Author's
Note: Hey… I'm back! Sorry for the wait… my computer crashed
down, and I was recovering some files…
By popular demand, I'm
going to do a rant on Cartoon Network and Disney. It was easy to
think of stuff for Disney, but… boy, was it hard to think of stuff
for Cartoon Network.
On wit da story!
Spongebob's Rant
Okay, so as you all know… there are three major cartoon channels. PBS Kids does not count, because nobody likes that channel anyway. Plus, they always beg you for money… but that's not until another time. The point is, there are three major cartoon channels; Nickelodeon (the one I'm in), Cartoon Network (the one they canceled Teen Titans in) and Disney channel (The one where they always show these old movies and come out with new sucky ones every month.)
Sigh… where to begin… Disney channel does seem like the easiest one to make fun of, so…
Here we go!
My main point of making fun of this channel: Phil of the Future. This show is about a boy and his family who gets transported to the year 2005 or whatever, and can't get back. First of all, how can you tell me that they're from the future, but yet they don't have some gadget that can automatically fix their time-traveling RV? And have ya'll seen that episode where his parents get a ticket? How are they just gonna tell the police that they've been drinking, get a ticket, and think that the officer gave them tickets to some ballet (or whatever it was… I haven't watched that show in a LOOONG time after that episode…)! You'd think that since they were from the future, they would've studied this year already! And you already know that Phil like Kelly! (Spell check won't let me spell the name correctly…) And we all know how Disney has a habit of making movies of its TV shows. I can already see it… Phil of the Future: The movie. What's the plot? Phil finally realizes his love for Kelly… I mean, hey! They already made a movie like that with Kim Possible!
Speaking of Kim Possible…
Second Point: Kim Possible. All right. This girl can do anything (except for cook and pass her driver's test). She goes out and saves the world with her best friend Ron, and still manages to maintain her spot as captain on the cheerleading team. Okay. (Long and impending silence.) You know… there's nothing I can say about this actually. I don't blame Kim for this… I blame her parents! How can parents just watch as their kid goes off to save the world and probably get blown up by psychos! Sure, she a professional and stuff, but… the whole getting blown up by psychos? Yeah… that's discouraging.
Third Point: Suite life of Zack and Cody. Isn't that cute? They use the word "suite" as a substitute for the word "sweet," because they live in a hotel. How adorable… not! The boys are far from adorable, because they always either wreck the hotel in some way, or drive the owner-guy mad. If I was the owner-guy, I would've thrown them out already. They could come back for visits if they wanted, but if they messed up the hotel again… out goes the PG rating.
Fourth, fifth, and all other points: All those so called "original" TV shows that Disney keeps popping out like babies. Two words: Stop it! Life with Derek- stop it! Naturally Sadie- stop it! That other show that should be coming out in April-stop it! I have seen enough of the other shows to know when I've had enough. But you know what? I just love how they always say the word "original." It's original all right… originally crappy.
To tell you the truth, I don't even watch Disney channel anymore. I used to, but now…
And now, onto Cartoon Network…
First point: Ben 10. Number one, why does this title have to rhyme? Number two, uh… dang it, out of ideas already. So much for my plan of having ten reasons on why this show sucks. Anyway, there's this one thing that kind of disappointed me. In the beginning, when they were showing previews for this show (previews where Ben didn't talk), he looked like a deep-voiced teen with a problem or somethin.' After watching an episode, I found out that he isn't a deep voiced dude with a problem. So much for my dreams… not that I'm gay or anything.
Second point: Code Lyoko. Why don't they just tell their parents and everyone else what they're doing? It's not like they're superheroes or something! I mean, superheroes don't tell their parents in case the evil dudes find out who they are or where they go. Too late for that! In this show, this Xana guy already knows everything! If they just told everyone the truth, it would make their lives easier! Sure, they're parents might try to stop them, but they could always say that they've done it before and lived. Then, they might get grounded… but they can always say that if they don't go to that world thingy, then the whole word will be destroyed and blah, blah, blah…
Third point: Robot boy. Don't like it. That's all there is to say.
Fourth point: Foster's Home for Imaginary friends. If they're imaginary friends, how come we can see them? If everyone can see them, then they aren't imaginary friends!
Fifth point: Krypto the super dog. This show is an embarrassment to the old comics. Krypto and his owner are stupid. End of story.
Well, that's all there is to say about Cartoon Network. That's all there is to say about Disney too. Hopefully, there won't be anymore stupid cartoon making. Here's a message to all TV show makers out there: Before you send those ideas of yours over the air waves, please, think it through CAREFULLY.
End
Well, that's it. The next chappie. If ya'll have any other ideas, just send 'em in. I forgot all of 'em after they were deleted. Reviews are appreciated. Be sure to leave one on your way out.
R&R pleez! Reviewers get ice cream!