Writer's blocks are the worstttt. *whines*
Now that I have that out of my system, hai y'all! Updates may be slow (esp with my comp on its last legs, it crashed 5 times this morning otl) but I want you to know I'm still here and have no plans of leaving! ^0^
Now time to fully reveal Sam's past! Prepare yourselves ... things get ugly.
Disclaimer: Totally Spies is not mine. *grumbles* Stupid.
"... I'm waiting," she heard Scam say in a voice firm and unwavering, making it clear to her that he wanted an answer to his question and would not proceed any further if he didn't get it.
Clover knew that she had to spill; she couldn't keep this from him any longer if she wanted him to pursue Sam. Tim Scam was not the kind of guy who liked to play games and on the rare occasion that he did, he only did so when he was in total control and every last card was on the table before him. It was high time that she show him her hand. Sometimes in order to move forwards, you had to go backward first.
Praying to God that after hearing this he wouldn't be scared away like so many had before, she drew in a deep breath to muster up her courage and began talking.
"She was in her first year of college when she met him ..." she revealed slowly, still hesitantly but soon letting it all out of her system while Scam listened to every word with all his attention.
Everything that she'd bore witness to 6 years in the past. How a certain Lucas "Luke" Sharpe had unleashed destruction on her best friend, her sister's once peaceful and perfect life.
She still remembered every detail of that night when Sam's path crossed with that of her biggest mistake thanks to her nagging at her to go to that big frat party that was making buzz all over campus. It was just like yesterday in her memory.
Strolling into the dorm room she shared with her two besties, Clover rolled her blue eyes when she saw Sam acting just like the textbook bookworm she was. She was sitting at her desk with a biology textbook open before her, eyes pinned on the information there, pen in hand while she neatly wrote notes in her notebook for a test that wasn't to happen for at least a month. On a Friday night no less!
"Too much studying is going to cause your brain to explode, girlfriend!" She declared as she marched right over and closed the book Sam was so keenly reading with a loud thump.
"Hey!" The redhead cried out in immediate protest. "I was reading that!"
She tried re-opening the text so Clover picked it up and held it high above her head to make sure she couldn't reach it.
"Clover!" Sam muttered through gritted teach as she jumped to her bare feet and tried to get it back while Clover playfully swatted her hands away every time. Finally, after five minutes Sam gave up. She was tired from a long day of classes and slumped back in her chair with a defeated pout grumbling that she'd just read it later then.
Clover giggled at her sour face for a minute before shaking her head to herself. As much as she loved the girl, Sam and her were polar opposites. They were a month and a half into being students at Malibu University and she'd been having a blast exploring the scenic campus and meeting loads of new people while Sam had barely left her dormitory. The only time she set foot outside was to attend her grueling classes or for volunteering purposes. In fact a "Sammie sighting" in the outside world was fast becoming as rare as seeing a four-leaf clover.
She was basically a hermit, her schedule fully loaded with work commitment after work commitment. She honestly needed to live a little! Sure college was about getting good grades and padding your resume with extra curriculars to get into the grad program of your choice but it had to be balanced with some fun to make it bearable.
If Sam kept up like this, she was soon heading for a total burn-out and she wasn't about to let that happen to her bestie.
A cheeky looks spread across her face as she remembered her big reason to interrupt Sam's oh so important study session. She had just the ticket for Sammie to finally let loose and enjoy herself a little and she was going to make sure that she didn't miss out.
"There's a big party going on toniggggggght!" She sang out cheerfully and for the first time, Sam noticed how Clover had on flawless makeup and was dressed in short red dress paired with black booties and a matching, trendy, cropped leather jacket; an outfit perfect for clubbing.
"I flirted with a guy to get us in," Clover went on grinning from ear to ear. "Everyone who is anyone is going and you have to come! The senior guys organized it and word is that they host the best parties like ever!"
"A seniors' party?" Sam objected curbing Clover's enthusiasm as she bit her lip nervously. "I-I dunno Clover."
Before she'd gone off to school her mom and especially her dad had given her the college talk which had included warning her against attending such parties because college boys sometimes could get handsy.
Besides a frat party wasn't really her scene. Why couldn't she just take the night off and spend it with some of the girls from their sorority or better yet just Clover and Alex?
But Clover seemed to have her heart set on them going to this very party as she continued trying to convince her to go.
"If you goooo," she wagered playfully twirling her hardcover text upon the tip of her index finger as though it were a basketball. "I'll give you back your book or else I may just keep it hostage foreverrrrrr!"
Just then Alex entered also dressed up for a fun night out in a teal crop top and short denim skirt paired with high heels. It only took Sam taking one look at her to know she was also going to this party Clover had been talking her ear off about.
"You're going too?" She asked only for Clover to answer for Alex as she giggled and wrapped an arm around the raven-haired girl's shoulders.
"Of course she is! Best friends forever do everything together!" She exclaimed hoping to get Sam with the program.
When the redhead just sighed in boredom and still didn't look like she wanted to join them, Clover tried a different approach.
"Aww come on Sammie! Just one Friday night, just one party ... what's the worst that can happen?"
Craning her neck back Sam groaned loud before throwing her hands up in defeat. There really wasn't ever any point trying to get Clover to budge once she'd made her mind up about having something happen.
"Okay, fine! I'll go!"
"That's more like it!" Clover pumped a fist in the air before rushing to Sam's closet and ripping open the doors soon sorting and picking through the articles of clothing to find Sam something cute to wear to the party that would make a big impression.
Just an hour later the trio was smack dab in the center of the party which was now live with raving lights, food, music, and dancing.
Alex was dancing with a guy in the center of the room while Clover was tipsily making out with another whilst sitting on his lap on a beanbag chair. Meanwhile Sam had planted herself in the quietest corner she could find while sipping on some soda in a plastic cup and waiting for her friends to tire themselves out so that they could leave.
Unbeknownst to her as she stood there doing her best at being a wallflower in her strapless, navy, sequin dress, she was being keenly watched by a set of eyes belonging to a boy part of a group of gossiping guys all his age who were all breaking their necks to keep their eyes pinned on her. On a girl they'd never seen before in person but had heard plenty about.
Rumours had alleged that she was a living, breathing Belle from the Beauty and the Beast, all brains and all beauty. They had not been wrong. With her bright emerald eyes, ivory skin, long, lean legs, lovely red hair that cascaded down to her waist, and voluptuous figure she was a perfect 10 out of 10. And the icing on the cake was that no guy had yet had a chance with her.
Well … he thought smirking to himself as he started making his way over to her confidently while being rooted on by his entourage. That ended tonight. Soon, very soon, this gorgeous babe was going to be all his.
"Come on Sammie, dance!" Clover insisted her to after spotting her just standing there not indulging herself in anything but her drink.
But Sam shook her head to dismiss that idea as she had no intention of dancing. She'd only come for a change of scenery and to keep Clover happy. She was in the process of reaching into her purse to grab her phone to occupy herself with when she heard an unfamiliar voice speaking to her. The smooth voice of a guy.
"May I have this dance?"
Sighing Sam put a fake smile on her face as she spun around to politely turn him down only to fall slack when she saw him. Her eyes couldn't help but widen in awe as her mouth parted and suddenly she couldn't bring herself to talk. Whoever he was, this guy was really, really hot.
He was tall, really tall, easily over 6 feet. He was fashionably donning a black t-shirt and tailored jeans that showed off his buff body. He had tanned skin, brown, crew cut hair, and eyes that were either vibrant blue or green. She couldn't tell for sure in the dim lighting but she could tell for sure that whatever color they were, they were stunning.
For some reason he reminded her of someone else. And while she was busy trying to figure out who, he shocked her by boldly grabbing her hand.
"H-hey! Wha-what are you doing?" She squeaked out, only now remembering she was supposed to be telling him she wasn't interested. But as she twisted her wrist to try and get it free from his grasp she was blushing violently. Something about his touch made her cheeks feel like hot pancakes and the more she tried to get them to stop flushing so much, the redder they became.
"Just showin' you how to have a good time," he responded ever so coolly as he persistently lulled her closer and closer to the dance floor. "I'm Lucas by the way," he introduced himself while giving her a charming smile that could melt a frozen mountain into a pile of hot goo. "Lucas Sharpe."
"So he's French," Sam thought as she told him her name was Samantha Simpson to not be rude. Come to think if it, she'd always had a thing for European guys. They were just so much dreamier for some reason, probably because that side of the world had such a rich cultural history that had always fascinated her.
She snapped out of her distracted thoughts when she felt him try to make her move with him and pulled herself away. It wasn't that she hated dancing or something just right now she wasn't in the mood. Her feet ached from her long hours helping construct houses for Habitat for Humanity today and they were begging to slide into a relaxing bubble bath and then under the warm covers of her bed.
But just as she got away he pulled her back to him, firmly but not forcefully enough to scare her and she found herself just staring at his handsome face as she gave her another one of those megawatt smiles he seemed to have that seemed to have a strange effect on her that she couldn't put into words.
"Then maybe we can just talk Samantha. I'm as good of a listener as I am a dancer."
And soon enough she gave him a nod deciding that talking was harmless. Besides, she thought looking Clover and Alex's way to find neither of them looking ready to leave just yet; this would keep her busy until they were.
With no further hindrance she started letting him lead her to a table off to the side never noticing how close their bodies were, their sides softly brushing against one another and leaving electric sparks to hum in the space in between while her hand became completely intertwined within his own...
"They made an instant connection and by the end of the night, Sammie was totally convinced she was in love," Clover fast-forwarded a bit while quietly noticing how there seemed to be the slightest bit of a jealous, green tinge to Tim Scam's handsome face as he sat there with his square jaw visibly tightened.
Her eyes trained on him to gauge his reaction, she continued filling in the gaps of Sam and Luke's short-loved romance.
"Soon they started spending more and more time together. It started with study dates ..." she explained implying how they had similar interests when it came to college subjects which had been another reason Sam had been so drawn to him. In fact Luke's major had been identical to Sam's; Fashion Design because his dream job was to be a fashion journalist and Sam's had been to be a couture wedding dress designer.
"And then meeting up for dinner, lunch, and then breakfast. They spent entire weekends and every single holiday together. Sam saw him every chance that she could get ..." Clover said as she remembered how quickly Sam had actually started to skip her classes to spend even more time with Luke, something that should have been a big red flag to more than just Alex.
"She was totally smitten," she continued solemnly. "It was like no one else even existed for her anymore. He seemed perfect for her and she for him."
And that was putting it lightly. It wasn't even that they had similar future professions in mind. No they seemingly had everything in common:
They were both only children.
The color purple was both of their favourite color.
Rap music was their preferred genre only next to classical.
They both loved eating sea food the most.
They both liked chess.
They both enjoyed poetry.
They both wanted to tour the world someday.
They both chose to relax with long drives and even longer walks at the beach.
The list went on and on.
"So then what went wrong?" Clover heard Scam say and turned his way again. His large hands were now folded on top of his desk, fingertips tapping together idly as he processed what he was hearing while his sea green gaze penetrated her face deeply as he quizzed her with that key question.
Within it she detected all his scepticism. She could tell he was thinking that if they had truly been as perfect for one another as she was communicating then they should not have ever fallen apart as they obviously had. And he was right to think as such but of course Scam didn't know that all of Luke's feigned perfection for Sam had been a big, fat lie.
But she should have known.
Within a millisecond face hardened into stone as she remembered where her own mistakes had truly played a part in Sam's epic ruination. If she'd just handled things better maybe she could have stopped things from going any further. If she'd just listened to Alex's mounting concerns, things could have ended much differently. But she had failed so, so miserably in doing the right thing.
Rolling back her slim shoulders as she walked through the door of DRM101 (Introduction to Drama, Theatre and Performance Studies, the only class that Sam had not taken along with them) that Clover was holding open for her, Alex smiled while taking her backpack off and holding it in her arms to give her back a rest.
They'd made it through another week of college, the weekend was here, and she was so looking forward to relishing this much needed break.
"Wanna go to the movies tonight?" She asked the second they made it down the stairs that led outside the Faculty of Music building. "The sci-fi movie I've just been dyingggggg to see has a late show that we can totally catch! How about we freshen up a bit and then go see it? My treat!"
"Um hello?! As if I'm gonna say no to any movie starring the hottie that is Raddddd!" Clover giggled with hearts in her eyes knowing just the film Alex was talking about as she'd mentioned it before which thankfully would have plenty of eye candy for her to drool over thanks to the hunky Rad Smitt playing the starring role (1).
Glad that Clover was on board with her plan, Alex was just about to ask if they should eat a snack after showering first or just live off the popcorn they'd obviously be getting to munch on with the movie when Clover said something that made her automatically frown.
"But it's just gonna be the two of us; Sammie won't be able to come. She's going out with Luk—"
"Again?" Alex cut her off with a palpable note of annoyance in her tone which left Clover blinking in surprise.
"Something wrong with that Al?" She asked one long and awkward moment of silence later.
Alex didn't answer straight away as she bit her lip almost looking like she was wondering whether or not to say that which she clearly wanted to. Finally she let out a brief sigh and fessed up. "It's just that ... it kinda feels like he's totally hogging Sammie nowadays."
Hearing that complaint Clover let out a long laugh before continuing with teasing in her happy tone. "Isn't he supposed to? I mean he's her boyfriend Alex! That's kinda what boyfriends do!"
But Alex didn't even crack a smile as she shook her head no to say that wasn't what her issue was and went on sourly. "It's get that but doesn't this whole thing sorta feel like déjà vu?"
When Clover just gave her a disconnected look, Alex was forced to tread into territory she was hoping not to have to actually go into again.
"Doesn't this remind you even a teensy weensy bit about when Sam was dating James?"
The second she said that name (2), Clover's eyes flashed with understanding. She could now see where Alex was going with this and if she were being honest, Alex did have a point.
Just like back in high school when Sam had met a guy she'd insta boyfriended because he'd appeared perfect, Sam had become Luke's girlfriend literally just 2 days after meeting him. Just as she'd given James every second of every day, she'd been giving Luke every hour in the twenty-four hours of her day. And just as though she'd gone beyond gaga over James Williams, she was completely head over heels for Lucas Sharpe.
But that was where the similarities stopped. This wasn't going to end up the way things had with James. No, Luke was a wonderful guy unlike James the opportunistic asshole who'd had an ulterior motive and nefarious purposes towards getting close to Sam and making her fall for him. James had had zero actual feelings for Sammie while Luke was clearly as deeply in love with Sam as she was with him.
After all they'd been together for over three months now and were still going strong. This relationship was definitely a real one.
"There's just something in my gut that keeps telling me that there's something wrong Clover," Alex whispered sounding genuinely afraid as she said this. "Something about Lucas just feels ..." She squirmed, her caramel skin turning pale. "Off."
"Luke is perfectly perfect," Clover stated with her nose up and in a matter-of-fact manner, deciding that she just had to end all of Alex's worries right then and there before they got to Sam's ears.
Seriously how would she feel if she found out Alex thought this way about the love of her life? Definitely not happy.
"Look I get it okay! You love Sammie! She's like a sister and you want to protect her." Placing a hand over her heart to show she was being sincere, Clover continued. "I'm just the same but I swear you don't have anythinnnnng to worry about! This one's a keeper! Everything is just fine with Sammie and Luke and that's how it's gonna stay. Trust me!"
Nodding her head only due to how sure Clover sounded, Alex relented and dropped the subject for now by opting to talk about their movie outing instead.
But deep inside her despite this conversation, her instinct kept telling her over and over that Clover ... was wrong.
Open shame coloured her face as she kept replaying the past and the memory of what had come just one week after that failed heart-to-heart with Alex.
She'd just returned from the mall with Sam who'd picked out a new dress to wear on her date and had been affectionately looking over her own purchases while Sam took a shower to get ready to go out with her boyfriend when her phone had suddenly lit up with a text.
A text from none other than Alex.
A text that had been the beginning of the end.
NEED 2 TALK. DON'T TELL SAM. LIBRARY.
Groaning to herself, Clover wondered to herself if Alex was going to go on another rant about Lucas, an annoying habit that she'd developed out of the blue for some reason. Sadly their little talk had done nothing to soothe Alex's concerns and ever since she'd been making jabs and comments here and there every day to express her disapproval and suspicion of him.
In fact it was starting to get super hard to cover for her in front of Sam who by now had started to notice how Alex didn't really seem to like her amazing boyfriend. It was putting a strain on their friendship, creating a distance between the two girls that had been joined at the hip since childhood so she just wished Alex would chill out and stop being so freaking paranoid.
Hearing the ding of another message again from the girl in question, she reluctantly dragged herself off the comfy dorm couch and trudged her way down to the library.
On the other side of the campus with her eyebrows in a knot, Alex was pacing restlessly back and forth in front of the library's closed doors with a storm brewing inside her. The knowledge that she now had tormenting her as she wrestled with the question of how on earth she was going to tell this to Sam who was really going to be heartbroken when she found out because she thought the moon and the stars of Luke when frankly? He was nothing more than a steaming pile of trash.
But then again she couldn't just sit on this. Her expression grew more grave. Sam had to know before it was too late. She'd never forgive herself if her keeping her mouth shut for too long ultimately ended up hurting her.
As she waited for Clover to show up she thought back to just how she'd stumbled upon this bombshell. After speaking with Clover seven days, without telling another soul she had taken it upon herself to do some digging into Lucas Sharpe. Because she hadn't been able to just let this go. Not only was Sam with him from AM to freaking PM to AM again, but he was bad influence and she was sucking that up like a sponge.
Her, the forever most studious girl she'd known not caring about her studies so much anymore had been just the beginning (she still remembered how she'd gotten a set of C's on her report card for the first time in her life and despite promising to study more for the rest of the year to pull her grades back up had, the very same day, went off to see Luke again in the time she'd allotted for a cram session and returned at 3:30 am only to pass out onto her bed with her schoolbooks untouched), Sam was quickly changing into a another girl entirely. A girl she truthfully didn't even recognize.
Just like she'd been so desperate to get Seth's attention back when she'd been at Bev High that she'd turned herself Goth for him (3), Sam was altering her appearance. However Sam's physical transformation was a lot more troubling then her wearing black all the time.
Sam's makeup was heavier and much more "look at me", her hair was always in a high bun so it didn't cover any part of her body front or back. Her clothes were skin tight enough that they left nothing to the imagination of what was under them and short, so short that they barely reached past thong level.
Luke seemed to have told Sam that he liked her body and she was making a point of showing it to him more and more to keep him happy. And the few times that she'd been in the same room that she'd been in with Luke, her amber eyes had been unable to not see what was right before her. How he looked at Sam like a starving animal did at a piece of meat.
His eyes never left her cleavage, his mouth always breathing down her neck, his hand forever petting and squeezing her behind while he had her trapped in the confines of his lap where he made sure she always sat.
So out of fear and worry she'd started covertly following him around. And then one day while he'd been leaving gym class with his jock friends, she'd heard a conversation about Sam that had terrified her to depths of her soul. One that left no doubts whatsoever what Luke's intentions towards Sam were. What it was that he was really after.
From the corner of her eye she saw the blonde approaching and raced over to her, immediately telling her that which she couldn't keep to herself any longer.
He didn't love Sam, Alex had warned her. He only loved her body. Of course when she'd heard that disgusting accusation that Luke, Sam's now longest lasting boyfriend was only interested in sex and had apparently made some bet with a high payout that he would win if he managed to be Sam's "first", she'd been shocked and refused to believe it.
"What?!" She'd gasped while snorting and scoffing. "Who Luke? Come on Alex, you have to have misheard. There's just nooooo way!"
Even while Alex had sworn to her that she'd heard the words as plain as day, she hadn't trusted her and had actually given her an earful for thinking something so gross about the guy Sam loved so very much. She'd then irrationally ordered Alex to never say this to Sam instead of taking her seriously which had left Alex with no option but to confront Sam all by herself.
What had resulted was an argument so heated that it had permanently severed Alex and Sam's friendship. The second Alex mentioned what she'd eavesdropped on Luke to Sam, Sam had lost it. She'd snarled and shouted and asked Alex who the hell she thought she was spying on Luke like that?
When Alex had countered by saying she was her friend and was just being that by doing this Sam had argued that friends didn't betray friends like this, choosing to focus all her attention on Alex going behind her back to investigate her boyfriend instead of the much more important results of her findings.
All sorts of painful insults had then been tossed Alex's way. That she was loser, that she needed to get a life, get a boyfriend of her own instead of tag after hers. And then the worst one. That she'd always known that Alex was jealous of Luke and her relationship but not so much that she'd stoop this low to make up such a filthy lie just to try and break them up.
That had been the final straw for Alex. She'd burst into tears and yelled out that Sam was being an idiot and would one day pay for her own blindness but when that day came, she wouldn't be there to see it because she was no longer Sam's friend.
She'd then cleared out all her essential belongings from their dorm, messily stuffed them all into a suitcase and run out leaving Sam behind while she herself had uselessly done nothing besides calling out Alex's name a few times to try and make her come back and giving up soon after when she didn't.
She supposed she'd thought back then that when Alex calmed down she'd be back, that Sam and her friendship would recover when the two started to miss each other.
But Alex never came back. She instead went home to visit family and shifted into her step-father's place with her mom because they had the room to house her until she figured out where she wanted to attend classes now that she'd quit Malibu.
As bad as that was, unfortunately Clover knew now that her ultimate blunder hadn't even been allowing Sam to stupidly push Alex away in the harsh and unfair way that she had and standing by and supporting her in her decision when she should have seen that it was Sam and not Alex who'd been in the wrong.
No there was another one she'd made, an even more severe error that she beat herself up for every day since to this day. She gulped dryly as she attempted to choke back her sobs only to fail because she knew that was it, that was the thing that had been the catalyst to Sam losing not just Alex but everything she'd held near and dear.
Tears now prickling the edges of her blue eyes, she remembered being in her dorm that night just two nights after Alex's exit when Sam had come in looking anxious and badly needing some advice on a rather delicate subject.
"So you two still haven't made up?" Clover asked although the answer to that question was already on Sam's unhappy and depressed looking face as she sat down on a nearby chair and sulked away.
News of her and Alex's spectacular falling out had made it all the way to Luke who had chivalrously decided to hold himself responsible for it. He believed he was the one who had come between Sam and her BFF, so much so that he was punishing himself by avoiding Sam like the plague. Last she'd heard, he'd said that he just didn't deserve her after causing something this awful to happen to her.
And judging by Sam's mood right now it seemed after 48 hours of her trying to tell him he was wrong, that he had no reason to feel guilty about this, he still thought otherwise.
"Did you tell him what she said to you about him?" Clover wondered aloud knowing if Luke knew that then he probably wouldn't be seeing Sam losing Alex as such a huge loss. "And that you decided to cut her out of your life because of it?"
If anything, that would at least prove to Luke that her loyalties were with him and not Alexandra Vasquez.
"I did," Sam quietly mumbled before biting her lip hard and sighing out a but.
"But what?"
"Luke fears that things will just NEVER be the same between us again," Sam explained while pouting like a sad, lost, and kicked puppy. "This whole thing has just caused waaaaaaay too much drama and now he—"
"SO HE'S BREAKING UP WITH YOU?!" Clover gasped out in concern, immediately moving to comfort Sam if that was the case. She'd already lost a bestie in this ordeal, she didn't need to lose her beloved boyfriend too.
But then Sam said something that told her the fallout to this was actually much, much worse than just a standard break-up.
"He's leaving Clover. Luke's decided ... to transfer out."
"WHAT?!" Clover shrieked not having seen something this drastic coming where Sam and Luke would literally be going from lovers to strangers again.
By this point, Sam was actually crying. Salty tears of pure anguish and sorrow trailed down her cheeks as she remembered every word he'd said when she'd managed to grab his wrist and forced him to speak to her.
"He said that he knows he has to let me go but if he stays here then it won't be possible. His feelings for me are just ... too strong. It's just too hard. He can't see me everyday and not want to be my boyfriend again."
Covering her face with her hands Sam kept sobbing as she dared not think of Luke actually going through with this and leaving her behind. He said he'd be gone by the end of the week, that was just a few days from now! What would she do without him? She loved him so damn much that she couldn't even fathom actually losing him. She'd do anything to make him stay! To take her back! Anything!
"Oh my God, I'm so sorry sweetie," Clover whispered softly, rubbing Sam's back in small circles to try and soothe away her despair.
"I wish I could help you think of some way to stop him," she said knowing that if she could, she would. But with Luke already having made up his mind there was nothing more that could be done when Sam's very quiet and very shy sounding voice drew her attention.
"Well ... there is one thing," the redhead suddenly said as she wiped away her tears and remembered that she still had one ray of hope that had not been snuffed out yet. She could still fix this. Luke had told her just how to, all she had to do was do it.
Feeling Clover's curious gaze glued to her, she took a deep breath into her lungs before telling her what she had to do to win her Luke back once and for all.
"He said that if I could give him a sign to show him that I really, truly loved him even after all of this then he wouldn't have to go. That we can still be together if I can take away his doubts and show him that I want him now even more than I did before."
"Okay..." Clover said slowly, not really getting where Sam was going with this. She'd already poured her heart and soul out to Lucas, what else could she do to convince him without question that he was the only one for her? She couldn't think of anything else.
Then all at once her eyes flew wide as she finally caught Sam's drift. Was she thinking of taking their relationship to the next level? Of getting intimate with Lucas.
The startled look on her face must have been a dead giveaway of her thoughts as Sam started to very awkwardly doodle into the armrest of her chair and look at the floor while blushing like a ripe tomato.
And she got her confirmation right then that yes, having sex with Luke was just what Sam was planning.
"Well um ... I mean you've never actually ... done that before ... right?" Clover uncomfortably managed to get out. Clearing her throat she tried to be a little more comprehensible. "Like Lucas is totally gonna be your first time … right?"
When Sam meekly nodded her head and blushed even more, Clover wasn't sure how to feel about this because this ... was huge.
She knew Sam, and she knew she had always said that she wanted to be traditional and wait till marriage to have sex because there was something just so beautiful and pure about sharing that level of closeness with just your husband instead of just any guy. This completely went against those lifelong ideals.
Also her family would totally flip out if they found out as Sam's relatives were extremely conservative and would definitely frown on her doing this. Especially Sam's dad Shawn.
As if she could tell just what she was thinking, Sam tried justifying why she wanted to do this. Why she thought it was time.
"I love him Clover," she breathed out heavily as though it was hard for her to contain just how much she did inside herself. "I love him so much. I ... I can't imagine my life without him. I ... think he's the one."
As Clover's eyes went even wider realizing at last what Sam was saying, she smiled now to say that yes that was it. By calling him the one, she was implying that she could see herself marrying Lucas some day.
"He's the one I want to be with now and forever..." She said then, so gently and with so much tenderness like she was standing before Luke at a wedding altar and saying this to him instead of her.
Hearing all the conviction, the absence of any doubt both in her voice and on her face Clover couldn't bring herself to question if Sam was making a mistake. It was clear that in this world full of billions, Sammie had located her soul mate.
That was all that mattered didn't it? That she was sure he was the one she loved and would forever love over any other guy? And with feelings that strong and invincible, making love was only the next natural step.
Clover touched Sam's shoulder and gave it a friendly squeeze as she smiled at her encouragingly, giving her the approval she wanted from her just like a good friend would.
"Then do what your heart is telling you Sammie."
Sam's face burst into a happy grin. Reaching over, she thanked her profusely with a big hug before she ran off to show Lucas Sharpe just how much she loved him.
Sealing her eyes with bitterness and self-loathing Clover could slap herself right now across her face for giving Sam such trash counsel. Any man that made you go against you beliefs, emotionally blackmailed you into spreading your legs for him (that was exactly what that had been as she'd found out soon enough. Lucas hadn't given a single damn about Alex, he'd only seen her leaving as the perfect opportunity to go in for the kill with a lovelorn and vulnerable Sam all the while feeling like a king at her foolishly having chosen him over her) when you weren't ready was a user and an asshole.
She should have shook sense into Sam, figured out that she wasn't using her head right now, and stopped her from giving Lucas something so irreplaceable and precious. Something that he'd never once deserved as he proved just some time later.
While Sam's grades fell into a deeper pitfall swiftly turning from a couple of C's to D's and F's especially now that she was constantly putting out for her horny boyfriend who wanted to have sex with her 24/7, she also soon failed in something other than her classes. Something that had even farther reaching consequences than any of them could have ever imagined.
Hearing Scam utter her name to prompt her forward and finish scribbling in the final few pages of the story of Sam's life that he didn't know about still, she began unravelling for him exactly when Sam's nightmare had truly begun. Exactly when she'd started to transform from a happy, optimistic girl with hopes and dreams into the bitter, jaded, broken woman she was today that didn't trust anyone including herself anymore.
The first thought she'd had when she'd walked in to find a very panicked looking Sam looking as lifeless as a ghost sitting on her bed was that her parents had somehow gotten a hold of the report cards she'd been hiding and called to give her a verbal lashing about them.
Actually knowing Sam's dad, he was probably on his way here to lecture her in person which would explain why Sam looked so much like a little girl about to cry.
But the actual reason why Sam appeared so undone right now, left her almost falling faint.
"My uh-my ..." Sam had bumbled, tripping over every syllable as she spoke shakily. "Clover I ... I didn't get my period this month."
Clover did her best not to freak out at that admission as she opened her mouth to tell Sam that it was probably okay; every girl no matter how regular missed a cycle here and there due to things like stress and finals were almost upon them.
But Sam's next confession made her fall silent. Completely and utterly silent.
"And I've been feeling a little bit nauseous as of late too ..."
For the first time Clover noticed that Sam was holding something in her hand so tightly that her entire fist was white. Now that her eyes zeroed in on it, she realized that it was the result of a home pregnancy test. And the color of the indicator strip was showing a clear positive.
"Oh god ..." Clover thought, feeling her heartbeat start to hammer in her throat. This could not be happening right? Sam wasn't actually pregnant ... right?"
"Sammie ..." She bit her lip tensely before asking her the invasive but necessary question. "While you were with Lucas ... you were using protection right?"
"I think so..." Sam whispered before bowing her head in a guilty manner and staring at her bare kneecap while picking at the denim of her mini-skirt thinking over how Lucas had wanted more intimacy with her and had about two weeks ago asked to not wear a condom anymore; something she'd convinced herself was okay as long as she took birth control pills. Although sometimes she had difficulty remembering when she'd taken those and if she needed to take more or not.
"At least ... at first."
Clover's eyes tripled in size as her jaw dropped incredulously. What had she been thinking?! Sam was waaayyyy too smart to end up in this very easily preventable situation! In fact she was the last girl on the planet she'd ever think could be so reckless!
But then again Sam was totally lost in love right now in a way she never had before. And in that dazed state, she'd made a misstep that had led to this life-changing situation.
Crossing her arms over her chest, Clover stared hard at her best friend before asking her the very difficult question of whether or not she would be even keeping this baby or—
"... An abortion?" Sam barely whispered out looking scared to death at the thought. Her arms moved and wrapped protectively around her belly as she cradled herself knowing that had always been against her principles.
To kill off an innocent baby was just ... wrong. And this one, this one was the symbol of her and Lucas' passionate love. How could she destroy it?
Reading her intentions for the child within her with her body language, Clover understood where she was coming from and expressed the deepest sympathy for her before reminding her that she was barely an adult and not anywhere near ready to be a mother.
What about her dreams of an illustrious career? Would she be able to achieve them while raising a kid? Even if Luke and her were committed to one another, a baby would change things between them. They would be parents! Parents at age 19 and 21!
And what of her own parents? How would they feel when they inevitably found out about this? They didn't even know she was dating a guy in college, had a serious boyfriend, let alone that she was pregnant with his baby!
As difficult as it was, she had to consider all those things also and not just how she felt about Luke.
Seeing the effects of the mental tug-of-war Sam was going through now starting to show on her bewildered face, Clover decided to take Sam down to the campus medical office first.
Before anything else they had to find out if this was for real. Pregnancy kits like this often fluked and it was very possible that she wasn't even pregnant and there was no colossal choice for her to make.
Yet just an hour later both Sam and her got the undeniable confirmation that Sam was indeed carrying Lucas' baby in her womb and yes, this was actually happening.
While Sam collapsed onto a chair in the nurse's office and cried out asking what was she going to do, Clover informed of the very first thing that she definitely had to do.
"Sammie ... you have to tell Luke," she urged knowing his reaction to the news was going to be instrumental in deciding what happened next.
If he was willing to be a dad to Sam's baby then as challenging as this new path that her life would now be going down would be, she'd still get through it with him by her side. Sure it wouldn't be exactly how she'd always planned it happening but with Luke's support she could still get her happy ending complete with a rewarding career and wholesome family life.
All Lucas had to do was be there for her and it'd all be okay.
"So how did he take the news?" Tim questioned curiously already having a feeling that this was when everything had gone to all hell for Sam, an intuition that flared higher with how Clover's body began to actually shudder just then as if telling him without words that this Lucas guy had let Sam down badly when she'd needed him most.
But how badly?
"He took it well. Too well to be honest," Clover opened her mouth again a moment later when she'd composed herself a little.
"He said he was so happy they were having a baby. He swore to her that she would not be dealing with this alone and he'd be with her every step of the way. When Sammie left, he made sure she felt like she had nothing to worry about. In fact, he even sat down with her and decided on the date when he'd be going with her to break the news to her mum and dad."
Scam's face screwed up in sheer confusion at what he was hearing now. This ... didn't sound at all like a guy who had no interest in being a dad to Sam's baby. Actually he seemed like he was very responsible towards his unborn child and its mother. Well, besides for knocking her up by being an irresponsible idiot in the first place.
For just a minute the thought of another man's hands being all over Sam's naked body, of him being on top and inside of her set him ablaze, ridiculously enough seeing he knew full well it had happened at least once before. Sam did have a daughter after all.
But he maintained his calm exterior because as hard as this was to sit through, it was a necessary evil and he himself had asked for it.
Putting his mind back on his latest conundrum of Lucas' unexpected cooperation in Sam's accidental pregnancy, he couldn't help but ask himself why he was absent from Josie and Sam's lives? If he was so excited and willing to be there for them then, then where was he now? Based on this, it didn't make any sense for him to be gone entirely.
Had Sam decided to part ways with him because something else had happened further into her pregnancy? Maybe as much as she loved him, them being parents together just didn't work out. Heck married couples sometimes split apart when their first child came into the picture because they just weren't cut out for it, and Sam and Luke had just been boyfriend and girlfriend.
But what Clover told him next left him feeling hit with a whirlwind of shock, disbelief, and revulsion all at once and the realization that Lucas Sharpe had not been nearly as innocent as he'd been mistakenly thinking and incorrectly giving him the benefit of the doubt of being.
"But when the Saturday they'd agreed on to make the trip arrived just three days later… Luke was nowhere to be found. His dorm room was empty, no one had seen in him in his classes, and he wasn't answering any of the hundreds of calls, voicemails, and texts that Sam left him."
"... Please tell me that the man hadn't been that much of a coward, that much of a bastard to abandon her so cruelly in her time of need," Scam thought just then, his teeth clenching and hands curling into fists atop his desk as an overwhelming need to do something that he hadn't done in ages took over him.
And that was the maddening desire to hurt someone, namely Lucas. Torture him until he screamed, until he bled to make him pay for the hideous wrong he'd done to Sam.
Regardless of him being a super villain once and a doer of nearly every crime that the law recognized, he knew if he ever had a baby that needed him, his baby that needed him, he'd never be able to turn a blind eye and walk away from his own flesh and blood.
There simply was no way to validate it, he just couldn't understand what kind of a person did something that fucking heartless? That cold-blooded? And that too to someone they said they loved?
Clover stopped talking for just a second to let her eyes wash over Scam's increasingly wrathful face and was able to tell that he was mentally putting the pieces of the puzzle together just as she had when Sam had frantically told her that she wasn't being able to get in touch with her boyfriend despite all her endless attempts.
That he was hiding from her on purpose and didn't want to be found. That he was ignoring her messages despite receiving them all. That he had bailed on her. Something that Sam hadn't noticed or was desperate to pretend she hadn't.
For even when she was informed months after that Lucas had actually left the college entirely along with the state and had started attending Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia had she not understood that she'd been duped. A nearly two months pregnant Sam had stubbornly kept her blindfold on against his transparent betrayal and went all the way there just to see him again.
What she'd hoped to find was a miserable Romeo Lucas who'd somehow been compelled to leave her behind without his will and had a heartfelt explanation for her but what she'd found in his place was a more than happy Lucas who had a brand new school, a brand new major, and a brand new girlfriend to go with it.
"When she finally cornered him... " Clover proceeded, recounting what Sam had said to her all those years ago while crying in her arms in the form of a shaking, crying, heartbroken mess. A tale of treachery so sickening she'd never gotten over it and never would.
"She naively apologized thinking she'd done something wrong and pleaded with him to forgive her. But instead of dumping his new girl and returning to her where he belonged, Luke told Sam that he couldn't go with her.
"Babe, I'm sorry but I'm too young to be a dad yet," He sighed, having the gall to try and get pity out of her for his cowardice.
"I have plans for my life. Big plans. You know that I want to be a fashion journalist. I want a life of success, fame, adventure. Having a baby now would ... I hate to say it, but it'd just get in the way. One day, far into the future I might want to settle down, get married, and have kids but I'm definitely not ready for all that now and honestly neither are you. If I were you I'd ... get an abortion."
"What's gotten into you Luke?!" Sam had shouted in disbelief. Was this the same man she'd known all this time, loved, and given herself to in every way that she knew how to? To her eyes he seemed a stranger in this moment.
Clutching his shirt she'd tried to implore him to listen to himself, that this wasn't him speaking to her right now because it couldn't be. Something, someone had to be controlling him! His mouth was saying someone else's words and not his own!
"Come on, let's go! Let's go see my parents! Your parents! We have to tell them that we're having a baby! That we're gonna be getting married!" She begged him to keep his promise to her that he'd made to her the last time they'd spoken face to face.
That could not have been a lie! He couldn't be ditching her! No, her Luke would never in a million years do that! He loved her far too much, she knew he did!
But he'd frowned and tugged himself free of her clutches before rudely telling her off by saying that he was never actually going to meet her parents, nor had he ever meant it when he'd said that he would marry her because doing that wouldn't be fair to him.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SAYING?!" Sam had wailed now with her brain exploding from confusion. Why would his becoming her husband, choosing to spend his life with her, with the woman he loved so dearly not be fair to HIM? What was the meaning of that cryptic statement?!
But the meaning became evident when Lucas looked her right in the eye and said something that tore her heart into a billion tiny shreds inside the cavern of her chest.
"Because I don't love you Sam. Honestly … I never really did."
"Then ... w-why?" Sam was barely able to breathe out through her laboured breaths and unattractive tears that were making a spectacular wreck of the mascara she'd carefully put on for the first time in forever just to pretty herself up for this much anticipated meeting with him.
"Wh-whyy did you t-tell me that you did? Why d-did you do any of this?"
Now having gotten what he'd wanted out of her and being ready to wipe his feet off on her like an used rug and leave out the door, Lucas finally confessed the ugly truth.
"In my fraternity, there was a uh ... a bet we made. We had a sort of list of the most beautiful freshmen girls who we speculated hadn't lost their virginities yet. Well ... you were on top of that list so—"
A gasp leaving her, Sam's hand connected with Luke's cheek in a slap with such a thundering force that sounded like a lightning bolt had hit somewhere close by. Having heard more than enough to finally bring her back to her senses she only stayed in his room long enough to rip the promise ring he'd given her just before the first time they'd slept together off her finger. And then she ran out and kept running and running as far as she could get from Lucas Sharpe.
Tears taking the form of salty waterfalls gushed out of her eyes at the soul-shattering knowledge that the man she'd loved with every fibre of her being had never loved her back. To him all she'd ever been was a sex object, a toy to play with, and at most an ego boost.
Crushed, she felt a tornado of emotions rip her inside her out.
Hate.
Betrayal.
Worthlessness.
Disgust.
But two things most of all. A feeling of all-encompassing rage and downright stupidity at no one but herself because she had no one else to blame for this. Her life had turned into the cliché plot of a bad young adult movie due to solely her lack of thought.
Alex had been right Sam knew, seeing the light at long last in her darkest moment.
Collapsing onto her knees the second she reached her car, she hid her face with her hands and cried herself a belated ocean of regret and shame right there on the gravel of the parking lot.
Alex had been right all along.
"She slipped into the deepest depression, " Clover's voice trembled with sorrow as she remembered the critical aftermath of Luke's betrayal.
Sam wouldn't eat, she wouldn't speak, she wouldn't even sleep. She'd spend whole days just laying in bed and staring up at the ceiling, her eyes vacant of anything but tears. For a long time it seemed like her tears would never stop falling.
But little by little she'd gotten her back up on her feet by promising her that unlike her cheating dickhead of a boyfriend, she'd never ditch her and that as rough as things were right now they would get her life back on track. Then with the reminder that she had an innocent little life growing inside of her that she needed to care for, she'd persuaded Sam to start taking care of herself again.
"In the face of everything she was going through, Sammie did her best to stay strong. Even though she wasn't in the best place mentally, she apologized to her professors for her poor attendance in the past and asked if there was any way of redeeming her failed credits. Once she'd convinced them to give her another chance, she spent all hours at the library, pulled all-nighter after all-nighter to try and catch up. She worked so hard despite gossipy whispers following her everywhere."
"She was so brave," Scam thought as Clover described Sam's valiant attempts to rise above the chaos she'd been through. To say he found that admirable was a massive understatement for most people would crumble and fall after such an episode instead of get back up and push themselves to keep going.
But then … when had Sam lost that determination? Because the Samantha he'd encountered now five years after the Samantha that Clover was describing him didn't have that invincible willpower anymore.
She'd given up and settled for the lemons that life had handed her which had to mean that something else, something even worse than this had happened to her which had ultimately broken her beyond repair.
As much as he dare not think of what that could have been, he knew it was far too late to back out now. Sam's full story was still pending. The last page, the final paragraph. And bracing himself the best that he could, he asked to know what was written on it.
"What stopped her from turning her life around Clover… What got in the way?"
This time Clover's face contorted into one so hateful that it almost seemed like he wasn't even looking at the blonde he knew anymore. With no control over the contempt in her tone she spit out the final secret.
"... A certain someone at our college decided that Sam's misfortune would make a nice feature for the front cover of the school newspaper."
Mandy Luxe had always been a fierce rival and a total bitch but what she'd done to Sam was so beyond just being a shit person. It was cruel, it was sadistic, it was inhumane, and it was unforgivable.
By the time that scandalous issue of "The Malibu Times" had made the rounds around campus, not a person was left in that entire college who didn't know that Sam was pregnant and exactly how she'd wound up that way.
All Mandy had gotten for it was a slap on the wrist by the dean for putting a student's private matter out in public like that. Her punishment was decided to be some hours of community service, suspension from writing for the paper, and the requirement of writing a letter of apology to Sam.
One that Sam hadn't even received because the fallout of that newsletter had left her unable to look anyone in the eye anymore. With no other choice she'd fled from the college to home and to what she'd been hoping would be the sanctuary of her parents' love, forgiveness, and much-needed understanding.
And it was here that Sam's life derailed once and for all after she received the final fatal blow, the dagger in her heart from none other than her own father who'd cast her away like a rotten apple upon learning that she had returned home carrying a bastard child inside her that she refused to abort at any cost.
"THEN YOU CAN GET OUT!" Shawn had screamed at her, practically dragging her to the front door of the family mansion while ignoring his wife's screams behind him trying to get him to please re-think this, saying that yes Sam had made an awful err in judgement but throwing her out in the street to fend for herself was not the punishment she deserved especially while she was in this fragile condition.
But he hadn't been able to hear her or his once cherished daughter's heartbroken cries, the humiliation and loss of repute that he'd faced in society that day being too much for the high class, orthodox, Christian father to bear.
"Whatever else that was left of Sam fell apart that day ... " Clover whispered now with her tears falling freely, unable to be restrained any longer as unforgotten pain and old wounds ripped open for her with brutal force.
"Sammie lost her family, her home, her hopes and dreams, everything … And it's all because of me. It's all my fault!"
Her legs unable to support her for any more time, Clover slowly slid to the floor of the office. The act of shedding the heavy burden of remorse she'd held onto her shoulders for half a decade taking everything out of her left her in a fit of uncontrollable sobs.
And just across from her with his jaw on that same ground that she was huddled upon and eyes stuck wide in horror, with lungs not even breathing anymore was Tim Scam who was at an absolute loss for words after finally knowing everything that Samantha Simpson had endured in his 5-year-long absence.
(1) Reference to Season 6, Episode 8: "Celebrity Swipe!". One of the things I love most about this show is its real world parody characters and this one is pure gold lol. Rad Smitt is TS' version of actor Brad Pitt.
(2) The infamous James from Season 1, Episode 18: "Evil Boyfriend". I drew heavily from this episode as I'm sure you guys can tell. Sam's behaviour in that episode really inspired her actions in this flashback chapter.
(3) Alex turns Goth in Season 3, Episode 17: "Creepy Crawly Much?" to impress a guy named Seth.
...
Longest chapter I have done in ages (I'm sorry but I wanted to finish up the back-story! x_x) I'm excited to hear your reactions to it though!
How Sam was cheated by Josie's dad, how she ended up losing Alex, the part Mandy played, and most of all what you think is coming next!
Will this change Scam's decision to no longer pursue Sam or strengthen it?
Review if you please? :D
Love,
Cresenta L