5

Chapter 550 Biker Girl Once More

"

As Steve guided the bike through the gentle hills around Charming, Tara was transported back to those carefree high school days with Jax. Love had been new and life had been good. She thought her love for Jax was passionate romantic love because they were having sex. She'd made the basic mistake of confusing sex with love.

It was only much later that she realized that it was friend love with sex. Her love for Jax wasn't any less real; it was just not the soul searing passionate love she read about in romance novels. After so many years filled with wrong guys, she began to doubt romance novel love existed outside of fiction.

When she returned to Charming, she hoped she might feel romantic love for Jax. She thought seeing him again would stir it up now that she was older. It hadn't. She'd felt a surge of feeling for him, but it was seeing an old friend again. If she were honest with herself if he'd shown any interest in her at all, she would have gotten together with him hoping that romantic love would come to her. She was grateful for the gentle way he'd told her that there was never going to be romance between them.

Her lack of passionate soul searing love for him was why she wasn't jealous that he was with Scarlett. Jax and Scarlett were good together and she was happy that he had found someone. She did envy the loving relationship the two of them had. She wanted that for her.

Steve was saner than Kohn, but that wasn't saying much. Kohn set the sanity bar pretty low, but he was confident and secure within himself. Joshy to use his revolting nickname was insecure especially when he compared himself to Jax. The truth was Joshy could never measure up to Jax in any way despite the lies she told him to the contrary. Perhaps his ATF training had helped him figure out that she was lying and that only fueled the crazy.

Joshy always felt inferior to her because she made more money and had a higher status job than he did. She hadn't cared about that but it was a constant source of insecurity for him. He tried to compensate by putting her down and trying to make her feel stupid whenever he had the chance. Damn there had been so many red flags, but she'd been color blind.

At least Eric was a step up from Kohn. He was a giant mistake with less deadly consequences. She needed love to complete her life and Eric was single, attractive with a certain amount of charm.

How the hell was she so naive that she didn't pick up on his being gay? She'd been too eager for a relationship and had settled for a man that didn't want to touch her. That's what happened when you watched too many romance movies on Hallmark; it normalized a relationship with no sexual chemistry.

She thought he was taking things slow because he wanted their relationship to work out. She'd been delusional. No other way to put it. Now she knew he didn't touch her because he must have found her repulsive. Why did he even bother to date her? Could Dr. Namid have been behind that? But why?

Now that time he wanted to visit a petting zone took on a whole new meaning. Maybe he was looking for his next co-star. That's what happens to sad desperate women they ended up with someone like Kohn or Eric. You get stalked and he tries to kill you or he's gay and also has sex with barnyard animals. It's tough being single. She thought she'd avoided all the pitfalls of dating by avoiding online dating. Turns out meeting in real life could be just as bad and dangerous.

Steve was secure. He didn't ask to be compared to Jax. He was confident and even tempered while Joshy had been volatile. By the time she discovered his dangerous temper; it was nearly too late. It was such a relief to be with someone without a hair trigger temper.

Steve was no Jax Teller consolation prize or some pale imitation. He was comfortable in his own skin and that was a rare characteristic these days. He liked the MC and hanging around the clubhouse sometimes. Jax wanted him to patch in, but Steve was skeptical. He liked riding his motorcycle but wasn't sure that he was interested in belonging to the club.

That wasn't a deal breaker for Tara. Far from it, it might give them a future. She pretended to be on board with the MC back when she and Jax were together, but she was fearful that Jax would end up dead or in prison because of his involvement. She could see the men of SAMCRO more clearly now. With the exception of Clay, none of them had managed to make a long term relationship work.

She'd dated her share of medical professionals but felt they only had work in common. When she wasn't at the hospital, she wanted to think of other subjects. Steve was well read and was interesting. Talking to him was enjoyable. She was allowed to have an opinion that wasn't a mirror image of his and they could have discussions about their differences without it turning violent.

Feeling his body warm pressed against hers as they road along made her remember how much she'd loved riding on the back of Jax's bike feeling the wind in her face and that carefree feeling you get when there isn't a car surrounding you keeping you from experiencing nature.

After more than an hour of riding, Steve pulled over and parked under a large tree. They spread out an old blanket from Tara's house and took out the sandwiches, chips and cold drinks from Steve's saddlebags that Tara had packed for their lunch.

"It's good to be back on a bike again," Tara said.

"Yeah, I like riding in the country. It's better than hiking."

Tara laughed.

They ate their ham and cheese sandwiches and drank their bottles of Coke. They talked about politics and the collapse of crypto. Both were amazed that people thought it was a great way to invest money.

Afterwards, they snuggled together on the blanket enjoying the warm day as summer turned to fall. It was a perfect relaxing moment.

A few hours later, they returned to Tara's house. Tara had gotten a steaks Steve to barbeque on her father's old Weber grill out in the backyard. Earlier that morning, she'd made Coleslaw and some cheesy Garlic bread that needed a quick toast on the grill. For desert, she was serving Angel food cake with strawberries and whipped cream.

They ate outside on the new redwood patio table and chairs she'd gotten the prior week. She was slowly fixing up the house, but the only room that was really nice was her bedroom.

They tried watching a movie but ended up making out instead. He made her feel wanted without putting undue sexual pressure on her. It felt so nice for a man to find her attractive again.

"You know I have a new toothbrush," Tara said when the movie they didn't watch was over.

"Unused?" he asked, his lips quirking into a smile.

"Yes," she said. "It could be yours tonight."

"And what do I have to do for this prize?"

"I'll show you," she said taking him by the hand and leading him to her bedroom.