I decided that if I was going to be in Diagon Alley without arousing suspicion, I needed to take care of my appearance. Not a lot, mind you. I'm not one of those girls. But I also couldn't go without at least washing my face and putting on clean clothing.
As I stood in the bathroom, I was surprised at how I looked. Other than some faint bruising I looked almost normal. Pale and with dark smudges under my eyes, to be sure, but not the way I expected. Not changed. Not shattered. Harry and Ron probably wouldn't even notice something was wrong if they saw me like this. Of course, boys are not known for their skills at observing changes to the female appearance unless it has to do with the size of breasts…
I had to admit to myself that I felt a bit better after I swiped a soapy rag over my face and brushed and braided my hair.
I changed into clothing that was a bit baggy and was definitely of Muggle origin for the trip, but I was comfortable in it, and didn't much care if people knew I was Muggle-born. It was no great secret, after all.
I had not left the room I had been deposited in except to go to use the facilities, so I had no idea where I might find Severus.
Feeling a little strange to be wandering around a strange house, I none the less thought I could hear voices coming from downstairs.
I made my way down the staircase and found Severus in the living room conversing with the house-elf that had healed me last night.
Hearing my tread on the stairs, Severus looked up and saw me waiting in the doorway.
I was not sure what reaction to expect from Severus. Maybe some snarky comment about the clothing I had chosen, or perhaps about his having to rescue me like he was some Gryffindor, or something classically Snape.
I was therefore stunned that his only reaction was a quirk of the lips and a half-nod in my direction.
"Are you ready, then?" he asked.
I nodded.
"All right. I will Apparate us to my home and get my cloak. We will then Floo to the Leaky Cauldron. I will try to keep my hand on your shoulder while we are out. If you do not feel it, stop walking until I can catch up with you again. We will go directly to Ollivanders to get you a wand. His nephew is minding the shop these days."
"I need to go to Gringotts first."
"Ollivanders will be able to set up a transfer. I want you armed as soon as possible."
I nodded.
Snape quirked an eyebrow at me, but when I didn't respond he just sighed and took my arm.
"Are you ready?" he asked.
I nodded again.
The next thing I knew, I was experiencing the squeezing feeling of Side-Along-Apparition.
Fortunately, it was over quickly, and I found myself in a book-lined sitting room. Severus was already disappearing under the folds of an invisibility cloak.
"There is Floo powder in the pot on the mantel. I will go first, but make sure you follow immediately."
And with that, I saw his hand sneak out of the cloak, grab some powder and cast it into the hearth. "The Leaky Cauldron," rang out in Severus's rich baritone, and a flash of green fire followed. I wasted no time in following him.
The Leaky Cauldron was as I remembered it. It was a strange to feel so different, so changed, and yet for everything to look the same.
As soon as I stepped from the fireplace, I felt a gentle hand press between my shoulder blades, guiding me towards the door. The pub was neither crowded nor empty; busy enough that Tom didn't try and stop me to talk, but empty enough that Severus shouldn't have trouble negotiating it in his cloak.
We reached the door without mishap, and made our way down the street to Ollivanders.
When we arrived at the store, I noticed we were not alone. There was a young man behind the counter assisting another customer in finding a wand.
"How did this happen?" The young man asked.
"Broke it in a scuffle," came the grunted reply.
"Ah," was all that was said.
I didn't want to look at the other wizard too closely, feeling distinctly naked without a wand of my own, even though I was fully dressed. The voice had sounded familiar in some way, although I couldn't place it. It had not escaped my noticed that Severus's fingers had tightened on my back at the sound of the voice, either.
It didn't take long for the clerk, who I assumed was Ollivander's nephew, to find a wand that suited the wizard, since he knew what sort of materials would suit the customer. Apparently, replacing a wand was much faster than finding one for the first time.
It wasn't until the wizard was finished and turned around to leave that I got a good look at his face. I was shocked and thus failed to control the quick intake of breath that marked my recognition.
It was Nott.
In the same instant, he recognized me as well, although he seemed hesitant to publicize his recognition of me, choosing instead to leer at me, angled such that the clerk didn't catch it. Severus did, though, and the grip he had of my shoulder blade became almost painful.
Moments later, it was over, Nott having left the shop to the tinkling of the bell over the door.
The clerk turned his large eyes on me. "What can I do for you, miss?"
"I need a new wand."
"Broken?" he asked.
"Yes." I didn't elaborate.
"Seems to be the day for it. Last fellow broke his, too. Right then, what are we replacing?"
"Vinewood and unicorn hair," I answered, almost choking. I didn't want him making any more connections about me and the previous customer… I also was having a difficult time keeping tears from my eyes. My wand had been a friend, seeing me through so many scrapes and near-death experiences, that it felt I missed it as much as I would have missed Harry or Ron had they been broken beyond repair.
"We'll start there, then." He stood from his stool and went to his shelves, finding a box and returning to stand in front of me. Opening the box, I saw that the wand it contained looked identical to the one I had been mourning.
Picking it up, I gave it a swish, but nothing happened.
"Hmm," the clerk said. Seems that you have changed a great deal since you got your first wand. Recent Hogwarts graduate?"
"Yes." No need to tell him that I had graduated a year early, and really, graduated was the wrong word…
He looked me closely in the eye. "Any major life changes? Difficult situations that may have affected your magical core?"
"Maybe." I wasn't about to tell him what had happened to me since I was eleven. Difficult situations? I was torn between wanting to laugh in his face and hurry to Hogwarts library to start research the types of life changes that affect magical resonance with wand cores.
"Right then. We'll have to open the field a bit." He went to a shelf and brought forth a new box. "Mahogany and unicorn." I picked it up and swished, but still got nothing.
"Hmm. Try this, vinewood and phoenix feather." I tried again, but still got nothing more than weak sparks.
"All right, give this one a wave," he said, carrying another box from some one of the furthest shelves. "Vinewood and dragon heart-string."
I picked this wand up and immediately felt a tingle as my fingers closed around the shaft. I didn't even need to swish it to know this was the one. However, I did swish it, so that the clerk and Severus could see what I already knew.
"I think this is the one," I said aloud as a shower of sparks flew from its tip.
"Indeed, it seems a good match," he said as he began to draw up the sales slip. A moment later he handed it to me to sign, beginning a transfer of funds from my Gringotts vault.
In next to no time, I was heading out the door to Ollivanders in possession of a new wand, Severus's hand once again on my back.
"Do you need anything else while we are here?" he whispered in my ear.
"No," I whispered back.
"Then let's return to the Refuge."
I nodded, and a moment later, Apparated back to the place which in so short a time was beginning to feel like home.
When we returned to the Refuge, Draco had managed to get up and I could hear him bumping around in the basement potions lab. Severus and I took seats at the kitchen table, both of us subdued after our trip. I could tell that we were about to have a discussion, but I wasn't sure of the topic, always an uncomfortable feeling when dealing with the one-time potions master of Hogwarts.
"Draco," Severus called out, lest he hear us and think the Refuge had been infiltrated, "we have returned."
A moment later, I could hear his footsteps on the stairs as he joined us.
He moved into the kitchen and seemed to notice the air of tension that hung over the table. With a wary glance at Severus, he sat and joined us.
"Granger, did you get a wand?"
"Yes."
"We also ran into someone at Ollivanders. It seems that Hermione's continued existence is no longer a secret."
"Who?" Draco asked.
"Nott," Severus answered him.
Draco turned to me and saw that I had paled at the mention of one of my attackers.
"Bloody hell."
"Language, Draco," Snape reproved him sternly.
"So, Granger, what now?"
"I'm sorry?" I asked him, not understanding the question.
"What are you going to do now? What option are you going to take?"
He seemed tense, as though he didn't know how he wanted me to answer his question. It didn't help that I still had no idea what he was asking, and so continued to look at him blankly.
"I believe that my Godson is trying to ask you what your plans are now that you are again a functional witch with a wand. Do you wish to stay here? Return to Hogwarts and Minerva? It may not be a bad idea to let Poppy look at you. Or will you go to… ah… Harry and Ron."
It seemed that he didn't want to say Headquarters in front of Draco, which was all right since I knew what he meant.
But his clarification again left me confused.
I hadn't thought about what I should do now, and I could feel myself beginning to panic, the blood draining from my face.
"Granger, calm down." Draco said, apparently noticing my distress. "Would it help you to talk about the options? Maybe make a list of pros and cons?"
I nodded, not quite trusting myself to talk.
Draco was looking at me oddly, as if he wasn't sure who I was as he got me paper and a quill.
"So, the Refuge," he started. "Pros… you'd be with people who already know what happened and so won't press you for explanations. You have access to whatever you need through Nena, and now that you have your own wand, you should be capable of getting anything you're missing. It's safe, and you don't have to worry. Cons… you're away from your friends, out of the loop and unreachable. And you're with me."
I had been writing down the things he was saying and had agreed with his classifications, until he listed himself.
Was being around Malfoy a bad thing? There was a time I would have said yes without any further thought. But that was before I had spent the last day with him. He had been strangely protective of me… kind even. Gentle? Yes. When he had Transfigured me a nightgown, put me in his own bed, and when he had held me as I cried… he was not the Malfoy I had known at Hogwarts. But he wasn't one of my best friends, either. Not someone who knew me better than I knew myself. So being with Malfoy was both good and bad. I didn't know yet where he would fall in the final accounting.
I went ahead and put it in the con column the way he had listed it, but after a moment's thought, I put both his name and Severus's in the pro column as well. This caused raised eyebrows on both of their faces which I chose to ignore.
"Hogwarts," I said, continuing with the list. "Pros… Minerva, Poppy, and the library. Cons… I would be alone much of the time, and I don't think I'm ready for that. It would be hard for Severus to contact me."
"Not really," Severus said. "We would just use Nena as a go between. But I do agree that you are not ready to spend nights in Gryffindor tower alone."
I decided that Hogwarts was a bad choice. I needed someone close enough to wake me from a nightmare.
With a nod, I continued the list, "Headquarters…" but stopped at the sound of a quickly indrawn breath from Severus. He was looking at Draco as Draco was looking at the table, not meeting my eyes.
"Malfoy, you have to be aware that there is an organized movement against Voldemort. I can't imagine you not being aware that Harry, Ron, and I are part of it. The movement has a headquarters, and the boys and I often stay there." I was looking him straight in the eye, daring him to challenge my assertions.
He didn't, he just nodded. "It makes sense. I didn't know, but I'm not surprised, either."
"Severus, I didn't tell him anything he could use to find it. Relax. Besides, if Malfoy wanted me dead, well, I would be. After all, you left me here with him."
Severus frowned at that, but nodded.
"Right then, Headquarters… pros… Minerva can contact me easily, Harry and Ron are there, and it's as safe as the Refuge. Cons… Severus has trouble contacting me there, I don't have access to medication, and Harry and Ron are there."
"Potter and Weasley are a con?" Draco asked.
"Yes. They will know something is wrong and hound me until I tell them what happened. Then they will declare personal war on the four Death Eaters involved and run off to try and collect their revenge. Never mind that it should be my revenge and I want to collect it in my own sweet time. Meanwhile, in their blindness, they will likely get themselves killed. The other possibility is that when Ron finds out what happened, he will blame me and call me names since he's still mad at me from our break-up. That's not as likely on the one had, or it wouldn't have been had they found me. But now that I'm mostly healed and don't have injuries to show for what happened, it becomes more likely with each day."
"Surely you're joking," Draco said, looking appalled.
"Ah… no. I can't imagine them acting in any other way."
"Gryffindors," Severus said to Draco, "react first and then think about the consequences."
"Excuse me? That may be true, and it my have some liabilities. But it is not without its benefits, too. Sometimes, the way a Gryffindor reacts first saves not only the Gryffindor, but others as well." I was getting irritated. Sure, the probable reactions of my best friends were irritating in their own right, but I understood them. After all, I was a Gryffindor, too.
"Anyway, after almost thirty years of observing Gryffindors at their best, I would agree with Hermione. Those are likely the only two possible scenarios from her friends. It is only exacerbated by the fact that she is female and was attacked in a sexual way, and that her friends are male."
"Severus, Gryffindors do not own the title to that reaction. Case in point, you brought me here."
"Touché."
"Regardless of who acts the most impulsively in times of stretch, Granger, what do you want to do?"
I thought about my options for a moment and looked at the carefully blank expressions on the faces of the two Slytherins. For a moment I thought about using Legilimency on them, or rather on Malfoy since I doubted I could get through Severus's walls, but decided that would be a touch unethical.
Since I knew Severus best and trusted him with my life, I looked at him longest. He seemed to be avoiding eye contact with me. At first I thought it was because he didn't want me to read him, but the more I thought about it, the more it seemed that he didn't want to influence my decision.
Knowing that Slytherins favored a somewhat twisted logic, I tried to look at this from Severus's perspective, trying to figure out what it was he wanted me to do but didn't want to ask me to do.
He didn't want to ask me… because he didn't think I'd want to… well, I had good reasons not to want any of my options. But still, which would have the most benefit for him? Staying with Malfoy at the Refuge, obviously. It would be the easiest place for him to contact me. But that wasn't a devious enough reason for him to be avoiding my gaze. So, assume he wants me to stay here with Malfoy, what reason could there be that he wouldn't want me to know?
Stay with Malfoy… Malfoy? Could Malfoy be the reason?
I would be the first to admit that the Draco Malfoy I had been around for the last day was not the same evil obnoxious git I had been subjected to at Hogwarts.
I had always known that Severus favored Malfoy. I had learned in the last few days that he not only favored him, but liked him, cared for him, maybe even loved him as the son he had never had. After all, only love would lead someone to take the kind of risks Severus had taken for Malfoy.
So why would Severus want me to stay with Malfoy? Malfoy and I have hated each other for as long as we have known each other… six long years of mutual antagonism.
I looked around me, taking in the state of the Refuge and realized that Malfoy had been there alone, with no contacts other than an occasional visit from Severus and a house-elf.
So, apparently Malfoy was lonely, possibly depressed, and Severus seemed to think that having me there would be good for him. That may not be all of what the once Head of Slytherin was thinking on the subject, but it was probably the high points. And he wouldn't want to ask me to stay with Malfoy. But I knew all at once that this was exactly what he wanted to happen.
"Malfoy, would you mind terribly if I stayed here? At least for a few more days while I figure some things out, like what to tell the boys? I don't want to put you out or impose on your hospitality, but I think this is the best option for now…"
Malfoy looked at me and I could clearly see the gears turning in his brain.
"That would be fine, Granger, if you want to stay."
"Thank you. If you wouldn't mind, I think I need a nap after the excitement of this morning."
"If you're not up, I'll wake you for dinner," Malfoy said as I stood up.
I just nodded in response and went up to the bedroom where I had slept the previous night.
Carefully putting my wand on the table next to the bed, I changed back into my pajama pants and a tee-shirt and quickly fell asleep feeling better than I had since this whole horrid fiasco had begun.