"Akane, if you would excuse my curiosity... HOW IN THE HELL DID SHE JUST DO THAT?" Ranma calmly enquired. Really, floating in the air, surviving a blazing inferno, and almost having her head taken off by a spud launcher... but that was three feet of concrete...
"HOW SHOULD I KNOW!" Akane shouted back, attempting to put as much distance between her and her sister as possible. She was running out of options, fast, but her own temper continued to grow the more Kasumi defied her.
"Uh, and one other thing, Akane..."
"WHAT?"
"Perhaps we should stop shouting, or we'll never hear the sound of the approaching rottwieler..."
Akane stopped, "What rott-" Then, she heard the faint rumbling; the low, almost subsonic, earth trembling growl that was steadily getting louder, "What the-ACK!"
Ranma blinked, as Akane just narrowly pulled away from gaining a brilliant smile that stretched all the way around her neck. He turned to look at the attacking source, and was rather surprised, "Wow, never seen 'em miss before..."
Bunny glared universes of malice at Akane, as its claws pierced into the concrete sidewalk, growling like an underfed and threatened rapid doberman, and its teeth clenched the Chicago straight razor in its mouth even tighter.
"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THAT THING?" Akane screeched, rubbing her neck nervously. She just barely dodged again, as Bunny made another playful pass at one of Akane's vital areas.
"Hmm, seems upset about something," Ranma mused, "You didn't stroke Bunny's fur the wrong way, did you? Rabbits really hate that."
"I WOULDN'T EVEN TOUCH THE DAMN THING!" Akane ducked, causing Bunny to soar right over her, and slice through the chain link fence behind her.
"Uh huh, uh huh," Ranma nodded firmly, before pounding his fist into his hand, "That's it! Bunny's feeling dejected you're not playing with him! I think he's making up for lost time."
"Ranma, I swear if-ACK- you don't do some-OW IT NICKED ME!-thing, I swear I will do something irrevocably RASH!"
Ranma simply took out a Polaroid camera...
"THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!"
Ranma took out a pen, and wrote on the back of the photo 'Akane and Bunny; playtime'.
Akane managed to maneuver the rabbit into a concrete telephone pole, watching it get lodged halfway in, before the pole fell in half.
Ranma finished dating the picture, and nodded at his penmanship, "So, you ready to go, now? Your sister should have caught up with us by now."
"DAMN IT! IF YOU WOULD HAVE ONLY CALLED OFF YOUR PSYCHO-BEAST WE'LD-"
Akane jerked her head to the bunny that attempted to blindside her, as a blast of energy impacted with it, and sent it sprawling several yards away. "Kasumi..."
"If you're quite done playing with the damn rabbit," Said sister growled, completely livid from having to chase Akane across Nerima.
"I'm getting the feeling she's been letting us get away," Ranma's consideration was ignored, as Akane pulled him along. "You know? I think she's letting you dig yourself in deeper."
"SHUT UP! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT ANYHOW!"
"Hey," Ranma retorted, aggravated at the accusation, "How is this my fault?"
:THOCK:
"Hmm, this isn't good" Ranma admitted, as he stared at the arrow imbedded in the stone wall, just an inch from his nose. Both turned, to find themselves suddenly surrounded by the legion of Chinese Amazons.
"No chances this time," The Amazon elder with the wraparound shades and enough bling-bling to fund a small country, Han Tao, commanded, "Bows at ready... on my word, ice the punk-bitch."
"But, um, what about the girl with him?" The lavender haired leader of the hunting party, Shampoo, enquired.
"Shoulda checked herself before she wrecked herself." Shampoo translated that to 'unfortunate innocent casualty', before raising her bow.
"RIGHTOUSNESS IS OURS!"
"NO! NO!" Han Tao screamed out, as a rain of fire descended upon the outer ring of Amazons
"Hey guys, start'n to miss ya," Ranma greeted his acolytes, as they attacked the Amazons with a zealous fervor.
"BY THE PRAISE OF THE MESSIAH, WE DELIVER HIM FROM THE EVILS THAT SURROUND HIM!" Brother Joe decreed, raising his giant claymore over his head, and charging at Akane with a blind fury. He was almost upon her before, "OW! SOMETHING BIT ME!"
Something apparently bit him, as he stumbled to the ground; his hands discarding his weapon to rub his nipped rear.
Ranma looked from the tiger striped bandanna that was sticking out of Brother Joe's butt, and towards the young man it originated from.
"Ranma, how dare you bring this poor, innocent girl into your hellish mess?" Ryoga seethed, as he stalked towards Ranma.
"Innocent? You haven't been keeping up with current events, have you?" Ranma commented drolly, while Akane nodded in agreement.
Ryoga's retort had to be delivered at another time, as a giant bovine-aviary-serpentine-primate landed next to him, and batted the lost boy out of the way with his crutch.
"DARLING! You saved me from that brute!" Ranma proclaimed, clapping his hands together...
"You have no shame," Akane commented, almost embarrassed to be seen with the pigtailed boy.
Ranma then noticed the steam snorting from the creature's nose, the bloodshot eyes, its left arm in a sling, and its right leg in a cast. The pigtailed boy groaned at the sight, "Great, you're gonna complain about 'spousal abuse' again, aren't you? I told you, if we would only go to counseling we can make this a happy marriage!"
Pantyhose Saotome's pupils seemed to disappear from his eyes, as he raised his crutch high above his head to crush the ultimate bane of his life. Unfortunately, he forgot that his right leg was incapable of supporting him. Akane gasped, and ran off, leaving the young martial artist to his 'lover's quarrel'.
Ranma and Akane both jolted, as Ranma's spouse opened his mouth in a soundless scream, and fell flat on his face. The two teens watched, as he slowly pulled itself up to its one hand and knees, and crawled after Ranma.
"Sayuri! I almost didn't see you hiding for your life behind this heavily damaged wall!" Akane chirped, glad to see her friend.
"Ah, hi Akane, just pretend to keep not seeing me!" Sayuri responded with a quivering voice...
"Heh, you're such a kidder sometimes," Akane giggled, lightly slugging one of her best friends in the arm, "Hey, can you do me a favor"
"LEAVE MY SWEET RANMA ALONE!" Pantyhose Saotome's progress was halted, by the effect of a divine Hindu being slamming him through the street.
Ranma waited patiently, as the Ashura crawled from the newly created hole, "Ranma!"
"Yo."
It's a rather disturbing sight, to see a six armed, several yards tall, three headed, golden feminine demon skip towards you. Ranma had apparently gotten used to it. "I missed you!"
"Uh, I guess it's been what... a day or so?" Ranma enquired.
"Won't you greet your love with a kiss?" Rouge pleaded, fluttering the eyes on her front face.
"Ah... close all your eyes, then!" Ranma requested. The Ashura complied, before leaning forward, and tasting the sweet, delicious lips of the one she pledged she loved.
"A-hyuck, I've never kissed a girl before!"
Rouge opened her eyes, to find one of the white robed idiots that have been littering the area before her, "You're not my Sweet Ranma..."
"Can we kiss again?"
The eyes on the Ashura's front face narrowed into a hooded gaze, while the next set of eyes glared, and the left eye on the final set twitched.
"Yo, Akane, where'd you run off to?" Ranma shouted out, strolling through the war zone, while ignoring the screaming disciple that ran past him on fire.
"So I says to myself, if ah ever want rabbit fricassee, ah gotta serve up its owner for the main course..."
Ranma turned just in time to see the blow torch pointing in his direction.
"LEAVE MY SWEET RANMA ALONE!"
"That's two I owe ya, I guess," Ranma stated with gratitude, as Rouge intercepted the fire blast from the trench-coated Texan. After getting herself braced, the Hindu divine being started pushing against the powerful stream. Creed grit his teeth, as he felt the resistance pushed back into him. He began to back up, slowly losing this battle of force.
Ranma watched them take their fight away from him, before turning towards the diminutive ancient martial artist that landed before him, "THIS TIME, RANMA, YOU WILL DIE!"
"But by my hand," a raspy voice interjected, just as a segmented chain wrapped around Happosai's leg, "So why don't you gets to stepp'n, O'G'?"
With a flip of the wrist, Happosai was sent into the sky. At the spectacle, Ranma had to applaud. Han Tao bowed, before brandishing her snake cane.
She then joined Happosai skywards, as a yeti-ox-crane-eel-octopus thing punched up out of the ground, and turned to glare with infinite malice at Ranma.
Happosai landed, taking Pantyhose Saotome out of the equation, "Now, where were we before we were interrupted, Ranma 'm boy?"
"LEAVE MY SWEET RANMA ALONE!"
"Rouge-chan, how could youuuuuuuu!"
"Thanks, babe!"
The Ashura beamed, before yelping, and running from the flying barrage of quality cutlery. "DON'T WORRY, THEY'RE HEAT RESISTANT, DARL'N!" Creed chortled, as he continued to toss volleys of butcher knives at the demoness.
"So, you enjoying yourself?"
"Oh, hey, Akane, wondering where you ran off to," Ranma greeted, before answering her question, "I can't say, it's kinda like watching reruns now."
"Yeah," Akane agreed, "kinda hungry, there's an ice cream shop nearby, if you're interested."
"Sounds good to me." Both Ranma and Akane turned to leave, "So, where did you go?"
"Ah, had to make a phone call. Sayuri was kind enough to let me use her cell."
"Well, that was awfully nice of her. Who did you call?"
Akane grinned, "We better hurry if we wanna enjoy that ice cream."
"Like you deserve ice cream, Akane-ducky!"
"Shit, forgot about her!" Akane groused, before looking up at Kasumi. Everyone paused, turning their attention up to the vibrantly glowing, and incredibly irked elder sister of the Tendou clan. "Will you just give it a rest, Kasumi?"
"All of you should be ashamed of yourselves!" Kasumi scolded the gathered mass, "acting like a bunch of hooligans in this quiet neighborhood!" And as for you, Akane, we'll discuss this when we get home!"
Akane blinked, before looking past Kasumi, and grinning, "Ah, I'm afraid none of us have time for that, sis."
"Huh?" Ranma turned to look where Akane was, before baulking. Bearing down on them, was a missile a little larger than a bus. Didn't take long to figure out what Akane's call was about, "ARE YOU INSANE?"
The sentiment was audibly mirrored by the girl floating in the air, directly in the ICBM's path.
To even the south districts of Tokyo, the brilliant light could be seen, awing and terrifying the residents of Japan's capital. Whoever unleashed the terrible attack was to be feared, and had much to answer for. The light faded, revealing a mushroom cloud growing in its place. With sorrow, many of citizens noted that it seemed to be settled in one of the northern districts.
The residents of Nerima, particularly the ones sitting at... or rather under ground zero, had to admit they were rather awed, too.
"Now Akane-ducky," Kasumi began in a conversational tone, ignoring the force of the blast being held at bay above the city of Nerima... solely by her right hand, "What have I told you about playing with weapons of mass destruction within city limits?"
"N-no way!" Akane breathed, before stumbling to the ground in shock.
Kasumi turned to Pantyhose Saotome, "You, young man, come here please..."
The giant beast looked around him, finding everyone pointed at him. Blinking, he pointed at himself, hoping he wasn't really the object of her attention.
"Yes, you," Kasumi responded in an agitated sigh. Hesitantly, Pantyhose Saotome made his way towards the woman, as she landed on the ground, still holding the inverted dome of energy up over everyone, "Hold this for me, it's not quite that heavy, I assure you."
Pantyhose took over, and almost baulked at the strain.
Kasumi marched towards her youngest sister, and past her, dragging Akane along by the arm. Everybody parted for her, as she then sat down on a bus stop bench, and pulled Akane over her lap, "This will hurt me more than it will you!"
No matter how many times it's been heard, the gathered crowd developed a unified sneeze that sounded peculiarly like 'bullshit'.
Akane went stiff, as she felt her panties pulled down to expose her bare bottom, but then jolted when she felt the first meaty smack. As the smacks continued, the gathered audience turned away in sympathy and respect, while at a dual mind to admit that she had it coming to her.
"I wish it didn't have to come to this" Kasumi stated, pulling Akane's underpants back up, and standing the thoroughly humiliated girl before her, "but you're my dear little ducky, and I want you to be a good girl, for me, please?"
Akane wanted to remain ever defiant, so that she could punish her eldest sister in relatively short time; but the look on Kasumi's face, the sad, pleading, yet firm expression that she hadn't seen in years... it was a look only one person she ever knew and loved could pull off.
"M-Mommy?"
Kasumi nodded, allowing a slight smile to cross her face, as her eyes began to tear up.
"IIM S-SORRY!" Akane proclaimed, latching on to her possessed sister in a needy hug, "I won't do it again! I promise!"
"I know, Akane-ducky, I know," Mrs. Tendou whispered, hugging her daughter back.
"Awwwww," came the unified crowd's comment.
"Well, all's well that ends well, huh Mrs. T?" Ranma interjected, genuinely touched by the whole scene.
"And as for YOU, young man..."
"OW!" Ranma attempted to jerk away from the grasp on his ear, but found it stubbornly tight.
Mrs. Tendou didn't seem sympathetic to his plight, "I think we need to have a discussion with your mother on your conduct!"
Ranma stopped fighting Mrs. Tendou's hold, when it registered what she said, "M-My mother?"