You're Worth It
Why did clothing have to be so complicated?
You sift through your closet, pushing past numerous sweaters and jackets.
"No, no…ugh, definitely no." You shake your head. You barely even remember where half of your wardrobe came from. A blue hoodie? What looked like one of your dad's tropical shirts? A rainbow tie-dye tank top? You raise an eyebrow. Probably Asriel's, the last one at least.
Did you have nothing to wear at all? The last thing you wanted to do was call your mom in for fashion advice, though the sea of green and yellow sweaters was becoming nauseating. You softly click your tongue. Really have to go shopping for yourself at some point. You loved your mother, but her tendency to buy exclusively striped clothing was becoming an issue.
"Kris, honey? We need to start heading out soon. If you need help just say so." You hear your mother's voice muffled through the walls.
"Y-Yeah, sorry, just a minute!" You yell out, continuing to wave clothing hanger after clothing hanger to the side. "Come on, something, anything…"
You breathe out a dejected sigh. The dance would be starting in about forty minutes and all you managed to find thus far were a pair of grey slacks. You glance over to the side of your room, now messily covered in dozens of shirts and pants. You still had your black dress shoes buried…somewhere. You'd need to dust them off though, the footwear having not seen use since the last time your family gathered for church. You blow a strand of hair out of your face, sweat sticking to the mop dangling in front of your eyes.
Wait, church!
You scramble over multiple piles of wrinkled clothing, a stray winter jacket underfoot near sending you flying across the room. Reaching the end of Asriel's bed, you tear open the nearby closet doors containing clothing much too small for your now towering brother. You quickly shuffle coats, pants, and even a single purple gown, handed down through the family, out of your way in a scramble of movement. Now peering into the darker edges of the closet, you spot your target.
"Of course mom shoved it in there." You mutter to yourself, reaching out to a surprisingly dust-free black dress shirt and dark, forest green vest. You quickly scan the neatly hung combination of clothing, a sigh of relief escaping your lips. No moth holes or chocolate stains. A rarity, to say the least. You quickly don the formalwear over a light sleeveless top, buttoning the shirt while flipping the rigid collar upwards. Reaching for the dark green vest, you struggle to pop your head through, impatiently stopping to unbutton before successfully pulling your forehead past the collar.
You let out an exasperated sigh. The clothes were a bit tighter than you remember, but still good considering you hadn't even seen them for about a year now. The image of your family lined across a pew flashes in your mind, you and Asriel struggling to stay awake during the early morning sermons. You gently smile. Church wasn't exactly your favorite activity growing up, but you did miss having everyone together.
"Kris, please hurry up. I need to be there a bit early to help decorate with the other faculty members!" You hear your mother's voice ring out once more, impatience underlying her tone.
"Almost done, sorry!" You call back, grumbling quietly. More like you wanted to make sure everyone had their hawk masks ready…
You shake your head, returning to your fumbling efforts of dressing yourself. You quickly grab the tie your father dropped off in the morning, pre-knotted of course, and pull the loop up to your neck. Folding the collar of your shirt back down, you struggle to button the vest back up, the tie further straining the material from underneath. Finding some success, you tuck your shirt into your grey slacks, button the sleeves, then drag one of Asriel's old belts through the loops lining your waist. Sitting down at your bed, you begin lacing your shoes, struggling with the thin strings. Taking a moment to look over, you find your reflection shining back from the mirror perched close to the door frame. You roll your shoulders, stretching a bit. Could be worse. Could be much, much better, but…
"Stop." You squeeze your eyes shut, distancing yourself from oncoming thoughts. "He told you to relax and have fun. So that's…" you finish looping the strings of your shoes, pulling harshly, "What you're going to do." You stand up, still breathless from the marathon of fashion you endured.
"He wouldn't want you dwelling." You brush away a bit of lint sticking to the green vest, reminded of the Dark World's residing magi. The near hour-long conversation you shared with Ralsei was interesting, to say the least. You thought rushing into the darkened realm and bellowing at the young mage about hidden feelings would have led to shock and awe. Instead, the excitable prince seemed to be poised and ready for such a conversation. Before you could even explain the recent complications, Ralsei had sat you down with numerous pastries and cups of tea, a pile of ancient-looking tomes close at hand.
"So, I have read a number of books on this matter. Of, um, c-courting?" Ralsei cleared his throat, "I-I have collected tomes from the royal library, so hopefully one of these can be of some assistance…" The robed mage fumbled to the side, grabbing a smaller leather-bound book. Ralsei quickly pulled the volume open to a creased page, "When beginning to…w-woo another, one must always remember proper chivalric lessons. First, when entering a royal estate, be sure to open all doors for the one you care for! Never have them do it themselves. Second, should your partner sneeze, ensure they are given a handkerchief when needed…"
The prince began to stutter, glancing back up at your pained face for a short moment. Ralsei soon resumed his search, rapidly flipping through the book to another page.
"U-Uh, well, how about this section? This says when discussing fair dowry exchanges, be sure to collect all information on the family's collection of livestock and grains…" The younger goat froze. Ralsei sighed loudly, placing the heavy manual back on top of the towering pile. "I-I'm sorry Kris, perhaps these tomes are a bit dated at this point." The Darkner prince shook his head slowly, "Maybe we could just start from the beginning? What happened that bothered you so deeply?"
You struggled at first, to say anything. The time spent keeping feelings hidden made the words difficult to say aloud. Ralsei was patient with you though, sitting for as long as needed to awkwardly state just how much Susie meant to you. You spoke of the late nights together, the moments you felt truly safe with her by your side, how you felt each time she would smile at you. Everything that had been racing through your mind day after day. You paused, your voice straining to describe how only moments ago, your world crumbled. How a single letter shattered all that you knew.
You remember Ralsei fumbling with his hands, unsure as to what words of wisdom to offer. The Darkner prince sat silently for an agonizing period of time, opening his mouth to speak, only for no words to form. Your mind felt far away, locked in an excruciating miasma of thoughts and feelings. Until you heard the mage before you clear his throat.
Ralsei's weak smile still remained in your mind, "I-I'm not sure if Susie…feels, the same way as you. I'm not sure how she feels about Noelle. She can be pretty hard to read under all that hair and scowling." Ralsei chuckled softly, "But, if there is anything I feel confident about, is that she cares about her friends. She wouldn't want you to keep secrets around her, especially ones that hurt."
You remember casting your eyes downwards, Ralsei immediately scrambling for a response.
"I-I mean, w-well, I mean to say that…" Ralsei softly bit the bottom of his lip, "You mean a lot to her Kris. The way she looks at you, how she trusts you with so much of what she carries each day. I…I don't think Susie ever had anyone she could lean on like that." The prince closed his eyes for a moment, "Maybe Susie likes Noelle. I'm not sure. But what I do know is that she trusts you and cares about you. She would want you to be honest, even if it hurt sometimes. That's…kind of what being a hero is all about, isn't it?" A look of confidence could be seen peeking from under the edge of his cloak, "You have people who care about you Kris. No matter what happens, remember that."
Your silence hung heavily in the air. You remember Ralsei rising from his seat and placing his hand on your shoulder, his face beaming down through the gloom in your mind.
"You should be proud of yourself; of everything you have become. But you have to be honest, with your friends and your feelings." Ralsei squeezed your shoulder gently, "Now please Kris, go have fun at the dance. Be with your friends, and relax. No matter what, you're not alone."
You grip the edge of your bed, a lump forming in your throat. Ralsei meant a lot to you, more than he could imagine. You were never sure how everything in the Dark World would shake out, whether The Roaring could be prevented or if closing the fountains was even the right call. You had faced terrifying circumstances throughout your time in that realm, pushing past many of the fears held in your heart.
Regardless of what would happen though, you had people who cared about you. That meant everything. They deserved the truth, even if your hands trembled at the thought.
"Kris! Child, please hurry already!" You hear a sudden knock on your door, instinctively flinching.
Now or never.
Deep breathes, in then out, slowly.
You felt trapped, a wave of students bustling through the school's hallways. The cacophony of voices, laughing, yelling, all of the noise shot through your head. You avoided gatherings like this for a reason; you really weren't great at handling everything at once.
You bury yourself in the corner of the hallway, near a set of lockers outside your mother's classroom. Having already departed, Toriel made her way into the gym before students flooded in, waving a brief goodbye before you were left alone. You watch as bustling crowds waited excitedly outside the auditorium's entrance, chattering amongst themselves in a din of energy. You briefly scanned across the sea of faces, noting many of the students dressed in classical suits and billowing dresses. You look down at your aged vest, slowly picking at a loose button with a sigh.
Maybe you should try and make a break for the Dark World doorway? You obviously weren't well suited for…whatever this was. You shake your head. Ralsei would just shoo you away at this point with an uplifting speech. As much as that may help your self-esteem, you'd just be right back to where you started.
You lift your head out of your thoughts, trying to pick out specific students from the crowd. Out from the mass of teenagers, you can barely spot the powder blue fringes of Snowy, feathers bobbing with each movement. Close by was, unsurprisingly, MK's bulbous yellow head, the student likely suffering through a multitude of awful puns at this very second. You keep searching, expecting to see Temmie vibrating in the distance. You quickly give up, realizing the buzzing monster would likely be buried underneath the much taller crowd.
Leaning around the corner of the hallway, you manage to identify Catti in the distance, face buried in her phone's brightly lit screen. Despite the crowd's constant movements, you can see the feline girl dressed in an intricate gothic gown, much of the material sweeping across the floor. You crack a bemused grin. She was probably the only one who could manage something like that, though you weren't sure anyone would be brave enough to say otherwise.
You continue scanning through the waves of students, unable to spot the taller dragoness' form. A sigh escapes your lips as you lean back into the lockers. You lift your head towards the ceiling, closing your eyes. A strained laugh sounds in your throat. You probably wouldn't feel so awkward or freaked out if Susie was here. She would probably bet you money to jump into the wave of students and crowd surf, or complain about how the food better be worth the wait. You open your eyes, lazily squinting at the ceiling tile.
Or she would simply smile at you, and everything would be okay.
"Alright everyone, please enter in an orderly manner!" You hear your mother's voice radiate out from around the corner.
A surge of students quickly picks up. You immediately find yourself being bumped and tossed throughout the wave, all pushing to enter the auditorium. Within moments, all sense of peace is broken, frustration and anxiety rising in your throat.
"H-Hey, stop that! Come on, cut that out-" Your voice is lost in the push.
You find yourself continuing to be involuntarily guided to the auditorium, any thought of escape buried underneath the flow of students. Finding the path of least resistance, you dejectedly follow along, bustling into the spacious chamber ahead. Avoiding another wave of hyperactive teenagers, you retreat deeper into the auditorium, attempting to find an empty corner away from the chaos.
You shake your head, now able to take in the sights around you. The auditorium had been cleared of the numerous cheap plastic chairs, all of which appeared to be pushed against the edges of the room. The middle of the space in front of you was left barren, the expanse looking strange without seats neatly facing the stage ahead. Students began running about, greeting friends with barely contained screams of glee. You find yourself unconsciously smiling at the display. You rarely came out to the various parties and dances held at school, despite your mother's best efforts. Though, there was something about seeing everyone from school dressed in their best, just relaxing with friends. There was a sense of community you often hid away from. Hectic as the scene was, you felt a smile pull at your lips.
You stagger back a bit, a thin snake-like monster quickly rushing past you towards the middle of the room. You silently chastise yourself; standing this close to what would soon be a bustling dance floor likely wasn't the best spot for rumination. You pull back, finding an empty chair propped up against a darkened wall. Turning the seat back around, you begin to hear music emanating from the auditorium's stage. The raised platform was now lined with a number of surprisingly tall speakers, poised and ready to flood the hall with age-appropriate rhythms.
You fumble in the darkened space for a moment, managing to seat yourself on the hard plastic chair. Leaning forward, your eyes squint at the sight of headphones seemingly bobbing with the music from behind a number of audio devices. You balance on the chair's side, struggling to search the auditorium's stage for any life. Unable to spot any such technician, you recline back in your chair. Well, at least the music was decent. Part of you had almost expected to hear one of your mother's cassettes filled with hymns pulsing through the room. To your surprise, a rather…unique, electronic tune blasted out from the speakers. The energy was certainly more apt for a dance, though the public domain ghostly notes were certainly an acquired taste.
You feel your nerves fire back up, reminding you of the active social space you were now trapped in. You peek over at the western corner of the room, a collection of tarp-covered tables hiding away. You spot a metal bowl with a single ladle hanging off limply to the side, alongside a number of plastic wrapped trays. You gently bite the bottom of your lip. Food could be nice, maybe even a drink to look like you weren't just sulking in the corner? You watch as another wave of students passes by. You quietly huff. You weren't exactly thrilled by the idea of teacher-ordered food, nor was weaving through the crowd of excitable students appealing.
You feel your stomach growl mockingly. Damn it.
You begin to push up from your chair, the cheap black plastic creaking with every movement. You pause to stretch, stopping midway as you hear the telltale sounds of a pair of students getting much too close.
"SCREE-AW!" You silently cringe, noting the sound of your mother's muffled hawk impersonation. Looking over, you see two students immediately distance themselves, arms now awkwardly resting on each other's shoulders. Both appeared thoroughly embarrassed as the night's first victims. Your eyes follow the form of your hawk-masked mother trudge back towards the front of the stage. You breathe out a deep sigh. Maybe you'd pass on food if it meant crossing into that nightmare.
You quickly sit back down. The room soon darkens as surrounding lights are systematically culled, leaving illumination solely on the dance floor itself. Your body instinctively relaxes. At least the other students won't see you in the corner, you figure. Your eyes glaze over the room, picking out a number of recognizable faces. Most of your homeroom class was visible at this point. You spotted many already beginning to find partners for forays onto the dance floor, the rest simply enjoying the company of friends.
Still no sign of Susie.
Your chest tightens. Would it even matter if you did spot her? She was here with Noelle, not you. You just came to…
You breathe in deeply, eyes clenched shut. You weren't even sure why you were here anymore. Would you be able to actually talk to her, say all that was raging in your mind? You wanted to be honest, with her of all people. You cared about her, and keeping secrets with one of your best friends felt wrong. You feel a tremble course through your body. You just didn't want to ruin everything. You had friends, people that cared about you. You didn't want it all torn away, no matter how much pain there was in keeping your feelings hidden.
You squeeze your eyes shut as tight as you can, forcing back a welling moisture. This was a bad idea. You were just going to disrupt everything that made you feel real in this world, everything you worked so hard to connect with. Being honest was important, but not if you just placed your hurt on others. You bite the side of your cheek softly, stemming another wave of shuddered breathe. Ralsei may be upset, but he would understand. He always understands. You would make up some excuse, change the subject if he asked. Just move on from all of this, pretend nothing happened and that everything was just…fine.
You breathe in deeply. It was time to go.
"Kris, you look even more sour than usual. What, Ms. Alphys already give you your group project grade?"
Not him. Anything but him right now.
"That's okay Kris. If you ask real nicely, I would be happy to tutor you sometime. Maybe we can even teach you how to read!"
You squint back down at the floor, slowly lifting your gaze to the mocking face of your avian peer. You grumble quietly. Just give him the response he wants and he'll leave.
"Sure Berdly. Maybe some other time." You force the words out, the lump in your throat threatening to choke each syllable spoken.
"Ah, that's quite alright Kris. Students like Noelle and I, we have to look out for our peers. It's only the right thing to do; to lift others up in our pursuit of educational success. Even if that does lead to working at ICE-E's for some of us!" Berdly cackles, his face twisting into a caricature of mocking superiority.
You grip the sides of your chair, the hard plastic squeaking quietly. Please go away, just once. Your chest continues to tighten, lungs strained as your hands shake.
"Well, regardless! I'm glad to see you participating in our school's extracurricular activities." Berdly pauses, a feathered finger tapping the front of his beak, "Though I don't see Susan anywhere. You two aren't planning anything nefarious, are you?"
You silently shake your head.
"Good. Well then, is there any…Kris?"
Your chest fights a losing battle, tears welling at the edges of your eyes. You felt safe under the guise of darkness, but each moment was breaking what little hope you had for staying calm. You grit your teeth, quickly rising from your chair. You can't be here, you just can't anymore. You begin to storm over to the auditorium's door. All of this was pointless, and you certainly weren't going to stay and be mocked.
"W-Wait! Kris, hold on-!" You hear Berdly's voice echo behind you.
Before you can make your escape, you feel a downy wing clasp on your arm, pulling you back softly. Frustration fills your mind as you snap back, twisting away from Berdly's grasp.
"WHAT?! WHAT DO YOU WANT?" You bellow out at the shocked bluebird, your outburst almost entirely drowned out by the booming music flooding the room.
"I-I, uh…I didn't mean…" Berdly stammers back, recoiling from your sudden roar of anger.
You clench your fists at your sides, breathing in as much air as you can, "I'm sorry! Okay? I'm just…sorry."
Berdly tilts his head to the side, "Kris? Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you…"
"It's okay. I'm just having a bad night." Your body loosens, energy flowing out of you within moments. You shuffle away, back to the wall, resting against the cold white surface. You close your eyes once more, breathing a dejected sigh.
"Hey, if there's something going on, you can talk to me, you know?" You hear Berdly's voice ring out from your side. You peer out from one eye, spotting the bluebird leaning awkwardly against the same wall.
"Yeah, I know." You close your eyes once more, your head leaning back against the painted bricks behind you. Silence hangs in the air between you and Berdly, dull bass from the speakers barely registering in your periphery. Your jaw tightens. This was the last conversation you wanted to have right now.
"Look, I know I can be…" Berdly pauses.
You lazily open your eyes, looking at the now sullen avian beside you.
"I'm sorry Kris, I-I didn't mean to upset you. I know you probably want to be left alone, but if there's something going on, I'm here. Me, Noelle, everyone." You silently cringe at his words. This was hard enough to discuss with Ralsei, much less Noelle.
"I know. I'm sorry I snapped at you." You breathe out a sigh, glancing at the feathered student beside you with a pained smile. Glancing at the ceiling, you close your eyes once more. Maybe if you just stay silent, he'll go do something else?
The sides of your mouth crinkle slightly. That probably only worked with wild animals, not know-it-all bird monsters.
"Hey, I'll be right back, okay?"
Wait, what?
You snap open your eyes, squinting over at the now rapidly departing bluebird. Mouth now half agape, you're left wondering if you should feel successful or insulted. You shrug. Maybe both.
You lift yourself off the cold brick wall, meandering back over to the cheap school chair claimed previously. Feeling exhausted, you lay back in the plastic seating, body willing to simply melt into the background. Your breathing slows, mind finding peace between the steady thumps of bass now far in the distance.
Your mind quickly sharpens upon hearing a sharp clacking across the auditorium floor, the sound stopping in front of you.
"Kris? Is everything alright?" The cheery tone punctuating each word twisted another knot in your stomach.
You open your eyes, finding a curious expression painted across Noelle's face, now staring down at you.
"H-Hi Noelle." You force the words out.
"Hey Kris. You look pretty tired." You watch as Noelle grasps a chair from beside you, neatly folding her white skirt as she settles down at your side.
Your head spins with questions and possible scenarios. You freeze in place, eyes glued to the floor. What were you supposed to say? What were you even supposed to feel? Your mind races as you sense your throat tightening with choked words.
"Berdly said you weren't having a good night?" Noelle leans forward in her chair, her calm gaze meeting yours for a moment.
Damn that bird…
"U-Uh…" You swallow hard.
You look back over at the doe, her lithe form now resting back in the creaking seat. Her hands sat folded in her dress' lap, a flowing white skirt bunching at the chair's edges. Awkwardly fidgeting, you notice her adjust the powder blue shawl hanging over her shoulders. You unconsciously find your mouth creasing into a smile. Her outfit differed little when compared to when she was in the Dark World. You shake your head; not that she would ever make that connection. Hopefully.
An awkward silence rests between the two of you. You force yourself to exhale quietly, refusing to let the choking sensation send you into a coughing fit. You glance back over at Noelle, the doe girl staring towards students dancing haphazardly only a few feet away. A whisper of a smile rested on her features as she patiently waited for your response. You tilt your head to your side, another pit forming in your stomach. You really did miss her sometimes. You never truly stopped being friends. But after your parents split everything just seemed to…stop. You lost contact with many of those you might have considered close. She didn't do anything wrong; time just created a distance between you and her. Or maybe you made the distance.
You silently chastise yourself. Noelle was still Noelle, even after all these years. You may have changed and struggled, but she was still always nice to you. Maybe she didn't consider you a friend anymore, but still. You really had to make an effort.
"S-Sorry. I've just been stressed, I guess. Sorry if I freaked out Berdly." You stammer out amongst the booming music.
"Nah, he's fine. He just asked if I could come talk. He said you looked upset and was worried about you." Noelle straightens the front of her dress, a soft rustling emanating from the material.
"Yeah? O-Oh. Okay. Well, I'm glad I didn't uh…freak him out." You look on at the dance floor in front of you. Breathing a sigh of relief, you rest back in your chair. At least you wouldn't come away from tonight as the weirdo who screamed at another student.
"Hey, do you remember when your mom got us tickets for the carnival years ago?" Noelle looks back over at you, a soft smile painting her features.
"Uh, yeah. That was," You pause, quietly counting, "That was like five or six years ago, I think?"
A creeping smile pulls at the sides of your mouth. That was also the carnival you remember scaring Noelle half to death on the Ferris wheel. You exhale suddenly, the memory bringing a chuckle up from your throat. If the carnival didn't want people to do that, they shouldn't make the carriages so wobbly.
"Angel, has it been that long already?" Noelle places a single digit to her lips, "I guess it was. Sorry, I'm just remembering when you were doing that dance behind one of the clowns that was taking a break."
Your eyes squint, mind racing.
"Oh yeah! The guy was coming out of one of the tents and I followed behind him doing that stupid dance. Every time he turned around, I'd pretend I was just watching the dunk tank or whatever." You feel your grin widening, "He got so angry, I swear he was gonna throw us out because you were laughing so hard."
Noelle lets out a hearty chuckle, "I'm surprised he didn't. I remember he gave Azzy a dirty look when your brother finally tracked us down." You feel a light poke to your arm, "But Azzy was too angry at us for running off, I don't think he even noticed."
You rub the back of your neck. Asriel wasn't the type to anger easily, but two kids running away from an older brother designated as chaperone certainly didn't make him happy.
"Yeah, he basically kept me at arm's length every time we went out after that." You let out a small chuckle, "I'm surprised you remember that honestly."
You hear the doe giggle, "Some of the students dancing just reminded me of it."
You cast a gaze over at the dance floor, noting a handful of your peers bobbing awkwardly along to the music. Despite their best efforts, most appeared to be unsure about what to do with their bodies. One student seemed to be kicking their leg out and…throwing their thumb out behind them? You shake away from the strange display.
"Kris?" You peer back over at Noelle, her tone wavering for a moment. "We're still friends, right?"
"W-What? Yeah! Y-Yeah, I mean, of course! I…" You feel panic rise in your chest, "I'm sorry. Things just got so crazy so long ago and I just…I don't know. I just feel like I was there one moment, and now I'm here. Like I wasn't even present for those years." You squeeze your palm, "I screwed up. I'm trying to get better, but yeah. We're uh…still friends. If you want to be."
"Good. Then we're back to being friends." Noelle states plainly, her eyes brightly shining back at you.
You unconsciously raise an eyebrow. That was…easy.
"Uh…cool. That's cool. I'm glad." Your gaze drifts to the floor again, confusion marking your face.
You hear Noelle laugh, gently poking you in the shoulder once more.
"Stuff happened with me too, Kris. Everything with my mom and dad, school, all of it." You hear Noelle breathe deeply, "We're both kind of bad at this, I think. But I still want to know you're okay. You can talk to me whenever you have something going on. No more of this silent treatment, got it?"
Your eyes go wide, stunned by the declaration. Maybe more of Noelle's personality carried over from the Dark World than you thought. Your mouth crinkles into a goofy smile.
"Now, talk to me. What's going on? Berdly's an ass, but normally you just ignore him. Or superglue his desk shut. What's up?" Noelle eyes squint in a look of pure amusement.
You struggle for words. You didn't expect to pour your heart out to the doe-eyed honor student today. You inhale the cold auditorium air around you, clearing the knot in your throat. You had to start being honest with those you cared about. You didn't expect to start here, but…
"I…I-I was just expecting Susie to uh…be here." A pained expression washes over your face for a moment as you cast your sight off to the frantic dancers nearby.
"Oh." Noelle leans back in her seat, hands forming together in her lap. "I think I spotted her outside, though I'm not really sure. I don't think she's come inside since Ms. Toriel let everyone in."
What.
"S-Susie's uh, outside? But I thought she was…" You cut off quickly, realizing this was leading towards questions you weren't sure you wanted the answers to.
"With me?" Noelle's face curls into a soft smile.
"What? Uh, I mean, no, I-" Your brain begins to short circuit, unable to find the words.
"It's okay, I figured she would tell you that I asked her to the dance." Noelle continues to smile back, her gaze soon drifting to her lap.
You watch Noelle carefully, finding little in her expression to explain the silence.
"She said she was happy I asked, but wasn't…" Noelle trails off, "She said she didn't feel the same." You watch as a flicker of sadness washes over the doe's face. She takes a deep breathe, a pout soon finding refuge on her features. "After all the work I went to drawing the holly on that letter too…"
Your mind continues to race, your face further contorting into a look of pure confusion at the chuckle now escaping Noelle's lips.
"I-I'm uh…I'm sorry Noelle." You curse silently under your breath, wishing you had more to offer for comfort.
"No! No, it's okay. I…" Noelle pauses, the doe girl exhaling loudly, "Okay, it sucks. Like, really, really sucks. But I guess I just feel…relieved? Like, I asked her! I finally asked her!" You stare back at the now frantic-sounding girl, "I would've never done that a few weeks ago. Ever since I had that dream I-" Noelle shakes her head, "S-Sorry, what I mean is that I've just felt a lot better lately. Like I can actually do something instead of just thinking about it all the time. Just being stuck in my own head."
"W-Well, I'm uh, glad to hear that." You state plainly, confusion tinting much of your tone.
"I know, it sounds weird. But it just feels nice to actually try for once instead of being…scared." Noelle's gaze drifts upwards.
A strange mixture of guilt and relief falls over you, the chaos of emotions surging through your head.
"Besides," Noelle's gaze returns to you, her eyes shining in the darkness, "I think she has someone else she likes."
You feel your heart jump into your throat, your entire body going limp.
"Anyways, I should probably start heading back. The teachers have Berdly and I on hawk-support duty. Which really just means we have to help squawk at the students when they get too close. I think Berdly is enjoying it a bit too much though." You vaguely register Noelle laughing among the sea of thoughts crashing in your mind. In the distance, you spot Berdly softly wave at you from the crowd.
"Seriously though Kris, feel free to talk to me more. Don't do your loner silent treatment thing please!"
Noelle proceeds to raise from her chair, brushing creases out of her pristine white dress. The doe girl leans down to your eye level, her face beaming back at you're bewildered features. Noelle quickly turns away with a flourish, soon disappearing across the room. You attempt to sputter out a retort, finding yourself thrown into a coughing fit from swallowing wrong. Thankfully, the near-death experience brings you back, crashing down into reality.
"Susie has someone she…" You mumble to yourself.
You had to try.
Passing through the entryway, you were greeted by a darkened parking lot, the night sky lit gently with hundreds of shining stars. The frigid air crashed against your face, your worn green vest providing little in the way of heat. Your hands instinctively dove into your pockets, the loose lining of your slacks offering a vague comfort against the winter gale. You look around, immediately spotting your mother's red van alongside a number of vehicles hidden among paths lined by trees. Each branch bent wildly in the wind, casting innumerable shadows across every surface. A vicious chill ran up your spine, the cold whipping through the town hard enough to create an audible presence. You breathe in deeply, persevering despite the frost building across your form.
Would she really still be out here? You allow the breath to slowly escape your lips, steam clouds forming from every exhale. Maybe she already went home? She only came to the dance because her dad told her she should go. You silently curse yourself. You didn't even need to go inside and be pushed around by crowd after crowd.
You drag a hand out from a pocket, rubbing the back of your neck. Maybe going inside wasn't the worst though, you figure. Noelle, even Berdly…
You peer down the streetway leading back into town. Dark shadows continued to cascade over the road, trees obscuring all from sight. You begin to step down the front stairway, being careful not to slide on any bits of frost formed throughout the evening. Coming down to the sidewalk, you glide down the path towards town, checking the side of the school.
"Come on, where are you…?" You grumble, feeling the cold creep further into your chest.
You continue to stalk down the side of the school, searching each dark corner for the rather boisterous form of your friend. You roll your eyes. You would think finding a dragoness that towers above half the school would be easier. You hug the structure's walls, the red bricks barely lit from the stars above. The trees encroached faster and faster, their forms taking up much of the path leading to the backside of the school. You found yourself near blinded with each gust of wind, canopies folding over the structure's already darkened sides.
Fumbling around the corner, you come across the field and basketball court hidden underneath towering woods. You peer through the darkness, unable to see more than glimpses of what lies around you. You continue on, slowly pushing through towards the middle of the field.
A gentle sting forms on your face, a single snowflake drifting down and caressing your cheek. Your gaze darts to the sky above, a calm flurry of ice beginning to fall to the ground below. You shiver. Why didn't you pick up that coat before leaving home? A groan echoes from your throat, frustration building with each moment.
"Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it!" You ball your fists, your head swiveling back and forth in desperate search.
You sigh dejectedly, your breath stuttering. You missed her. She was out here, alone, maybe even waiting for you. And you sat around moping in a corner. You find your body limp, fists now dropping flat to your sides. You sullenly turn back towards the barely visible path.
Tomorrow. No matter what, you were going to talk to her tomorrow.
An enveloping warmth falls over you, a sudden weight covering your shoulders. You feel yourself being pulled against a sturdy form, heat emanating from all around you. You quickly peer upwards, finding a beaming dragoness staring down, each fang glinting in the soft darkness.
"Sup freak? You throwing a tantrum out here or something? Sounded like you were pretty pissed." Susie chuckles mockingly, squeezing you to her side. The dragoness' billowing jacket laid over you, Susie having swept the front of her outerwear around in a single dexterous movement.
"What? N-No, I just was looking for you! What are you even doing out here? It's freezing!" You bellow out, relief now forming into no small amount of frustration.
"Aw, you're worried about me? Come on, if anyone is gonna be freezing to death out here, it'll be someone as soft as you." Susie continues to grin wildly.
You roll your eyes. Yes, you were worried! There was frost on the trees and she's just out here…doing whatever Susie does. You look down to the side. Were dragons cold blooded? You peer back up at Susie. She certainly didn't seem to mind the cold.
Susie nods her head to the side, motioning for you to follow her. In the slivers of moonlight cascading across the field, you can identify one of the many trees you and her spent your free time leaning upon. Susie quickly plops down, her back to the oaken surface. You struggle for words. What were you even going to say? You had no idea how this would play out, but at the very least you didn't expect to be chilled to the bone for such a discussion.
Your eyes meet Susie's, the dragoness snorting loudly. Rolling her eyes, she opens the side of her jacket, removing a single arm from the sleeve. Her left arm now freed from the plush material, Susie lifts the side up, keeping the jacket open towards you.
"Wha…?" You stammer.
"Oh, for crying out loud. You're gonna freeze, idiot. Come on, sit down, get under the jacket." The dragoness bellows at you, the din of her voice breaking the cold silence surrounding the field.
You feel your face flare into an intense heat, any sense of cold leaving your cheeks in an instant. Another gust of wind crests through the field around you. You shiver, the burning of your face matching the sear of each breeze caressing your thinly dressed form. Susie continues to stare up at you expectantly, her eyes now buried underneath a loose mop of hair.
Screw it.
You scramble down to the frozen earth, soon nestling into the other half of the billowing jacket. You grab the opposite sleeve, massive as it was, and wrap the cloth further over you to seal in as much heat as possible. Ignoring the screams of self-conscious thoughts, you breathe a sigh of relief. This was pretty comfy, smelled nice too.
Your eyes go wide, realization hitting of how close you were to the dragoness, buried under an improvised blanket. You make an effort to breathe off to the side, the clouds of steam coming out in trembling bursts.
"So, what're you doing out here anyway?" Susie's arm slides onto your shoulder, "Hey, you look pretty fancy. Got dressed up for the dance?" The mauve dragoness turns away, the side of her face becoming darker in the dim moonlight, "You uh, go with someone?" The dragoness' voice weakens, the bellowing tone quickly petering out.
Your breath hitches once more, any residual confidence draining with Susie's heavy arm draped across the back of your frame.
You pause for a moment, grounding yourself in an attempt to stop your head from spinning. You look down, Susie's legs casually splayed out beside your cross-legged form. Your eyes trace back up, examining the new look she was sporting. The dragoness wore a wrinkled ensemble, much of the formalwear likely taken from her dad's old belongings, you figure. Susie's typical worn boots stood out from underneath a pair of faded black slacks, a loose white dress shirt flopped over the waist's front. The dragoness muscular forearms' glinted violet in the dim light, her sleeves rolled up close to her shoulders. Topping the baggy shirt was a simple red tie, limply hanging from the unbuttoned collar. Your gaze soon fell over her typical messy hair. You catch a glimpse of her amber eyes, now drilling into you.
"Uh, n-no. I didn't come with anyone or anything." You grab the side of your arm, awkwardly shifting in place.
"Well, that's a shame. You look pretty nice." The dragoness scratches the back of her head, grinning. Your gaze meets hers for a brief moment, "U-Uh, not that I uh, well, yeah." Susie quickly retreats from her boisterous attitude, dropping her arm back down to the ground.
You find yourself grinning widely, barely able to hide the heat on your face.
"You look nice too Susie." You murmur, hearing the tall dragoness clear her throat.
"Psh, barely gotta try." Susie's gaze continues to drill into the floor, "But thanks."
The two of you sit in silence, the moon cascading over the field. You look up in an all too brief moment, catching Susie's eyes glowing in the darkness. A smile graced her lips, a single fang glinting. You feel your chest tighten once more, reactively taking a deep breath to calm your nerves.
"I just came out here to find you. I heard you were out here and not…in there." You mentally chastise yourself. Smooth.
"Huh? Oh, yeah. Giant crowds, lame music, barely any food. Not really my thing." Susie shrugs.
"Oh, right." You squeeze your other hand, partly for warmth and partly for comfort. "But then why did you stick around? We're you just sitting out here the entire time?"
"H-Huh? Uh, well I…" Susie stutters, exhaling loudly, "My old man wanted me to go, he was all excited and had all of this picked out for me." The dragoness flares her palm, gesturing to the formalwear mostly obscured in the darkness. "I don't know, I was just gonna go chill at that spot we went to by the lake, but then he insisted on driving me over. So, I just took a nap out here until I spotted you throwing a fit in the middle of the field."
You roll your eyes. Susie chuckles above you, her body rumbling.
"Wait, so you just froze out here for like, two or three hours?" You squint back at the smirking dragoness.
"Hell yeah, could've woken up with some sick icicles hanging from my nose." Susie sniffs loudly as if to accentuate her plan. "But if I knew you were in there, I probably would've hunted you down."
A smile pulls at your lips as you wrap deeper into the jacket. The image of Susie storming into the auditorium like a half-crazed beast forced you to stifle a chuckle rising in your throat.
"Sorry, I just thought you would be in there." You pause, swallowing quietly, "I thought, after you went to talk to Noelle, that you…" You feel your resolve draining by the moment, "Ya know."
Susie's shoulders sink, "Right, the letter." She pauses for a moment, a sharp swallowing sound echoing from her throat, "I told her I wasn't really uh…interested." The dragoness sighs loudly, "I told you before, right? Noelle is awesome. She's an amazing girl, but," Susie hesitates, "She can do better than me. I know she likes me, but I feel like she sees me as something I'm really not. I'm not some kind of hero or badass or anything. I just…I don't know. It's complicated."
You squint at the dragoness, her darkened form shifting uncomfortably.
"I guess I just don't see myself like she sees me. And ever since we went into the Dark World with her and Berdly, she's been way more confident and shit. It's great, but I don't really think she should be hanging around with the school bully." Susie's tone becomes strained, a pained chuckle escaping her lips, "Don't wanna drag her down, drag anyone down." The dragoness mumbles, staring across the field ahead.
The freezing air blows through the silence. Susie continues to look through the field, now slowly collecting flecks of white powder. You sense a quiet tremble pass through her form, a substantial amount of strength being used just to retain some semblance of calm. You watch as the clouds from her maw puff out in sporadic bursts, her breathing becoming strained.
You feel the gale burn your own face, an anger passing over your frozen form. You feel a fury rise up from your core, frustration building with each moment.
"That's bullshit." You mutter.
"W-What?" Susie stammers out.
"That's bullshit and you know it." You shake your head, the cold a long-forgotten afterthought.
"Kris, look, it's cool, you don't gotta-"
"No, it's not cool! Susie, you are a hero! You are a badass! You've saved lives, you saved the entire town! They may not know it out there, but I do! You're a good person, and you deserve to be happy." You feel your hands begin to tremble, "You saved my life, over and over again. You've protected me from so much in the Dark World. You've kept me going there and…"
You feel yourself losing the words, "A-And here. I-I've been…I don't know! I feel like I'm not even me sometimes. But when you're around, it just feels like I'm here. Like everything is okay." You try to glance at Susie, quickly diverting your gaze back downwards. "I feel safe around you. You make me happy."
You feel your breathing shudder, adrenaline and embarrassment hitting you in waves. Among these feelings though, there was relief.
"You deserve to be happy. The idea that you'd drag anyone down is bullshit." You breathe deeply, "I want you to be happy, no matter what. Even if that's with someone else. Even if…"
You feel the energy leave you, the burst of determination now dissipating. Your words trail off, leaving your body limp and mind empty. You shook viciously, your body trembling in the cold. You were scared in that moment. You didn't want to lose her.
But she deserved to be happy. No matter what.
"Okay." You hear the dragoness slowly mutter.
"Susie, I-" You feel the words drop from your lips, quickly silenced as you feel the dragoness' other arm rest on you. The weight sinks down into your form as you look up on the darkened streaks lining Susie's face. A pained smile wracked her features as she leaned on you. You feel Susie turn to you, inches away from your face. The warmth of her breath paints your neck as you struggle to find words. You soon feel Susie lean her head down, her forehead now touching yours. You feel breathless, only the sound of your heart surging through. The jacket now blanked and surrounded you, closing you away from the world.
"Okay?" You whisper.
"Okay." The dragoness murmurs back.
You stay like this, frozen. You're slowly pulled closer, inch by inch. You feel the dragoness' wrinkled shirt embrace against your own, now holding you close enough to hear a dull thump in her chest. You feel your breathing become slower, the frigid temperature no longer tearing into you. You feel safe.
A gentle powder begins to collect, blanketing much of the jacket and your hair in white dust. Your mind barely registers how much time had passed, the cold slowly breaking you away from the reverie. You feel yourself bundled together in Susie's heavy form, her warm breathes caressing your face. For once, you simply smile, the panic in your chest and mind silenced in this moment.
A gust of wind tears through the field around you, whipping across you and Susie. You shiver ever so slightly, a worry beginning to creep into your mind. The dragoness radiated warmth, though the winter chill continued to pick up with each passing moment. You didn't want to break away from this, but the dusting of snow collecting in Susie's mane began to concern you.
You slowly begin to pull away from the embrace, noticing Susie's eyes fill with surprise and worry. Your heart hurt in the moment, but you steeled yourself nonetheless. You weren't going to let her be frozen. You wracked your brain, mentally cycling through where you could go away from all others. Your gaze softens. If you were going to be honest, you may as well be honest about everything.
A worried smile pulled at your lips. You knew where you could go.
"Susie?" You mutter softly.
The dragoness shifts her head back for a moment, eyes now focused solely on you.
"There's…something I want to show you." You quietly mutter.
You grab Susie's hand, pulling gently for her to follow. Escaping the cover of the downy jacket, you stand up, the dragoness pulling up to your level. You feel a wild grin on your face, trepidation and excitement hitting you in waves. You guide Susie away from the tree's cover, her eyes widening at your excited pace.
"W-Wha…? Hey, Kris!?" The dragoness stammers.
"Just trust me!" You shine a smile back at the scaled girl, pulling her towards the school.
You quickly come back to the side of the building; the moonlit path clear to see. Your mind racing, you barely notice snow now rapidly falling in a blanket of powder across the field. You continue leading Susie back to the entrance of the school, wind rapidly dusting the world around you with ice. The wave of cold surges down into your core, determination and need for shelter pushing you forward. You move to the school's steps, gracefully opening the door for the dragoness behind you.
"Uh, thanks?" Susie looks at you quizzically, struggling to come up with a witty retort.
You shamble into the darkened building, moonlight gently cascading through the door. You pass down the hallway, past the door to the auditorium. The dance's noise continued to vibrate through the halls, a glow of light coming from underneath the doorframe.
"Come on Kris, you're not taking me in there, are you? I told you already-" Susie's complaints were cut short as you grabbed her hand once more, pulling her further down the hallway.
"Just trust me." You push forward, hoping that your confidence lasts just a few moments longer.
The dragoness rolls her eyes, a bemused grin curling upon her lips. She continues following you, down past the hallway and lockers. You come to a stop soon after, now facing the entrance to an entirely different realm.
"Uh, we going to see Ralsei or something? Come on Kris, I'm not really looking for tea time right now…" Susie mutters quietly.
"Oh for crying out loud, come on already." Mock annoyance sounds in your voice as you grin back at the dragoness.
You gently push open the doors, inviting a gust of wind into the world below. You turn back around, Susie's face marked with vague confusion. You take a deep breath, grab the dragoness' palm once more, then leap into the abyss below.
"W-WAIT! KRIS!" Susie's protests go unanswered, her look of panic blurred by the rapid descent.
You close your eyes for a brief moment. The Dark World was you and Susie's secret. Something you shared; what started all of this in the first place. You had explored so much of the land, each corner offering new wonders as you ventured further in. The forest to the east and cybernetic world found in the computer lab were vast worlds completely unlike your own. But with their closure, you and your friends began to explore the land nearby. Bit by bit, you and your friends explored the outer reaches of the castle grounds, pushing further and further each day.
What both of them were unaware of were your own ventures in the world. During sleepless nights you'd find an unlocked window, stealthily entering into the school's halls and back into the unexplored realm below. You never went far, worried of what may happen if you were caught in a battle alone. But inch by inch, you had explored much of the mysterious land. Although the wandering calmed your nerves on difficult nights, a tinge of guilt always plagued your hidden explorations. You never lied about them necessarily, but it was just another secret that you didn't want to keep anymore.
You land with a flourish, kneeling down to absorb much of the impact. Standing up, you take note of the armor now framing your body. Looking over at a now pouting Susie, you notice that her leather jacket and boots remain the same as they ever were in this world. You silently click your tongue. Some part of you was hoping new clothes would mean new armor. Not that you minded the musclebound dragoness' look.
"Kris, tell me where we're going or I'm going to chuck you into Ralsei's cauldron." You hear Susie grumble to your side, shaking you from your thoughts.
"S-Sorry, it's just a little further. I just want to show you somewhere I…found." You rub the back of your neck.
"Found? What do you mean? We're always together when we…oh you little shit." The dragoness's face curls into a mischievous snarl. In a single swift movement, Susie throws an arm over your shoulder and proceeds to dig her other knuckle into your scalp.
"H-Hey, come on! I'm sorry, I just explored a little bit!" You plead with the dragoness, attempting to wrench yourself away.
"Yeah yeah, lead the way freak." Susie cackles, gesturing you forward.
You quickly tousle your hair in an effort to repair any damage, then proceed to march down the entryway hall. Soon your vision is filled with a number of signs and lights, glowing softly to indicate many were still open (and awake) for service. You tilt your head to the side, gesturing for Susie to follow you down the western path. Your eyes quickly adjust to the unnatural darkness of the world, peering down past the pile of rubble from your original descent into this region. Looking further past the rubble, you spot a small path around the mountainside, curling into a cavernous opening.
"There, around all the rocks and everything. There's a cave." You wave the dragoness over, her quickly following in tow.
Rounding the corner, you walk through the tunnel's entrance, proceeding further into darkness. You fumble slightly, nearly tripping on a number of stones lining the cavern's path.
"Kinda dark in here." Susie weakly states, her voice echoing against the stone walls.
"Yeah, took me a while to actually find…there!" You quicken your pace, your eyes catching a glint of light in the darkness.
Rushing forward, you push past the cold stone walls into a spacious opening, now free from the claustrophobic confines behind you.
"Would you wait up! You're a speedy bastard when you want to…be." You stare up at Susie, her eyes cast out towards the sky above.
You turn back around, facing the vast land before you. A rolling meadow of vibrant cyan grass bends in the wind, the tufts glowing when the noise of your footsteps resonates below. You step slowly, noting as each movement brought a wave of light blue color throughout the ankle-deep foliage, splashes of cyan echoing out like ripples of water. You softly snap your fingers, the sound sending further ripples out from your position across the field. Looking up, a clear abyss endlessly scaled into the sky. Hundreds of sparkling cyan stars dotted the sunless sea, casting little light down to the ground below. The world seemed endless from this point, plains and sky pushing on forever into the horizon.
You breathe in deeply, soon turning back to the awestruck dragoness before you.
"I found this place maybe a week ago. I kept seeing parts of it from the mountainside when we were up there, I just couldn't figure out how to actually get down." You shrug, "I asked Ralsei about it, but he said he's never actually come here. He called it the Echo Glade, it's from some book he read. Apparently, everything that is said or done here is remembered by the plains, that all of these ripples," You lightly clap your hands, sending another surge of color out, "They send the words out forever."
You look over at Susie, the mauve dragoness shining brilliantly in the sea of color. You watch as she gently presses a boot down on the ground, sending a surge of color forward from the audible thump. A look of barely contained wonder paints her features.
"So uh, Ralsei kept saying he'd take us here sometime when he wasn't busy. But you know how swamped he's been with all the new recruits." You clear your throat, "So I poked around a little and found a way to get here. And I kept it secret because…I'm not even sure really." You cast your gaze downwards, further ripples of color spreading forth from the sound of your voice. "I don't know why I do what I do sometimes. But it's something I'm working on. Being more trusting and honest with you guys." You grip your other arm tightly to your side, "Being more honest with how I feel…about you."
Your throat tightens as a knot forms in your stomach. You gently bite the inside of your lip. There goes what remaining confidence you had. You look back up at Susie, cyan lights shining against her violet scales. You watch her breath in, a deep sigh escaping her lips as she walks to your side. You nearly jump when sensing her fingers looping between yours, her claws lightly resting on the back of your hand. You struggle for words, until the mauve dragoness suddenly drops to the ground, taking you with her.
"GAH!" You crumple down to the ground; Susie having pulled you into a sitting position by her side. "Could've just said we we're sitting down…" You grumble.
"You're the one who yanked me into the Dark World." Susie mockingly chides.
Fair enough.
You adjust your body into a less crumpled form, bringing a knee up to rest a single arm on. Looking out over the plains, further echoes of your words (and clumsy landing) pass the horizon. The peace is quickly disrupted by a sudden ripple amongst the grass flowing out from a now loudly grumbling dragoness.
"K-Kris, I…shit, damn it." You peer over at Susie, seemingly fighting against her own words. The dragoness' face flushes, darker purple streaks flaring upon her cheeks. Your heart skips a beat, now able to clearly see Susie's toughened persona fade away.
"I care about you!" Susie roars out, near deafening you. "I-I mean, I really, REALLY, care about you! Like, you know?" A pained expression twists the dragoness' face. "I just don't want to screw anything up, or mess you up, or whatever. But…goddamn it. You're just always there! You're always fun to be around, and you actually understand the shit I go through sometimes, all the junk in my head. I just, when you're around, I feel like I don't need to be anything else. You're cool with me just being me." Susie's voice comes to a whisper, "You're the only person like that."
The sudden outburst takes you by surprise, your breath catching in your throat. Susie grumbles again, the growl sending another wave of color across the field.
"Y-You said you wanted me to be happy, right? All that sappy shit? Well, I'm happy with you. I don't want to be with anyone else, I want to be with you! Like…together. Okay?!" Susie roars, her claws beginning to dig into the top of your hand.
Susie's face turns to meet yours, a look of desperate worry streaking across her features. She continues to grip your hand in a vice, her eyes searching for any expression on your face. You feel like the world stopped, silence cascading across the entire field. Your heart pounded out of your chest, a near dizzying lightness filling your head. You were at a loss for words. What could you say that showed how you truly felt about her? How much she meant to you? What could even express what was going through your head right now?
"I care about you too." The words appear regardless.
You feel Susie immediately sweep into you, her arms circling around your form in a tight embrace. Nearly squeezing the life out of you, you feel the dragoness' labored breathes warming your neck. A low growl emanates from the girl's chest, another wave of color vibrating throughout the plains. You're buried in the moment, pressed tightly to her, unable to escape. You sink into the feeling; you wouldn't want to be anywhere else.
"This is your only chance to escape you know." The dragoness' voice rumbled forth, barely above a purr.
"I'm not going anywhere." You fall deeper into her embrace, holding close to the heartbeat resonating from behind you.
"You're probably making a mistake." You hear Susie mumble, face now curling into you. You feel her mane gently fall over you, her maw resting in the crook of your neck. A dull rumble continues to pervade your senses, the dragoness holding you tight to her chest. Your breathing slows, the world forgotten.
"You're worth it." You close your eyes.
The field before you continues to softly pulse, ripples of color echoing words and breathes across the plains.
[Author's Note]
So that was the hardest chapter I've written…ever. I probably went through this close to ten times, editing and re-doing entire pages. So hopefully it all came out okay, I'm just super nervous about this one. If any of you guys spot grammatical nonsense or spelling stuff, let me know. I try to get all of that to the best of my ability, but this was such an extensive (and exhaustive) chapter for me that I'm sure I missed something. But anyways! Already got plans for what's coming next with a whole list of ideas/scenarios ready to go. So I'm pretty excited, hopefully you guys will enjoy it all.
As always, I'm down for requests, suggestions, and criticism. Hit me up in whatever way. Genuinely love all of you guys for the kind words throughout these past two months or so. Every comment and review I've received has legitimately dragged me out of rough moods, so seriously thank you to everyone who even takes the time to read this nonsense.
Now, I'm gonna go melt into my couch and probably read other Krusie fics like the degenerate I am. Happy holidays ya'll.