His door was shut and no noise could be heard from behind it. Knox Overstreet knew why. "Charlie?" Knox's soft voice echoed in the empty hallway. "Come on, Charlie. Open up." Nothing. No response. Not even the angered sounds of tears. Knox looked at the rest of the Dead Poets Society. "Nothing." He shrugged and walked off. Neil's death had been a blow to all of them, but Charlie was taking it harder than the rest.
Charles Rutherford Dalton and Neil Andrew Perry had become friends almost from the moment they met their first year at Welton. They were roommates and immediate best friends. They shared the same sense of distorted humor and ability to draw people, mostly girls, their direction. Their charisma made people love them and love them unconditionally, except for the two people the young men wanted to unconditionally love them above all.
Misters Dalton and Perry were both overwhelming men who controlled and ruled their sons with an iron fist and decided their sons' futures. Mr. Dalton wanting his son to be a banker and Mr. Perry wanting his son to be a doctor, futures neither boy wanted to have. So, it was not lost on the boys on what they had in common and why they hit it off so well. They had learned to complain to each other about their overbearing fathers, giving each other advice they both knew they'd never take.
But, Charlie never thought it would end this way.
Gerard Pitts and Steven Meeks stood quiet against Todd Anderson's doorframe. Todd had his door open, but sought solace in his room. Quietly, Pitts moved and sat on the now empty bed that was Neil's. "How are you doing, Todd?"
Todd shrugged. "Wh...when I first came here, Neil befriended me from the start and…I've n...n…never been accepted like that." He looked across the hall. "Still nothing from Nuwanda?"
Meeks shook his head. "Nothing."
Todd stared at the closed door. He admired Charlie Dalton's ability to overcome anything. His ability to conform without conforming. Neil and Charlie both had the ability to be strong despite the weakness of others around them. Both had the ability to smile through the pain and torment they endured. Both were leaders and yet, Todd never saw one try to lead the other. They just simply wanted the same thing out of life and, even though it seemed in two different ways, they lived life the same way, going down the same path and Todd envied that.
And now...now...one beloved friend was dead and the other one was distant.
Todd wondered if things would ever be as they were before Neil's death. He looked at Pitts and saw the same thought in Pittsie's eyes. No. Nothing will ever be the same. Todd thought as Knox made his way in. Knox sat next to Pitts and shrugged. "I just don't know what to do. He won't respond"
Todd stood up and made his way to Charlie's door. "N...Nuwanda?" He quietly asked.
The others watch in surprise as Charlie opens the door. "It's not fair. It's just not fucking fair." He turned back to his room, Todd following. Charlie looks at Todd as he closed the door. "Why would Neil..." Charlie stopped, fearful that tears would fall.
Todd shrugged as he sat on Cameron's bed. "I...I don't know."
Charlie looked at Todd as he repositioned himself on the radiator. He saw Todd's face. "I know I shouldn't sit on the radiator, but it's keeping me warm." He sighed. "At least on the outside. On the inside...Todd, I'm cold. I just...I want to hate Neil for killing himself. My first thought was 'They lied to us. Not Neil. He's much to strong willed and too willing to live for now. Too much to live for. Not Neil. It's some other kid who happened to be named Neil Perry.'" He sighed. "I can't even cry for him. He was my best fucking friend and I can't cry for him. What type of friend does that make me, Todd?"
Todd was taken aback by Charlie's openess. "I...I don't know. But...you and Neil were...I'm sure he..." Todd lost his thought, afraid of saying the wrong thing.
"What type of friend doesn't cry for their own best friend who..."
"You're in denial?" Todd ventured. "M...m..maybe you feel if you don't cry, it's not real." Todd cringed as Charlie looked at him.
"Now I know why Neil adored you, Todd."
"What?"
"Neil thought that you...if given the shot, you could be the strength that all of us need, if we ever needed it. Why do you think he pushed you like he did?"
Todd sat back. He never saw himself as strong. He looked at Charlie and smiled. "I hope I can be that rock you need."
Charlie grinned. "You already have been."
I know that this is short...and it may be a one shot...we'll see what the story holds and what YOU, the reader, wants done with it. I hope you enjoyed it.