I don't own nothin so please don't sue me. Wont do ya no good anyway... this is just a cute little idea that popped in to my weird little mind while I was bored at work last night.
"Hentai!" Slap.
"Hentai!" Slap.
"Hentai!" Slap.
"Sango, my love, it's the hand. It's cursed with a mind of it's own!" Miroku cried, once again sporting a swollen cheek.
"The only curse on you hand, monk, was broken the day we killed Naraku!" Sango yelled as she turned and stomped away. This was their life together in keade's villiage. They had defeated Naraku almost a year ago ending the curse of the wind tunnle passed down from Miroku's grand-father.
But still, even though that curse was lifted Miroku was plagued with the in ability to keep this particular hand to himself. He no longer flirted, asked girls to bear his children, or slept around. But that didn't keep his hand off Sango's butt. Or the butts of all the pretty young maidens in the villiage.
What Sango couldn't understand was he didn't mean to grab her butt all the time. He tried not to grab it, kami how he tried! But the hand had a mind of it's own!
"Sango, forgive me. I love you." Miroku replied holding his arms out to her.
Sango looked up at him with sad, tired eyes. She didn't know whether she believe him or not. "I love you to." She replied fianlly allowing him to hug her. Then she got that look on her face.
"Hentai!" She screamed slapping him once again. "That's it, I've had it!" She declared turning and stomping into their hut.
"Sango? Sango, my dear, what are you doing?" Miroku asked staring at her in a panic.
"What I should have done a long time ago monk!" She packed a few belongings in a bag and picked up her weapon. She then stormed out of the hut, villiagers scattered like leaves before her.
"Sango, wait. It's the hand, I've told you so many times! the hand is cursed!"
"Of course it's cursed." Sango replied mildly pausing.
"Exactly! that's what I've been trying to tell you!" Miroku cried happily. Finally, she understood. "He had gotten through to her at long last!"
"Of course it's cursed." She repeated. "It's attached to you after all!"
Miroku fell over anime style.
Miroku got back up and then that right hand started to reach out toward her butt. Miroku watched it in horror. He quickly smacked it away with his left hand. It fell down to his side and he brethed a sigh of relief.
Then the right hand started towards he butt again. Miroku gasped and grabbed his right wrist and tried to force it down. then hand turned and grabbed him around the neck. Sango saw none of this, her back remmained turned.
Miroku Struggled with his hand trying to pull it away from his neck. Finally the hand fell down to his side in apparent defeat. Miroku attempted a weak smile as he took in great breath of air.
"What is your problem?" Sango asked turning back to him at last.
"Sango.. Listen to me, please..."
A half hour later life was back to normal. Sango and Miroku had made up and all the spectaters had gone back to their boring old routines.
"Hey guys, we're back." Kagome called out as she and Inuyasha returned from the modern world. "Did we miss any thing while we were gone?"
"Miroku and sango got in another fight." Shippo informed her jumping to her shoulder.
Kagome sweat dropped, "Again? Why did I even ask?"
"Hentai!" Sango's voice rang out once more followed by a smacking sound. "That's it! this time I have had it!" Sango yelled storming out of their hut once again. "Kirara, lets go!"
The cat youkai obediantly transformed and Sango climbed on to her back.
"Sango, please..."
"NO! No more of your excuses!" and with that they flew off.
"I think she's gone for good this time." an old man stated. No one paid any attention, that was Toshi, Toshi alway's predicted Sango was gone for good.
"We had better go talk to her." Kagome told Inuyasha.
"Why? She'll come back, she always does."
"That's because we always go talk to her."
"But we just got here."
"Inuyasha..."
"I don't want to..."
"Inuyasha!"
"NO!"
"SIT!"
With that the hanyou did a face plant. "$ you Kagome..."
"Now unless you want another you'll help me catch up to her!" Inuyasha grumbled the whole time but carried Kagome off after Sango all the same.
'If I don't do something about this &$ing hand one of these days she will leave me for good!' Miroku thought bitterly.
When Kagome, Inu, Sango, and Kirara returned every one was crowwded around in the center of town. Some people were staring others were freaking out! Kids were crowding to get a better look!
"Hey, what is going on here?" They all wondered aloud.
"Sango! Sango!" a small kid screamed running up to her. "It's Miroku, he did it for you!"
"Did what?" Sha asked as they shoved there way through the crowd. Finally they saw Miroku. Keade was at his side. She was bandageing his bloody right...stump? His right hand lay in a pool of blood beside him.
"Miroku! Miroku are you ok?" She asked running to his side. She knelt beside him. He opened his eyes and lifted his banaged stump.
"For you, Sango!"
"Oh Miroku!" She cried holding him against her chest and sobbing. Suddenly she stopped and the look came over her face. She turned hesitantly and saw... The hand on her butt. Minus one body! She screamed in terror and the hand prompty dropped to the ground and scurried away on the tips of it's fingers. Pausing to jump up and grab ever but on it's way out of town!
"See! See! I TOLD you it was the hand!" Miroku yelled as they all watched in shock.
Years later the weiird, demented little hand would meet a family just as weird as it was and every one lived happily ever after.
The end.
Dumdumdumdum snap snap...