Disclaimer: I don't own HP or any of these characters. That belongs to JKR, Scholastic Books, Warner Brothers, etc.
Chapter Thirty : Serious Chance
The next day, Hermione lingered outside Professor Lupin's office, wondering how best to approach her fellow professor. Suddenly, she was startled by the sound of the door opening. Lupin was standing by the door, looking straight at her. "Is there something you want to discuss, Hermione?" he asked. Hermione nodded. "Then perhaps it would be best if you come in. Nothing will get done with you just worrying, Hermione."
Hermione winced. She should have remembered that werewolves were known for their keen senses, and so that it would be difficult to hide from him. "Yes, professor," she said as she stepped inside his office.
Remus chuckled as he closed the door. "Just Remus is fine, Hermione," he said. "You're not a student any more. We professors tend to refer to each other by our given names – not unless, of course, one happens to extremely dislike another, of course." He smiled ruefully. "We are remarkably like our students when it comes to that."
"Yes, grudges can be hard to get over," agreed Hermione, thinking of how Harry and Ron still loathed Malfoy. It wasn't as though Malfoy couldn't be a prat – he quite often was a large one – but he wasn't as bad as her friends made him out to be. "And it's strange, very strange, that suddenly I am supposed to refer to all my professors by their first names. For some reason, it still seems a bit rude." She shrugged her shoulders.
Remus burst out laughing at those words. "To be completely honest," he said, trying to catch his breath from laughing, "it took me the better part of the year to get used to that when I first started to teach here. In fact, I had only just got used to it when . . . well, you know. Ironically enough, the only professor that it was easy for me to call by name was Snape, and I imagine that was because I always had. But I ought to remember my manners." Remus pulled out a chair for Hermione, which she gracefully took. "Would you like anything to drink? A cup of tea? And are you hungry?"
"No thank you," she replied. "I am fine."
"Except for whatever is on your mind, I would think." Professor Lupin took the seat across from her and leaned towards her. "Go on, Hermione. It's easier if you just say it, rather than hold it back. I rather suspect I know why you're here."
Hermione sighed. Of course, it's easy for him to say that – he's not the one to admit that he needs a bit of help with his classes. But I suppose since he has said that, there is no real point in beating around the bush. "I have a small favor to ask you," she said. He nodded encouragingly for her to go on. "Well, it's not really a small favor if I think about it . . . but I wouldn't ask for it, if I didn't think I needed the help. And I know – I ought to stop babbling."
"I wouldn't have put it that way," said her companion with a smile. "But yes, I was thinking along those lines."
"Right." Hermione nodded. She gathered her courage and blurted out, "Do you think that you might take on a few of my detentions for me? That is to say, any detentions that I assign to the boys in my classes. Because I must confess, I assigned quite a bit of them lately – and they all seemed to be looking forward to it, and that's not really the point of what's supposed to be a punishment."
Remus raised his eyebrows at her before speaking. "Why not ask Filch to help you out?" he asked. "He's usually more than happy to be the one to give students their detentions."
"I have been asking him," Hermione explained. "He seemed most put out about the whole matter. He always agrees, but he complains the whole time."
"I think that it is in Filch's nature to complain about everything," said Remus. "I shouldn't speak so, as he has had a hard lot to deal with. But yes, I would be happy to help you out there. And though there are times when I cannot help, I am sure that you can ask Hagrid, if you don't want to approach Filch." He winked at her. "Considering what I've heard about the devotion you've managed to inspire in some of your students, it's probably best that I step in and help before they have to face your boyfriend's wrath."
Hermione groaned and covered her face. "Do all the professors know?" she asked.
"Of course. No man is an island, and we all keep tabs on what is going on in each other's lives." Remus grinned. "Especially when it's as amusing as this. Unfortunately –or fortunately from your perspective – none of us have Invisibility Cloaks, so we have to rely upon ghosts to hear what happened in your class."
Hermione sighed. "Why me?" she asked.
"You must admit that you're much younger than everyone else here and so you seem more accessible. And as I'm sure Harry would be happy to attest to, you're very pretty and so it's natural that they gravitate towards you."
"What I don't understand is why this happened after I started dating," Hermione said. "I mean, all of my students were here when I was here – it was just last year – and so why didn't anything happen then? Not that I wanted anything to happen then . . . but this seemed really to come out of nowhere."
Remus considered those words, rubbing his chin with one hand. "I think it's because you were always accompanied by your friends – or so it seemed. Harry and Ron make for a quite a frightening duo when it comes to scaring potential suitors away. Or rather, I think they would," he said hastily, as he saw the question arise in Hermione's eyes. "I never actually heard of them doing anything to anyone who wanted to date you, though I know that Ron wanted to pummel Viktor Krum into the ground at times."
Hermione snorted. "That's Ron's answer to everything. If you don't like a person or what they're doing, introduce them to your fists. Because goodness knows that he had no luck with spells."
"Simple, but quite satisfying, I imagine," said Remus, with almost an admiring tone to his voice. "No, I would not do that . . . but it reminds me of a friend who would." He looked solemn, and Hermione guessed that he was remembering Sirius. "As I was saying, I don't think either Harry or Ron did anything in particular to scare away men from you. I think they were scared away just by thinking of what might happen to them. And you had a bit of reputation, that you'd hex anyone who would interrupt your studies to ask you out."
"I would not!" Hermione said hotly. Then she stopped to think. "Okay, maybe I threatened that once, but that was because Terry Boot was being incredibly annoying. As a Ravenclaw, he should have known better than to bother me before finals." She huffed and crossed her arms. "I still think it was a ploy to get me to stop studying so that one of them might get better marks than me that year. Stupid plan, that. Would have been better just to study more."
Remus chuckled once again. "And you sometimes remind me of someone else. It's funny how life works out some time."
"Isn't it?" said Hermione. Like that charm. No matter what McGonagall says, it did bring us together . . . and it brought me to Harry that other day when he needed me. She sighed. But he wouldn't have been like that if that damn charm hadn't sent me to Malfoy the day before! I hope I can find a counterspell soon.
"Quite frankly, Hermione," said Remus, interrupting her chain of thoughts, "I thought your favor would be quite different from the one you asked."
"You did?" Hermione blinked in surprised. "What did you expect?" she asked. "Given that you already knew of the troubles I had been having with the wizards in my classes."
"Yes, I knew about that, like everyone else. But I thought you were handling them fine and that Filch would be kept happy dealing with detentions for the next several months." He leaned forward in his chair, tilting his entire body towards Hermione. "I hope you don't get upset about this, but Minerva mentioned to me, the other day, about the spell you're under."
"Oh. I see." Hermione waited for the inevitable lecture.
"It was a bloody stupid thing for you to do," said Remus. "Using a charm – and a very advanced one as well – that you had modified without going to someone else, to ask what they thought of your modifications."
"Who could I have gone to?" asked Hermione. "I was a student when I first made that charm. Students aren't allowed to do such things, so I kept it a secret because I didn't want to get expelled."
"That's the downside of forbidding spells to students," Remus remarked. "On one hand, you don't want any of them attempting such difficult spells, but on the other hand, if one of them does try to fashion a spell or charm like that, you would want them to come to you to make sure they did it right." He shook his head. "Something tells me, Hermione, that if you had went to Dumbledore with the charm, he would have told you what he thought of your modifications before confiscating it. And I doubt he would have expelled you. Merlin knows that we did far worse things during our time as students, and we never had to face expulsion."
Hermione grimaced. "It's not that I didn't respect Professor Dumbledore and still do, now that he's gone," she said, "but he was far too fond of giving hints in riddles."
"I quite agree, Hermione. I quite agree. It is one thing to phrase something differently to make a person think. It's a completely different matter entirely to be so vague about something important, such that the person who you are trying to warn is not warned at all."
"I know," said Hermione. "And I know that sometimes a direct warning – like not to go into the woods – can encourage a person to do exactly that."
"That's human nature for you. And I shan't say anything else on how stupid it was for you to use that charm. You are probably already beating yourself up for that. What I was going to say is that I took the time to mention it to Severus. I hope you don't think that was too forward of me. I just thought it might be a good idea to see if he had any ideas, for perhaps a potion would be the appropriate cure instead of a charm."
"Oh." Hermione slumped down in her seat. She didn't want to think what Snape had to say when he heard about that. He probably made a few cutting remarks about how her use of the charm proved that she was not suited to be a professor here at Hogwarts and how she would only be a bad example for the students, especially as she was currently dating Potter. And it might have taken him more than just a few remarks to say all of that. And he would probably have more to add than just that, she thought to herself.
"You need not react like that. Severus has spent most of his life trying to atone for the bad choices he made when he was younger," said Remus. "That is more than I can say for other people."
"I know, I know," said Hermione. "I'm just surprised he didn't suggest I be taken off the staff for such stupidity though."
"Actually, he did mutter something along those lines under his breath." Hermione groaned at those words. "But I took the liberty of telling him because he has one of the finest minds when it comes not only to the making of potions, but the creation of counters as well." Remus grinned wryly. "Maybe there is something to what he says about studying the Dark Arts in order to learn how to defeat them. But teaching them, I do believe is a dangerous path that we should not take. As McGonagall – and Dumbledore before her – agree with that philosophy, I believe I am quite safe in my job."
"The fact that you're one of the few D.A.D.A. teachers we had that actually knew anything also helps, I would think," said Hermione.
"Thank you."
"Don't mention it. It's not much of a compliment, when you consider that I'm comparing you to the likes of Lockhart."
"Better to be compared to a stupid coward like Lockhart than righteous idiot like Umbridge," Remus reflected out loud. "But enough. I keep getting off track. And you haven't been helping me when it comes to staying on point, young lady." He pretended to glare at Hermione.
"Sorry," she said with a smile.
"I'm sure. Anyway, I spoke with Severus, and he suggested a solution."
"He did?" Hermione's jaw dropped. "What is it? And is it permanent?"
"Well, I'm not sure how permanent it would be, but I think it would be more effective than you simply confining yourself to Hogwarts. There are other repercussions to think of, however."
"So what is it?" Hermione asked again. "What is this brilliant idea that Professor Snape had?"
"I don't think you'll call it brilliant after you hear it." He took a deep breathe before continuing. "He suggested that no one would be able to need you more than your own child."
If it weren't for the fact that Hermione's jaw had already unhinged from the thought of Snape helping her, it would have hit the floor now. That . . . it . . . he can't possibly be saying what I think he is saying, she thought. It's just . . . it's incredibly unbelievable, it is!
"It does make sense if you think about it," Remus continued. "I believe the charm is strongest when the person who needs you is close to you and it is a life and death situation, right? It would be hard for a person to be closer to you than your own child. And as for the second – when you're actually pregnant, you couldn't Apparate wherever you want, as that could harm the child. And it ought to still work even after the child is born, for he would still need you then as well."
Hermione gulped. "It does sound logical when you put it like that."
"But you don't want to take that option, do you?" Remus said wisely.
"I . . . it's rather sudden, you know. I always expected to have a family – but not this soon." She sighed. "I don't know. I really don't know. I suppose it goes to show how desperate I am, the fact that I haven't ruled it out automatically. But it's . . . it's too soon, that's what it is. I'm not ready for something like that."
"I don't think anyone is ever completely ready for something like that, Hermione," said Remus.
Hermione looked sharply at the other professor. "Do you think that I ought to give it a try?"
"It doesn't matter what I think, Hermione," said Remus. "It matters what you think. And what Harry thinks. I do hope that whatever you do, you bring this up to him."
"I know. I know I should. And I will talk to him, have no
fear of that. Thank you for all your help, Remus." With that,
Hermione rose from her seat and headed out the door, lost in her own thoughts.
I'm just afraid that Harry'll think it's the perfect solution.
He's always wanted a family anyway, and here would be his chance to start
one sooner than expected. She sighed. And if he thinks
like that, how can I refuse him? Especially as it would hurt him
so much and I love him so much. Especially as it's all my fault that
I'm in this mess in the first place and I ought to do everything I can
to get out of it. But oh! I'm not ready! Not for something
like this. But if he is, how can I refuse him? I don't think
I could refuse him. And that scares me even more.
Author's note: And that is all for this week. The next chapter shall be up at the usual time -- until then, I would really love to hear what you thought of this chapter in a review. Also, I am ever so grateful to Tanaly, danielerin (thank you -- for both the H/Hr and the Ron comment ), Connie, ExcalibursZone (Harry ought to be hiding too, if he knows what's good for him), The Wraith1, Angelic Demon16, PoTtErSPaYnE, Eric MacRorie (I was wondering when someone would suggest that, as it is rather logical, is it not? Only problem is if they're too young to get married, this probably would not work for Hermione), TheGreatFox2000, star19, Fire-bound heart, Amynoelle, MrSpy, xxbabysparklesxx, Korine (I'm guessing because you want to take his mind off of Hermione?), mrs.radcliffe (you and a good portion of the fandom, I'd imagine), lee74, Zekintha (big things can't happen in every chapter -- otherwise, it kind of turns into a melodrama Besides, I like writing fluff), EuphoniumGurl0, Leah6, myman-harry526, Alysha (wow -- am always amazed at people having the patience to read this fic all the way through in one sitting. Thanks!), Falling (or maybe it's because my plots always move slowly ), ray1 (they're already crazy -- about each other flees from bad pun patrol), Jezzi, sunne1, Legolas-is-to-hot-4-u, LeslieGlady, Orlando's Gurl, Wohsi (they have had action, together, I've just not written about it, though I do like to know the backstory and what's going on that's not actually in the fic), Bulma Queen of Saiya-jin, Cynthia21 (yes, as someone once noted, my Dracos are much abused -- it's amazing I can get any to be in my fics ), liongirrl4eva, HHromancefreak, hpfanmelissa, Oh-Dear (lol My friends and I once noted that Hermione would always be hexing us because we'd be getting too touchy feely with Harry ), LuluIsALobster, malu (no, there isn't any real way to be cheery when you have the flu), ace (because the transportation spell only activates when someone else needs her more -- since she never got transported elsewhere, the charm wouldn't have taken her back to him), hopelessromantic2006, surgedragon99, RogueBHS, LiLy NiCoLe pOtTeR, heavenscloud524, Ramy, angelfan2000 (thank you blushes), softballsweeti11, Jen, male-chan and juliet's rose (but that would be telling )for taking the time to review the last chapter. Thanks!