Anya couldn't get Damian's hurt expression out of her mind. His thoughts were jumbled as always but Anya figured he was hurt from her sudden disappearance right after his joke. Still, she walked into school knowing whatever was going to happen today… was going to happen. She tried to make Bond give her another vision of the future but all she managed to get out of him was the fact that her Papa was making her favorite food for dinner.

First things first was Becky and her interrogation which lasted all the way to the classroom.

"You can't just run off like that and disappear! I was worried sick about you Anya!" Becky pulled her into a tight hug before they entered class.

Anya sighed. "I'm sorry, Becks I really am." She hugged her back tightly. "Can we sit somewhere else today?" She tightened her hold around her bag as they made their way toward class.

Becky wasn't at all surprised by Anya's decision and merely nodded. "Of course! Honestly, Desmond is an idiot." She fumed as Anya stayed quiet.

When they walked in they sat further in the back completely ignoring the trio that was sitting in their usual spot. They looked at the girls in utter shock. Becky didn't even look in their general direction and Anya didn't dare meet Damian's gaze, she couldn't help but feel bad when she realized he looked like a wounded puppy.

Becky turned and whispered to Anya. "You know I told off Desmond yesterday and all that but honestly what he said is the stuff he usually says whenever he's joking, what happened?" Did he hurt Anya before class? Because if he did I'm going to beat the shit out of him! Tonitrus bolts be damned!!

Anya quickly shook her head. "No- I- It's complicated right now Becks." Anya gave vague gestures with arms.

"Anya you cried and ditched school because Desmond made a joke about your grades, how is that complicated?" Becky crossed her arms.

Anya flinched and shifted around her seat. "I- Okay maybe it's not that complicated."

"Yeah, no shit."

"Listen Becks I-"

"Everyone in your seats, class is about to start." The teacher walked in signaling the start of class.

"We can talk during lunch," Becky whispered to which Anya merely nodded.

Unfortunately class was anything but distracting. Cecile Hall was practically eating up the newest development and all Anya could do was ignore it. Some were even upset on Damian's behalf which Anya would have laughed at had things not been as tense as they were right now.

They remained as tense as they could be seeing as Anya was never given a moment of peace. It was like the universe was preventing her from doing so. Everyone in Cecile Hall knew she had a moment of vulnerability and correlated it to being Damian's fault. And they all knew the scion looked like a wounded puppy the rest of the day right after she disappeared. What they didn't know is that they saw each other briefly before Anya officially left the school yesterday and they didn't know he had seen her talking to his older brother. Anya knew Demetrius was coming thanks to Bond but she completely forgot about that due to her stress. She was having random outbursts now and saying things she didn't even mean. It sucked.

And yet here she was not clarifying anything or clearing up the misunderstanding!

Out of everyone, it seemed only Becky was questioning it. She knew Anya better than anyone else after all. Anya doesn't have moments like that, if she had gotten hurt over what Damian said she would have insulted him back and a fight would have ensued or at the very least an argument that would have resulted in them both apologizing to each other later. Which has happened before.

This was different.

Anya's guilt was eating at her as she continued to not address the issue. Heck, she's sure she never even explained herself to her parents back when she told them she hated them. Then again they never asked if she meant it or if she still felt that way. Even their thoughts weren't giving anything away. She kept squirming around in her seat feeling impatient. Unable to concentrate on the lecture, she's sure this is going to bite her later. She felt overwhelmed, so overwhelmed that she couldn't even process anyone's thoughts anymore. She knew Cecile Hall was still talking about her sudden disappearance from yesterday but the words weren't registering in her mind.

Some were positive.

Others were negative.

And some were indifferent.

But that was the extent to what she could tell.

"Anya are you okay?" Becky whispered to her.

Anya merely nodded. "Yeah, I'm okay."

She wasn't and Becky wasn't buying it but she also didn't want to overwhelm Anya with all the questions swarming in her head. Of course, unbeknownst to her Anya already knew what those questions were because she could unfortunately read her mind.

It was probably around lunchtime when Anya finally managed to unload some of her feelings.

Becky knew the boys would eat in the cafeteria so she dragged Anya elsewhere to eat and to get her to open up. "Alright spill the beans." They sat in a secluded area by the garden.

Anya took a deep breath. "It's a misunderstanding."

"Huh? A what?"

"I didn't actually cry over his joke, I know it's a joke, it's just that..." Anya clutched the end of her skirt.

Becky stared at her expecting her to elaborate and when she didn't she merely shook her head in disbelief. "Anya, how do you cry and run away, disappear for the whole day and it's all just one big misunderstanding?" She doesn't want to give her best friend a hard time but this wasn't making any sense in her mind.

Anya knew that it didn't make sense. But she kept saying things without meaning to. "I… I know that but…" She trailed off, tears threatening to spill.

Becky set down her fork and placed her arm around Anya as comfort. "Anya, what's wrong? What's really going on?" Anya shook her head to deny anything was happening but again Becky wasn't buying it. "Anya I'm your best friend you can trust me."

That was all Anya needed for the floodgates to open and for her to spill the beans about her parents and how they had a massive fight and how they planned to divorce once Anya graduated and how much she doesn't want her family to separate or get destroyed. "They hate each other now! Everything was so perfect but it all just-!" Anya cried her eyes out on Becky's shoulder.

Becky rubbed circles on her back to soothe her. "Let it all out, Anya."

Anya spent the rest of lunch period crying and eating and crying while eating which was a funny sight in hindsight but it was an emotional moment for Anya.

"I thought that if I became an Imperial Scholar my parents would be so distracted being proud of me that they'd have a moment and not divorce." A lie but Becky didn't need to know about the fact that her Papa was a spy and about Operation Strix. At least not yet anyway…

Will I tell her?

Probably not.

Becky nodded understanding Anya's reasoning. "So that's why you cried when Desmond joked about your grades."

"Yup." Despite that Anya still didn't mean to get upset at him. "I really didn't mean to run away or cry, it just happened and I couldn't stop, people assumed it was over the joke and in hindsight it kinda was but I know he wasn't being malicious, and- how do I even address it?!" If she gave herself a moment to think about it all she had to do was walk up to him and ask to speak alone and then clarify the misunderstanding. That was all she needed to do and yet why was that so hard!?

"Just talk to him, Anya," Becky said, more or else confused about what was stopping Anya from talking to Damian. "Why are you hesitating? Unless… you actually hate him or something."

"I don't!"

"Then just talk to him, seriously he wasn't himself all day yesterday and it was annoying because I like it better when I can make fun of him." Becky sighed, crossing her arms.

Anya felt bad, she was so distracted she realized she hadn't even read his mind once all day. Or maybe she did but his thoughts weren't registering in her mind amongst the clutter of thoughts that was Cecile Hall today. "I don't know why it's so hard for me to talk to him."

Becky raised an eyebrow. "Are you afraid he won't accept your apology? Trust me Anya he'll eat it up if it means being able to talk to you again." Seriously he's been crushing on you for a long time now but you're oblivious to it.

Anya blushed, technically she wasn't oblivious to it, at least not anymore. "I… I guess maybe I am a little afraid." She wasn't, it was just some unseen force preventing her from talking. Or maybe she was scared, but what is the question?

Becky patted her shoulder. "Just talk to him, or don't, regardless of what you decide I'm here for you! And don't worry about your parents, they'll always love you no matter what Anya."

Anya felt like crying again. She knew they did love her otherwise they wouldn't be at least civil to each other for her sake. Despite that Anya was taking their decision to divorce badly. At the very least if she wasn't going to apologize to Damian she should apologize to her parents for her outburst.

The bell rang, and lunch was over.

-

Anya spent the rest of the day avoiding Damian like the plague. She was unable to go up to him to talk and clear the air. And it wasn't like there weren't any opportunities, there were plenty, so many in fact that they were created by Damian himself. He tried and failed to get her to acknowledge him or to be alone with her. The majority never resulted since Becky was always tagging along and made sure Anya was never alone. It was obvious to her that Anya wasn't going to talk to him so as her best friend she'll do whatever it takes to help Anya avoid him. It was getting tiring having to dodge him everywhere and it didn't help that Ewen and Emile were getting involved.

Anya sighed as she looked out the window from the bus. It was a workout today but she felt much lighter having vented to Becky about what was going on. She thanked the stars Becky wasn't judgmental about it and promised to keep quiet. She didn't know what she'd do if she didn't have Becky in her life, they've been inseparable since first grade. A smile graced her face, the first one in a while.

When the bus dropped her off the slight heaviness in her heart came back but it wasn't as heavy as before. She walked towards her house and up the steps. When she walked in she was surprised to see her parents talking in rather hushed voices in the kitchen.

"Oh, Anya you're back," Yor said, smiling at her.

Loid had a smile of his own. "How was school today?"

Hell. "It was alright." Anya let her backpack slide off of her. "What's for dinner?" She looked between the two.

Yor and Loid shared a look as if having a silent conversation. Extremely silent as their thoughts gave nothing away.

"Anya there's something we need to discuss first." Loid began to explain.

Anya looked between the two. "I'm listening."

"We were wondering… who would you rather live with? Me or your Papa?" Yor said although her smile wavered slightly. "Whether you choose me or Loid, the other will always be your parent and you can visit us any time."

Anya felt her breath hitch.

"I told Yor everything including your adoption and… Operation Strix which is-" Loid was interrupted.

"I know about Operation Strix." Anya found herself talking before she could think. "I've known since the beginning." She looked at her Papa. Tears brimming in her eyes.

Loid looked utterly shocked as Anya began to tremble. "How?"

"..."

"Anya?" Yor placed a hand on her shoulder.

A few strands of tears rolled down her cheeks. "I… I can… I can read minds… I've known Papa was a spy and that Mama was an assassin from the very beginning." She furiously wiped away her tears as she began to talk about her past as a lab experiment and how she lied about her age to get adopted by Loid and what she knew about Operation Strix and the Plan A and Plan B schemes. And that she purposefully set them up because Mama being an assassin was exciting to her child-like mind. She shared how since they became a real family she never thought anything bad would ever happen and her fear of being abandoned. "PLEASE DON'T DO THIS TO ME! I KNOW YOU TWO STILL LOVE EACH OTHER, PLEASE TALK IT OUT!"

There was silence as the weight of her confession settled in. Anya didn't even care if they thought she was a freak. It was like everything that had happened meant nothing anymore. Because if she didn't have her family then what's the point?

A tense long silence was broken by their thoughts.

Of course I love Yor, I love her but…

"Papa…"

I love Loid more than I hate him but…

"Mama…"

I can't trust her anymore.

I can't trust him anymore.

Anya let out a sob as she ran toward her room, not even silencing her sobs. She locked her door ignoring the way her parents desperately begged her to open it and let them in. She can't, not anymore. There was no hope for the Forger family anymore. At one point Bond joined in with tears of his own. Nothing will ever be the same for Anya. She was well aware that not everything will go back to the way it was. But she had hoped it would get better over time. That her Mama would be fine with her husband being a spy from W.I.S.E, that her Papa didn't care about her Mama's job and that he'd make sure he could continue to have his family even after Operation Strix comes to an end.

Anya wiped her tears and hugged Bond tightly. She knew her parents were still by her door. Their thoughts were loud.

I'll have to try unconventional means to make Operation Strix work. I know you're reading my mind, Anya, I just want you to know I don't want to put any more pressure on you.

Anya buried her face in Bond's fur. She had no objections to this. It was better this way as Damian was under the impression she hated him. And she couldn't find it in herself to talk to him. Maybe I'm not really afraid, maybe this is for the best. For us to have distance. Now that her Papa was aware that she knew, it changed everything. My friendship with Becky won't be affected, especially if I do tell her the truth eventually.

But Damian will hate me.

He'll never forgive me if he finds out.

It was all so simple back in first grade. She thought world peace would be achieved by talking but it was obvious now she was being extremely naive. Even now she was still naive. Her stomach growled on cue. She groaned while still having her face buried in Bond's fur.

Loid knocked on the door once more. "I'll make your favorite food for dinner Anya… also Spy Wars is on."

Anya sighed and got up from her bed while being followed by Bond. She slowly opened the door and ignored the looks her parents gave her as she walked past them. The television was on and just in time Spy Wars started playing. Taking her place on the couch Bond sat beside her taking a small nap. No new visions, it seems the future was still uncertain for her family. As she watched her favorite show her guilt came back in full force. It didn't help that the episode consisted of a misunderstanding between two people that love each other. Since when did Spy Wars have this level of romance drama? How does she not remember this? She internally groaned watching as the pair cleared it up and promised they'd be together for all of eternity. The way they hugged each other, the kiss. Suddenly it wasn't them but Anya and Damian. She imagined the loving way Damian would look at her as he declared his love to her and promised to always be together. She blushed and clutched the pillow beside her.

When did I start loving you so much?

She was startled at the question she asked herself.

Were they even friends?

She doubted he even considered her a friend. Sure they were cordial but that's about it. And his friends didn't insult her as much as always and Becky would bicker with them but it never seemed like she was genuinely angry. Maybe they were friends but she was too dumb to realize. Becky was right; she was still oblivious to a lot of things. However, Damian's feelings for her were something she noticed around three years ago. When the concept of romance finally clicked in her mind. It was on Valentine's day too, how fitting. He privately gave her a red rose and some chocolate-covered peanuts.

"It doesn't mean anything okay!"

She rolled her eyes at that, sure it didn't. It was a fond memory. She went home and it just suddenly clicked in her mind and when she asked Becky the infamous 'how do you know when someone likes you' question it just hit her like a truck. She realized he had feelings for her, he just won't admit them. And knowing made her see him in a different light and make her feel things too. She couldn't pinpoint the exact moment she started having feelings but she could pinpoint when she became aware of them.

Aware of his feelings.

It made things awkward for her until she managed to start having normal conversations without being weird.

"Anya dinner is ready."

"Coming."

She got up to eat with the thought still in her mind.

Keeping my distance will be hard.

--

I'm back!

If anyone didn't know I went on a small break because of my massive authors block

I bring good news and bad news

The good news is I made some progress

The bad news is, it wasn't enough for me to go back to weekly uploads so unfortunately I'll just be uploading what I have on hand and if I catch up I catch up lol

Authors block is terrible I'm telling ya

Also funny story I saw another damianya story posted with the same title as mine

And let me tell ya I had a heart attack because I was like:

SINCE WHEN DID I UPDATE?!

LOL

But nah turns out it's just another story with the same title

Anyway we got some angst today with anya but at least our girl becky is there to help her!

Until the next chapter~