"Sure" Hotch took the paper "And take your time, we're not going anywhere." JJ gave him a reassuring smile and slammed the door closed.
They all watched as JJ walked up to the house. She was shaking and her steps were cautious. They watched JJ take some deep breaths and knock at the door, again it didn't take a profiler too tell that JJ was petrified going into her old house.
"I really worried about her." Garcia stated from her seat in the middle row.
"I know baby girl, we all are." Morgan reached over from the seat behind and massaged her shoulders to relax her obvious tense body.
They all sat with their own thoughts till Emily opened the door.
"I need some air." Emily got out of the car followed by Rossi.
"So do I." It was then that everyone got out, some lent against the side of the SUV and the rest stretched their legs.
"I don't know" Reid just looked at the house "If it was the old JJ from just a few days ago, I would say she was having some sort of heart to heart with her mother, but now, with the way she's been, who knows?"
An old light blue pick-up truck pulled into the drive and out climbed an old looking man with a bag over his shoulder. He spotted the team and took the few steps over too them.
"Can I help you?" He asked walking over to them.
Hotch walked forward to address the man and shook his hand "I'm Agent Hotchner, this is my team."
"Walter Blaine." Walt shook Hotch's hand "so why is a bunch of FBI outside my house, Its only myself and my wife that live here."
"One of our colleagues is inside talking to your wife sir, you might like to go and join them." Hotch gave the man a small smile.
"Oh, ok then, well it was nice to meet you all." Walt shifted his bag round on his shoulder and walked to the house.
"Garcia." Hotch didn't avert his eyes from the man that was now walking up the steps into his house.
"Yes sir?"
"Did you bring you laptops?" Hotch asked now turning to look at the team once the older man was out of sight. Things were starting to add up in his head and he prayed to God that he was wrong. Hotch took a side glance at Rossi and could see that his old mentor was thinking the same thing.
"Of course sir, I never leave home without at least two of my babies." Garcia said with a little pride in her voice "Do you want me to get one out now?" Hotch nodded at her.
"What are you thinking Morgan?" Asked Rossi pushing off the car. Garcia pulled one of her laptops out of her bag and rested it in Morgan's arms. She opened it and started tapping away.
"Just some hunches." Hotch handed the slip of paper he was still holding to Garcia "Look up this place for me please."
Garcia started tapping away again.
"Is that the place we're going next?" Emily asked standing next to Garcia watching what she was doing.
"Yes." Was all Hotch said waiting for Garcia too find the information she was after.
"Ok, it says… Mt. Horizon High School is sanctuary for troubled teens." Garcia glanced up to Morgan and saw the same reaction as hers at the words troubles teens, but she continued "Set high in the mountains of the North-western United States, Horizon's rigorous schedule of outdoor sports — mountain climbing, biking, rafting etc. — gave students the confidence to face their personal issues/struggles from different forms of….." Garcia stopped reading.
"Different forms of what baby girl?" Morgan asked as he couldn't see the screen to read why she stopped.
"Different forms of addiction, abuse and disorders." Reid finished what Garcia couldn't.
"So, does that mean JJ was either an addict, had a disorder or was…was abused." Garcia's face turned a slight shade of green and hands started to shake at the hell her friend possibly went through.
"Or all three." Reid added and Garcia turned and buried her head in Emily's shoulder.
"REID!" Morgan shouted and pointed to Garcia.
"Sorry Garcia." He pattered her on the back, hanging his head in shame. Garcia lifted her head and wiped her tears from under her orange glasses.
"No I'm sorry, I just don't know how we can help her, she's hiding so much from us and its killing her. She hasn't eaten since yesterday morning; she hasn't gotten any sleep and I miss those bright baby blues of hers." Garcia to pull herself together wiping her tear stained face.
"What else does it say Pen?" Emily asked.
"Ok where was I…"
"Guys." Rossi was watching JJ come out of the house.
"We can finish later Pen." Emily put a hand on Garcia's shoulder as Morgan closed the laptop. They all turned to see JJ look at them and start to walk back to the car when her mother came flying out the door. None of them could hear much of what the woman was saying till she started yelling at their blonde friend.
"GO ON SHELBY RUN! RUN AWAY LIKE YOU ALWAYS DO! AS FAR AS IM CONCERENED YOU KILLED HER"
"Did she just blame JJ for her sister's death?" Reid asked with shock written across his face.
"Yep, and she just called JJ, Shelby." Morgan added.
"Buttercup are you ok?" Garcia asked her best friend with a worried smile.
JJ didn't seem to hear Garcia's question, walked passed the rest of them and climbed into the car.
"How could you blame one daughter for the others death?" Emily asked looking at JJ through the window.
"I don't know. We don't know any of the reasons JJ left home and changed her name, changed her whole life." Hotch said with a sigh.
"Hotch! You don't believe JJ is the cause of her sister's death?" Emily asked looking slightly angry at her boss.
"No! No, I don't. Honestly I'm just concerned about what she's hiding." They all climbed into the SUV and left for the long drive to Mt. Horizon.
The occupants of the car sat silently as they drove too their next destination. Morgan was sat in the back with his headphones on listening to music trying to figure out what was going on with JJ. Reid was sat next to him reading the 10th and last book he had brought with him, in front of him sat Rossi, he was writing in his notebook all the things that JJ had said and done over the last few days, seeing if his and Hotch's theories are in fact correct. Emily and Garcia were sat next to him leaning on each other secretly praying that they hadn't lost the JJ they all loved. Hotch was sat in the driver's seat concentrating on where he was going and in the passenger seat sat JJ. She stopped crying after 30 minutes leaving her mothers and stared out the window in her own thoughts. No one had tried to speak to her, they thought it was best to let JJ sort out whatever she needed to in her head, and that's what she did. She kept going over the same things.
She wanted to tell the team her secrets, she really did. JJ hated lying to them but on the other hand once they found out she would have to leave again. She loved her life at the BAU, she loved her family and her job, she was finally happy and as a child JJ never thought happiness was ever going to be a possibility. JJ knew once they found out things would never be the same again. Shelby is who she was and is always meant to be. Shelby was the mean, nasty and defensive voice inside her head that pointed out everything she did wrong and every failure that awaited her. Shelby reminded JJ of everything that was taken from her, her innocence, her self-respect and even her confidence and ability to trust. She thought that with the mask of JJ, she had all those things back again and everything would finally be 'normal' and they were for a while. But with Shelby Merrick it was just one disaster after another.
Emily looked over at the SATNAV it said that they would be there soon, and she as well as everyone wanted to know a little more about the place they were staying.
"JJ" Emily spoke quietly not wanting to scare JJ and to see if she would answer.
"Yeah." JJ did in a whisper. Rossi closed his notebook. Garcia sat up, Reid put his book down and Morgan shut off his music so they could all listen to the voice they missed so much.
"I was just wondering as we will be there soon, what is Horizon?" Emily asked with caution she had to word what she asked carefully, the wrong word could push JJ further. JJ wasn't aware that the team had done a little research of Horizon.
JJ sat still looking out the window for a second thinking of the best way to answer without giving too much away.
"Mt. Horizon is a sanctuary, it's a safe place"
"Safe from what?" Hotch asked from the seat next to her. He took a quick glance at JJ and could see her slightly chuckling.
"Life…" Their hearts melted a little, they didn't think they would hear JJ laugh again for a long time.
"What's funny Jayje?" Garcia asked with a raised eyebrow.
"I sound like Peter and Sophie." JJ smiled at the memory of the couple she saw as parents.
"Who are they?" Rossi asked now.
"Sophie was my group counsellor and Peter was like the head teacher at the school. He was a blood hound; he could smell drugs a mile off and a human lie detector." JJ reminisced "You couldn't get away with much at this place." They were all glad JJ was starting to open to them and none of them wanted her to stop so they kept asking questions.
"Tell us more about ?" Emily asked pushing her to continue.
"You get sent to Horizon when you mess up in the real world," She stopped, JJ wanted to tell them about the school but had to word it carefully she wasn't ready to tell them everything "It's a wilderness therapy school, it's the safest place I have ever been."
"What kind of things did you do there?" Reid asked from the back.
"You learnt a lot" It was obvious JJ didn't want to go into too much detail, but now Reid was going to push a little.
"Like what?"
"I learnt respect, and how to take care of myself… we were taught how to read a map, solve problems, repel down mountains and I learned how to canoe and kayak," She paused thinking about what else she could say without giving away too much "I learned how to trust people, how to build a fire, how to chop wood, how to express myself, and take pride in my abilities."
"WOW you learnt a lot." Morgan said and they all let out a small chuckle.
"I wouldn't have survived if it wasn't for Horizon." JJ sighed thinking too herself if you can call this surviving. Emily put a comforting hand on JJ shoulder.
They passed a big sign that said, 'Mt. Horizon just ahead' JJ seemed to stiffen "Were almost there."
"Everything's going to be ok JJ. We'll be right there with you."
You won't be for long; you'll leave me soon enough JJ thought to herself as the wooden buildings appeared threw the trees.