Title: Out of Darkness (1/9)
Author: Luna Rosa
Feedback: Please, I love it.
Fandom: Harry Potter
Summary: Remus Lupin has exiled himself from the wizarding world, unable to deal with the pain of the second war but a near fatal accident reacquaints him with the past and he realises that some old friends may be more in need of him than he thought.
Status: WIP, chapter on of nine.
Archive, SB/RL mailing list, Azkaban's Lair. Anywhere else; just ask.
Rating: PG13 - NC17 (eventually)
Disclaimer: Unfortunately these characters do not belong to me. I am just practising my Imperius Curse on them (shhh).
Dedications: Beta thanks goes to Clara who is the faster beta I've ever seen. Thanks.
Author's note: The beginning of a story that has been nearly two years bubbling away in my head. Remus-centric as I feell he is my moon brother.
Chapter One"Remus, stop being such an arse and use your wand. You turned seventeen months ago," Sirius shouted across the tiny living room.
"I would if I could bloody find it in this mess!" Remus scowled.
"Just be glad we're helping you, Padfoot," James chimed in. "This place is a bit of a dump."
"A bit of a dump?" Peter snorted. "I've already found two rat nests."
"You should feel right at home then, Peter," Sirius teased. "And anyway, I don't see any of you with your own place."
"That's because none of us ran away from home," Remus said as he finally pulled his wand out from under a pile of mouldy curtains.
"Fuck this!" Sirius said throwing his brush into the paint tin. "I'm going for a pint!"
"I'll take care of everything from here," a calm young voice ordered.
"Doctor...?"
"Tennant," came the easy reply. "Now this is my patient, nurse, I think I can look after him for a few moments." There was a teasing smile in the voice, an easy confidence that summoned some long ago place.
Remus moved at the voice. There was something altogether too familiar about it. He opened his eyes and was instantly attacked by the riot of white all around him. It took a moment for his vision to adjust to the bright room. When it did he saw he was attached to so many tubes and machines he couldn't even count them all. His throat felt tight and his stomach was churning like he was about to get sick.
"Ah," the voice counselled, "nice to see you back with us." The voice lowered and moved closer. "Though it seems you might have left us altogether, Mr Lupin."
Remus jerked at his name. He blinked a few times and took in the face before him. Brown hair was better kept now; the boyhood chubbiness had given way to a certain charm in adulthood, but the face was unmistakable.
"N – Neville?" Remus choked and was met with a smile.
"Shh," Neville winked. "Doctor Tennant to you." The young man picked up Remus's chart and pretended to peruse it as he talked. "I'm working in St Mungo's now. We have a nifty little gadget which alerts us when a witch or wizard is brought in to a Muggle hospital... Imagine my surprise when the elusive Remus Lupin shows up in the Royal London Hospital." Neville turns at looks at his 'patient', his eyebrows raised in teasing reprimand. "A lot of people are worried about you, Professor."
"Neville, I can't..." Remus started but Neville quieted with a raised hand.
"Don't worry, I haven't told anyone where you are. I think that's your decision. I did have to bring along an Auror, however," Neville smiled apologetically as he indicated the man at the door. His back was to Remus and he was wearing a brown full length coat over a dark pair of trousers and a pair of scruffy runners. "Ministry policy," Neville explained. "He won't be a problem."
Neville frowned at the tubes running into Remus's body. "I think it'd be an idea to get you to Mungo's, though. The said they're going to cut you open this afternoon." Neville raised his eyebrows as if this was the most ludicrous thing he had ever heard.
Remus smiled, closing his eyes momentarily before nodding.
The Auror walked over took his hands out of his pockets and grasped the end of Remus's bed. He was slightly taller than Neville but his body was lean in comparison. Mid thirties perhaps, though it was hard to tell. Remus could feel an air of scraggy youth; his brown hair just over long. His Muggle clothes might have been described as student Victorian chic. Underneath the coat, he wore a battered suit and opened neck shirt exposing a brown button up vest. The clothes had a certain charm to them even though they looked like they'd been involved in a hippogriff stampede. When he spoke Remus realised he had a hint of Scottish accent to his attentive voice.
"Ready to make an exit?" he asked, his eyes resting on Remus and without waiting for a reply, he smiled as if enjoying himself.
After a quick look around to check no one was watching, he flicked his wand and the tubes recoiled from Remus's skin leaving him free to stand. This however was no easy task. He was weak from the drugs the 'doctors' had pumped into him. Neville muttered angrily under his breath as he tried to support Remus.
"Here, put your arm around my shoulder," Neville ordered. Remus smiled at the man. He seemed to have lost his childhood nervousness quite easily.
The Auror placed his own shoulder under Remus's other arm without question and supported him with a strong hand on Remus's waist. "There we are," he said, holding his body close. Remus leaned into his strength subconsciously.
Neville pulled out a green ball point pen with a heavily chewed lid and looked at his watch. "Grab the end of this," Neville ordered again, pointing the pen at Remus. "I've set it to activate at ten thirty nine, so we should be off any mome-"
Neville's words where cut off as Remus experienced a heavy tugging in his stomach. Feeling like he was going to vomit, Remus recalled the familiar sensation of a Port Key as he hurtled through space but when he felt the ground under his feet once more he couldn't steady himself.
He collapsed to the floor of the hospital ward in St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries.
The Auror was instantly at his side, his wand checking Remus for any immediate injuries.
Before Remus lapsed into unconsciousness once again, he heard Neville Longbottom barking orders as people scurried around and couldn't help but smile.
For the second time in as many days Remus woke in a hospital ward, but at least this time he felt better. His body was stiff. The pain in his chest had subsided, but his head was sounding a dull throb.
He groaned and raised his hand to his forehead. He could make out the stark whiteness of the room through his eyelids.
"Ah, back with the living, are we?" commented a voice from somewhere around him.
He managed to nod slightly as he tried to sit up. A firm yet soft hand pressed on his shoulders, holding him in place.
"Oh no you don't," the voice added and Remus realised it was a woman. "I'm not having you pass out again! Especially as you have friends who were willing to put their own lives at risk to get you here."
The side of his bed dipped as someone sat down. Against better judgement he opened his eyes, frowning at the brightness of the room, and looked at his companion.
She was young, mid twenties Remus guessed, her face having grown recently enough out of adolescence. Her long brown hair was held back in a neat bun under her healer's hat but a few strands had escaped and were framing her plump cheeks. She smiled at him as she leaned back to pick up Remus's chart.
"Now lets see if it was all in vain, shall we?" She flipped through a couple of pages, tipping her wand to one chart or another. "I'm Healer Eliza Colporteur," she introduced. "Mr. Longbottom was pretty insistent that I keep a special eye on you."
"He was?" Remus asked, trying to sit up again. Healer Colporteur gave him a stern look and he stayed where he was.
"Yes, he seemed to think you might wander off," she smiled, raising an eyebrow to suggest that it wouldn't happen on her watch. "I have to say, considering what was done to you I'm surprised you're even awake."
"What was done to me?" Remus repeated in confusion.
"The Muggle doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong with you so they pumped you full of all kinds of potions." Healer Colporteur frowned.
"They call them drugs... Muggle potions," Remus explained.
"Right," Colporteur answered, seeming to take a mental note of this new information. "Of course, they didn't do a jot of good so they decided to feed you more." She put the chart down on her lap and shook her head in disbelief. "Honestly! I don't think you'd have made it if it wasn't for your lycanthropic metabolism helping out."
Remus eyebrows involuntarily shot up at the easy statement of his condition.
"Well, at least you're in our care now." She stood again and placed his chart back at the end of his bed. "Dinner will be in an hour. If you need me I'll be right over there." She pointed to a desk at the far end of the room, smiled and began to walk away.
"Wait!" Remus called, finally having the energy to sit. She knew he was a werewolf! She had just slipped in into conversation as if it was as simple as being overly fit or healthy.
She turned back to him, lips tightening as she noticed him pushing himself up. She moved forward and rearranged his pillows until he was comfortably. "Stubborn one, aren't ya?" she said in a stern voice but the corner of her lips twitched.
"I wanted to ask," Remus started. "What you said about..." he stopped, unsure what he was going to say. Healer Colporteur sat on the bed again. Her face open and easy.
Maybe, Remus though, just maybe things were different now. Maybe he wasn't a beast anymore. He'd had so little contact with the wizarding world; none at all worth talking about... maybe the war really had changed things. He thought about it, wanting it to be true, hadn't he waited his whole life for it, and then he realised that it didn't matter right now. She obviously accepted him and there was something about her that reminded him of a group of friends he had long ago.
"Yes?" she asked.
"Your name?" Remus said, doing some quick thinking.
"Eliza Colporteur," she answered, thinking he hadn't heard.
"It means... well, it used to mean seller of books."
She smiled, impressed. "You know your stuff, eh?"
"I was a teacher, once," Remus returned the smile. "If I had something to read."
"You should be resting," she interrupted, but seeing the pleading look in Remus's eyes she crumbled. "Fine! But if there's even a moment when I think your getting worse I'll take them off you quicker then you can say Merlin's balls." Remus laughed as Healer Colporteur lifted herself from the bed. "Oh, and Mr. Longbottom said to inform him when you woke, but if your not up to visitors."
"No, it's fine. I've had worst visitors while under hospital restrictions." Remus smiled, his eyes glazing for only a moment before he bit back another memory.
"Righty-oh then." She tapped her fingers lightly on the end of the bed in a final farewell and tottered off to deal with the other patients.
Remus had already finished Animagus Winter and was so engrossed in The Dark Arts Outsmarted that he didn't hear the ward door open. It took two polite coughs and a quick shake of his shoulder before he finally looked up at his visitor.
"Oh dear." Remus failed miserably to hide his surprise. "I wouldn't be much good at this anymore," He held up the dart arts book, "letting people surprise me like that."
"Well, I never had any complaints. Actually, I loved your classes," the man smiled, pushing his glasses back up his nose.
"When did you get them?" Remus asked, looking at the gold rimmed frames.
"Oh," Neville exclaimed, suddenly realising he was wearing his spectacles. "They're just for work; the text can be a bit small sometimes," he explained, quickly taking them off and putting them in his top pocket.
He sat on a visitor's chair that appeared beside the bed and ran a reassuring hand through his hair. "So how are you doing? They are treating you well down here?"
"Splendid," Remus answered as he fixed his blanket. "I couldn't ask for more."
Neville smiled, conjuring up some tea for the both of them.
"So you work here." Remus said. "As a Healer?"
"Oh, no." Neville laughed. "I don't think that would be advisable. I couldn't fix a broken nose never mind anything else." Neville smiled as he poured the tea. "No, I'm in Research and Development, with a sideline in missing wizard detection, of course," he added with a quick smile to Remus. "We develop new potions and antidotes." He added two sugars into his tea. "I'm more Research to be honest, growing and cultivating plants. Stripping them down. Potions was never my strong point." He stirred his tea as he continued. "But y'know what? Last week we discovered Threstral sweat, sawbone and shrivelfig, mixed properly, will grow back whole limbs." Neville stopped stirring his tea in his excitement. "I mean, not just bones! So, you get your arm cut off? No problem, just use some... some," Neville grasped for a word, "Limber-up and you'll have four limbs again before you know it." Neville smiled proudly before it turned into a thoughtful frown. "Of course, it does have a tendency to shrink your head ... and sometimes you'll grow a tail, but we're working on that."
"So you've been busy?" Remus said, laughing at Neville's eagerness.
"Yeah," Neville looked up, he smile faltering slightly. "And how have you been?"
"I've kept myself busy with this and that." Remus looked away, his eyes falling on the books Healer Colporteur had given him. "Nothing too exciting."
"I think we've had enough excitement for one lifetime," Neville said quietly, his fingers picking at some dried shrivelfig which had attached itself to his corduroy trousers. "Listen; there are some things I have to ask you. It's not my job, but I said all communication to you had to be cleared by me first," Neville looked at Remus, "to give you some time," he explained. "I thought... I hoped it would be better coming from me than some anonymous Ministry drone."
"Right," Remus said cautiously. "What is it?"
Neville held his wand tightly and used a Summoning Charm. A moment later, a thick roll of parchment blasted through the doors, making Healer Colporteur jump with fright. Neville blushed when she shot him a reproving look but still caught the soaring parchment easily. He broke the seal and unfurled the scroll.
"'Interrogation procedure upon capture of missing or unregistered lycanthropes.'" Neville read with a frown. He looked up at Remus. "It's a bit outdated but it was either this or they wanted to take you up to Registry," Neville explained before scanning through the opening paragraphs. "Most of it is rubbish... 'Guidelines on restraints'... 'Marks of transformations'... 'Branding methods'! Bloody bastards," Neville exclaimed and Remus was sure that Neville indignation had just made him feel better than all the Honeydukes chocolate in Hogmeade.
Neville ripped away the top page viciously and stared at its brother. Remus leaned forward to see a long list of numbered questions. He'd gone through this before when his parents brought him to the Registry after he'd been bitten. He was small and frightened, but that didn't stop the officer from grabbing him roughly and strapping him into a large steel chair. It had reminded Remus of the chairs he'd seen in books about Muggle jails. The chairs prisoners would be strapped into before they were killed. Remus's father had turned purple with anger and his mother had begun to cry again, but the officer just continued as if no one had made a noise.
Remus sighed, "Two hundred and seven questions to ask the new werewolf, right?"
Neville looked down the scroll, "Two hundred and nine, actually," the man frowned again. "Look we don't have to do this now. You only woke up today and -"
"Question one, Neville," Remus prompted, his voice empty of emotion.
Neville pulled out a quill from the inside pocket of his robes and placed it under the words as he read, " 'One. Name and beast number (if any) of admitted werewolf.' "
"Remus Lupin, 4-5683-72," Remus answered automatically.
Neville looked up, "Umm... they want your full name," a small smile played on Neville's lips which he tried to repress.
Remus pursed his mouth, "Remus John Lupin... Happy?"
"Count yourself lucky," Neville said. "Mine's Humperdink." Remus tried to hold it back but a moment later a laugh erupted from his chest. "All my beloved gran's idea! I'm sure she'd turn in her grave if she knew how much I hated it."
Remus stopped laughing abruptly and Neville met his gaze, knowing the compassion in his old teacher's eye only too well. "Last year," Neville explained. "She'd just seen me get promoted so I think she figured it was time to let go."
Remus shook his head in disbelief. Another of the old crowd gone. "I'm sorry, Neville. She was a good woman."
" 'Two,' " Neville continued, his voice shaking slightly, " 'Registered address of admitted werewolf.' "
The questions went on and on. The lunch trolley came and went and when Remus started yawning Neville wanted to leave the questions for another time, but the werewolf insisted. He learned a long time ago that it made no sense to put these things off. He had to deal with it sooner or later, so he preferred to get it over and done with.
Soon after the last question Healer Colporteur bustled over, and demanded that Neville let her change Remus's bandages. The light in the room had started to dim and as Neville stood he stretched his limbs out; working the stiffness out of them.
"Okay," Neville conceded with a yawn, "but he was the one who insisted on finishing." Neville said he'd send scroll up to the Registry. "And Eliza," he added turning to the healer. "Don't forget about dinner."
A slight hue raised on the Healer's cheeks before she pulled the screens around Remus's bed. "Oh, that one," she commented after Neville left, "tries to buy me off with dinners and chocolates, but I know his game." She spoke tersely but as her gentle fingers replaced Remus's bandages he noticed a smile.
The next day Remus was feeling much better. Whatever drugs the Muggles had given him had left his system and the wounds on his chest where the car hit him now blended in with others he had received over the years.
The Head Healer had been to see him and was more than willing to release Remus the next morning. Remus realised it was probably more to do with the full moon in four days. They had been giving him his daily dose of Wolfsbane and knew he had somewhere he could safely secure himself, having done so for years.
So on his last evening in St. Mungo's Remus sat propped up in bed reading the Daily Prophet's headlines and filling out a particularly difficult crossword.
The door at the end of the ward swung open and Remus looked up in interest.
At the far end of the room stood a witch in dark red robes. She scanned the room; parchment clasped in her hand. Before a Healer could approach her, she began to stride down the ward. It wasn't until she was almost upon him that he recognised her.
"Oh, Remus," she said, flinging her arms around the recovering man. "I knew it was you. I mean, it had to be, didn't it? When I saw the file, I mean..." She pulled back finally, her face beaming. "I could just kill Neville for not telling me!"
"I doubt I've felt so missed in my life," Remus beamed as another old student took a place at his beside. "But it's not Neville's fault, I asked him not to say."
"But why? Surely you didn't think we be mad at you or..."
"There are other reasons people don't want to be found, Hermione," Remus answered softly and was surprised by the suddenly tearful expression filling Hermione's face.
"Yes," she said softly, pulling at the sleeve of her robes. "I guess you're right. It's just difficult for those left behind to figure out what they might be." She took a calming breath before looking up again, her smile back in place, "but you're here now and I'm so delighted, Remus."
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