Never to Regain
Sequel to "To Have Lost"
Note: Please read "To have lost" before reading the sequel otherwise you will be confused!
By: Anoke
Disclaimers: I Don't own Dragonball Z Or "Last Words" By Thousand foot krutch
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I often think back to that night, I just want to tell them im sorry! I want them to know how much I love them.. I may have lost the one thing that was mine.. But I stood up to him! I made him see atleast.. Or I just made a fool of myself.. And let him win.. No matter how you look at it he won.. I may have tried to stop him! I gave it all I had.. But it wasent enough I still lost my life.. I knew what would happen so did little bulla.. But I had to I couldnt go on just giving in to him! I had to stand up for myself even if I lost my life..
Dear loved one, please listen
This might be the last chance I get
I'm sorry I left you
I'm living in a world of regret
Don't cry if you can hear me
I never meant to hurt you dearly
I'm so wrong sincerely
Don't stop take life seriously
I sometimes wish I could change what I did, what I tried to do.. It accomplished nothing! All I ended up doing was letting him win our war.. Now, now he can hurt her whenever he wants.. He doesnt have me to be his punching bag, now.. Now that I am gone my mother is his punching bag, it makes me sick! I just want to scream.. I want to tell my mother and sister.. That im sorry! That I love them.. I wish I could tell them I wish I could protect them from the man that is suppose to love them, and be their protecter..
These are the last words
I'm ever gonna get to say to you
When everything falls away from you
Take these words
And know the world is not worth leaving
I always blamed myself for why dad acted this way, when I left home I blamed myself, I said that was why dad did this.. I hurt you and I hurt bulla in the process.. I was wrong though.. I never made him raise his hand to any of us! He did that! Not me! He is the one that choice to do it! Not me! I shouldnt blame myself.. But on the other hand I need someone to blame.. I need someone to take the fault! I need one thing to keep the love for my father going.. Its amazing.. He hit me, he hit my mother, he took my life.. But yet.. I cant seem to stop caring for him.. I cant stop being the little boy that needs his daddy.. Somewhere in my heart I think my father cares.. I think there is a reason to why he does what he does.. But then there is a part that wants to shove all those feelings away, banish them to the otherworld where I am destined to stay.
There's so much I've done wrong
Since I left it hit me so strong
Take my hand and let's walk through
All the times I've lied and hurt you
Those people, please love them
Don't hate them, we're not above them
You can have everything, but have nothing
Listen I've got to tell you something
I want my mother and my sister to know.. I tired, everynight I tried to think of a way to set us free of our hell, I tired to think of reasons why the person we loved and cared for turned on us and gave us pure hate.. I never found a reason why he would act like this.. But I still never stopped trying to come up with a reason.. I believe even now there is a reason.. But I also believe I should stop being blind and see him for who he really is.
These are the last words
I'm ever gonna get to say to you
When everything falls away from you
Take these words
And know the world is not worth leaving
I watch down on my mother and sister, and it makes me cringe, my father is so full of hated, pure hatred it sickens me, he hurts my mother, he makes my little sister cry, he brings them pain.. The funny thing about all of this is goku knew.. Goku knew what my father did, what my father does and he did nothing.. Can I blame him? Did goku think the same thing I did.. That if we stayed with him. My father would find a way to make us pay? Or did he just not care? How could he just sit by and let this happen.. He feels bad now.. I can tell it's eating at him day and night.. He thinks to himself if he just would had did something, anything maybe I would still be alive.. The funny thing about that is.. I often think the same thing.. If I had did something different or said something different if I would still be alive..
Last words I'll ever really get to say to you
So listen very carefully to what I'm saying
Life is more than just the games you're playing
If there was ever one thing
I could ever get across to you
I'd tell you not to say the things you do
And tell my mother that I love her too
And no matter what life pulls ya through (no!)
You've got what it takes to make it through
And if I was you, I'd get on my knees and pray
Thank God in the morning for another day
Cause...
The day of my funeral was sad, even for me.. Its strange sitting up here watching yourself be berried underground for the rest of eternity. It also hurts.. Seeing the face of your mother.. Swollen with tears your little sister thinking it's all her fault.. Thinking if she just would have made me stay in I would still be alive.. Goku wishing he would had done something, anything.. And there is my best friends goten and marron.. There are both crying uncontrollably.. Its sad knowing I will never be able to hang out with them again.. gohan is even sad.. I once thought I had no one in the world to care for me.. But now after I have left this world I can see.. I can see how many people loved me. Cared for me..
These are the last words
I'm ever gonna get to say to you
When everything falls away from you
Take these words
And know the world is not worth leaving
I look around for my father
Last words I'll ever really get to say to you
So listen very carefully to what I'm saying
Life is more than just the games you're playing
Life is more than just the games you're playing
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Please Read!
Yay almost the end :D i want to thank everyone for revewing and reading! this is the 2nd to the last chapter, next chappie will be shorter, but it is the end..
Please review :D