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Welcome...to the Nothingness

Chapter 15

Paralyze

The territory is quiet as I stir. The sky is still dark, and the little suns are winking goodnight as they fade into the dark blue sky. I shift slightly and slide out from under Charlie and away from Delta who's sleeping back to back with me.

Slipping from the rock, I quietly make my way into the bushes. It isn't long before my legs are making long strides with the wind whipping past my face. I've lapped the large territory three times before the first rays of the sun reach me. I'm in my fourth lap when Echo takes a spot on my left flank. A soft snort leaves my nostrils as I speed up. I can't stop the small twitch in my lips as she matches my speed.

The sun is just beginning to peek over the surrounding rock as I turn for the watering hole. Echo slides up beside me to take a drink. A smile plays on my lips as I push her in.

Echo sputters as her head pops above the water. "Blue…?"

I take a drink as she moves closer. Falling back on my haunches a soft sigh leaves my lips. "You seem happier."

Echo leaps out of the water and lands next to me. She gives a soft nod before nudging me. "Except the fleshlings still worry me."

First Delta and now Echo. Is there something I'm missing? "Why?"

She looks around the area and lowers her body towards the ground. "They won't let us outside of the territory. Why? Why are we forced to stay here?"

Am I the only one who hasn't seen this? Does Charlie think these same things? After some of the things she's growled, I wouldn't be surprised. I take a breath. "Do you understand what the fleshlings growl?"

Echo shakes her head.

Something about that calms me. It means Delta's idea that Echo's hatch mate could understand isn't a possibility. That means the red fleshling couldn't have—

"Gopher could."

My brow rises. "Who's Gopher?"

"My hatch mate," she answers. "Just like Charlie's Foxtrot, she knew what the fleshlings were snarling. She would stand near the window while the red fleshing growled. What sounded like nonsense to me, meant something to her."

There's been one in every hatching, then. Does this mean Delta is really trying to kill me? Would she kill us?

I blink. Do the fleshlings want her dead? The other two didn't survive. If they plan on killing Delta, they'll have to get through me. Sadly, the only being who could give me an answer doesn't know how to communicate with us.

He doesn't even seem to care.

｡.•°•.｡ɹǝƃunH｡.•°•.｡

Owen stands there gazing. The cool morning wraps around his skin, but he's unaware. The cage blurs together. He thinks he's sleeping with his eyes open since lately, he studies his ceiling instead of the inside of his eyelids.

Then again, he doesn't even feel tired.

He used to feel that every time he took a step forward, he fell ten back. While he grew up hearing that marriage was the ol' ball and chain. If that's a fact, then he was married to depression—which was sad, since he didn't get a night of good times or even a piece of cake for it.

Like a sadistic lover, depression just screwed him over time and time again as it came to bed. Each time it was done with him, he'd find himself deeper in a hole. He'd find himself in a darker place. He'd find himself more removed from the world.

But at least he knew what he was getting when it came to call. He knew what to expect as it constricted around him. It wasn't completely normal, but he had heard it could be a part of life, though it did nothing for his sanity.

Now…

Now, he feels nothing. He's not hungry. He's not tired. He's not sad. Owen does his job, keeps the staff safe, and eats enough to keep Doe from feeding him Jolly Ranchers. He knows when to smile—like when Ben returned. He knows how to explain to the crowds how the raptors work. And he knows how to make deals—like finally allowing Hoskins access to the assets.

This is what InGen wanted anyway, right? This is what he was hired for. He was hired to train dinosaurs, not to care for them or love them. He's been a fool; something the Navy never would have tolerated.

"She misses you."

Owen startles and turns to find Doe next to the outside fence. Her arms are threaded through the bars and she's staring at the silent enclosure beyond the second gate.

Without his permission, his arms cross. Somewhere in the nothing around him, he knows the air is thick with tension. He hasn't spoken to her—and why should he? She's just short of a mixed bag of nuts. He doesn't know why she hasn't quit.

Though, with lack of sleep, maybe he's the mixed bag of nuts. His mind whirls faster and faster with no clear direction, no solid understanding, no firm stance. Does he love Blue or not? Does he accept the true parts of Doe's story or not? The way his emotions drag him back and forth have him feeling like he's lost in a storm at sea.

His voice is distant in his own ears when he speaks. "Raptors don't feel."

Her gaze shifts to him and she blinks. "Perhaps."

He finds himself checking his phone as his chest clenches. Several days ago, he placed a call to his old C.O.—who clearly owes him a favor after the fiancée fiasco—in an attempt to find out who Doe actually is. He still doesn't understand her motives. He barely grunts at her in response.

"Or perhaps InGen wants you to believe that."

His brow scrunches, but he doesn't respond. Doesn't she ever tire of her game? He hears the buzz as she lets herself into the entryway.

"You can't even fight?" she questions as she leans against the barred wall to his left. "You can't say anything?"

What's the point? He's going to fire her. By her attitude and comments, he's done with it. He can't take her ambiguity and lies.

A soft sigh leaves her lips and she nods her head. "They paralyzed you."

He wonders how long it will take her to pack her stuff.

"Have you realized it, yet?" Doe questions. "When was the last time you took a breath? When was the last time you slept? When was the last time you looked at your employees?"

His hands ball into fists. She needs to get her nose out of his business. She's been too involved. She's been too close to the situation.

"When was the last time you sang to Blue?"

His eyes widen. Owen's chest seems to crack. He places his hands against it, searching for what cut him. Did she just stab him?

"Are you ashamed of loving your baby girl?"

His breath catches and his lip trembles. The tearing is coming from inside his chest and he can't stop it. Owen looks at Doe. "I…"

There is no response. Instead, two soft eyes watch him. There's a slight downward tilt to her lips, but it's not condescending. It's not accusatory. It's understanding.

And there it is again, the waves washing him over, except this time they release him. Breaching the surface, a breath fills his lungs as his shoulders relax. His chest expands. Owen realizes he doesn't have to say a word, and he's grateful since he can't seem to find a syllable. She's been down the dark path he feels lost on.

"You allowed InGen to get to you," she says softly. "A lot of people have been there. Most never escape. They never want to."

He tries to form a sentence. There are questions brewing beneath the surface, but none get past the tip of his tongue.

"They're in the business of making money and killers. They only want death and destruction. They will do anything to see this mission succeed."

A thought crosses his mind and he can't help as it blossoms. She seems to have a healthy amount of fear for InGen, yet she's there. It makes him question why. However, it also makes him wonder if she's just trying to save the creatures. But that's not the thought taking root in his mind.

No, Owen wonders if Elizabeth Doe changed her name and she's running from InGen. If that's the truth, then why is she standing in front of him?

Her attention is momentarily drawn by something from inside the raptor paddock. Doe looks back at him. "Blue misses you."

Turning, Owen finds Blue feet from him. Her heard is slightly tilted as her nostrils flare. The look in her gaze is not aggressive. There's a sadness there. There's a question there. He wonders what she would say if given the power to speak.

Blue's glance flicks to his left and she snarls before disappearing into the undergrowth again.

"I knew these beasts would be a good investment."

Shit. Owen tenses. During his paralysis he made mistakes and one of them is coming back to bite him in the ass.

"When do we field test?"

Owen swallows roughly as he turns to the left to see Hoskins approach. "I think I jumped the gun."

Hoskins chuckles, but there's no humor. "You've had these beasts for a year—"

"I've only had the oldest a year, and I'm lucky if they even enter the viewing area," he responds and can feel his heart rate rise. Owen knows he has to get it under control and send Hoskins running, but the typhoon comes crashing over him again, swallowing him whole. The only thing he knows is that he has to protect his girls.

"You surprisingly sent me a report," the man responds. "It was detailed enough for us to know we need to put down the brown one and the other three should recognize you as an alpha again."

"You can't just kill Echo!" he snaps and blinks. His emotions are boiling over like when he forgets about the macaroni water on the stove. He questions if this is part of the process of overcoming the numbing he went through. "She is part of the pack. You kill her, and you risk the others' retribution."

"Then you get those beasts used to working without her."

"They're a pack. You can't separate them."

"And you can't change that one. So, decide." Hoskins' crosses his arm. "If not, I'll find a new raptor trainer and start over."

Owen's teeth sink into his lip and he can taste blood. As he watches Hoskins leave, there are loud shrieks from the paddock, and he knows things have to change.

｡.•°•.｡ɹǝƃunH｡.•°•.｡

My heart is racing as I study the large fleshling from the bushes. I watch as he puffs his chest out—like when I asserted dominance over Echo in the past. He's trying to intimidate Alpha, and I wonder if he will succeed.

Echo growl sounds in my left ear. "He's horrible."

A wave of panic from her overwhelms me, and I turn to her. Her eyes are slits, her breath comes in spurts. Claws patter on the ground as her tail swishes from side to side.

I lean forward and touch my nose to her shoulder.

Echo tenses before looking at me. "I've seen him once…before I saw my first full moon. He paid attention to Gopher—growled things to her, gave her meat, bared his teeth…"

"And now he wants to kill her."

I spin around to find Delta's narrow eyes observing the large fleshling and Alpha. Her tail is stiff, teeth bared. Charlie nestles herself against my right haunch. Her entire body is shaking.

"He wants Echo dead," Delta snarls. "Or Alpha goes."

Echo shrinks away from us and cowers to the ground. Charlie whimpers and nudges my leg.

My talon taps against the ground. Moving from Charlie, I bare my teeth as I stand over Echo, gaze on her. Shuddering, she curls into a ball and exposes her neck. My tail swishes as my jaws open with a shriek.

"Then he'll have to kill us all!" I turn to Delta. "I will not allow the fleshlings to kill any of us! Even if that means we lose Alpha."

｡.•°•.｡ɹǝƃunH｡.•°•.｡

"How do I fix it?"

Her brow furrows slightly as she rubs a heavy-lidded eye. "What?"

"You said Blue misses me," Owen tells Doe. He taps his foot. There has to be a way to save Echo. If he can show Hoskins that they can work as a pack, maybe his four girls can be safe. Before he can test this theory though, he has to mend impossible bridges with his baby girl. "How do I fix what happened with me and Blue?"

"Blue and me," she mutters and leans her head against the door frame. He watches her body sag slightly and reaches out to poke her before freezing as she continues. "Part of the DNA in Blue comes from the Black-Throated African Monitor Lizard. You can keep them as pets."

He shakes his head. "And?"

She pushes herself away from the door frame and yawns before casting a glance at the clock which reads 2:15 AM. "They are very similar to dogs when given proper care. There's a reward for the attention and love you give to them. Their demeanor is gentle, calm, and often times they are very quiet.

"However, they become aggressive—hostile—if they are not frequently handled," she says and blinks slowly. "Owners go for walks with their monitor. It provides them with another opportunity to get exercise and enjoy the sunlight."

Owen crosses his arms. "So, how do I stop Blue from being hostile? I can't exactly walk her around the park anymore."

Doe slips on a pair of flip-flops as she exits with him following. After shutting the door, she walks down the stairs. "That's easier said than done."

"Where are you going this late? We're having a conversation and the park is closed."

Doe reaches the bottom of the stairs and turns toward him. "You woke me up. Clearly, this is important to you. You don't want InGen to succeed, so, we're going to the paddock."

Leaning against the wall, Owen looks at her. She's struggling to throw her hair in a messy bun and only succeeds in half the battle as the majority of the left side rests on her shoulder and back. He isn't sure if she knows her shoes are on backward yet, nor that she's in fox pajama pants and ready to go face killer dinosaurs.

"Are you coming, or not?" she questions and leans against the wall.

Owen takes a breath and leads her to the Jeep. Opening the door, he watches as she climbs in. He then climbs in on the driver's side. Again, he can't help but feel as if she has intimate details of InGen. She knows so much about them and possibly their creations—much more than he's ever learned about Blue in all his time with her.

By the time they reach the paddock, she's passed out against the seat. Perhaps he should have brought her coffee. Climbing out, he walks to her side of the car.

"Doe?" he calls, but she doesn't move. He shoves her gently. "Elizabeth?"

Her body tenses as she gasps and looks around. She doesn't say much, but Owen can see she's trying to figure out where she is.

"Raptor paddock, remember?" he questions.

Her brow furrows as her eyes dart around the darkened place. It takes a few moments, but she finally nods and climbs out. Rubbing her shoulders, Doe walks to the guard room and opens it.

Owen feels as if he should be surprised to see Kevin the guard sleeping. It helps shine some light on how Doe was able to feed Blue without a problem.

Doe snaps her fingers and Kevin leaps out of his chair mid-snore. His wide eyes settle on them. "Mr. Grady, I'm so sorry—"

"It's Owen, and don't worry about it." He's too curious to care, anyway. Doe is typing on one of the computers and he watches as a buzzard sounds and three of the raptors make their way to their pens.

He moves next to her. "What are they doing?"

"Please don't tell anyone," Doe says with a wave to Kevin whose cheeks are cherry red as he keeps stuttering sorry. Exiting, Doe leads him to the paddock and looks at him. "Three of them are in their cages. Giving you the chance to greet Blue on your own."

He shakes his head. "She'll eat me."

That comment seems to strike her weird since her brow rises as if he's missing something clearly important. "You wanted me to help you fix things."

"Not by doing something stupid."

"Stupid?"

"Yeah, this idea is stupid," Owen says and crosses his arms. There is no way he's going to waltz into the paddock. He knows he'll be eaten alive. "These are vicious, intelligent creatures that will kill as soon as they have a chance."

"That's InGen talking and thinking for you," she counters, and her eyes are now fully opened. "However, InGen seemed to overlook the fact Blue saved you from a starving Echo."

And that point means something to him. Blue saved him from a starving Echo—so should he even blame Echo? Well, Blue was starving, and she didn't attack him. However, he's spent more time with his girl than the others. Perhaps that's why she stopped the attack.

But he realizes that's not even the point Doe's trying to make. The fact is Blue protected him. Blue saved him and risked her own life to do so. She had the chance to kill and chose to attack Echo instead. Maybe his girl really does care for him. And if his girl does care than all the pain he's been feeling, she's most likely been feeling, too. If she's like the Black-Throated Monitor than she's been snappy because he hasn't spent any time with her. Maybe going in there will help both of them.

Owen presses the gate release. "If I die, I will be back to kill you."

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