Finally, the fourth installment of Ask Me No Questions! Before I start, I'd like to thank Godess of Idun for FINALLY finishing Dimention17, and for defrosting my brain block.

You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because you think I own the X-Men.

4

Superhero No More

The sun sank slowly over the New York skyline, turning the sky a fantastic shade of blue. Pink and purple clouds bruised the horizon as a shadowy figure sat curled on the roof of an apartment building.

Kurt curled into a ball, not unlike a cat, and tried despratley not to cry. As far as he could tell, everybody hated him, he had nowhere to go, and about enough money for a packet of pretzels. Running his hands through his hair, he pretended he was back home in Germany, lying on the bed in his caravan. Footsteps would pass by outside, the smell of cotton candy would drift through the cracked window, voices would yell. His Mamá would be laughing and Andréi would be telling jokes to a group of small children, and his adopted siblings, Stephan and Jimaine would be curled next to him. Just the three of us, Kurt thought suddenly with a pang of homesickness. Die tuefel bandïger. The Demon Tamers. "Look at them," Stephan would be saying, "They all want to run away and join the circus."

"Look at me," Jimaine would retort quietly, "I want to run away and join real life."

"Ich werde nie Sie vergessen," Kurt murmered to himself. I'll never forget you.

A tear traced a path down his face.

He stood up slowly. I'm lying to myself, he thought. I've been lying to myself since day one. I convinced myself that I was somehow normal, tried to forget about everything… and now life's come back and bitten me in the butt. His hand hovered over the chunky sportswatch on his wrist and for a moment he was unsure, but then he unstrapped the holowatch. He held it limply in his hand, the contact preventing the hologram to fizzle out, then drew back and threw the machine as far as he could.

The watch flew out over the sea of people and cars hurrying along below, and Kurt thought, I could teleport out there now… grab it before it hits the ground… keep the deception going… but then he shook his head and turned away. He wrapped his tail protectively around his leg, and walked away, as the watch broke into a million pieces when it hit the ground.

Still walking, he pulled the hood of his sweater up over his face. "Goodbye, X-Men," he whispered. "I hope you can understand."

And then he jumped.

§

"We're here at the exact site where three separate groups have reported seeing a demon. How would you describe this monster, ma'am?"

"It was seven foot, easily, with blue skin and glowing yellow eyes, and a tail with a pointed tip! It had three claws on each of its hands, and walked like a monkey man!"

"How about you, sir?"

"Seven foot? Eight foot, more like it! It had long, tangled hair, and blue fur all over its body, and it walked on all fours like a cat! Its tail was five, six feet long alone, and its eyes glowed red!"

"Not only adults were terrorised when the monster appeared in the middle of the street in the middle of a cloud of red gas. This young lady here is only four years old. I can't imagine how horrible it must be for this little girl."

"He wasn't a monster. He was just a boy. He smiled at me and then disappeared again, but he didn't want to scare anybody."

"Um… well… she's obviously in shock! I'm Katie Leonard, and you are up to date."

Peter Parker hopped across his basement, one foot in his Spiderman suit, struggling to put the lycra tights on. "Superman never had this trouble," he mumbled, "neither did Batman, or J'on J'ons, or Hawkgirl, or Wonderwoman." He crashed into his computer desk. "And there goes the computer, what a wonderful life being a superhero is."

"Peter?" a voice called from upstairs, "Are you alright?"

"Yes, Aunt May, don't come in, Aunt May! I'm going out to the Bugle, 'kay?"

"Peter, you know I don't like you going out late after what happened to Gwen's father."

"The Bugle, Aunt May, think of the Bugle!"

"Okay, fine. But be back before ten!"

Peter pulled a sweater on over his spiderman costume. "Yeah, thanks, bye!" He crashed out the basement door and ran into an alley around the corner.

If anyone were to follow him, they would have found nothing but a sweater and a note saying, Parker, P. Found it on the way to save the world. From, your friendly neighbourhood Spiderman.

§

Kurt landed on the side of the empire state building. "Ooh ooh ah ah," he said dryly. "Roar, I'm King Kong."

To add to the effect, a helicopter swerved around the side of the building, a spotlight shining into his eyes. "Wonderbar," Kurt called out, "all set for the next King Kong cover!"

"Don't move," a tinny voice said over a loudspeaker, "we have you surrounded."

"And just what makes you think I speak English, herr policeman?" Kurt called, taking a dive off the side of the building and disappearing.

§

God, what is with this guy? Can't he just stay still for five seconds? Peter – Spiderman, rather – swung back to the top of the empire state building, and peered out at the night. Across the city on top of yet another apartment block he could just make out a puff of smoke. "Gotcha," he muttered, and jumped out over the traffic.

§

Kurt shook his head yet again. "Ha!" he yelled. "Once again die tuefel outwits the authorities!"

"Not so fast, man," a voice said in his ear, sweeping him off the rooftop and into the air. "'Die – ah, die toothill may outwit the authorities, but he can never outwit Spiderman."

Kurt yelled and kicked Spiderman right where he knew he'd never want to be kicked, and flipped over in mid air when Spiderman dropped him. "Later, Spidey," he called. "A master superhero can never outthink a former master superhero." And he teleported again – right back to the place he never wanted to go.

Bayville, West Chester, New York State

Kurt cracked his knuckles before hammering on the door of the boarding house. "What," Lance said upon opening the door. Then, "Oh crap," and "please don't kill me, she's the one who started it!"

"Was?" Kurt said, confused.

"She likes you better than me, all I wanted was to see her happy, please don't hurt me for it, I'll take her back, just don't hurt me!"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Dumping…Kitty…" Lance whispered.

"Oh, that." Kurt shook his head. "That's nothing. She's – she's over it. Over you." He couldn't help but find comfort in the look of sadness upon Lance's face. He pushed past Lance and into the house. "Is there a spare room anywhere?"

"Huh?"

"I'm… I'm quitting the X-Men. I want to join the Brotherhood."

GASP! Dun dun dun! What will happen now? Will the rest of the Brotherhood accept Kurt? Will the X-Men try to get him back? Not forgetting the teenagers in the café, Spiderman, and the recovered memory… find out! Next time on Ask Me No Questions!

PS. Sorry if Lance was a little out of character, I just thought it would be funny if he thought Kurt was out to get him for making Kitty sad.