Well, I guess I'm continuing with the trilogy I had in mind all those years ago! I've decided to now write in third person perspective, as I feel this writing style is better for me, hope you don't mind. So, where did we leave off? Ahsoka, Anakin, Obi-Wan and Rex had just arrived on Onderon at the rebel base. Ahsoka meets Lux again and is introduced to Steela and Saw.
Third Person POV
Ahsoka struggled to contain her feelings for Lux during the course of the mission, seeing how well acquainted he had become with Steela, troubled her immensely. After the rebel training session, she realised just how close the pair had become, Lux showing her how to throw a Droid Popper at the correct speed and not to mention the two pairing up together to practice the exercise. Ahsoka kept reminding herself of what her Master told her;
"Always put purpose ahead of feelings." Something that strained her. As dusk was approaching and the sun began setting, Ahsoka decided to retreat back to her tent to take in the reality of the day's events. She couldn't quite process how Lux could act that way with Steela, right in front of her, as much as she didn't want to admit it, seeing him with Steela really did hurt her. Ahsoka walked into her small one-man tent and noticed her cot, she sat on the cot and buried her head in her hands. Thoughts racing around her mind, she constantly had to remind herself that she was a Jedi and attachment was forbidden, having these feelings for Lux was incredibly hard for the Padawan to come to terms with.
"Ahsoka?" Her trance was broken by the familiar sound of her master's voice. She lifted her head from her hands.
"Yes, Master?" Anakin walked into her tent with a smirk on his face, seeing his facial expression lifted Ahsoka's mood.
"Are you joining us for supper?" Anakin asked. His Padawan was in no mood to eat but, knew that she needed her strength for the next few days. She weakly smiled and looked at her master. Ahsoka stood up from her cot.
"I guess so." Anakin sensed the conflicted thoughts that Ahsoka was experiencing. She began to walk out of the tent but, Anakin stood in front of her, this took her back a little and caused her to have a confused look on her face. She looked up to him. Anakin had a sympathetic smile on his face.
"Snips, I sense you're uneasy." Ahsoka's heart began to beat rapidly.
"I'm fine, Master." She replied avoiding eye contact. Anakin rolled his eyes at his Padawan. He was aware of Ahsoka's feelings towards Bonteri, seeing how Ahsoka was reacting to Lux and Steela training together with subtle flirting here and there. You could see the effects that their actions had on Ahsoka.
"You can't fool me, Snips," she looked up at him. "I know how you feel about Mr. Bonteri." At that moment, Ahsoka began to panic, all she could do was just look at him and stutter. Anakin smiled at her and put his hand on her shoulder.
"Ahsoka, it's normal to have feelings for someone. It's natural but, you have to remember that purpose must come before feelings. Remember why we're here, Snips." Ahsoka sighed.
"I can't help these feelings, master. I see Lux and I can't help them," She folded her arms and looked down. "And when I see him with Steela…"
"You feel jealous?" He cut her off.
"I guess so." She sighed and turned back to sit on her cot, still staring at the floor.
"Snips," Anakin breathed out and sat beside Ahsoka. "I understand. I know seeing that is hard and being jealous is a normal feeling to have, but as a Jedi, you need to fight those feelings in order to fulfil the purpose of this mission."
"But, Master," She turned to face him. "I can't just ignore these feelings. I know we're told that attachment is forbidden, but I just can't help them." Anakin put his arm around his hurting Padawan, in an attempt to comfort her.
"These feelings will pass, Ahsoka. We've all been there, including Obi-Wan. All you need to do is learn how to control them and remember to put purpose ahead of feelings." Ahsoka lifted her head and grinned at Anakin, now she had spoken about her dilemma, she began to feel more positive.
"Thank you, master." He beamed back at Ahsoka and stood up.
"Don't worry, Snips, now, let's go get some food." Ahsoka stood up, still grinning at her master. The two exited the tent and joined the others around a fire, they all sat eating their government rations and drinking water. Obi-Wan, Anakin and Rex began to discuss the progress of the rebels whilst Ahsoka dwelled on her conversation with her master. She found it hard to think about what to do with her feelings due to the constant chattering of the rebels, the crackling of the fire and the noises coming from the creatures in the Onderonion jungle. She sat on the uneven ground against a fallen over tree, just staring at the fire.
"Can I sit with you?" Ahsoka looked up to see none other but Lux Bonteri. Her heart began to beat at a faster pace as she looked at him.
"Yeah, sure." Was all Ahsoka could mutter. Lux sat beside her, this caught the attention of Anakin, he couldn't help but grin when he saw his Padawan intensely blushing. Ahsoka faced forward, still staring at the fire, Lux glanced at her as he settled down on to the rugged ground. The pair sat in an awkward silence as they eavesdropped into the conversations going on around them, Anakin's smirk began to put off Ahsoka. She concentrated on the flickering flames of the fire, whilst she tried to calm her mind.
"It means so much to see you again, Ahsoka." Lux said, barely above a whisper. Ahsoka's blush intensified. She could barely respond without stuttering.
"Y-yeah… it does." Was all she could utter. Lux looked at the young woman and slightly chuckled as he noticed her nervousness. He couldn't quite believe that the two of them were together again, the months without her seemed to be endless and how he longed to see Ahsoka again.
"I thought I wouldn't see you again, Lux." Ahsoka admitted, turning to face Lux after staring into the fire. Lux smiled sympathetically at her.
"I believed the same." The two were staring into each other's eyes and the corners of their lips were lifted.
Anakin kept glancing over at his Padawan and her supposed 'boyfriend', checking to see if she had taken on board his advice. Anakin's constant glances caught the attention of both Obi-Wan and Rex.
"Anakin?" Obi-Wan demanded, snapping Anakin out of his trance. Rex couldn't help but chuckle at the General's confusion.
"Huh! What?" Anakin said in his state of confusion. Obi-Wan simply rolled his eyes at the idiocy of his old apprentice.
"I said, this mission is really going to have an impact on our Padawan." He repeated drifting over to Ahsoka and Lux. Anakin sighed as they all looked over to the giggling couple.
"Don't worry, Ahsoka will be fine." All three knew how Ahsoka felt toward the young senator.
"She best keeps her focus and realise the reason we are here." Obi-Wan stated.
"General, if I know the Commander, I'm sure she won't forget the purpose." Rex added. The three men maintained their glances at the two. Lux and Ahsoka were recollecting their journey together on Carlac and Raxus.
"You're such an idiot, Lux." Ahsoka said smirking.
"Careful not to choke on your stupidity" Lux fired back, mimicking what she had said to him on Carlac. The two were chuckling over their memories, Anakin, Obi-Wan and Rex all returned to their conversation. Their laughter caught the attention of Steela, once she saw how close the couple were, she couldn't help but screw her face up as she felt the jealousy burn up inside of her. Lux and Ahsoka were only inches away from one another, Ahsoka still leaning up on the tree and Lux still perched on the rock. Their eyes not leaving the sight of each other, ignoring the world around them. Steela couldn't bare the sight of the two being close, she stomped her way over to the couple, catching Anakin's attention. He followed her with his glance, thinking to himself; 'oh no'. Once Steela had gotten to the couple, they both looked up to see her angry expression.
"Luxy, what did you two find so funny?" She said in a sweet tone. Lux just stared blankly at the woman, as he knew that this wasn't going to be pleasant. Ahsoka decided to step up from the tree and respond for Lux.
"We were just talking about what happened on Carlac." She said, folding her arms. Lux could see the building tension between the two, you didn't have to be force sensitive to know that both women did not have chemistry. Lux quickly stood up before things could get too heated.
"Ahsoka and I are just friends, Steela." Ahsoka felt her heart sink as Lux uttered those words, her eyes widened, and arms dropped to her side. Anakin's stare was fixated on the three, he worried about how Ahsoka would react to the confrontation. He was wary of her fiery attitude. Steela decided to respond.
"The way you were both acting, it doesn't seem like it." Lux looked over to the slightly hurt Ahsoka for help.
"Yeah… we're just friends." Ahsoka said hesitantly, still staring at Lux. He continued to look at her, noticing her hurt expression.
"I think that respect has more to it." She spited turning her glare to Ahsoka, she simply sighed and said.
"I thought that too." Ahsoka turned and began to walk away, leaving a shocked Lux and a pleased Steela behind.
"Ahsoka, wait!" Lux pleased, she stopped and looked over her shoulder, saying a simple "Goodnight, Lux." As she continued to walk back to her tent. They both looked at the young Togruta as she stepped away. Anakin watched as he saw his heart broken Padawan walk away from Lux, he looked over the Senator. Lux looked down before turning to face Anakin, he noticed the disapproving look on his face. Lux turned and walked away in the opposite direction, Steela quickly followed. Anakin stood up and was about to check on Ahsoka, when a gentle hand was placed on his shoulder, stopping him from going any further. He looked and saw the hand belonged to Obi-Wan.
"I'll go talk to her." Was all he said as he swiftly walked towards Ahsoka's tent. Anakin was slightly baffled by his old master's sudden gesture. Anakin sighed as he sat back down, beside Rex. He looked over at the General and was unsure as to what to say.
"Sir?" Anakin lifted his head to look at Rex. He could see the concerned expression on his face.
"She'll be fine, Sir. I might not understand the rules of relationships that Jedi have to follow but, I know she can't be the only one to feel like that."
"I know, Rex. We all have moments like this, I guess." Rex could hear how distressed he was. Anakin cared deeply about the wellbeing of Ahsoka, especially with the current emotions she was now experiencing. he rested his head in his hands and faced the ground.
"In ways, she's still very young." Rex only listened to what he had to say and didn't respond, he knew as well as Anakin that Ahsoka was still young but, mature beyond her years. She was bound to experience things like this that all teenagers have to go through.
Ahsoka dragged her feet across the earthy ground, back to her tent without, she collapsed on her cot and faced the fabric wall, away from the tent opening. She let a single tear escape as she tried not to think about Lux and Steela. Again, she knew these feelings were wrong of her to have, but she thought Lux and herself had that strong bond. Ahsoka had convinced herself that Lux has moved on from her and has fallen for Steela, leaving her in the dark.
"Ahsoka? Are you in there?" Questioned Obi-Wan before he walked into her tent. Ahsoka was nervous to hear his voice but, she couldn't quite care at this point.
"I'm in here, Master Kenobi." She muttered, still facing the back of the tent. The elder Jedi walked in and saw the Padawan laid with her back to him, he sighed sympathetically. He walked over to her cot and sat at the foot of it, glancing over at Ahsoka. She didn't turn to look at him.
"Ahsoka," she turned her head slightly. "I understand that this is difficult for you. What you're going through is something that has happened to many of us Jedi."
"I know, Master but, it's just hard. I know these feelings are wrong, the code forbids attachment and I understand that." Obi-Wan knew how hard this was for her, through his own experience.
"I understand, young one. I've had feelings for someone before and the main thing is to keep focused and not let your feelings get in the way." Ahsoka sat up, she was slightly shocked at what he had just confessed to. She thought that Anakin was lying about Obi-Wan falling for someone but, here he is, admitting to it.
"I know its normal for us to have these feelings and in time they will pass, but I just…"
"You don't know how to control them?" He said, cutting her off.
"I… guess not." She stuttered, looking away in embarrassment. Her master out a supportive hand on her shoulder.
"You'll learn through experience, it might be hard now, but you'll soon realise you can control your feelings." The reassurance caused Ahsoka to smile.
"Thank you, Obi-Wan." She weakly smiled at him. Obi-Wan nodded at her with a grin on his face.
"You must keep your focus, Ahsoka."
"I'll try."
"Good. Now get some rest, young one." She laid back down and shut her eyes, her mind now cleared of any dread or negative thoughts.
"Good night, Master." Ahsoka whispered, eyes still shut.
"Good night, young one." Obi-Wan replied, with that he creeped back to the camp. The fire seemed to have dimmed significantly but, there was still I slight flicker of the flames. Due to there not being much light, Obi-Wan was unaware of the young senator sat close to the fire.
"Oh, Master Jedi. I thought everyone had gone to rest for the night."
"Likewise." He replied, sitting beside Lux. Obi-Wan could sense Lux was uneasy, similarly to Ahsoka. He stroked his auburn beard as he gazed into the fire.
"Master Jedi?" He broke out of his trance and turned to face the young man beside him. "Why are you still awake?" Lux asked out of curiosity. Obi-Wan slightly chuckled.
"No reason, Bonteri. Now, how about yourself? Surely you need your rest for tomorrow."
"I know… I guess I just can't sleep." He knew exactly why the young senator was struggling to sleep, his feelings towards both Ahsoka and Steela racing around his mind.
"Have you spoken to Ahsoka?" Lux asked almost pleading. The older Jedi was unsure of how to answer. He didn't want to involve himself in Lux and Ahsoka's relationship but, he didn't want to lie to the young senator. He wanted to guide Lux and give him advice but had no desire of stirring the pot between the two.
"Yes, I have." Was all he responded. Lux bombarded him with questions after that. Asking Obi-Wan what him and Ahsoka had discussed and if she was upset with him, to which he replied with blunt and simple answers. He began to lose interest slightly.
"Does she still have feelings for me?" Once Lux had asked that, it caught Obi-Wan's attention again. He shot a questioning look at the senator and then sighed, looking away. "She doesn't, does she?" Lux said, feeling sorry for himself. Obi-Wan stood up, calling it a night, he began to walk away but, he felt guilty for not answering Lux. After two steps, he looked back at the young man and said:
"That's something the two of you are going to have to discuss." He continued to walk towards his own tent when Lux perked up once again.
"Wait, Master Jedi!" Obi-Wan stopped once again to face Lux, slightly annoyed because he was groggy from the exhaustion. "Please tell me… have I hurt Ahsoka?" he turned and faced away from the senator and simply said:
"Just be grateful that I'm not Anakin."
Well, that's it for now! Again, I'm sorry that it took me a while to upload this but, I've had work and Uni, so I've been quite busy. However, I aim to upload at least once every month from now on and I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! I decided that I was going to make it slightly longer to compensate for my absence. Okay, tell me what you thought and I'll be back soon with Chapter 18!
