Lockhart had indeed wanted Hermione to reenact her epic takedown of the basilisk, and he insisted until she finally gave in. Blaise's eyes glittered at her as he played the basilisk, lunging for her as she dodged around him and swung at him with a yardstick, describing what happened in the Chamber. Half of her classmates seemed amused, while half of them actually seemed to be paying attention, rapt.

They left the classroom that day laughing, Blaise's eyes sparkling at her. Hermione smiled back at him, though her breath caught in her chest.

As normalcy resumed, classes taking up their regular cadence and Quidditch practices and pick-up matches resuming, life slowed down to a usual pace – one that felt almost luxuriously slow and relaxing to Hermione. She'd been so tense for so long – since Halloween, really – that the utter decadence of being able to just read a book in the yard alone was wonderful, and she reveled in it.

With Luna now ready to join the coven, Hermione spent much of her free time modifying the ritual they would use to unite them as a coven (the language her books used was old and in Latin, which wouldn't work if they didn't all know Latin), as well as designing the next subsequent ritual they would conduct immediately after in order to leave their initial mark on the world. She frequently worked outside, lounging on the lawn in her school robes despite the chilly April air. Staying outside let her magic cycle freely, keeping her mind and magic calm so she could think straight.

She was really hoping uniting with her coven would help stabilize her core. She did not want to have to deal with this until she was seventeen.

Her friends joined her from time to time. It was unusual to see Slytherins studying out in the open, but Tracey, Millie, and Blaise seemed to draw amusement in it. Hermione was the hero of the school, so no one was going to say a thing about her studying where she pleased, and they took enjoyment from giving overly-nice looks at the people who kept looking over at them suspiciously.

Tracey found it a riot, and Blaise found it fun as well, so Hermione didn't care. Whatever made her friends happy was fine by her; Tracey's laugh was infectious and made her smile, and Blaise's slow, mischievous grin continued to make her smile back, though with the unfortunate new side effect of making her breath catch in her throat or her heart flip-flop around.

Blaise was a puzzle for Hermione…

…and she didn't know what to do about it.

Blaise was her best friend, practically. He was who she depended on the most, who she confided the most in about anything. He was the one whose advice she most trusted, the one who helped her the most when she needed help. Blaise was her solid bastion of support at her side, one she felt she could trust completely.

And then they'd kissed…

…and her whole world seemed to turn on its head.

Why did she now seem to have developed a crush on him?

It was terribly inconvenient, she mentally despaired. And more than a little annoying.

Hermione could recognize the symptoms of fancying someone. Cedric's teasing and flirting had made her blush and get that fluttery feeling inside. His grins had made her heart skip, his meaningful words her heart pound hard in her chest. And she'd caught herself just looking at him a fair few times, blushing and turning away each time, though Cedric just grinned if he caught her - he was rather attractive, and though he knew it, he didn't make a big deal out of it.

The issue was it was happening with Blaise now, too.

It wasn't that she'd ever thought Blaise was unattractive. It was just… she hadn't really paid attention, until he'd pulled her into his arms and they kissed.

And then afterward, sometimes when she daydreamed... she found her thoughts wandering to what it'd be like if he pulled her close and kissed her again.

And again...

...and again.

Though Hermione would have usually gone to Tracey for boy issues, Hermione hesitated, and she sought out Luna instead. Tracey may have too vested an interest in the outcome of any advice she gave her that involved Blaise, and Hermione preferred Luna's detached (though odd) objectivity.

Luna was happy to talk with her in an isolated corner of the Ravenclaw common room, both of them tucked up close with pillows as Hermione spilled out the entire story of the incident with Blaise and her ensuing emotional torment and distress.

"…and I just don't know what to do about it," Hermione finished. "I hate not knowing what to do."

Luna tilted her head. "Do about it?"

"Yes," Hermione said. "I don't want things to change, really—"

"Except you want Blaise to kiss you now, too," Luna said matter-of-factly, and Hermione's face flamed.

"Well, yes, but I'm okay if that doesn't happen too," she said hastily. "But like… what if Blaise finds out? How would he react? I don't want to ruin our friendship or the coven!"

"Why would it do that?" Luna asked.

"Well, what if he doesn't feel the same way back?" Hermione said. "It'll make things terribly awkward. He might even be disgusted. And I highly doubt he does feel the same way back – he flirts with everyone, and now that he's gotten his first kiss out of the way, he's probably going to flirt with people even more and he's probably looking forward to kissing everyone he wants—"

"Your magic is spiraling again," Luna chided. "Are you able to calm down, Hermione?"

Hermione made a face and closed her eyes.

Forcing her attention to the magic inside of her, she took several deep breaths, focusing and centering her magic to lay still against her core. It took a few minutes to settle her magic; when she finished, her core was still spinning crazily, as always, but somewhat less so now.

Now that her thoughts were no longer spiraling in worry, Hermione could think a little more clearly.

"Okay, so Blaise isn't likely to do that," she admitted. "But still…"

"You are afraid Blaise will choose to leave your side," Luna observed. "And this is worrying you now because you've realized how much he means to you, Hermione."

Hermione paused to think.

"I think so? Maybe?" she said slowly. "But… I guess that doesn't entirely make sense. I do trust he'll always be there – he tried to swear an Oath of Fealty to me, Luna. I just…"

"You want him to want you too," Luna remarked wisely, and Hermione winced.

"I… I wish I didn't," she admitted. "Everything suddenly seems so much more complicated now."

"It's not." Luna's voice was assured, her bright blue eyes turning from the window to hold Hermione's gaze. "Hermione, think; would you want Blaise to formally offer to court you?"

Hermione instinctively recoiled at the image, of Blaise presenting her with a necklace in front of his mother and assembled quorum in a grand pureblood gesture, indicating he wanted to court her with the goal of an eventual betrothal. Just the thought of enduring the stuffy ceremony of such a thing made her cringe.

"No," she said. "No. And that wouldn't be like him, anyway. Blaise teases and flirts. I can't imagine him following such stuffy rules. At least not for years, until his mother makes him, if she does."

"Do you want to marry him?"

"I'm thirteen!" Hermione objected. "I don't want to think about marrying anyone right now!"

"Other girls do," Luna said mildly. "But that's up to you. So, you don't want him to court you, and you don't want him to marry you. Do you want him to date you?"

Hermione considered.

Imagining dating Blaise came simply, easily. It was easy to imagine them going to Diagon Alley together over the summer to look for a special ritual book, or for her to take him out into London to show him something muggle and blow his mind. Though it made her cheeks flush, it was also easy to imagine taking his hand as they walked around, or to have him pull her into corners and kiss her from time to time.

"…yes," she admitted. "I think I'd really like that, going out with him and doing things together… and maybe holding hands and kissing a bit."

Luna gave her a patient look.

"And Hermione," she said, "how is that different than what you already do?"

Hermione froze.

"Well, there's—"

"You and Blaise already do things together often," Luna said. "He told everyone about his adventure to muggle London with you, and it was clear he loved it. If you asked him to go somewhere with you, anywhere, do you really think he'd say no?"

"No," Hermione admitted. "But—"

"And if you held his hand, do you think he'd be upset?"

Though she tried, she couldn't imagine Blaise ever reacting with anything other than sparkling eyes, a wink, a smirk, or a tease. The worst she could come up with was him teasing her and gently letting go.

"Not really…"

"Do you think he'd be upset if you kissed him again?"

"Well, no, but that doesn't mean I think he wants to kiss me," Hermione defended. "Kissing is just nice in general, I think. And to a lot of people, it probably doesn't matter much who they're kissing."

If Tracey's gossip about snogging Adrian Pucey was any indication, it was clear that kissing was a fun thing to do just on its own. Tracey found Adrian charming and attractive, but she clearly wasn't interested in wanting anything more to do with him other than just snogging.

"If you're not comfortable kissing someone unless you know if they want to kiss you back, then don't kiss anyone yet," Luna said reasonably. "But the rest of it seems easy enough for you to achieve."

"That's easier said than done," Hermione said, biting her lip.

"You are making this into a big deal, when it's not," Luna said. "Hermione, just because you fancy someone doesn't mean anything needs to change. It just means you fancy them."

"How can you say that?" Hermione objected. "It feels like a big deal! I can't just ignore it."

Luna looked at her with pity. "You don't have to ignore it. Just give yourself permission to feel freely. That's all."

"It's not that simple, Luna," Hermione argued.

"It is," Luna said. "You're just looking at it wrong."

Luna shifted slightly in her seat, taking Hermione's hands. Her eyes met Hermione's, and Hermione automatically straightened up slightly, self-aware.

Luna's eyes met hers for several long moments, her blue eyes swimming with something Hermione couldn't recognize. There was an intensity there, a seriousness Hermione didn't often see, and she realized she had matched her breathing to Luna's without trying.

"There is a false mythology surrounding love that says it's a special, rare feeling, reserved for just a few people in our whole lives," Luna told her. Her voice was quiet, a rare note of gravity to her words. "This false mythology tells us that falling in love is a major life event, about which something must be done."

"Love?" Hermione choked. "I didn't say—"

"This false mythology also tells us that love takes time to develop, and that the feelings you experience at the start of a relationship are not love, even if they feel the same," Luna continued, barreling over her. "We're made to feel like fancying a person is lesser than love, even if it still consumes our hearts just the same."

"We're taught that the word 'love' is very important, a very valuable word that should be used with extreme caution – that if we felt this feeling for just anybody, it makes the word less special." Luna's eyes didn't stray from Hermione's as she went on. "The limit makes us believe love is a scarce resource, that the word 'love' will lose its meaning if it's shared with too many."

Hermione felt like she was holding her breath, listening to Luna with wide eyes.

"But Hermione," Luna said, squeezing her hands. "Love is just a feeling. And like all feelings, it comes and goes all the time. There's no controlling it. There's no stopping it. And there's no shame in feeling it for as many people as you feel it for. And it doesn't become lesser the more people you love."

Hermione took a deep breath, slowly letting it out. She reflected on Luna's point of view, giving herself permission to envision it.

What if love wasn't a big deal, and just another thing to freely be felt?

Could she just really just… feel?

"What is love, then?" Hermione asked. "If everything we're taught is false?"

Luna smiled, and Hermione was taken aback by the brilliance of her smile.

"I think what being in love really means is temporarily seeing the spark of a person's magic and light," Luna said, her eyes bright. "When you catch little glimpses of their perfection, momentarily blinded by the bright light of their true self and their light, and you want to do anything you can to help that person along their path or make them be happy however you can."

The depth of emotion in Luna's eyes struck her, and Hermione found her throat tight as well.

"For example: I love you, Hermione," Luna said simply. "It's not a big deal. It doesn't mean you're The One, or even one of the ones. It doesn't mean we have to date, marry, or even cuddle. It doesn't mean we have to part ways dramatically in a flurry of tears and angry spells. It doesn't mean I'll love you until I die, or that I'll still love you next year, or even tomorrow."

She squeezed her hand. "It just means I really like you right now, being with you brightens my life, and I would give of my own to help bolster your light."

Luna's words shone with such a radiance, such a simple truth, that Hermione found herself breathless and touched. Hermione belatedly realized she was crying. When had that started?

"I love you too, Luna!" Hermione's voice was thick as she wiped at her eyes, though the tears hadn't stopped. "I would give my light to help you shine, too!"

"I know," Luna said. She smiled impishly. "I don't think someone who didn't would have gone to quite the extent to get revenge for me as you did, you know."

Hermione laughed through her tears, and they gradually slowed and stopped.

"What about the kissing aspect, then?" she asked.

"Separate that from your idea of love," Luna advised. "Sometimes attraction goes with love, and sometimes it doesn't. Attraction will make the little fluttery feelings happen, but that can happen without any emotion or meaning behind it, too."

"I believe it," Hermione said, thinking again to Tracey and her frequent secret kissing sessions with Adrian Pucey, and Luna laughed.

"Good," she said. Her smile was happy, and Hermione found she was able to return it.

"This isn't exactly society's concept of love, though, is it?" Hermione asked.

"Society's concept is wrong," Luna said immediately.

"I'm not disagreeing," Hermione said hastily. "But just… going through life with your model, loving people but having it not be a big deal… how can a person make their way through a world that very much asserts the opposite?"

"One thing about you, Hermione," Luna said, her eyes sparkling, "is that you never fail to make your own trail and blaze ahead. And woe betide those who try and stop you or tell you what to do."

Hermione laughed, and Luna laughed with her.

Later, before she left Ravenclaw tower, Hermione hugged Luna closely.

"Thank you," she said emphatically. "Thank you for everything, Luna."

Luna smiled.

"And thank you, Hermione," she said. Her eyes sparkled. "It was nice to talk with you about fluttery things and share your joy."

Hermione mused all the way down to the dungeons, reflecting.

If feelings aren't restricted, she thought, if I'm not bound by expectations of marriage or anything yet, why not fancy more than one person? I can fancy Blaise, and I can fancy Cedric too if I want. I'm allowed to just feel. If love isn't restricted, if it's limitless, why would I want to put artificial limits on myself I didn't choose?

Even in her head, Hermione was careful to draw the distinction between feelings and actions. Regardless of what freedom she gave herself to feel, she knew that acting on feelings significantly in public with multiple people would be something society would definitively, definitely notice.

'Love' is just the strong emotion, then, Hermione mentally classified. And I guess 'in love with' someone is just when you love someone, but want to kiss them, too?

When she reached the Slytherin common room, her friends were at a table playing an odd-looking game, Blaise, Millie, and Tracey all looking at it intently.

"Hermione!" Tracey's smile was relieved. "Hermione, we found this game in an old classroom. Do you know how to play this?"

"Is this… is this Chinese Checkers?" Hermione said, surprised. She took the fourth seat at the round table, between Tracey and Millie. "I haven't played this since I was seven."

"So you have played it," Millie said with satisfaction, leaning back in her chair and folding her arms. "I knew you would have."

"What have you been doing?" Hermione asked incredulously. "Have you just been playing with them like you're playing marbles?"

"We couldn't exactly enchant them to fight with each other," Tracey objected. "And there were no instructions in the box."

"No, it's a muggle game, they don't fight." Hermione laughed, taking all the marbles and setting them up in their appropriate points. "You have to jump over each other's marbles and try to get all of your color to the opposite point of the star before anybody else. It's like this…"

She quickly demonstrated how it worked, her friends listening attentively, before she reset up the game.

"Any questions?" she finished.

"Nope! Got it," Tracey said cheerily.

Millie was examining the board.

"So I need to take over Tracey's territory," she observed. She grinned and cracked her knuckles. "Bring it on."

Tracey sneered at Millie, and both Blaise and Hermione broke out into laughter.

"Trust Hermione to know how to play the random game we found in the dust," he teased, his eyes sparkling. "You just know everything, don't you?"

Hermione met his eyes and felt her heart speed up a bit in her chest.

It's not a big deal, she reminded herself. I like seeing the spark of his magic and light, and my life is brighter with him sharing it at my side. It's not a big deal, and it's okay to just enjoy the joy.

Incredibly, her heart began to slow, and though Hermione felt a warmth spreading through her chest, it wasn't tied up with tenseness or anxiety anymore. She smiled back at him.

Giving herself permission to feel had made her feel… free.

"I know I'm about to crush you at this game," Hermione shot back, grinning, and Blaise laughed, his eyes glinting.

"Bring it on," he challenged. "Shall we play for forfeits?"

"I'm not playing for forfeits the first game when Hermione's the only one with experience," Tracey complained. "Maybe on the third round, if I've gotten the hang of this silly thing."

Blaise glanced up at Hermione and shared a look of amusement with her at Tracey's fussing, and Hermione smiled back.

This would be okay, she realized. Nothing had changed, and nothing needed to change. This was enough, and she was happy just as she was.

It was actually going to be okay.