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ஜ Chapter 18: Revelations ஜ
For a second the blond could do nothing but blink at the response.
He... knew? Izaya knew something useful about their situation that he didn´t tell him yet? Shizuo was confused to say the least, he thought he already knew everything there was- and yet Izaya said he had some sort of crucial information?
Since when? Did he knew what he was speaking about all along? Was it something important? The way Izaya looked at him made him think it was something really important that Izaya shouldn't have hidden- it made Shizuo frown.
Silence dominated the scene as the woman kept waiting patiently for the raven to continue. It was a heavy silence, feeling as though it was pressing all air out of Izaya´s lungs.
Clearing his throat he eyed both of them warily- right now he wasn´t quite sure what to expect of the blond. Ever since they met, Shizu-chan did say he didn´t want to know whatever Izaya was planning on doing, but keeping information like this from him he couldn´t ascertain whether he would get mad or just take it like good news-
"...I told you about my sisters right?" he started slowly, seeing as the blond wasn´t saying anything so far. "What do you think I did in between the time they got infected and the time they died?" The blond blinked, remembering how Izaya had told him about her- he had had a nightmare about both of them.
From what Izaya told him she had been bitten by a zombiefied dog, hadn´t she? And his first sister... she died from the virus and didn´t even turn into a zombie.
"... probably comforted them...?" he tried, he did realize by now that Izaya had loved his siblings rather than hated like he always had pretended to, there was no way he would just leave her behind or anything- the raven shook his head however.
"I´m not the type to just accept fate like that, Shizu-chan. You should know me well enough."
Accepting fate?
Shizuo didn´t know what the flea was even getting at- he said he had some unknown important information about this whole zombie shit- what did that have to do with his sister?
"So, what did you do?"
Groaning and the sound of fists hitting the metal tent from outside filled the moment as the raven remained quiet, thinking how he should start to explain this.
"Kururi was one of the first to get infected, as you know," As thought, it would be best to explain from the start. "I always kept track of everything those doctors tried, what they said, how they analyzed this "virus". I did what I could best, gathered data and researched for myself. I did the same after Marie got infected and researched."
True this sounded a lot more like the flea. The blond frowned a bit at the direction this was going. What the flea was talking about had been a long time ago- just what was it that he felt the need for to explained detailed? Was he trying to avoid getting him mad?
Just for a split second the blond felt put off- he shared everything with the flea, these past days they had watched out for each other and experienced so many different things- the prospect of the flea having hidden something all along nagged at him.
"You want to create an antidote," the woman suddenly stated out of the blue, crossing her arms in front of her body while the blond could only blink stupidly at the statement.
Wait, what?
The raven glanced at the blond, somehow he didn´t even care too much about whether Kujiragi thought this piece of information was useful. What seemed to matter way more was how the blond reacted to this.
"Ah, Kasane-chan now you spilled the secret," he chuckled softly, yet nervous, still looking at Shizu-chan, "to be completely honest... I think I already found something you could call a formula to create said antidote."
For a second it was just really quiet. The woman´s eyes widened just the slightest bit.
"To-"
To be honest Shizuo didn´t even know how to react to that kind of newsflash- A formula for an antidote... that meant, Izaya knew how to return those things to the way they were?!
For a second something welled up in his chest that he could only define as anger- because Izaya fucking knew and Izaya could have saved them already- he could have just-
...
No.
But then he remembered what Izaya had told him before. In the van. He had a nightmare because of his sister. He had shot up from his sleep, he looked really devastated about it-
He didn´t create the antidote yet, if he had, then he wouldn´t have let his sister die. Had someone asked Shizuo a week ago, he would have thought Izaya would just abandon his sisters without a second thought, but by now... Shizuo knew Izaya had been honest when he told him about his sisters.
So whatever he did find out, he found it out too late.
Feeling the feeling of anger fleeting away steadily he sat down on the ground as well. For once in his life he wanted to calm down and listen to the end.
"What exactly do you mean by formula?" he found himself asking his voice sounding way calmer than he felt.
The raven seemed fidget as he kept looking at the blond.
"I don´t really know how to explain since you both don´t really have any knowledge in this regard. But let´s just say I think I found the recipe to create an antidote." Somehow Izaya's tongue felt heavier and heavier with each word he spoke. He couldn´t shake off this feeling that he was betraying the blond. It was odd considering they had only teamed up because of the zombies. "Of course there is no guarantee it will actually work, but I think it´s highly possible," he continued, swallowing dry as the blond didn´t respond.
This behavior of Shizu-chan, being calm like this- he didn´t know what to make of it. If he were angry he could understand it, if her were glad he could understand it too, but being so ... reserved about it, it put him off. The odd thought that maybe Shizu-chan was just disappointed him struck him.
"So what you carry around in that bag-" all of a sudden it all made sense- Why Izaya wanted to go to the hospital, why Izaya had always taken care of his bag and why Shizuo heard something click in it when he carried it- "There are there tools in it for the purpose of creating this antidote." The raven nodded solemnly.
"... so the important information you have is the solution to that antidote?" The woman sighed, letting her crossed arms hang down again loosely. "It sounds like a nice make belief goal, but you have my respect for trying so hard."
The raven nodded, he was well aware that what he said sounded way too sweet of a story to be actually true. But it didn´t change the fact that he was saying the truth. He honestly did believe that this solution he had come up with could change the creatures back to the way they were.
"Our paths will be parting by tomorrow morning. While I don´t intend to stay with you two, you did give me fairly valuable information so I won´t take my swords down until the sun rises," the woman continued, relieving the raven at least a bit.
The person that bothered him the most was still remaining as quiet as he had during the whole time he revealed his knowledge...
"Thank you," Shizuo said, looking at the woman for once as he just sat there, still not getting mad or anything.
Izaya really didn´t know what to make of the blond´s reaction to the news.
"Now, if you excuse me," Kijiragi suddenly spoke up, her eyes gleaming reddish, "it´s already late, all of us should be sleeping to recharge our bodies. Do not worry, the swords won´t disappear or anything during the night." And with that statement a dozen of more swords appeared and rammed themselves into the ground, creating something that could only be called... a wall? It definitely divided the tent like save haven into two parts.
"She locked us out," Shizuo commented sounding a tad stupefied, yet not all too surprised.
"... well she is a woman after all, I doubt she wants us to see her sleep. Doesn´t seem like she would get scared on her own either, so..." Izaya, even though he didn´t even see it coming, wasn´t really that surprised about her behavior.
"True."
...
Silence filled the atmosphere as none of the two continued speaking. The raven was still sitting there, fairly close to Shizuo even considering the woman had halved the already small space. His shirt was still shoved up, the wound exposed to fresh air. For now the bleeding had stopped and the blood seemed to start becoming a crust.
He would need band aids for this tomorrow. But more importantly...
For once not really knowing what to say he glanced at the blond who was still being oddly quiet. And yet the silence was just too heavy. He didn't even know what it was, he could care less if the blond was mad or something, but somehow he felt the need to defend himself, to explain why he didn´t say anything- just...
"... ne, are you mad at me?" the blond blinked, not having expected such a direct question.
"You know, because I didn´t tell you I know that sort of thing." The flea looked like he felt... guilty?
...
For not telling him?
"You did say you didn´t want me to tell you what my plan is, but I guess this kind of information... I don´t know, I feel like I should have said it." Fuck his bad conscience. The moment Izaya said the words he knew he shouldn´t have put it that way, honesty was never what others wanted to hear. He should have lied about only having discovered it recently, so recent that he had no chance to tell him- and yet, he felt the need to tell the blond the truth.
"... I'm not mad or anything though." Shizuo said, obviously surprising the flea who had clearly been expecting a different answer. Sure, Shizuo had gotten angry at first for a moment, but he knew already that it had been stupid to feel that way. "You said you aren´t 100% sure it works, right?"
"Yeah, I can´t say it will work with certainty, it´s not like I´m a biochemical scientist or anything fancy like that. I don´t know if what I calculated is actually correct." The blond had thought so, after all, if he really had created something like this or tested it in any way, then he wouldn´t have wasted his time travelling around like this.
"Then it doesn´t make any difference. Whether you had told me or not it wouldn´t have changed a thing about our situation or how we ended up here." After all, all their conversations, their experiences, their conversations, none of that would have changed just because of a slim hope for things to return to normal that might as well be futile.
"Sure, it was sort of odd to hear you have been hiding something from me, but then again I requested that myself, didn´t I? We never pledged to tell each other everything or something like that. We only agreed on teaming up to survive and protect each other... and I think, considering what we went through so far, neither of us has a reason to doubt that."
Somehow it was odd, Izaya didn´t really give a damn about what Shizuo was thinking of him, and yet those words made him feel incredibly relieved.
"Then, let´s make a promise now, to not hide anything anymore," the raven chirped, somehow in a really good mood again. He hadn´t really planned on leaving the blond in the dark so now that everything was settled there was no need to keep anything from the blond. Even more so considering that the world was going to be doomed anyway.
The blond blinked, a bit surprised by such a request.
"... really? I don´t have anything interesting to share you know." Izaya couldn´t be thinking he was hiding something too, right? That didn´t seem to be the case though as the raven nodded.
"I know, but if I really did die it would also be a waste to not have told something important like this to another person, you know, so the information doesn´t get lost."
... when he died?
Somehow this made the blond frown really deep. It made him recall the conversation about how Izaya wanted Shizuo to burn him when he died way too much. It wasn´t even long that he really nearly died after that. It almost seemed like a bad omen to talk about death like this.
And the thought of Izaya telling him everything he knew just in case he died... it left a bitter taste in his mouth.
"You know what? No." The raven blinked a bit surprised that the blond wasn´t all in for it.
"No?" After all, even before Japan was zombified the blond called him a shady flea for his secret scheming and information broking.
"Keep your secrets, and don´t tell them anyone. If you don´t want the information to get lost then you have to survive, you hear me?"
Ah-
So that´s what this was about.
...
Izaya had already realized Shizu-chan seemed to be quite... dependent on him if one could put it that way. The thought of him dying was obviously something that really freaked Shizu-chan out.
He didn´t know whether it was because he thought he would be left all alone, or maybe because he thought he couldn't survive on his own.
... a small tiny voice in the back of his head even stated something ridiculous as the blond seeing him as a friend by now that he definitely wanted to protect.
... that was nonsense of course and yet it somehow had a nice feeling to it.
"... alright," he smiled. There was no need to pry further into that matter.
Glancing at the blond he noticed that he was fidgeting. The past days he noticed the motion a couple time, Shizu-chan just moved his thumb to his lips, just touching them. To Izaya it seemed like an oral fixation. And he would be damned if he didn´t know why he was developing that now.
"Craving a smoke?" he asked with a soft chuckle, attracting the blond´s attention. He paused the motion, removing his hand from his face.
"It´s not like I´m addicted to it or anything, but I sure would love one of those right now," he defended himself, and Izaya really did believe that. With all this shit going on and him not smoking for a couple days he would have shown any serious symptoms if he really were addicted to it.
"Your lungs are probably happy about the change, though," he commented, slipping out of his coat as he spread it behind his back. He was slowly but surely getting tired. Kasane-chan was probably right about what she said. This was a good time to just rest up for whatever was to come tomorrow.
Letting himself lay down on his side softly he sighed content.
This was better than the tree too. The swords were keeping any breeze from making him shiver and get cold, and the size of the tent like emergency house was small enough to actually get warm just by their body heat.
It was really cozy-
"Ne, Izaya..." the raven blinked softly, having just closed his eyes as he glanced at the blond. "One thing I want to know after all," the blond mumbled, laying down on his back as well, head resting upon his crossed arms.
"What is it?"
...
It wasn´t as if Shizuo were mad at Izaya or anything, no, it might have seemed that way to him before, but actually he was just wondering... just what exactly happened back then.
"... about your sister..." he probably wouldn´t get an answer, and he didn´t really crave for one... but...
"What exactly happened after the dog bit her?"
To be continued C:
Now no worries my dear readers xDD Shizuo didn´t get mad C': and they made up pretty quick too~! *0* gosh they are acting so sweet and even though Izaya likes to pretend he doesn't give a fuck about Shizuo and whether he is there or what he thinks about him, he actually does give way too many fucks about it xDD that cutie haha
Now now, next chapter will be a tiny bit sad considering the question Shizuo asked, but hey, it will also be very sweet C: and a bit worrying perhaps xDDD
Guest 2: haha yeah, Shizuo is kidna really attached to flea by now, and I LOVE it xDD I´m so using this later on for some heart tuggingly sweet and sad scene gosh xD I´m glad I made you laugh x'D it was actually intended to be funny but I wondered whether I got the joke across x'D awwww yeah C': even if Izaya doesn´t wanna admit it, he gives a lot more fucks than he pretends to not give xDD oh- SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH silence! OAO Don´t tell everyone the secret! xDD you damn smart cookie gosh x'D I´m torn between being happy my story development is logical enough to be able to draw conclusions from it, and between panicking because you sorta know what´s going to happen eventually x'D oh well C':
Shufflepink: awww thank you! C': I´m enjoying to write this more and more to be honest xD
Name o.o: xDDD ahaha gosh xD no worries C': I don´t plan on killing Izaya... yet- BWAHAHAH na I´m joking C': or... am I? xDD and who doesn´t love a protective shizuo? -squeals xD
Random reader: awwww nuh xD well at least Shizuo took the news in a good way- a lot of readers thought he was gonna flip out or something xD well then, next time something cute may happen C: or maybe the chapter after that xD lets see C':
Also important info, you may have noticed, or maybe you didn´t, but my updating schedule is being changed xD just slightly though C:
Instead of SUNDAYS on which I update really late only always anyway, I will be updating my stories on MONDAYS from now on C: I just realized this fits way better with everything else I gotta do like studying and shit, and as said I end up posting only Monday so often anyway, it´s not even really a change xDD
And hey, that way the hated Monday has something good to it, no? xDDD
So anyway, just leaving this info here so you aren´t waiting each Sunday and wonder why there are no updates C':
Well then, with that being said, see you on MONDAY the 19th~!
On a tiny lil side note- I got nerve inflammation again ;-; fuck my life I swear- I will try to be on time this Monday though 3