry. Just leave Grissom…I'm so tired of being made a fool of by you. You just can't care for anyone in a way that lets them into your life. The sad part is…I think you want to but you just let your mind take over your heart and I always end up getting hurt from it. No more! It stops here!
Tell me what you want from me Grissom…tell me how you feel! That kiss meant something and you need to tell me what it was! This is it…no more chances…if you have nothing to say than I suggest you just leave. He couldn't find the words to say…and finally Sara walked to the door and opened it and just asked him to leave. You can't keep playing with my emotions Grissom. I'm a person and I deserve better than to be toyed with. This isn't a game to me. I have real feelings like a real person. Grissom reacted…statng ..I'm not playing any games…and I'm definitely not toying with you Sara. I'm crazy about you! Being around you makes me crazy inside…I want to just hold you and tell you how much you mean to me but I can't…I let my mind control my actions and I end up hurting you. I don't want to hurt you Sara…I just want…What do you want Grissom..tell me? I want…..I want….and he just stops.
She looks at him heartbroken and just says to him, I think you should go now. He picked up his head and walked up to her and she backed away and he moved forward and she backed up fearing what might happen again…only this time she backed up into the wall…and here he was in the same situation as earlier today…she was pinned on the wall and he was just a few inches away from her. I was this close to you today and all I could think about was what it would be like to kiss you…to hold you…to not make it not pretend. She just looked into his eyes and he into hers and he finally said the words… I want you Sara! I want you in my life...if you'll still have me. I'm in love with you! I have been for a very long time.
Sara's heart skipped a beat when she heard his words a smile came over her face…still only inches apart she says to him "pin me down"…and he smiles back at her and they kiss….I really do love you Sara…and I won't deny that I'm scared of this…and Sara responds back…I love you to Grissom..and you're not alone anymore.