Chapter VIII: The final blow! / Mr. 3's ultimate technique!
Zoro and Eric watched as Mario and the remaining members of Baroque Works rather theatrically stared one another down. The captured men were already extremely invested in the outcome of the two opposing parties standoff, so the palpable feeling of hostility in the air did little more than take said feeling of investment to new heights. For better or worse, both of their fates rested squarely on Mario's shoulders now.
On top of that, there were still thin flakes of wax gracefully dancing past each of their faces while drifting every which way from the peak of Mr. 3's melting sculpture. This simple visual touch gave the area surrounding the soon to be battlefield an almost mystical quality.
All of these elements combined to create an exceptionally tense atmosphere which had everyone on edge.
"BWWWAAAAAAAAAAA-AAAAA-AAA-AAAAAAAHHH!"
Well, everyone would've been on edge if Bowser could've stopped himself from blubbering like a spoiled four-year-old.
"Would you pull yourself together already! What are you even crying for?!"
"He clearly isn't doing that by choice, look at the ground beneath him."
Zoro looked where Eric had told him to, and saw a blue circular symbol painted onto the grass under Bowser. The spot where he was laying lined up perfectly with the center of the odd symbol. Zoro then looked over at Miss Goldenweek and noticed she was holding some painting supplies.
"I'm not sure how, but her drawing must be what's forcing him to act this way. I can only assume that by following color theory, she's able to tap into-."
"Mario, if you get rid of the drawing the turtle's on, he'll probably stop crying."
"I SWEAR THAT IF YOU IGNORE ME ONE MORE TIME-!"
As a vein on Eric's forehead bulged out, Mario's face lit up. The short man still wasn't feeling so hot after taking all of those hits from Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine, so the idea of getting Bowser to lend him a hand in this fight sounded pretty good to him. He turned to get rid of the painting, but before he could even take a step in Bowser's direction, Mr. 3 went ahead and threw the first punch of the battle.
"CANDLE LOCK!"
Swish!
As Mario jumped away, he stared at the thick stream of wax which was pouring out of Mr. 3's palm. It bounced off the ground towards him a few times, then ended in a shape that looked exactly like the pillars which had been restraining Zoro and Eric. As the stream retracted back into Mr. 3's body, Mario was led to the very reasonable conclusion that this man must've been made entirely of wax!
...This world was strange.
Without even thinking about it, Mario went to land the same way he usually did after jumping. However, when his feet touched the ground, he was greeted by a very unusual feeling.
Crack!
"Waaaaahhh!"
Mario desperately clutched the small of his back with both hands as tears welled in his eyes. He knew he shouldn't have ignored that pain in his spine earlier!
"Fuhahaha! What a most amusing expression you wear! Once I pin you down, I'll be sure to add it to my collection!" Mr. 3 chuckled as he watched Mario lean backwards to try and ease his pain.
As Mario straightened out his back, he came to a distressing realization. Unless he wanted to become paralyzed from the waist down, he couldn't jump.
HE COULDN'T JUMP.
Oh boy- this was bad.
"CANDLE LOCK!" With a flick of his arm, Mr. 3 sent another stream of wax flying out of his palm.
Seeing this, Mario lifted his arms over his head and tilted his body to one side. He then threw his body in the opposite direction and preformed a long cartwheel to get to safety. It hurt, but not as much as jumping or running would have.
"You're an acrobat as well? Just how many mismatched skills can one midget possess?" Mr. 3 said while furrowing his brow.
Mario wouldn't be able keep doing those sorts of maneuvers for too much longer. He needed to get Bowser back on his feet as soon as possible. He considered his options, and decided that the fastest way to break Bowser free of the symbol's power would be to destroy it with a fireball from a distance. The problem with that was if he threw a fireball right now, then Bowser would get hit by it.
The corners of Mario's mouth were pulled slightly upwards as he opened his hand, created a fireball, and flicked it at the symbol.
Ka-boom!
"HHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTT! HOT-HOT-HOT-HOOOOOT!" Bowser screamed and ran around in circles while attempting to put out the fire burning on his shell.
As Mr. 3 watched this happen, he couldn't help but let his jaw hang open in shock.
"You imbecile! Why are you attacking the only sentient creature on this island who isn't actively trying to murder us?! AND WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING AT?!" Eric said to Zoro, who was cackling like a fiend at his side.
The absurdity of that interaction was simply too much for the swordsman to take. His aching lungs be dammed, he wanted to laugh.
Another moment of panicked running about went by before the flame on Bowser's back was extinguished. As the turtle went to work patting off the remaining ashes stuck to his spikes, he saw Mario snickering to himself behind his white gloved hands. If it had been physically possible, Bowser would've had steam pouring out of his ears right now.
"So, you think lighting people on fire is funny! well why don't I light YOU on fire, THEN WE'LL SEE HOW FUNNY YOU FIND IT!"
As soon as Bowser finished speaking, he began to take a deep breath, which caused a bright yellow light to appear in the back of his throat. Miss Goldenweek jumped into action at this, dipping her brush into the red blob of paint on her palette. She then proceeded to wave her brush around through the air as if there was a blank canvas standing there. A few expertly performed arm movements later, and there was another one of those symbols plastered on the ground directly in front of Bowser.
"COLORS TRAP, TOUGYUU NO AKA."
Ka-boom!
"HOT-HOT-HOT-HOT, HHHOOOOOOOOOTTTTT!" As the fire on Bowser's shell burned anew, he wailed out loudly enough that a couple of birds perched on tree limbs by the clearing's edge took flight.
Contrary to what one might think, Mario had not in fact thrown a second fireball to destroy Miss Goldenweek's painting. What actually happened was right before Bowser shot his fireball at Mario, he had snapped his head downwards so he could see the red symbol at his feet. And to top it off, for what must have been at most a fraction of a second, Bowser's eyes had widened in terror as he realized he was about to literally shoot himself in the foot. Why he hadn't just turned his head to avoid doing such a thing is anyone's guess.
That whole event was odd enough that it snapped Mario out of his giggling fit so he could look at Miss Goldenweek.
"I can't have you or that turtle wrecking Mr. 3's service set. He gets really grouchy whenever somebody messes up his art." She said as she wiped the excess paint on her brush back onto her palette.
"I can still hear you even when you aren't addressing me directly, Miss Goldenweek." Mr. 3 said knowing full well that his associate wouldn't remember that.
Mario thought about what Miss Goldenweek said for a moment before pulling out his chalkboard. After doodling for a couple of seconds, he flipped it towards the girl so she could see a drawing of her face with an equals sign next to it followed by an image of a stopwatch swinging back and forth. She stared at Mario's creation with a faint glimmer of admiration in her eyes.
"I'm impressed by the intricate details that you squeezed into that sketch of me. You seem to have a solid understanding of how to capture the subtle contours of a face without losing their natural form. And for only having one color to work with, you managed to keep the shading of the piece from coming off as flat."
"Aww, Thank you!" Mario said as he closed his eyes and rubbed the back of his head.
"Did you train under someone? Do you know if they work with acrylic paint?"
"WOULD YOU PLEASE QUIT FRATERNIZING WITH OUR ENEMY!?"
Miss Goldenweek let out a resigned sounding sigh before continuing.
"That's right, I can utilize the emotions of colors in my art to control people." She gestured to the spot where her last painting had been. "Like a bull charging at a matador's cape, a red painting will become the only thing someone under its influence can attack. Red is unique amongst the colors for that very reason." As she spoke, she started to dip her brush into the black blob on her palette. "For any of the other colors to have an effect on someone, they must come into direct contact with the drawing I make from them."
Right when Miss Goldenweek finished her sentence, a blaring alarm bell went off inside Dorry's head.
"MMMHHNNNNHHH, MMMMHHHHH!"
Mario turned to look at Dorry and was shocked to see that the giant had already lost more than half of his oversized face to the wax. While Mario had his back turned, Miss Goldenweek's arm became a blur of meticulous movements until-.
Swoosh! -Splat!
Another one of those symbols was printed on the back of Mario's overalls.
"COLORS TRAP, URAGIRI NO KURO."
"Mmhnh!... Mmm Hnn Hnnh?" Whatever Dorry was trying to say was completely indecipherable. All he and everyone else could do was look on at Mario as he stood eerily still, and it turned out that the sight of Mario not doing much of anything was more than one of his observers could take.
"Oi! We've got about a minute left over here! Quit staring off into space and break us out of this thing!" Eric shouted with all of the might his wax-hardened lungs would allow.
"No."
"No? No!? WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO?! We are going to DIE! Be a good little dwarf and melt this sculpture with your fireballs already!"
"No." Mario's voice was void of any of its typical warmth.
"He won't be doing anything to help you now. Not as long as he's under the influence of my betrayal black painting."
Eric looked over at Miss Goldenweek, but couldn't respond to her before Mr. 3 started loudly chuckling.
"Ah Miss Goldenweek, you truly did come through in the end. Despite your shameless lack of punctuality in matters regarding our organization, when you finally start taking things seriously, the results always speak for themself." Mr. 3 looked up at Zoro and Eric with an unbearably condescending grin. "Do tell, how does it feel for you two to see such a close nakama of yours turn their back on you in your hour of need? How tormented are the both of you, knowing that the help you thought was coming has been taken away by a few simple brushstrokes? As you ponder those questions, let the feelings they conjure up bubble to the surface. Let the dread your experiencing show on your faces, and become the masterpieces you were always destined to be! Fuhahahahaha!"
Eric wanted to tell Mr. 3 off with every bone in his body, but he could barely even breathe in his current state.
"I hope you're happy with that stance, push-nails."
For the sake of his frayed vocal cords, Eric fought off the urge to shout again and settled for shooting a nasty glare at Zoro from the corner of his eye. He would've preferred to just turn his head towards him, but that stopped being possible about two minutes ago.
"And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"
"We're about to become statues, yeah? So, we should make sure that the stances we're in look good. You're slouched over 'cause of those balls on your hands, so you should try and straighten your back out."
"...This is truly remarkable. Here I stand, lost in the middle of the Grand Line, slowly being turned into a human-sized candle, and in my final moments I'm being lectured to about how poor my posture is. You can rest easy swordsman, knowing that you are the only man alive who would be foolish enough to scrutinize such a meaningless thing."
"Hey, if you don't care about how bad your statue's gonna' look then that's fine by me."
"I don't recall asking for your opinion on the matter! And furthermore-!"
As Zoro and Eric's conversation dragged on, the remaining Baroque Works agents watched the bickering men with an odd fascination. And as they both stared up at them, something they really should've seen coming crept up behind Mario.
KA-BOOM!
"HAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAA!" The short man cried in pain as he clutched his flaming backside and ran around the clearing.
"Are you having fun now, plumber boy?! Because there's plenty more where that came from!"
Bowser shook a fist as he watched Mario dash around, until a thought struck him which made him turn his head. Sure enough, the three guy was standing right there. He was obviously surprised by Bowser's sudden appearance too, if the way he had pulled his whole body back away from him was anything to go by.
"And don't think that I forgot about YOU!-" Bowser roared as he brought a scaled fist back.
"CANDLE WALL!"
Swish! -Thud! -Thud! -BLAST!
Mr. 3 had sprung into action and created a thick wall of wax between himself and the turtle after he saw him moving his arm. If anyone else had been the one to hit it, they would've suffered far more damage than the wall itself. But after Bowser's fist had collided with it, some thin cracks had grown in the center of the wall, then a second punch had caused them to grow, to which a third punch had destroyed the wall outright.
And worst of all, it didn't seem to have slowed the turtle down very much.
"Now it's your turn, creep! AAAAAAARRRRRrrraaaaaaaaahhh." Then, during the wind up for his next attack, Bowser... just sort of stopped being angry.
He unclenched his fist, unfurrowed his eyebrows, and gently lowered himself down onto the grass, all while letting out a tranquil sigh.
"COLORS TRAP, NOGOMI NO MIDORI." Miss Goldenweek said as she wiped some green paint off of her brush. "I took care of the turtle, Mr. 3. You can uncover your face now."
Mr. 3 shot a wary glance between his fingers, and saw Bowser looking up at him with a big, blissful smile.
"Heeey, buddy o' mine! Great weather we're having today, ain't it?" Bowser said in a euphoric daze.
As soon as his brain confirmed he was no longer in danger, Mr. 3 stepped around the large turtle to directly in front of Miss Goldenweek.
"DON'T PATRONIZE ME! I, AND I ALONE KNOW WHEN IT IS SAFE FOR ME TO LET MY GUARD DOWN!" Mr. 3 screeched at a very unnecessary volume. The wax man then turned his head around towards Mario, who was nearly done patting down the fire burning on his backside. "And this entire encounter with these two has been just that, me letting my guard down right as it appeared others had taken care of these nuisances. Well no more! I shall now take this matter into my own, far more competent hands. Miss Goldenweek, ready your brush!"
Pat. Pat. Pat.
"Whew." As sweet relief washed over him, Mario took a second to wipe his forehead with the back of his hand.
With all of the lava filled castles he'd broken into over the years, he'd learned to take heat that would make others break out in a sweat like it was nothing. But being lit on fire? It was still just as hot the thousandth time it happened as it was the first.
Swish! Sw-Swish! Swi-Swish! -STOMP! STOMP!
"It's over now, meddlesome midget! Gaze upon my brilliance one final time before your untimely demise! Stare at the creation which has taken down many a better foe than yourself! Turn and look at my utterly perfect, CANDLE CHAMPION!"
Mario was looking in Mr. 3's direction alright, he had been ever since he'd heard that stomping.
With the exception of his face, all of Mr. 3's normal body was now sealed away inside of a huge, boxer-like construct made of wax. Its proportions were totally cartoonish, as it had a relatively tiny waist and set of limbs, but also had a massive torso and pelvis, as well as giant, rounded shoes and boxing gloves on. There were also huge metal rings covered in spikes going around the edge of the torso's shoulder region, leading into where the tiny limbs started. And sitting on top of the pelvis was a large, golden-buckled championship belt. And speaking of that golden buckle, the waxy exoskeleton should've been all white, but Miss Goldenweek had carefully colored the entire thing in for Mr. 3. Its gloves and shoes were dull red and white, torso pink and purple, belt a deep green, while every other part of it was some shade of gray.
Truth be told, in spite of its ridiculous appearance, Mr. 3's candle champion was an intimidating sight to behold if only for how large it was. Standing around twenty-five feet tall, his creation made the already short Mario look like an abnormally small infant in comparison. By all logical accounts, Mario should've been shaken by the sight of this thing.
"Oh no!"
Whoosh!
Unfortunately for Mr. 3, traditional scare tactics didn't seem to have any effect on Mario.
The short man just dashed right past him towards his service set, where he saw something which actually concerned him. Zoro, Eric and even the giants were completely covered in wax!
The giants' entire bodies, as well as those of the two human men, had been encased within a thick layer of the pure white substance. All of them were still stuck in the same spots they'd been left at earlier, although now, both Zoro and Eric had angry glares on their faces which looked to be directed at one another. Among the panic which was rapidly saturating Mario's mind was one thought which stopped him from completely losing his cool. If they had just finished being covered in wax, there was a good chance they could still be saved! Mario skidded to a halt at the base of the service set and went to unclench his fist to create a fireball-.
Whoosh! -POW!
"Fear me, damn you!"
When he received a human-sized punch to the right side of his body.
Thud! thud.
Mario's body went limp as it brutally twirled through the air, until he hit the ground face first, only to have the lower half of his body follow suit a second later. His right arm felt absolutely awful after that hit, but he knew he couldn't stay down so long as everybody was trapped in that wax. Forcing himself back up using his left arm, Mario looked behind himself and saw Mr. 3 plodding towards him.
"It would seem that you're still failing to comprehend whom you're standing in the presence of. If you knew what Baroque Works was capable of, you'd already be groveling at my feet like the worm you are. But since you've yet to do so, I suppose I'll have to BEAT THE REVERENCE I'M OWED INTO YOU!" When Mr. 3 finished speaking, the fire on his hair burned with a new intensity as he lifted his candle champion's arms high into the air.
CRASH!
Before he could crush Mario beneath his champion's fists, the short man had curled his body inwards and rolled out of the way.
Mario then stood up and got into a fighting stance, only for a sharp pain to go shooting up his right arm. He hissed and coddled his injured limb, as he broke into a sprint to get away from Mr. 3.
CRASH! -CRASH! -CRASH! -CRASH!
"Stand still and except your fate, midget!"
As he continued running and the sounds of giant fists hitting the earth battered against his ears, he stared over at Zoro and Eric. Both men were rapidly running out of time they didn't have, and Mario was almost out of body parts which he could use to rescue them. He needed help, badly.
...Wait a minute, was that Bowser?
Focusing his eyes on the base of the service set, Mario saw his old adversary sitting down with Miss Goldenweek and drinking a cup of tea with her. He had a big, goofy grin on his face too, as he talked about something which Mario couldn't even pretend to hear from this distance. Miss Goldenweek didn't pay much attention to him though, as she was busy eating yet another onigiri. Mario would've been extremely confused by this sight, had he not seen a green variant of one of Miss Goldenweek's symbols painted on the back of his shell. That meant all he had to do to get Bowser back on his side was destroy that symbol!
That was easy enough by itself, but there were two big problems in the way which he had to find work arounds for first. One of them being throwing a fireball was a non-possibility this time, given that his right arm would go back to being in severe pain the moment he let go of it. The other problem was-
CRRRAAAAASSSH!
That.
Mario stumbled to the side following that attack, as both of the candle champion's fists knocked some large chunks of the ground out of place behind him. Once he caught his balance, Mario noticed that the candle champion's gloves were stuck in the ground. He used this opportunity to look from the freshly ruptured earth, to Mr. 3's snarling face, to back at Bowser's serene smile.
And then, an admittedly simple idea was born.
"Hey, stinky!"
Right as Mr. 3 finished pulling his champion's hands out of the earth, he heard that midget's annoyingly high-pitched voice call out in a teasing tone. He turned towards it, and was greeted by Mario dancing in a way which he'd be generous to describe as infantile. He was basically just rhythmically shaking his backside at him, while loudly humming to himself.
Well, if the goal of this demeaning display was to get a rise out of him-
CRASH!
"I'LL KILL YOU!"
then it had worked, all too well.
Mario made himself run faster and faster as Mr. 3's fists flew towards him at bone-crushing speeds. He briefly reconsidered his idea for the sake of Bowser's health, but he didn't think he had much of a choice in the matter now. With Mr. 3 hot on his trail, Mario ran up to Bowser's shell, stood still in front of it for a second, and then dived out of the way.
POW! -Thud.
Bowser was sent packing after getting punched by Mr. 3's wax robot. His head was left spinning for a bit until he shook it clear.
"Grrr, if that three guy didn't think he was in for a beating already, then he REEEAAALLY doesn't want to know what he's in for now!... Wait, why haven't I punched his lights out already?"
"Aww, we were having such a nice time over here too."
Bowser turned around and saw Miss Goldenweek climbing back onto her feet while watching Mr. 3 chase after Mario. She'd apparently forgotten all about Bowser the instant he'd been punched from her sight.
"Looks like Mr. 3 still can't get that short guy. I'll just take care of him myself so we can be done here. Missions get so boring when they go on for too long." Miss Goldenweek said to herself as she pulled out her art supplies again.
Bowser's eyes went wide. That's why he hadn't kicked his butt yet!
As Miss Goldenweek readied her paints, she heard some very distinct stomping nearby a little too late to react to it.
"Oh no you don't! Gimme that!" Bowser said as he ripped the brush and palette from Miss Goldenweek's hands.
"Wha- Hey!"
As soon as he'd taken her painting tools, Bowser chucked both items high into the air above himself. He then took a deep breath and shot a fireball directly at them, which completely incinerated both pieces of equipment.
"There, art class is officially cancelled! And as for YOU, I-" When Bowser looked back at Miss Goldenweek, he was greeted not by a mind controlling witch like the one he'd been ready to scream at. Instead, he saw a small, defenseless girl who was on the verge of crying as she watched a large monster get ready to attack her.
Well, he couldn't say this was what he wanted to happen.
"I... I uh, think you've learned your lesson from this. Don't try to mind control me with paint. Yeah."
Crash!
"You can't dodge me forever, you pesky runt!"
Hearing the ruckus, Bowser looked past the girl and saw Mario barely managing to stay away from Mr. 3's candle champion. Actually no, what he really saw was an easy way to get out of this awkward conversation!
"Look kid, you should be playing with rocks or something instead of hanging out with jerks like these. Go be a normal kid for a change, and in the future, leave the planning and execution of evil schemes up to guys like me." Bowser said with a comforting, almost parental tone in his voice before he broke into a sprint towards Mr. 3.
As Miss Goldenweek watched him dash away, she was left with a deep feeling of bewilderment as she mulled over the turtle's words. But she still had enough sense in her to understand that now would probably be the best time for her to make her exit.
CRASH! -Thud!
With scarcely an ounce of energy left in his body, Mario was sent careening to the dirt after that last attack had rocked the ground he'd been running on. Once he touched, or rather, crashed down, his lungs burned with a need for air as the candle champion's imposing shadow loomed over him. It looked like this was it.
"Heh, heh, This, heh is where, heh, YOU DIE!" Mr. 3 said as he raised his fists over his head.
KA-BOOM! Thu-Thud!
"AAACK! MY ARMS!" Mr. 3 screamed as he stared at the melted tips of his upper limbs in shock.
"Wow, you act like you're so smart, but you don't even know that fire melts wax? Sounds like you're pretty dumb to me."
Mr. 3 whipped his champion's body around, only to see Bowser standing at most a few feet away from him. If the large turtle had given him the chance to do so, Mr. 3 would've very quickly backed away from him. Instead, Bowser wasted no time in hitting the center of Mr. 3's only exposed body part as hard as he could.
POW!
"AAAACCK! M-MY NOOOSE!"
As a direct result of his attack, Bowser's yellow knuckles became stained with that weird red liquid, while even more of it gushed out of Mr. 3's nostrils. The Baroque Works agent turned his back on Bowser to try and tend to his now crooked nose, while the turtle stared at the red goo.
"H-Hey... Hey..."
Bowser stopped looking at it though when he heard a bleary sounding Mario calling up to him from the ground. When Bowser saw at him, he couldn't help but let a mocking smile grow on his face.
"Aww, what's wrong Mario? Can't accept the fact that a walking candle's packing more heat than you? Gwahaha!"
Mario ignored Bowser's insult and used his left arm to point at Zoro and Eric. As he pointed, he talked to Bowser in his incoherent language.
"They can't breathe in there? Hmph. Well I guess I could get them out of that wax by melting it, even though they wrongfully attacked me earlier, but what's in it for me?"
Mario loudly grumbled at Bowser while frantically pointing at his wrist.
"Alright, sheesh! Fine, Mr. Goody Two-Shoes, I'll go do your job for you- but I'm breaking Brogy out first!" Bowser said as he walked over to all of the trapped men.
"Hey, I don't know if any of you can hear me in there, but consider this your warning for the incoming heatwave!"
As this was happening, Mr. 3 had made himself a new pair of regular-sized hands which he was using to try and treat his nose. He was already on the verge of giving up on the poor abused organ, when the only other thing which could've possibly made his day worse happened.
KA-BOOOOOOM!
Mr. 3 turned around and saw all of his wax being ravaged by flames.
"NOOOOO! MY BEAUTIFUL SERVICE SET! HOW COULD THIS BE?!" Mr. 3's relatively tiny face cried out from the center of his champion's torso.
"ONI-"
"KAMA KAMA NO-"
Even now the officer agent couldn't catch a break, as a pair of voices which he wished he didn't recognize called out from the wall of fire. He would've done something, ANYTHING to protect himself if he had been given a chance to-.
"GIRI!"
"TSUMUJIKAZE!"
SLASH! -SLASH!
But he had not.
Blood started to pour from the fresh wounds on Mr. 3's chest, as two burning, partially wax covered figures stood at either side of his heavily damaged candle champion's body. At the sight of them, Mr. 3 opened his mouth to speak, only to discover that he did not currently possess the energy required to form words. Instead, he quietly gasped for air as his body collapsed to the ground.
Thud.
CRASH!
Back in the direction where the figures had come from, one of the giants slowly rose from their wax cocoon while Bowser stared up at them expectantly. Yet neither of the figures turned around.
"Is this actually happening? Am I still alive?" Eric asked while staring at his freed hands.
"Yup. Feels good, doesn't it?" Zoro said with a roguish grin as he sheathed his three katana, before turning around to walk towards the others.
Eric didn't budge, his eyes still locked on his sore hands. He flexed all of his fingers at the same time, causing his immaculate nails to sparkle in the midday sun. As he observed how perfectly the light bounced off of them, a three-word sentence echoed through his mind.
He had survived.
...
"WAAAAAH! WAH, WAAAAAAH!"
SPLAAA-AAASH!
Dorry was knelt down beside the body of his fellow giant and wailing with all his might to the heavens above. Brogy had yet to show any signs of life after Bowser had melted the wax off of him, which proved to be more than Dorry could take.
"OH GOD, WHY MUST OUR GLORIOUS DUEL END THIS WAY?! WAAAAH!"
The blue caped giant's tears came out as powerful streams which shot up over his head, creating a picturesque rainbow in the sky. It was a beautiful sight, but it was a hard one to enjoy for the four men gathered around the giants.
"He cries with the force of an erupting geyser." Zoro said as he stared at Dorry with a glint of astonishment in his gaze.
"Sniff, I TRIED TO WARN YOU, BROGY! WAAAAAH! WHY WOULDN'T YOU LISTEN TO MEEEE?! WAAAAAAAH!" Bowser said as streams of tears which matched Dorry's flowed from his own eyes.
Eric kept his thoughts on Brogy's condition to himself, in favor of covering his ears and scowling at Bowser. Wasn't he being just a touch melodramatic about this?
As for the fourth man in the clearing, Mario had pushed himself back up into a sitting position at some point and had been staring at Brogy ever since. Even as the others came over and stood by him, and Bowser began to cry alongside Dorry, he refused to look away from the teal caped giant. He needed to know that Brogy was okay.
Thud. Thud.
And a few moments later, his patience was rewarded.
"Brogy!" Mario said with a big smile on his face.
Everyone else in the clearing couldn't believe what they were seeing, even as Brogy sat up and started panting heavily.
"You- You're alive!? But how?!" Dorry said as his eyes bugged out through the holes in his helmet.
Nobody spoke for a second, until a revelation hit Eric.
"The wax from Mr. 3's sculpture! When it fell on Brogy, it must have stopped his bleeding for long enough that his body could clot over his wounds! He was saved by the very thing which nearly killed him!"
"Bleeding? Wazzat?"
"JUST HOW IGNORANT ARE YOU?!" Eric screeched at Bowser with enough force that several veins on his forehead bulged out.
Dorry didn't hear a thing that was said after Eric explained Brogy's miraculous recovery though, and he had barely managed to hear that. All that really mattered to him, was that Brogy was okay.
Crunch!
"WHAT A BLESSED DAY, PRAISE BE TO THE GOD OF ELBAF! GEGYAGYAGYAGYAGYA!" Dorry said as he hugged Brogy with all his strength.
"Careful there Dorry, my wounds are still fresh. You should know since you're the one who gave them to me after all. Gebababababa..." Brogy laughed through a faint smile while Dorry jokingly punched his shoulder.
While his injuries may have prevented him from fully unwinding, Mario could still relax a little bit now. It had been a hard-won fight, but he and Bowser had done it. Everyone was alright.
Pow. Pow.
Pow! Pow!
POW! POW!
"Oi, are you trying to start something?!"
"Yeah I am! And this time we fight, I'll be the one to knock you down!"
Or so he thought.
As he and the others watched, for no discernible reason, Dorry and Brogy started trading punches. Their attacks were light at first, but they quickly grew in power, which led to both men standing up and getting in each other's faces. For crying out loud, hadn't they fought enough for one day?!
"Oi! We still need help finding a way back to the others!"
Both the giants looked down at their feet, and saw Zoro cupping his hands around his mouth so he could yell up to them. Mario was thankful Zoro did that, because it took their attention off of beating each other up for a moment. Although, weirdly enough, Brogy looked even more upset now.
"Help you? Gebababababababa! Don't think that I forgot what you and that turtle did, human! Why should we bother helping you?"
Dorry looked at his fellow giant.
"Are they the reason you were hurt when you came to fight earlier?"
"You noticed I was injured?"
"Of course I did, I knew you were hurt from the very beginning! After battling you for a century, it's only natural I'd notice even the slightest of changes with you in a fight."
Before Brogy could respond, Bowser stepped forward while using his shoulder to shove Zoro out of the way.
"Now hold on a minute, Brogy! I already told you, that explosion was not my fault! It was one of Mr. 3's goons who added a bomb to the drink I gave you!"
"...Does that mean he was tricked into drinking a booger?" Eric said with a repulsed expression on his face.
"But you should've already known that, because I tried to tell you this as soon as it happened! The only reason you didn't, is because you were too busy calling me a liar while I was trying to give you a gift so you wouldn't chop me in half!" Bowser stuck his thumb out and pointed it over his shoulder towards the unconscious body of Mr. 3. "AND, let's not forget that I just saved both of your massive hides from that candle creep's wax! So, I'd say that we're not only all squared up now, but it is in fact YOU who owes ME a favor, thank you very much." Bowser ended his rant by crossing his arms, closing his eyes and smugly smiling to himself.
BONK!
Bowser crouched down and grasped at the throbbing goose egg atop his head, while Zoro walked past him to where he'd been standing.
"Look, we're sorry that we insulted your duel, but me and Mario really need to get back to the Red Line."
"Hmm? What about your other nakama?" Brogy said as he gestured at Bowser and Eric.
Zoro opened his mouth to reply, but he cut himself off when Mario stood up and limped over to Eric's side. Mario then pulled out his chalkboard and drew on it for a couple of seconds, before flipping it around to show the giants a sketch of him and Zoro dressed like waiters, welcoming Eric on board the Going Merry.
Zoro flicked his eyes towards the narrow split between Eric's eyelids for the briefest of moments, and received an impish grin in return.
"That's right, these two are ever so kindly allowing me to sail with them until we reach the next island." Eric said as he patted Mario's hat a couple of times, which earned him a smile from the short man.
"WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON HERE, MARIO!?"
"A guest huh? Well hopefully you know how to act like a respectful one, unlike that turtle back there."
Even though Bowser was still doubled over in pain, he made sure to let out a loud groan at that comment.
As Bowser's groan tailed off, Zoro's blood may very well have actually been boiling. If the giants weren't here right now, he would've made the state he'd left that threehead in look like NOTHING compared to what he wanted to do to these two irritating bastards!
If only Mario hadn't of vouched for that hook haired creep!
If only he hadn't of helped that shitty turtle!
...But Mario had stood up for the hook hair, and he had saved the turtle. So, unless he wanted to risk both of those giants getting mad at him and Mario again, he had to play along with this stupid lie for the time being.
Shit.
"Yeah, I meant all of us need to get back to the Red Line. Are you both sure there's nothing we can do to go back there?"
The giants looked above themselves deep in thought, while a dry laugh filled the air.
"Hahaha. Surely there's no way you actually don't know how this place works."
Zoro turned around and gave Eric a nasty stink eye.
"Eh, you got something you wanna' say?"
"Nothing that even the most uneducated of sailors would already know. The only way to travel between islands on the Grand Line is to use a log pose. You must use a log pose to sail to an island, wait on that island while the log pose adjusts to the next island's magnetic field, then sail to that one. Said cycle repeats until you reach the last island on the Grand Line, Laugh Tale."
Laugh Tale? What a strange name for an island. Mario imagined it must've been called that because it was a place filled with comedians who delighted in sharing amusing anecdotes with others.
"What's your point, push-nails?"
"If you had paid attention to what I just said, you would've noticed that at no point while using a Log Pose do you sail backwards to an island you've already stopped at. You just keep moving ahead. If the straw hat is behind us, he'll have to come to this island before we can be reunited. And seeing as his ship is already here, I don't think we'll be meeting him again for quite some time."
Just then, Mario remembered something very important that Mr. 3 had said. He blurted a question out at Zoro and Eric, only to be given blank expressions in return.
"...You know, Ussop gave you that chalkboard for a reason." Zoro said in the flattest of tones.
Whoosh!
"PRINCESS?! You mean to tell me that Peach is with some loser wearing a straw hat!? I haven't even made our wedding official yet, and she's going out with a YOKEL?! I gotta' go after her, toot sweet!" Bowser said as he violently shook Mario back and forth.
"YOU UNDERSTOOD HIM?!" Zoro and Eric shouted with their jaws hanging as low as they could go.
Bowser dropped Mario, who was currently experiencing a dizzying sense of déjà vu, and ran over to Zoro and Eric.
"C'mon guys, let's put our heads together here! If those Baroque clowns sailed to this island, then- then they must've used one of those pose thingies you keep talking about! Maybe they left it somewhere else so they could use it to leave here later! We just need to figure out where it could be! So?! -HURRY UP, I NEED TO KNOW WHERE IT IS!"
Caught completely off guard by Bowser's sudden mood swing, Eric opened his mouth.
"Well, if they did have one, it would most likely still be at the location where they planned their attack on the giants. Perhaps a hidden base of operations."
Zoro's eyes lit up at that.
"I know where it is."
...
Deep in the heart of the jungle, a pair of tall bushes began to shake. A second later, a green and tan reptilian face popped out from between them.
"Ha, found it!" Bowser said as he charged out of the foliage.
Zoro, Eric and Mario followed after him, as he dashed up to and then threw open the door of a small, cube shaped house. The whole building was the same bright shade of white as Mr. 3's wax, and it had two circular windows on one of its sides. As Mario took in the sight of the house, which stuck out like a sore thumb in the surrounding environment, he saw Eric slink up beside Zoro.
"Hmm, so much for knowing where their hideout was. But I suppose we should consider ourselves lucky, seeing as that overgrown turtle managed to so effortlessly find this place for you."
Zoro's face became tinted red and he angrily muttered something under his breath, as he stomped ahead towards the building's entrance. At the sight of this, Mario shook his head to himself with a knowing smile. Just a little while longer, and he was sure that those two would start to come around to each other's company.
Stomp! Stomp! Stomp!
"Come on, come on! Where is that stupid thing?!"
Uugh, now his royal rudeness on the other hand-.
Once Mario had made his way through the door, he could see Bowser desperately searching every nook and cranny of the building for the log pose. It was somewhat surprising he hadn't found it yet, given the interior design of this place.
While there technically was furniture in the hideout, it too was made of wax, which meant that it was little more than an extension of the building itself.
From the benches which ran along the base of every wall, aside from the one the door was on, to the wide, circular, table-like structure and matching chairs in the center of the room, the house and furniture were one and the same. The only non-wax items in here that Mario could see, was a bronze sconce hanging down from the ceiling which held a burning candle, a young sapling that was popping up through a hole in the floor over by the windows, and a yellow tablecloth with thin orange stripes that was resting atop the aforementioned table. The tablecloth also had some tattered papers and a pink, blue and white tea set laid out on top of it, but that was it as far as non-wax items were concerned.
Zoro walked past Bowser, who was trying his best to tear one of the benches off the wall, until he was standing over the table.
"Ha, looks like those giants did pretty well for themselves back in the day."
Evidently that had caught Eric's attention, as the purple haired man suddenly broke into a power-walk to snatch those old papers up for himself. Mario kept up behind Eric, curious as to what was so interesting about them.
Looking past Eric's long thumbnails, Mario could see a pair of images printed beside each other which depicted a much younger Dorry and Brogy, beneath the word wanted in large uppercase lettering. From top to bottom, the poster read:
WANTED, DEAD OR ALIVE, DORRY & BROGY, ß200,000,000, MARINE.
There was also a large block of text in the bottom left corner of the poster which Mario couldn't quite make out from the ground. Not that he needed to though, since he'd already come to the slightly disheartening realization that both of the giants were wanted men.
First Luffy, and now them?
Bad or not, Mario couldn't help but wonder how many people in this world were considered dangerous criminals. And that thought led him to wondering what percentage of those people had been wrongfully labeled dangerous, versus those who actually deserved that title. Then, out of those truly dangerous ones, were there others who were just as strong as the people from Baroque Works? Or others even stronger than them? And, as much as he really didn't want to consider the possibility, had Luigi or Peach fallen right into the laps of bad people like them?
Mario shuddered at the thought. But he managed to stop himself from getting sick with worry by pondering on the one other major question that the poster brought up.
Did that B symbol next to the reward mean that this world's version of money was called bucks?
"Dorry the Blue Ogre and Brogy the Red Ogre. The dual captains of The Warrior Giant Pirates. Hmph, if nothing else, the presence of these posters proves that Mr. 3 wasn't as solely focused on the creation of his macabre art as he made it seem."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
Eric turned the posters around so Zoro could see them.
"Isn't it obvious? He wasn't just killing those giants because they were in his way, he had also intended on claiming their 200,000,000 beri bounty for himself."
Berry? The currency of this world was named after a fruit? What was this, the Donkey Kong Islands?
"Would you two quit yapping about those Baroque guys already!? I beat them up like forever ago! I need to get that log pose already so I can go find Peach!"
"Geez, if you want a peach so bad why don't you just go out and grab one from the jungle?"
"THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT BY THAT!" Bowser roared at Zoro.
Prrrrr... Prrrrr...
Everyone stopped talking when a weird, muffled, almost cat-like purring sound started to fill the small building. Bowser quickly walked over to where the noise seemed to be coming from and found a closed wicker basket sitting behind a chair.
"Ha, jackpot!" Bowser said as he nearly tore the basket's lid off and shoved his hand underneath the blanket covering its contents. "Come to me, my little Log Pose! Papa Bowser is ready to set sail!"
"I don't think that noise is a-"
Zoro didn't bother finishing his sentence, because as soon as Bowser got a grip on something, he yanked his hand out of the basket excited to see that he had finally found a... snail?
"Purururururu!" The big white snail continued to loudly purr through a set of bright red lips sitting beneath a thin black mustache on its face. As it did this, its tired eyes stared blankly ahead from the tops of a pair of thin eyestalks. On its back was a large white shell covered in vertical green stripes, which was topped off with an indented area holding what looked to be an old fashion, square, corded receiver. And, to go with that odd addition to its anatomy, was a green rotary dial on the right side of its shell that had Mr. 3's code name printed above it.
"What the heck is this thing?" Bowser said as he eyed the purring cyborg gastropod with a raised eyebrow.
When it dawned on Eric just how little Bowser understood what the creature he was holding was capable of, he took a cautious step towards him with his hands outstretched.
"Be careful with that Den Den Mushi! Look, notice how that particular one has Mr. 3 inscribed on it? That means the person attempting to get in contact with him must be another high ranking operative from Baroque Works. It could possibly even be their ringleader, one of the seven Schchibukai, Mr. 0. Understand this, recklessly accepting that call would not only expose all of us to their entire organization, but once they realize that we're responsible for the defeat of some of their highest ranking operatives, they will undoubtedly send even more powerful reinforcements to this island to eliminate us! Are you grasping how severe what I'm saying is?"
"Den Den who-now?" Bowser said as he lazily scratched the side of his head.
"Purururururu!"
So, if Mario had heard that correctly, this snail was basically this world's version of a phone? Well then, he saw no reason why no one should answer that call! It might be important! And even if it wasn't, it'd be rude to just not pick it up.
As Mario made his way past Zoro and Eric, both of the taller men realized what he was about to do too late to stop him.
Click.
"Hello!" Mario happily said into the receiver.
He then waited a couple of seconds for a response, but none came.
"Hello?"
"...Who is this?" The dark, slightly raspy voice's question came out through the Den Den Mushi's mouth.
Bowser winced at the sight of the snail talking, but couldn't bring himself to look away from it. He had to know what in the world someone calling someone else on a snail-phone could want. At the same time, Zoro furrowed his eyebrows while Eric began to quietly choke on the air he was breathing.
"Mario! Super Mario!"
"You're a member of the Straw Hat pirates, aren't you?"
"Mm-hmm."
The sound of a chair scrapping along a polished floor filled the background of the call.
"First all those things start coming out of the desert, and now this? What a disgrace."
That same wood-on-stone grating noise could be heard again, and then the voice came back into focus.
"Well Mario, I don't know how you got past Mr. 3, but all you need to know about me is that I'm a man who comes up with and sticks to his plans. My goals will be reached, regardless of any unforeseen problems that crop up in their wake, unintentional or otherwise. And your crew has very deliberately caused a lot of problems for me recently. Defeating my operatives, sheltering the princess from me."
In the blink of an eye, Bowser ripped the receiver out of Mario's hand.
"HEY BOZO, LISTEN UP! THE ONLY PERSON AROUND HERE THAT'S ALLOWED TO TAKE PEACH AWAY FROM MARIO IS ME, BOWSER! KING OF THE KOOPAS, AND BOSS OF ERIC, ZORO AND THE STRAW HAT GUY EVERYONE KEEPS TALKING ABOUT!"
"SHUT THE HELL UP, YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER MORON!" Eric screamed at Bowser, before clamping his hands down over his mouth.
There was a moment of silence before the voice returned.
"It doesn't matter how many of you there are, because I have a foolproof way of dealing with pests such as yourselves."
Ka-click.
Everyone in the room turned towards that sound, and were greeted by the sight of two animals standing in the building's windows. The first of which was a small otter wearing black rounded sunglasses and a light pink bodysuit covered in purple polka dots, who was holding two seashells with large spikes around their edges. The second was a black vulture wearing tan goggles and a yellow aviator hat peppered with dark orange flowers, which appeared to have a twin-barreled turret strapped onto its back.
Also, the turret was trained on Mario and Bowser's current position.
"I get rid of them."
P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-POW!
Gunshots rang out through the air as everyone in the building ducked for cover from the vulture's sudden attack. At the same time, the otter jumped from its window and tried to lash out at Zoro's face. However, Zoro saw the creature coming and made short work of it.
Slash!
With a single stroke of the rebated edge of his sword, zoro knocked the otter out cold.
Ka-click.
P-P-P-P-P-P-P-P-POW!
"SOMEBODY GET THIS CRAZY BIRD OFF ME!" Bowser cried from his hiding spot laying on the ground behind the table, which the vulture had already destroyed over half of.
Frustrated, Zoro glanced across the room at Mario, and saw him sitting with his back pressed tightly against the backside of one of the chairs. It didn't look like he had a plan, which wasn't great since Zoro knew he didn't have one either. The swordsman cursed under his breath as shards of glass from the tea set flew overhead, before tensing his muscles so he could make a beeline for the creature.
"Stay down." A hushed voice said.
Zoro looked at Eric, who had taken cover behind the same chair that he did, which made him realize how intensely focused he was. Even though Zoro couldn't actually see Eric's eyes, it was clear to him that he had locked them onto that vulture. The swordsman didn't really trust him, but if Eric was willing to throw himself at that flying turret first, then he wasn't about to stand in his way.
P-P-P-P-P-P-P-!
"KAMA KAMA NO..."
Eric held his middle finger and thumb in the shape of a circle as he waited for his opening.
P-P-P-P-POW! Ka-cli-
"FURI-KU!"
Pew!
BOOM!
The instant the Vulture's gun went to reload, Eric popped around the edge of the chair and flicked his finger at the weapon. This sent a tiny, lightning fast strip of razor sharp air straight down the left barrel of the turret, and caused it to explode as soon as the bird went to fire it again. The soot covered creature sat still for a second following that, as many of its black feathers floated aimlessly down to the ground. Shortly afterwards its body went completely limp, as the bird fell backwards through the window on which it had been perched.
Thud.
A powerful silence then carpeted the wax building, as if no one had set foot in it all day.
Once everyone was sure the coast was clear, they all slowly stood up and collected themselves. It should've been a faster process then it actually was, but it was hard for anyone to feel truly safe after a sneak attack like that. As Mario finished dusting off the chunks of wax on his overalls, he walked back over to the Den Den Mushi sitting on the remaining portion of the table. The little snail had shockingly made it through the whole fight unscathed, which meant he could see if that mysterious person was still on the line. Very unsurprisingly, they were not.
"Okay, there is no way anyone can tell me those were normal animals. I REFUSE to take another step out there if other beavers and buzzards are gonna' try and attack me like that." Bowser said as he peaked out the window at the injured bird's body.
"They weren't normal animals. They're probably working directly under Mr. 0. He must've sent them here beforehand to check on how Mr. 3's mission was- WAIT A MINUTE, YOU JUST TOLD HIM ALL OF OUR NAMES!" Eric shrieked.
"Huh? I did?" Bowser said with a raised eyebrow.
"OF COURSE YOU DID, HOW CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER?! YOU TALKED TO HIM BARELY A MINUTE AGO!" In-between that sentence and the next, Eric lost all of his energy and took on a large frown. "He knows what our voices sound like now. There's no way all of us haven't been added to his personal hit list after that exchange."
"I ain't scared of him! If that loser wants to hit me, then he can come do it to my face!"
Eric just pinched the bridge of his nose at Bowser's meaningless threat.
"Sheltering a princess... What is Luffy doing out there?" Zoro said to himself while staring up at the building's roof.
Oh right, Luffy was with the princess! Mario turned to talk to Zoro, but a fine beam of light hitting his eye derailed his train of thought. He looked at where the light was coming from through squinted eyes, and saw it was a reflecting off a small brown object that had rolled away from the otter's body. He walked over to the object and picked it up, which caused a big smile to grow on his face.
"Hey, I got it!"
Everyone turned towards Mario to see he was proudly holding up a wooden, hourglass shaped trinket which housed a sphere that contained a needle on a pole, whose red end was pointing off into the distance. The only clue as to where it was aiming towards was a single word etched into the wood protecting the top half of the sphere.
Arabasta.
Hey all, TTI here.
So, pretty lengthy chapter this time around, huh? I originally wanted to cover more ground in this one, but this is already the longest chapter I've ever written and it's been a while since I posted, so I figured I should just get it out to you guys already.
Much more importantly though is that since the last time I posted, From Plumber to Pirate surpassed 10,000 views on FanFiction! Woohoo! To celebrate this big milestone, I created an Archive of Our Own account and will now be posting all future updates to the story on both websites simultaneously! So if you're reading this message on AO3, welcome, and I hope you enjoy the ride!
Also, regardless of which site you're on, you can now check my profile page to find a link to my other account.
As a final bonus, besides the usual slew of fixes I applied to the earlier chapters, I finally remade the story's title card in higher quality after all these years. It's got 100% more shading and background art now!
That's all for now, I'll see you back here real soon!
Stay tuned and all that. =]