Chapter Eight: Mr. Washington
"So." Will said. "Let me get this straight. What kind of goddess are you?"
"Greek," 'Dite answered casually, quickly avoiding a drunken man stumbling toward her. "Aphrodite. Daughter of Zeus, goddess of love, beauty, all that junk that I really shouldn't be answering."
"What I want to know," Elizabeth said, sitting down in a messy chair. "Is how you and Jack know each other."
"What I want to know," Jack said, ordering some rum from the bartender. "Is how you know her."
Elizabeth blushed and looked at Aphrodite for help. The goddess narrowed her eyes.
"Hey. I just test you. Not help you."
A look of genius came upon her face.
"Wait!" She cried. "I know!"
She reached into her pocket and drew out a coin. It was silver in color, and had a man with a wig similar to Norrington's on the front.
"What's that?" Will asked. 'Dite was silent for a moment, looking thoughtful.
"This is a quarter," She began. "A complex future machine." She pointed to the man. "I would like to introduce you to Mr. Washington. Now, one of you will call heads as I flip the coin. if it lands on heads and you called it, you get to choose who tells their story. If it lands tails and you didn't call heads, you get to choose. Now, if you disobey this, Mr. Washington will... become an ax murderer and kill you."
"Mr. Washington?" Will asked.
"Ax murderer?" Elizabeth questioned.
"Rum?" Jack suggested.
Stares.
"I do not have a problem," Jack declared. At least, that's what this author thinks he said. It kind of came out as, 'By glu blub have a problublema,' because of the large amount of rum spilling out of his mouth.
"OK," 'Dit said slowly. "Jack. There's something in the future called rehab. I think you need it."
"Can we just flip the stupid coin?" Elizabeth yelled.
"Geez," 'Dite muttered. "What's her problem?" She skillfully flipped the coin.
"Healbs!" Jack blubbered.
"I think that was heads," Will translated doubtfully.
The coin, unfortunately, went flying onto the floor, where a drunken man picked it up, glanced at it, and then quickly stuffed it in his pocket. He soon got in a fight with someone over it, and was the first man to ever have a peg leg!
But that's a different story.
"Oops," Aphrodite said, watching the coin fly away.
"I'd hate to see you with a pistol," Will commented.
"All right," Jack said drunkenly. "What do we do now?"
Three minutes later.
"Now!" Aphrodite cried.
"Rock, paper, scissors," Jack and Elizabeth chanted together.
"Oops. Looks like you both got rock."
"Mine's a boulder!" Jack protested. "Hers is a pebble."
"Come on, Jack," Will said. "It's not Elizabeth's fault that she was born handicapped with tiny hands."
"I was-"
Aphrodite banged her head against the table.
"Rock. Paper. Scissors."
Quickly, the two repeated the game. Elizabeth gave a cry of joy.
"I won!"
"Wait," Jack said. "Don't scissors cut pa-"
Aphrodite, deciding to help Elizabeth to save her friendship with Jack, cut in. "Not in the future. In the future, paper is made of steel."
"All right..."
And Jack began his story.
Twelve years ago...
The brave ship captain stood on top of his ship, carefully scouring the seas. The storm blew across his ruggedly handsome face, irrisistible to any woman-
"That's not how I remember it!"
"'Dite, it's my story-"
"It's OUR story, last time I checked. I'LL tell them that one."
Jack Sparrow-
"CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow."
"Fine. Just shut up."
CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow walked up the stairs onto the deck, bottle of rum in his hand, slightly drunken look on his face.
"Hurumph."
"If you can't pay the time, don't do the crime."
"The seas are rough tonight, Cap'n," His first mate, Barbossa-
"CURSE THAT SCUM TO THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN-"
"Get over it."
His first mate, Barbossa, declared. The captain stumbled closer to him.
"We will go on anyway!" He yelled. "I want to find that island?"
"Apple?" Barbossa asked weakly, offering the healthy snack to Jack.
"No thanks. Rum?"
"Er..."
Barbossa, figuring that SOMEBODY had to stay sober on this ship, wandered away. Meanwhile, the captain walked over to the edge of the ship. At that very moment, a gigantic wave crashed crashed into the Black Pearl.
"Cap'n!" Barbossa cried, running to the deck. Of course, no one knew that the mate would be betraying his captain two years later, the son of a-
"Jack. Stop rambling."
"Hurumph."
But it was too late, and Jack's mind was weakened by the rum, a vile drink that-
"Stop rambling yourself."
Anyway. He began to sink. But deep below the ocean, there was activity.
x
"Uncle Poseidon!" Aphrodite begged. "Can I please stay here for just a bit?"
"You are not an ocean goddess, Aphrodite," Poseidon declared.
Aprhodite narrowed her eyes.
Little did he know...
"But Daddy's making me so upset with all that fighting with Hera about Apollo and Artemis's mother. You know, the one that Hera cursed for eternity?"
"ANOTHER ONE?" Poseidon cried. He really was a fatherly merman, and was worrying about the affect this would have on his other nieces and nephews. I mean, look how Aphrodite turned out.
"Hey!"
"Let's see. Adonis, Ares-"
"Fine," He sighed. "You can stay here awhile."
But Aphrodite's eyes were fixed on the figure sinking slowly through the waves.
"What's that?" She asked.
"Oh. Another drowning soul."
"Hmm..."
Now, there was nothing Aphrodite liked more than a handsome man. And this man, was, admittedly, not bad-looking at all.
"Not at all."
"Vain pirate."
She began to swim up toward the figure, reaching out to grab him. He was unconcious, and since mortals couldn't breathe underwater, Aphrodite took his head, brought her lips to his, and breathed into his mouth, hoping that it would work and give him the temporary power to breathe underwater.
The man's eyes opened, and he looked upon the face of beauty.
"Tee-hee."
"WHAT? Can't a man have a romantic side?"
xxx
R and R! Who do you like better, Aphrodite or Liz?