Standing Beside the Fallen

Chapter Three - Worries of the Grim Like Dog

Gazing out through the rain streaked window, Sirius Black gave a gigantic sigh and leaned back heavily in his chair. It was just past seven in the morning, and even though he had gotten a few hours of sleep last night before he had been awoken, Sirius was both physically and mentally exhausted. The strain of worry had tempted him to pass out in the chair, listening as the rain pounding on the window and roof lulled him to sleep, but he fought it off with a vengeance. No way would he be caught dead sleeping with everything going on. Not while he was waiting . . .

It had been a little more than three hours ago that the man had been awoken from a deep sleep. At first, he didn't know what had woken him, feeling put out from the wonderful dream he had been having; one where he had been six and was playing Quidditch with the gang of Mauraders on the back of several threshals. When he blinked and looked through the darkness to find a silver leopard patronus at his side, Sirius was immediately worried. He would recognize Remus's patronus anywhere, and he also recognized why it was being sent. Something was wrong in another part of the house, and the patronus had been sent to retrieve him.

He had jumped up from his bed, shivering slightly as the cold hit him from being removed from his comfortable quilt and sheets. He quickly grabbed a bathrobe off the hook on his door and swung it open, allowing for the patronus to run past him and down the corridor. Sirius had been in the Order the first time around, during the first war, and as long as he remembered, using Patronus's had been a way for members of the Order of the Phoenix to communicate with each other when needed. Some patronuses, usually strong ones, where able to bare messages and recite them. Others, like the one currently guiding him to what he expected to be the kitchen as he headed down a set of stairs, were used just to guide people to their owners in case of an emergency.

Sirius did not want to think of what kind of emergency there was that he had to be woken at half past three in the morning. It was very rare that he had been woken in such a fashion, and hoped that whatever was wrong, it was nothing too serious. Upon reaching the kitchen however, Sirius had found the situation he was expecting to be completely opposite. The kitchen was empty save two lone people hidden in the corner of the room. Remus was crouched with his wand in hand, looking over at Sirius in the doorway with a look of hopeless fear on his face. It scared Sirius to see such a prominent and usually together man with a look like that. But when he looked over Remus's shoulder and saw Harry huddled in the corner, he realized why Remus was looking the way he was.

He remembered hurrying forward at seeing his godson in such obvious distress. The boy had looked absolutely frightened, shivering like mad, his fists balled and his eyes clenched shut as though expecting to be struck. The first thing he noticed was how uneven and painful Harry's breathing sounded. He did not need Remus to tell him that Harry was having a panic attack, because it was obvious. But he had allowed Remus to quickly explain what had gotten the boy to be in such a state, and Sirius was shocked. All Remus had done was touch his shoulder!

He didn't exactly remember what he did to calm Harry down. All he had been thinking at the time was a mixture of two things. One, it was absolutely necessary for Harry to calm down or else he would end up hurting himself more than he was. The second thing he was thinking about was Harry had lied to him. He had not been fine from the moment he had fallen through portkey in the kitchen. All the signs that Sirius could see pointed to a case of abuse, and he was stuck with a mixture of blind fury and being absolutely appalled. He had suspected it all day, but now his suspicions were confirmed. Harry had been abused by someone, and Sirius would bet his own life that it was that fat son of a bitch Harry called his uncle.

A fight indeed. The moment Harry had come up with the excuse he knew it wasn't the first time he used such a cover up story. He wondered exactly as he saw Harry's eyes finally open in fear, how long he had been abused for? Was this summer the first time, or had it been going on for years? And more importantly, how far exactly had the abuse gone?

When Harry had jumped for a hug into his arms, Sirius remembered coming back to himself, realizing the severity of the situation as though a burden of weights had been placed on his shoulder. Harry had been his responsibility, and so far he had done a horrible job. The boy he was supposed to be looking after was lying broken in his arms, more afraid than Sirius had ever seen him. He hadn't even seen him look this frightened after he had been brought back from Voldemort's clutch, and that was after seeing his classmate die. He had known that Harry had gone through a hard time and was still going through it, and yet Sirius hadn't been there. What kind of a godfather was he?

He wanted to grasp his hold on the boy and never let go, to comfort him and tell him things were going to be okay. He wanted to tell him that he would never allow any of this to happen ever again but he found that his mouth was glued shut and the most he could do was to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall from his eyes. Several long minutes had passed, but he had found that he didn't care. Harry was gradually falling asleep in his arms, and he felt almost glad. It was obvious that the brutal man had inflicted some serious injuries on his godson and Harry was really hurt, despite how much the boy tried to hide it and say otherwise. Sirius knew that he needed to get a healer into Grimmauld Place immediately, and it would work better if Harry was unconscious when it was done.

A hand on his shoulder brought him back to reality and he looked up to find Remus, still crouched in the floor, and a deep look of concern and fear in his lined face. Sirius's own surpassed the look with intensity as his gaze shifted down to the half conscious boy in his arms and Sirius sighed and shook his head.

"I allowed for that monster to touch him, Remus, and I allowed for this to happen." He said in a rough voice. "I saw that there was something wrong today and I suspected abuse, but I didn't say anything. I hoped that Harry would come to me himself, but that was a mistake. I drove him to this."

He wanted to get up and start to punch and kick everything in his path, to blow holes with his wand through the walls and to scream in fury until his lungs tore and he couldn't anymore. But the presence of Harry in his arms stopped all that. The anger building inside him was just molding itself into pain and he felt like he could physically feel the emotion bleeding through his ribcage and causing pain shooting through his body from his chest.

"You did nothing of the sort, Sirius." Remus said almost harshly. "This is as much of your fault as it is anybody's here for not noticing. Harry was purposely trying to hide it remember? If you are thinking what I am, then it is Vernon Dursley's fault this is all happenings and not your own. But for right now, I don't think it's the right time to be laying blame. Punishments and explanations came come later, but for right now, I think it's a good idea if we get a healer to check up on Harry as quick as possible. If I know Harry as well as I do, he's hiding more pain and injuries than either of us can even imagine."

Sirius had to wholeheartedly agree with that last statement. Even though he had only been with Harry on several occasions the past two years, he knew that Harry was very tough and knew how to take pain. In the past he would have been proud of the way Harry had done this, but now he couldn't help but wish Harry hadn't the ability. He wished with everything he had that Harry had just wrote him a simple letter in the beginning of the summer to say what was going on, and if that was impossible, the moment he had stepped foot inside the house earlier that afternoon.

Sirius had stayed while Remus had called Dumbledore to send for a healer. Tonks and Kingsley, who had spent the night after the long meeting, had been woken and filled in on what was going on. When Sirius had gotten Harry settled in the bed, he noticed that he had gained a fever, and it was growing steadily warmer as the minutes dragged by. To Sirius, it felt like hours before he and Dumbledore returned. But with them, was no healer that Sirius had expected. He had thought Madam Pomfrey would come in, or some trusted healer from St. Mungo's who was an ally with Dumbledore. But no, just like always, it had to be -

"Snape," Sirius hissed and jumped up from his chair when he saw the man slink into the room. "What the hell is he doing here?" He gave Remus a glare as though saying it was his fault, but Remus just sighed and allowed Dumbledore to answer for him.

"Severus had kindly agreed to come and help with the situation, considering that there was nobody else available to help." He said as he and Snape entered the room. "Severus has had enough medical training, more than I have for that matter, and is more than qualified for the job. And considering he is a potion's master, he does have access to the proper tools."

He knew immediately that he did not want his and one of Harry's most hated enemies to be responsible for Harry's care. He did not trust the man as far as he could throw him. For anything, he would inflict more pain than he relieved and he had been entirely vocal with his ideas, but it seemed nobody wanted to listen to him. It wasn't until Snape actually removed Harry's shirt that they all saw poorly wrapped bandages tied around his ribs. Snape unwrapped them with a care Sirius didn't know he had, and when he did the room had gone deathly quiet, and he held no more objections as to who cared for his godson.

Sirius would never though possible that Harry could act as normally as he could when he had been in such obvious pain. His chest and arms looked worse than horrible, it looked more to be a disaster. Sirius couldn't describe exactly what it looked like, but just . . . an array of angry black and blue with the sight of congealed blood flowing from corner to corner. And what was worse, Harry was so skinny that Sirius could count each and every single rib. It had been so horrible to look at that it had left even Snape speechless. Dumbledore had been the one to suggest they leave and allow Severus to work in peace after a full minute of silence, but Sirius refused. It wasn't until he had been bodily removed that he had resigned, storming into the study next to Harry's bedroom and slammed the door behind him.

And that was where he had remained until now, sitting and staring out of the window watching as light dawned on a new day, and waiting for the news to come. He had had three hours to think of the whole situation, and three hours to think of what was going to happen to Harry. He knew that Harry had a longer road ahead of him in recovery than it took just for him to be physically better. The mental trauma had obviously left the boy in a state, and Sirius was making it his duty to help Harry out of it. Up until now he had been a lousy godfather, and as sure as hell was he going to let that continue to happen. Harry needed somebody he could trust, and Sirius wanted, no needed to be that person.

Remus had come knocking on the study door twice already. The only reason Sirius answered was to ask if there was any news on Harry, but each time there was none. When he heard that he had merely slammed the door behind him and refused to talk unless it was about an update on the boy's health. Snape had been inside the room with the boy and seemed to let no news escape him on his progress. For the fourth time, Sirius jumped up from his seat and started to pace. It was going to be a long day.

Ten minutes later, he heard another knocking at the door.

"Sirius! Severus finished and wants to give us an update!" Remus called through the door. Faster than what seemed humanly possible, Sirius reached the door in a flash and bolted past the man, down the hall and into the room where Severus, Tonks, Kingsley, and Dumbledore was quietly conversing at the foot of Harry's bed. Remus entered at a quick pace behind Sirius and seemed just as anxious.

Sirius's eyes traveled over to Harry who was lying still on the bed. The bruising on his face did not seem as prominent as it was before, which Sirius guessed because Severus had applied some healing salve, and he did not look as pale as before. His shirt was still off and the blankets pulled up to halfway up his chest, revealing some thick bandage on his ribcage, and covered most of the sight. Harry's arms, which had been littered with severe bruising of fingerprints, burns and welts, looked better than before, though still tender.

Severus cleared his throat in an impatient manor and Sirius immediately came from his trail of thought and concentrated on the potions master. As he and Remus sat down, Sirius noticed something about the man that seemed different. There was a look on his face that he remembered seeing only given when he was in the middle of a complicated potion. And that had been only on several occasions. Sirius couldn't pinpoint what kind of emotions that the look seemed, but the man's scowl wasn't nearly as heavy, and his lips were thinner than they usually were.

"After several hours of working on the boy, I managed to heal him the best I could without certain magic interfering with each other causing his body to have a reaction on such exposure." Severus stated. "He had a few fractures and some severe bruising, with some sprains and a concussion, but he's in a good state for what he just came from." The man paused and glanced over to the still too pale boy lying unconscious in the bed.

"I gave him a heavy sleeping draught that should keep him asleep until late this afternoon, possibly until tonight. The amount of magic I used to heal his body will probably keep him feeling overwhelmingly tired for the next few days, so don't be alarmed if he finds himself to be sleeping most of the time. I managed to get his fever down for a little while before it started to rise again, and I suggest giving him another fever reducing potion around noon today to help try and keep it down.

"His ribs were probably the biggest problem I was facing. He had two fractured and two bruised, and I was afraid he had done some damage to his organs and was thankful for his sake to find that wasn't so. The bruising will go away, though slowly, and his ribs will be tender so I suggest he doesn't move much for a couple of days. Other than that there was his concussion, which has been dealt with to the best of my ability, and it should be fine in a few days. However he will be a little slower than usual." A small sneer crept on his mouth, but it disappeared quicker than usual. "I left several potions on the nightstand just in case there is a complication."

"Thank you for all of your help, Severus." Remus said. "Both Sirius and I appreciate it." He added, giving Sirius a sideways look as though forcing him to agree. Biting his tongue, Sirius gave a curt nod and looked at the wall hard. Snape's lip curled in satisfaction.

"I'll be back every couple of hours until tomorrow night to check on his status. If there is a complication whilst I am absent, you know where to find me." Severus said, packing up the duffel bag he had brought with him. With a nod to the headmaster he left the room, closing the door behind him. Sirius immediately got up from his chair and headed across the room, sitting in the one that had been position beside the bed so that he could be closer to his godson. He didn't say a word to anyone else as he sat, gazing down on his godson.

"What's going to happen to Harry professor?" Remus said and Sirius's ears perked up even though he continued to stare at the bed. "Surely he isn't going back to his relatives house?"

Sirius listened as Dumbledore sighed. "No, Harry will not be returning to the Dursley residence. For the rest of the summer, it's best if he stays here as planned, and as for next summer, well we can deal with it as time passes."

"Why can't he just stay here?" Sirius hissed glaring at the headmaster.

"Sirius, you know as well as I that even with so many safety matters in this house, it still is hardly safe enough for him. But, it may be our only option, so I will keep the thought open for suggestion."

Anger pulsed through Sirius like a bullet, and he quickly jumped through his feet. "It shouldn't have to be a consideration! I'm his godfather and he should be here with me!"

"Sirius, calm down!" Kingsley said, putting a hand on his shoulder, but Sirius shrugged it off and stepped away from him.

"Sirius, you know as well as I that you cannot be placed as a legal guardian. If the Ministry finds out that Harry is no longer at his relatives home, they will question about his whereabouts and that's the last thing any of us, especially Harry, needs right now. It is also why we cannot give up the Dursley's to the authorities, muggle or magical."

"What!" Sirius and Remus both chorused.

"How can you say that!" Sirius yelled. "That bastard needs to be punished for what he did to Harry! Because of him, Harry's afraid of anybody who touches him! You didn't see how scared he was down in the kitchen last night! Vernon Dursley did that to him, and he needs to get what he deserves!"

"In time, Sirius he will." Dumbledore said. "I'm sorry, but for right now it is not as important as Harry himself. Revenge will become better with time. That, is something I can promise you." Dumbledore had a note of finality in his voice, something that not even Sirius could argue with. Instead, he turned around and kicked the wall, a resounding thud going around the room as Sirius growled from anger and pain and stalked back over to the chair beside Harry's bed.

Dumbledore sighed, watching the man. His blue eyes were grave, and for anybody who knew him a long time would say that the man looked as if he had aged ten years overnight. Nevertheless, he still held the usual demeanor of a man in charge of the situation, calmly and collectively, just as he always did. "Tonks, Kingsley." He said quietly turning to the two who were standing beside the window. "I was hoping if you two would be able to stay here for a few days to help out with things."

Tonks and Kingsley nodded.

"Of course, Professor." Tonks said. She held a no nonsense tone in her voice, something that was only heard in the right sort of circumstances.

"Good." Dumbledore said. "Remus, make sure he doesnt do anything stupid," Dumbledore added in an undertone to the man, who nodded. Everyone in the room knew that Sirius had a hot temper, and when that flared, it was hard for him to control his actions. "Do not let him leave the house under any circumstances."

"Now," Dumbledore said. "I'll be back with Severus tonight to check on Harry. Just like Severus, you know where to find me if I am needed. Good day, and good luck." He said quietly before turning and quietly headed out of the room. The silence hung for a few moments before it was broken by Sirius.

"Sometimes I want to wring that man's neck." Sirius said. "And today is no different."

Harry woke to the sounds of soft voices buzzing around him. At first it seemed like a distant buzz, slowly entering the black abyss he had found himself in and pulling him out. As the seconds went by, the buzz started to grow louder, and Harry couldn't help but feel his muddle mind starting to clear as the jumbled voices started to make sense to him. He wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep, and just enter the blackness and not have to worry about anything. He was so tired, and it seemed just so easy. But his thoughts were becoming more lucid, and he suddenly asked the once question that brought him to full consciousness: What happened?

He tried to think back, and his mind managed to produce the scene in the kitchen. His heart started to sink when he realized he had fallen apart in front of Sirius and Remus like that. Now what were they going to think of him? After that he found that his mind was becoming blank. Surely he still wasn't in the kitchen, it felt like he was lying in a soft bed.

Suddenly, as though it had hit him in the head, Harry remembered about his uncle's abuse, which was the reason for him falling apart in the kitchen in the first place. He remembered Professor Lupin and two other people - Tonks and Kingsley that was their names - coming to get him and bringing him Grimmauld Place, the headquarters for an Order of some sort. He couldn't remember the name right now, but it seemed rather obvious. He passed it off as unimportant and he grew nervous. Did Sirius and Professor Lupin know that he had been abused?

He groaned softly as he shifted his head, and found that to be a huge mistake. It felt too heavy for his liking and it was pounding furiously from the back all the way to behind his eyes. Opening his eyes, blinked hard to try and rid himself of the lingering sleep. Squinting around, he was able to make out the blurry and dark room just enough to realize he was in his bedroom at Grimmauld Place. Squinting hard, Harry could just make out a figure standing over by the door and talking softly to someone in the doorframe.

Immediately Harry's still confused mind panicked, thinking the worst of the person over by the door. He quickly tried to sit up, despite the pain from his head and the dull pain from his chest but found he was a little more unsteady than he thought and instead of jumping to his feet, he found himself rolling right off the side of the bed and landing with a crash onto the floor. He winced from the landing and bit his lip hard.

"Harry!" Someone said quickly and he heard footsteps approach. His eyes quickly snapped open, and even though his vision was still blurry, he was able to make out Sirius plainly crouched above him, looking worried.

"I'm fine." Harry said quickly, his voice rasping and still thick with sleep. "I just . . . got a little disoriented."

Sirius sighed and gently lifted Harry from the floor and placed him back onto the bed as gently as he could. Harry blushed a deep crimson from having to be picked up from the floor. Sirius seemed to notice this and allowed a small sad smile as he handed the boy his glasses.

"Don't be embarrassed Harry, I'm surprised you even had the energy to fall out of bed." Sirius said as he pulled the blankets over Harry's chest again.

By now, Harry knew exactly what was going on. He wasn't that stupid, after all. He realized that he was lying with absolutely no energy in a bed while Sirius hovered over him like a mother hen. It was also a dead giveaway due to the fact that he wasn't wearing a shirt and the bandages around his chest were constricting his movement quite a bit.

To say that he was ashamed would be a hell of an understatement at the moment. He felt so embarrassed that he couldn't even look Sirius in the eye. Instead he closed his eyes and tried to give Sirius the notion that he didn't want to talk. He knew that Sirius and even possibly Professor Lupin would hound him on it eventually, but this was the last thing in the world he wanted to discuss. If he had to become mute to do it, he would. He was just ashamed enough to do that too.

"Harry." Sirius said quietly, and he knew the inevitable was about to come. Why now? Why not when he was thirty-five or so? "You know we need to talk about this."

Harry didnt answer, but instead he willed himself to roll over onto his side and face the wall. He brought his knees up to his chest and suppressed a wince of pain. He heard Sirius sigh behind him and he knew he was being rude, but he had already brought enough to trouble to the man. He didn't think he needed to bring anymore. He was such a stupid moron for letting them find out that he didn't care that his position was sending pain coursing through his body. He welcomed it.

"We don't have to talk now." Sirius said, and Harry blinked, glancing behind him. "But sooner or later we will have to talk. Why don't you just get some rest for now, eh?"

Harry's only response was silence and after a few seconds he heard Sirius get up and move to the other side of the room. He wished that Sirius would just leave and let him be alone for a while but he doubted that was going to happen. As much as he was grateful that Sirius wasn't accusing him of anything like he thought, he felt the need to just separate himself. He didn't want Sirius to carry the burden of Harry's pain, or make Sirius have to deal with the trouble he brought wherever he went. No, he couldn't cause Sirius that pain. He, least of all, didn't deserve that.

Authors Note: Not really liking this chapter much. Oh well. Okay, technically Harry still hasn't told anyone, even if they've basically figured it out. Anyways, reviews are much appreciated. I need them for motivation. Just as fanfiction can be a drug, reviews are too. Not in a bad way though.

I'm going to have a poll! Yay! I love Tonks, and she will be a part of this story, and I want to know, who do you think she should be paired up with? Her story won't be major but – hint, hint – she will help a lot with Harry and be close to him and she needs a boyfriend! Who do you think it should be – Remus, Bill, Charlie, Kingsley? You tell me, majority wins. Just a fun little thing I guess. Pairings won't be major in this story (sorry if I hear groans) but they will still be there . . . somewhere in there, even if they seem small.

So, Happy New Year to you all, unless you know, your Chinese which I will then say Happy January 1st. Kudos and review!

BlondxCrayon