Fai glanced out the window--or at least tried. In his mind, his nonexistent eye glanced out the window. But in truth, nothing was there. Just blackness. He never thought the blackness would ever become real-it had always been figurative, in his heart. The darkness, the emptiness…he was used to it, so why did it matter so much? Why was this particular failure, this particular reality, so difficult to bear? His remaining cerulean eye squinted shut in attempt to barricade the flow of tears that were threatening to spill forth. He bit his lip, his newly acquired incisors drawing blood, concentrating so hard on bringing up the mask he had, so far, easily been able to slide on at a moments notice. No matter how hard he tried, it wasn't coming. Why, dammit! He condoned himself, bringing his knees to his chest and pressing his forehead against them. Why would this failure matter?

Because, he thought, I didn't fail just me this time. I failed them all: Sakura, Kurogane, Syaoran. Especially Syaoran.

Go ahead as you waste your days with thinking
When you fall everyone stands
another day and you've had your fill of sinking
with the life held in your...
Hands are shaking cold
These hands are meant to hold

Speak to me

when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know ya do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along
Move along

Kurogane leaned his forehead against the doorframe, debating whether to risk bothering Fai if he was sleeping. His hand finally made the decision for him, turning the handle and gently pushing the door open. He had been expecting Fai to be asleep; when he had finally woken up from his transformation he had been dazed, distant…to the point that he refused to see anyone, locking himself away in his room. The pain, the hate, the disappointment and the fear in his blue eye was like an arrow in Kurogane's heart: Fai loathed him for saving his life. Now, when Kurogane opened the door for the first time in days, he wasn't sure what to expect. But the sight of the lithe blonde curled up in a ball on his bed, sobbing his heart out wasn't it at all.

So a day when you've lost yourself completely
Could be a night when your life ends
Such a heart that will lead you to deceiving
All the pain held in your...
Hands are shaking cold
Your hands are mine to hold

Speak to me

when all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through
Move along

He was caught. Fai's head jerked up at the sound of the door opening, and his eye met Kurogane's deep scarlet ones, and he was caught without his mask in place. The sight of him seemed to catch Kurogane somewhat by surprise as well, because his eyes widened, though only slightly. A knowing expression fell over Kurogane's face, one of sympathy that Fai had rarely seen. Fai didn't know what to do: he was frozen, with no fake smile to hide behind, and there was nothing he could do. Slowly Kurogane made his way toward the bed, as though treading on thin ice. The silence was tense between them—Fai would have run if he could, but his eye was locked with Kurogane's. The expression on the blonde's face caused Kurogane to stop his moving closer; Fai looked like a scared kitten, his eye wide and afraid. It was a pure fear, a fear of being real, and Kurogane realized just how much Fai used to live inside his own mind instead of reality. "You know…" he started, his eyes going back to their normal semi-glaring state, "you know that what you've worked your way up too. This…state you're in is all of your own doing." He waved his hand vaguely in Fai's direction, as if this motion would demonstrate his point. A sense of confusion added to Fai's already frightened expression, even though he knew exactly what Kurogane was talking about. With a quick glance at the blonde, the ninja continued. "You've faked it this long, Fai. Surely…Sakura and Syaoran are broken. They don't know what to do, what to think. They're worried sick about you, locked up like this without eating. They're just kids, Fai. They need us to…" he paused and glanced over at Fai, who was still watching him, but tears were welling up in his eyes. Kurogane noticed this, and strode over to him in two quick strides, grabbing Fai by the shoulders and shaking him slightly. "You have to be strong again Fai! You're hurting them even more! Stop thinking about yourself for a switch, and worry about the kids!" Slowly, Fai looked up to meet Kuro's gaze, his blue eye an almost clear, watery color. One hand slowly reached up to touch Kurogane's cheek before falling away, and Fai's face twisted into a grimace as he roughly jerked out of the ninja's grasp. "It's wrong of me, I know…but…I don't know what else to do." Kurogane turned away, grabbing angrily at the door handle and yanking it open. "Figure it out yourself, since you don't seem to want my help."

When all you got to keep is strong
Move along, move along like I know you do
And even when your hope is gone
Move along, move along just to make it through

(Move along)
(Go on, go on, go on, go on)
Right back what is wrong
We move along

Authors Notes: yeah, so…really, not exactly what I wanted. Actually, I'm planning on re-doing it and coming out with a second version. Please review and tell me what it needs! For some odd reason I had a really hard time working on Fai's depression. I couldn't get the emotion across. Oh well. –shrugs-