Author's Notes:
after like three months of looking back on this, i have realized that i am cringe. Anyways.
here have a bunch of cool main characters having main character moments such as destroying their peers in a snowball fight.
don't ask me how physics works – i am just here to write fun and post it on the internet and today i decided that fun includes the ignorance of physical mechanics and all of the silly hahas for the sake of the plot.
plus its anime. so it has anime physics.
Chapter 3:
Surprisingly, Aoko was the one who threw the next snowball. Time slowed down as the projectile sliced through the air, honing in on its target and smacking Keiko right in the face.
As the snow comically dripped off of Keiko's goggles and back onto the field, Kaito just laughed.
"Keheheh! That's what you get for planning a revolution against the four of us!" He reached into his pocket, but instead of his card gun, brought out a small metallic blue cylinder. With a flourish, the cylinder expanded at the ends, becoming something akin to an aluminum bo staff. Kaito hastily pushed the makeshift weapon into Aoko's hands.
"Kaito, what the-"
"Don't ask questions! Just- Use it!"
"But-!" Aoko looked at what Kaito had just given to her. It was basically an aluminum pipe. There were a few dents in it, which was concerning enough, but even stranger were the random areas of glitter on the staff, which stained Aoko's hands as she twirled it around in her hands. She raised her eyebrows in surprise. Huh. It was lighter than the typical household (or classroom) mop that she was used to, but that just meant that her hits would be swifter, more agile.
When the next onslaught of snow was launched at her face, Aoko ducked, spinning the staff to deflect the incoming missiles. She looked to Hakuba, who actually seemed to be capable of holding his own.
Unlike herself and Kaito, whose cackles and energetic laughter echoed in the background, Hakuba seemed almost bored in the center of the field. A circle of their classmates had him surrounded on all sides, launching their projectiles at him. However, the moment that even a single flake of thrown snow entered his range, Hakuba would just - step away.
He seemed to calculate the exact trajectory and moving velocity of each ball, and would simply maneuver out of the way just in time. Sometimes, when a ball failed to hit its original mark, it would continue sailing through the air and perfectly smack another enemy in the face opposite the circle. Aoko almost laughed.
No matter how coordinated Hakuba may be, though, Aoko could still see the circle of classmates start to close in. With time, they would just be able to stuff snow in Hakuba's face at point-blank range.
So Aoko took measures into her own hands.
She charged into the circle, ignoring the yelps and "Watch Out!"'s from their attackers. A few snowballs hit the back of her jacket, but she didn't falter. Upon reaching Hakuba in the middle, Aoko took a defensive stance, ready to fend off snowballs and enemies alike if they came too close.
When the next wave came, Aoko batted at the projectiles, exploding them on contact in a flurry of snow and residue glitter. The cloud settled on their attackers, and unbelieving shouts of "mORe glitTER?!" rang out across the field.
Kaito chuckled. This was fun! He'd never had the chance to show off his acrobatic skills quite like this before, and it provided excellent training for his nightly escapades as a certain phantom thief as well!
Kaito backflipped over another one of his classmates when a blood-red snowball flew past his head.
Heh?
A few more whizzed by. He whirled to the source behind the tainted attacks, and saw Akako whispering what could've only been some witch's curse, a newly formed snowball in hand. As she spoke, a red aura imbued itself into the ice, leaving the red snowball Kaito was now grateful didn't hit him seconds earlier.
Akako flung the glowing projectile with scarily accurate precision, slamming the snowball into the back of one unlucky classmate. The snow exploded on impact, and the red aura enveloped the unsuspecting student, and they visibly shivered. When they opened their eyes, their irises were bright red.
Akako smirked as she whispered something under her breath. A rosy aroma filled the air for a split second, then dissipated.
The classmate stood ramrod straight, robotically bent down to pick up snow, and walked over to their classmates. As soon as one of them was within arms reach, they promptly shoved the snow clump down the back of their nearest ally. Said ally shrieked and retreated, a loud "wHAT THE FUCK, MAN!?" echoing across the field.
Crows began to circle overhead, as if called by Akako's witchery.
Huh, Kaito took a mental note. Turns out she can summon bad vibes and birds.
Akako repeated the motion a few more times, and in the few minutes, at least ten more of their classmates had left the field to wallow in their defeat, shivering and wet, while about five others formed a sort of meat shield around Akako, taking the brunt of any projectiles that flew her way. More crows gathered overhead
From the perimeter of the field, Keiko's eyes widened. This was not according to plan. She glanced back at the hoard of the ready-made snowballs that seemed so opposing in the beginning of the onslaught.
The pile was quickly depleting, along with her confidence.
Hakuba-kun was dodging snowballs left and right, sharp eyes helping him to weave in between projectiles.
Koizumi-san was doing something to affect their classmates, and more students were joining her army by the second.
Kuroba-kun was gaping at the increasingly ridiculous number of crows gradually flooding the sky, muttering to himself while simultaneously nailing students in the face with inhuman acrobatics and deadly aim.
And to make matters worse, Aoko had a mop-substitute.
They were doomed.
The tides needed to turn, and fast. All Keiko needed was a moment, a singular chance to boost the morale of her classmates. And, she decided, in that split second, they would overwhelm their four opponents and crush them absolutely.
Her mouth pressed into a grim smile. She just needed a lucky break.
But it would never come.
For Lady Luck had already chosen her Champion, and Kaito didn't even need a second to spot the spark of hope and resolve in Keiko's eyes, and stomp it down.
He leaped, clearing the outer wall of students defending their leader. They flinched as he bounded closer, and he pelted a couple choice snowballs (that had may or may not have been laced with sleeping powder) in their faces. They collapsed immediately.
Kaito withdrew an umbrella, as well as an item from his inside pocket. He glanced to the sky, where the small army of Akako's crows were circling the one who called them here, as if waiting for a chance to dive in for the kill.
Time for a lil' bit of trolling.
Kaito launched the item at Keiko, whose eyes widened in recognition.
Keiko had seen this item a hundred times before. It was the root of her and her classmates' nightmares, and the bane of their existence. It was the reason they had banded together tonight.
She would not let their efforts go to waste.
"GLITTER BOMB!"
As Keiko's warning echoed throughout the field, various screams could be heard in the night. There would be no telling the range of the effect, and the last time someone had underestimated Kaito's bomb-building techniques, the entire school had been encased in glue and chicken feathers.
Thus, the only appropriate response was panic. Everyone scattered.
Kaito, however, simply opened his umbrella, beckoning Hakuba, Aoko and Akako under its shelter as well.
"Glitter bomb?" Akako piped up.
A sly grin from Kaito. "Not quite."
The following explosion sent the field into momentary silence as the bomb's contents scattered throughout the entirety of the field, to the dismay of many. Keiko stopped in her tracks, stooping down to pick up the brown granules that were decidedly not glitter.
"Bread crumbs?"
Kaito beamed. "It's whole wheat!"
And like raindrops falling from the sky, the crows descended.
Kaito, Aoko, Hakuba, and Akako watched in varying degrees of horror and delight as a hurricane of feathers, wings, and beaks swooped down from the heavens above, claws latching onto the nearest stable surface they could find and pecking away at the crumbs at their feet.
Soon enough, the birds took up every inch of the field. They blocked the exits, and seemed very adamant in having their meal in peace, aggressively cawing at anyone with the audacity to interrupt their feast.
Needless to say, their classmates were stuck.
Kaito was not.
"Shall we take our leave?" He grinned as Akako and Hakuba sputtered indignantly.
"Listen Kuroba, I didn't survive a snowball fight to get my eyes pecked out by a bird. We can't get across."
Kaito hummed in reply, turning his attention to the umbrella in his hand. With the flick of his wrist, a control panel opened, and he pushed a few minuscule buttons inside.
"Alright! Everyone hold on to the umbrella!" As the other three fumble for a good grip, Kaito cackles. "Please keep your belongings with you at all times. Kuroba Airlines is not responsible for any lost or stolen items during your flight."
"What does that even-"
"Does anyone have anything they'd like to say before we go?"
"Wait-"
"Wrong answer!" Kaito leers at Hakuba. "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious."
Hakuba sputters. "What did you just call me?"
Annndddd lift off!
True to Kaito's word, the umbrella somehow propels the four through the air and across the field, to the annoyance and loud complaints of their classmates. The height that the umbrella gains them in the air makes Hakuba question his knowledge of physics and machine mechanics. He closes his eyes and tries not to think about how Newton would be rolling in his grave. Kaito sees Hakuba's face and bursts out laughing all over again.
"It's magic! Don't wear your detective brain out too much!"
"I don't want hear a physics lecture from someone with a Mary Poppins umbrella."
"You look constipated."
"Shut up."
Once they touch down at the exit of the field, Kaito turns to face his audience. All of his classmates have swiveled in their stationary spots to glare at him with annoyance.
He sighs, and with the snap of his fingers, white tulips appear at each of their feet.
Keiko is the first to pick one up and read the message strapped to the stem of the flower.
"I'm sorry," she reads aloud.
Kaito coughs, sheepishly calling back the attention and looking somewhat ashamed for the first time that night.
"Please consider this my formal apology, " he begins, "and that until the end of exam season, the four of us will refrain from unnecessary class disruptions. And pranks."
Keiko nods on behalf of the class. "Alright. Thank you." She gestures around the area. As if on cue, a crow lands on her outstretched arm and starts pecking on a crumb on her jacket. "So what about this? How are you gonna get rid of the birds?"
But Kaito just grins and shrugs, slinging an easy arm over Aoko's shoulder and pulling her away from the field. Revenge was definitely best served cold, if he did say so himself.
"We do a little bit of trolling."
And the four disappear down the road, ignoring the indignant shouts and cries for help that fill the wintry December air.
End.
Author's Notes:
mary poppins who? physics how? no idea, and that's ok!
but yess this is my first completed chaptered fic!
comments are very much appreciated, and provide sustenance to the lil writing gremlin in my brain!
thank you for reading!