CHAPTER SEVENTY-TWO

EVOLUTION

16x02 Sicarius

"Okay! Got the kids breakfast, made their lunches, confirmed that Kaylen is our 7-year-old's friend, but not friend-friend. Boom. I rule. What else you got for me, Prentiss, huh?"

Emily cracked a small smile at her wife's enthusiasm. She was sitting on a chair next to their daughter, who was eating cheerios one at a time with indexterity. Emily stood and walked over to the counter.

"How about a table at that new Italian place tonight?" Emily poured some fresh coffee into two travel mugs - one for herself and one for JJ.

"Tonight?" JJ replied knowingly. Emily stared back silently. JJ wondered why she even bothered asking - when they both got the same text that morning. "You know that's not gonna happen, Em."

Emily sighed. "Yeah, I know," She admitted. "But this is the fourth week in a row we've had to cancel our weekly date night and it's beginning to feel like we need to rename it." JJ nodded her head in agreement. She didn't know what to say. She felt the same way. Emily let out a contrite breath. "Can you confirm something for me? So I can tell myself I'm not going crazy?" Emily asked in a low voice. JJ nodded and smiled nervously. "We've had a lot on our shoulders since we got back. Like, a lot. And I know you're 'supermom' and the boys aren't suffering. But, um…"

Emily trailed off, but JJ knew what she was getting at. She looked at her feet. Emily was suffering. That's what she was saying… "Um, you're talking about us?"

"Yeah…"

JJ closed the distance between them and placed a loving hand on her cheek. She sighed. "You're not going crazy. Just - give us a chance to settle back in. It'll get easier. And I promise, I'll try harder."

"Me too."

"Do you think our fears come out in our sex lives?"

Emily turned her head slowly in JJ's direction. JJ was staring off into space. At Emily's extended silence, she finally zoned back in and turned her head over to look at her.

"Am I in trouble?" Emily asked carefully.

"No," JJ answered with a short smile. Emily turned to face her. "I think about our life sometimes, and I realize it's crazy that we ever made it. And now our whole reality is this giant clock counting down the seconds between school drop-off and - and family dinners and -"

"Dead bodies," Emily interjected.

"Yeah, that too. And the truth is, there isn't enough time. There never is. And that - that's my fear."

"We have full-time jobs and three kids. We're doing the best we can…" Emily replied softly. JJ pushed herself off the counter and meandered her way over to stand in front of her. She wrapped her arms around Emily's waist. She leaned in so that her mouth was right next to Emily's ear.

"Maybe… Maybe we could do better…" JJ whispered against her skin. Emily smiled involuntarily. She closed her eyes and let her head fall so that her face was inches from JJ's shoulder. "If we can't make date night… maybe we can do date morning."

JJ leaned back so she could kiss her. Emily relaxed into her wife's arms. Date morning worked for her. JJ was right - free time was a thing of the past. They needed to make time for each other no matter how unconventional it was. Emily deepened the kiss, but eventually pulled back. She ran her hands up and down JJ's arms.

"When is your mom supposed to get here again?" Emily asked.

"8:15…" JJ answered. She rested her forehead against Emily's. Emily glanced down at her watch. 7:53am. She took JJ's hand and, walking backward, pulled her out of the kitchen.