"Well, between that and the long council meeting, my brain is mush" Jacob announced.
"I am hoping that you are able to have one more conversation, Jake" Sam's tone was casual yet uneasy.
Paul and Rachel looked between the two men. Obviously, both trying to get clues as to what the conversation was going to be. I saw the defining lines in the people gathered around the huge table. The people looking at conversations from the council perspective was Jacob, Leah and Rachel. Paul, Sam and I looked at issues from the pack perspective. This was the core group that made all of the decisions. Partly, I was worried that I was a part of this core group. My perspective was not one that was raised here. Again, my head felt out of place, even though my heart was secure in my love for Sam.
"Did Billy take every imprint on the lake?" Sam asked.
Chapter 24: Declared Truth
As Always Happy Reading
Jacob seemed to freeze as he processed Sam's words. The entire room seemed to understand exactly what Sam was asking. Yet, no one broke the silence to answer.
Sam knew everything I knew. I waited with bated breath for the answers around the table. If it was not just me, then who else?
"Sam, I told him to stop" Jacob sighed.
I could feel the anger surging up the bond between Sam and I. This was the last thing Sam wanted to hear.
"Who did he do it to?" Sam asked the table.
"I think the better question is, who didn't he do it to?" Rachel spat.
Paul wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into his chest. Rachel shook with anger.
"Does anyone know why he does it?" Paul asked. I could see in his eyes that he wanted to ask this question for a while.
The table fell silent. I could feel the anger running over Sam. I wanted to sooth him. Yet, I understood exactly what he was feeling. If someone forced Sam to do something, I would be livid. Turning, I wrapped my arms around him.
I touched the side of his face. Bringing his eyes down to look at me, I saw the pain in his eyes. I brushed my fingers along his stress marked brow until it softened under my touch. He brought his hand to mine, still pressed against his brow. Sam moved my fingers to his mouth, placing a kiss on my hand.
Once I felt his calmness through the bond, I turned to pay attention to the table. Both other couples looked to be in the midst of similar regulating activities. These bonds were something to get used to. The other couples took longer to control their emotions. Maybe they started later than Sam and I. I also just liked to think that we had a strong connection.
It still felt a bit crazy that Sam and I had as deep of a connection as we had. We had only just met by non-supernatural standards. Yet, it felt like I had known him my entire life. I found a slight smile touch my lips as I leaned back against my Sam, my mate.
"It is an old tradition. Apparently, in years past people would claim to be imprinted without the actual connection being there." Jacob started.
"Does he not trust us? For fuck sake, I am his daughter and you are his son. Can you not go into Paul's mind and see our imprint?" Rachel spat at her brother.
Jacob looked down, not wanting to make eye contact with his sister. Rachel had held him accountable for why her father forced her into the mist. It was clear on her face.
"I trust you. I trust my tribe. It's not that simple Rachel. Dad had to do it to you" Jacob sounded unsure of his words.
Rachel had visible tears streaming down her face. I could see the foggy lake had not been a good experience for her. I told more than I wanted to, yet, I did not think anything of the hurtful fog until Sam asked. Even then, I did not lead with the pain.
It was more-so that clawing of what I didn't want to say that upset me with the fog. It was not a creation of distrust with Billy or Charlie. Should I not trust them because of that fishing trip?
"It will not happen when Jake is Chief" Leah promised.
"How can you sit here and defend him Lee? You went on the boat too. You felt the pain. Fuck, you had it worse because you are a wolf. It would have hurt you more" Rachel was full of tears.
"Sure it hurt. If it meant that I got to be with Jacob, I don't care how bad it hurt. I would do it again for him" Leah looked pained as she spoke.
"No one is asking for you to go again." I shocked myself by speaking. I hadn't planned that. Seeing the pain on both Rachel and Leah's faces was jarring enough that it forced me to talk.
"How long were you in the fog?" Rachel asked me.
I thought about it. We arrived at the boat around 5am. When I got off… I paused. How long was I on the boat?
"Charlie dropped me off with you after I got off the water" I told Sam.
I watched Same face go pale. The bond was flooded with Sam's realization and panic. He pulled me closer into him. Like if he wasn't squeezing me to him, I would cease to exist.
"You did not come here until 4pm" Sam stated.
"Holy shit. You lasted 11 hours in the fog?" Leah looked shocked.
I shrugged, trying to not add to Sam's worry. I felt his consistent hum of anxiety come back.
"How did you do it?" Rachel asked.
"I wasn't about to swim to shore. That would have been rude." I told her honestly. It was not totally a lie.
"Bella, I made it maybe two hours. When I got off the boat I felt crazy. Like everything that I needed would never come back to me again. Like I would never see Paul again." Rachel's voice shook.
Paul pulled her closer. "Hey baby, I am right here. You are okay. Everything is here, everything you need you have. I got you" Paul cooed into her ear as he rocked her.
"I only lasted three hours. I needed to get off that boat. They tried pulling out all my dirty laundry. Poking holes into why I was not fit to be Jacob's imprint" Leah leaned back against Jake.
I could see the conflict within Jacob's eyes. He wanted to fully defend his imprint, yet that defence came by bad-talking his dad. After a moment he sighed, pulling Leah closer to him, giving into what his imprint needed regardless of his own beliefs on the situation.
Panic struck me. Would Sam still want to be with me if he knew all I said on the boat? At this point, would he feel obligated to stay imprinted to me, even if he didn't want too? Was there a choice that he could have? Was I taking all his freewill away, just like I saw in the conflict Jacob had in his eyes?
Sam rubbed my back, trying to soothe my panic. He was so kind. I wish I was better for him. I was not good enough. When would he discover this?
"He tried to do that with me, too. Reminding me of the importance of Paul's position. That I should not expect more from him than what he could provide. I think Dad just wanted me to not expect too much." Rachel sounded sad.
"Did he not go over your responsibilities?" Anger licked at Leah's words.
"Responsibilities?" Jacob raised his eyebrows.
Was Sam the only imprint that wanted to have this conversation? It sounded like Rachel told Paul. Though, the talk with everyone in a group had not happened yet. Why?
"Did we all get similar responsibilities?" Rachel rolled her eyes. I could see her trying to stay brave.
"Want to compare?" Leah encouraged with a sarcastic ring to her tone.
The men around the table seemed to all be too upset to speak. I could feel the anger through my bond with Sam. It was the same as the expression on Paul's face. Jacob's expression, however, was one of conflicting emotions; both anger for his imprint, and loyalty to his father.
"Well, a cat's got the boy's tongue. Might as well see if we each got the same lecture" Rachel leaned back as she spoke. Paul wrapped his arms around her.
It was clear that none of the men here were about to lose control. Leah looked annoyed, but not vibrating as I had seen before. I made a mental note to look for the signs. Kyle had lost control once when I was nearby. None of the wolves looked to be giving into their emotions.
"Lets do a raise-your-hand if you were told the following, okay?" Leah took control of the table. "The importance of keeping imprints sexually satisfied?"
All the men's jaws dropped as Rachel and Leah raised their hands.
"Are you kidding, you didn't get the sex talk with Billy?" Leah laughed.
"Um no. I don't think so, at least. We hadn't defined the relationship yet, though." I shrugged. Knowing that I liked not getting the sex talk from Billy, but, also wondering why I did not get that talk.
"Maybe that is it. Growing up here, we talked about imprints as children. They were in our childhood bedtime stories. It was almost natural for us to become mates instantly when we felt the imprint." Rachel squeezed Paul's hand.
"Yeah. Billy just asked that I make it clear what I wanted from this relationship." I told them.
"The second I was out on the lake, I had Billy telling me to give Jacob a baby" Leah rolled her eyes.
"What? Really?" Jacob sounded shocked.
"Yeah. But we imprinted when you were 16. Just because Billy asked, I wasn't going to make us teenage parents. Regardless of if the council would approve." Leah had a hand on Jacob's face as she spoke.
Jake seemed to be more upset. "Why did you not tell me?" He growled at Leah.
"Because of this reaction. Also, you didn't need to know until now." Leah cuddled into the growling Jacob. He stop growling as she cuddled him.
"Were you told to get on with baby making?" Paul asked Rachel.
"Not quite. I was told that we had to wait until Leah successfully carried their first child" Rachel admitted.
"What, why?" Leah's face scrunched up with confusion.
"Because Dad wants Jacob's child to be the next chief." Rachel's tone made it sound like it was obvious.
"Rachel, it would make sense for you and Paul to have a baby before we did. You are both older than Jacob." Leah sounded like this was the stupidest thing she had ever heard.
"You wouldn't be mad, then?" Rachel asked the couple.
"Rachel, why the hell would I be mad about gaining a family member? I have actually been waiting for you to make an announcement, if I am being truthful. I know Paul is in his last year of high school, but, I don't know, I just assumed you both would at least be expecting by now" Jacob sounded sincere. He paused. "I am going to get a round of drinks for the table. This conversation needs something stronger to sip on."
Jacob got up, placing Leah gracefully in the chair he just got up from. When he returned to the room, he poured an amber liquid half way up the glasses he brought with him. He slid them across the table with such control that it made him stand out as supernatural.
Two glasses landed between each couple. Leah picked hers up and slammed it back, putting her glass back down in front of her mate. A quiet smile crossed Jacob's face as he refilled her glass.
Sam followed Leah's lead, taking in the amber liquid with a steady, hard swallow. Without drawing the attention of the others, I switched our glasses.
Leah looked over at us and smiled "A girl after my own heart you got there Sam"
"She is the best, isn't she Leah?" Sam kissed the back of my neck.
I thought he might ask about my lack of wanting to drink later. In the back of my mind, I knew I had a lot of things to tell Sam. None needed to be told to everyone. In time I would share my past with my new friends, simply not yet.
Paul took a deep sip from his glass. It was almost like he knew it would have little effect on him. So, he took it into his body to simply enjoy the flavour.
"Oh, come on Rachel. I know whiskey is not your favourite, but it will make this conversation easier for you." Jacob complained to his sister.
"I can't" Rachel shook her head. Pushing the amber liquid away from her.
"Rachel, I am not offering it to you because I think you desperately need it. Just to take some of the edge off" Jacob frowned at his sister.
"Jacob. I can't drink." Rachels eyes held a sparkle.
Turning on Sam's lap, he held me tightly. I smiled against his chest. Not wanting to give away Rachel's secret before she told Jacob.
"Why? Did you start a new depression medication? I thought since the imprint, you didn't need to take those anymore" Jacob sounded confused.
I bit back an excited laugh. If I was right all hell was about to break loose. Sam kissed the top of my head. Through the bond I could sense that he understood exactly what Rachel was trying to tell Jacob.
"Its okay, Jacob. I will finish her glass for her" Paul sounded like he had a smile on his face.
When I finally thought I had control over my emotions I turned back to look at the table.
Jacob still looked confused. Leah didn't, she was beaming at her friend. I wanted to congratulate Rachel, but bit back my tongue. It was not my news to break. That was, even if I was right about it.
"Jacob. Why can't I drink?" Rachel teased her brother.
"Well, because I took a test this morning. Paul and I are expecting a pup" Her face broke out in a gorgeous smile. "So, I guess Dad's lectures on the fog lake can stop. I think he finds them binding. Obviously not."
Jacob walked over to his sister. Pulling her off Paul's lap, he spun her around, overjoyed by the news.
Sam got up, resting me carefully in the chair. Paul was on his feet before Sam reached him. Both men embraced in pure joy.
"Congratulations!" Sam patted Paul on the back.
"Thanks man." Paul seemed overjoyed.
"Well, I think that is a good time to end the hard conversation. Jacob will talk to Billy about not doing it to the imprints from now forward. Especially if he thought that the fog created a lasting agreement. He can talk to both wolf and imprint together" Leah suggested.
Jacob put Rachel down on her feet. Within moments, Paul was at her side, making sure everything was right with her. I could see him checking her over and over again. It was important for him to make sure she was okay. Especially now that she was carrying his child.
"I would love to stay, but I feel nauseous. I think I need to go and lay down." Rachel was still beaming with her news.
Everyone made their leave. Paul and Rachel for her to relax, and Jacob and Leah had to go on patrol. This left Sam and I alone. I turned to him. His anger was not what it was at the beginning of the conversation. Now it was non-existent. The knowledge of a new baby will do that.
"Well, I don't want to admit I am happy knowing the others were more questioned then you" Sam spoke softly.
He pulled me to the couch when the others left, not wanting to break physical contact with me. Not that I minded. Being in Sam's arms was the first place I had ever felt complete. If it were up to me, I would never leave.
"I think I might have just run conversation defence." I admitted.
"Oh?" Sam kissed my head.
"Every time he asked a question that could have led to more, I kinda blocked him with my answer. When he asked me if I knew what it was to be an Alphas mate, I blocked him by saying I would ask you" I shrugged. "Its kinda my super power" smiling against his chest.
It was nice to think of it like a super power instead of what it was actually considered. Which would be a trauma trained behaviour.
"I am glad you headed off his questions. I also promise you will never be questioned by him alone again." Sam's voice dipped low as he vowed.
I felt the sting of tears pricking at my eyes. In Sam's arms with his vow, the feeling of safety was overwhelming. This feeling was making it impossible for me to return back to Renee. I knew I must, it was only fair to return to my mother's house. Even for a short time, she birthed me after all.
Sam tightened his hold on me, the stupid bond betraying my feelings. I tried to cover them up again, instead sending happiness and contentedness to Sam through the bond.
"I thought we agreed you wouldn't cover your emotions any more" Sam ran his fingers through my hair as he spoke softly.
"Sorry" I dropped my illusion of happiness and content. Letting my true emotions of fear and unease shine through.
"Love ,what are we worried about?" Sam cooed.
"We?"
"Whatever is worrying you, is also worrying me"
Tears toppled from my eyes, each tear not waiting for the next one to land before it fell after. Sam held me as I cried. With each second I felt less capable to speak.
Sam did not rush my emotions, or my answer. He simply held me as I processed. For that I was grateful, after years of being forced to speak. It often felt like my truths were being ripped apart and examined, to be deployed over hot coals. Often the most important pieces of truth would burn up in the coals, never to be picked up to be saved and remembered.
Sam held me as I quelled my coals in my throat. He deserved the truth, or at least as much as I could give him today. I swallowed hard, trying to force the burning back inside of myself. To give Sam the truth he deserved, I could not be a burning man. For they only told what they could bear. Sam was worth more than that. I did not think I could give him all he deserved today. The burn in my throat was relentless. Each swallow caused me to cough, as the coals did not cease.
"Well… I-" Pausing to clear my throat. "I want to move here"
"I would like that very much" Sam kissed the top of my head.
I winced, knowing how hard it would be to actually move up here. My mother would be destitute without me. If Charlie was not my father, there was a chance she would be destitute with me, my mind reminded me. A shiver ran up my spine at that reminder.
"I need to tell my mother in person." I blurted out. Louder then I intended too. I felt if that truth came out slower, or quieter, it would have been swallowed by the coals.
"Would you like me to come with you?" Sam offered.
I paused in my crying, momentarily. It had felt like I would die if I left him here. Yet, now this perfect man was presenting an option that I had not seen. The coals in my throat died down, no longer burning blue hot, now a subtle red.
"I didn't live in the best location" I wanted to give him an out. My mind screamed that he wouldn't want me if he knew. I was not Alpha Mate chosen, I was magically selected.
"Bella. You are exactly who I was waiting for my entire life to meet. No matter what your past has, it will change nothing between us" Sam pulled my chin up to look him in the eyes.
The love I saw in his eyes made me melt. I needed his lips on mine. Sam dipped his face, our lips close to touching. I could not stand the gap, stretching to press mine against his.
Sam pulled me up his body, leaving the puddle of wet that my crying had left, to the warmth of his mouth. I parted mine slowly, dragging my tongue along his lower lip. With a deep growl, his mouth parted for me. I took my time exploring with my tongue. Each brush of my tongue, I felt the flames of the coals releasing their hold on my throat.
Sam's tongue reached out, embracing mine. My throat fully extinguished the coals with an excited noise. I knew I could tell Sam anything and he wouldn't change the way he kissed me. Sam wouldn't change the way he loved me.
Just as the world around him accommodated his movements, Sam himself accepted me. All of me. Even the hidden parts that I had not yet revealed. Sam was the other part of my soul. I wanted to hold him close and never release him. I felt our bond pulling us impossibly closer together, in a way that I did not even know soulmates could attain.
"Sam, I need to tell you more about my past. I don't want anything to be a surprise to you if you are joining me." I spoke against his warm, supple lips.
"I will gladly listen to everything you wish to share with me. You are my mate, I have lived years in waiting to hear your voice. Even if you speak hard words, I cannot wait to hear them from your lips. I will support you and love you no matter the topic." Sam broke our kiss. His head tilted to the side. "If you wish to just tell me, we will have to wait. I hear the boys walking with boxes."
Sam sat up, pulling me with him, cuddling me just as close to his chest. He brought a callused hand to my face, gently burning away the residue of tears from my cheeks. Sam brought his lips to mine for a light kiss, brushing away any ounce of shame from my previous fear.
I watched as Kyle and Embry brought two overfilled boxes upstairs, both boys trying to trip each other as they bounded up the stairs. A thump, bang, and curse sounded from one of the boys at the top of the stairs, followed by a cascade of laughter from each of them.
Turning, I captured Sam's mouth, enjoying the deepness at which he kissed me.
"I am really starting to love it here" I whispered against his mouth.
"Your happiness is my only goal" Sam whispered back.
Authors Note: Happy New Year. I hope 2022 is a year that you build skills and find happiness. I realized something when I posted this chapter today, the word count on my document has a grand total of 69,805 words. The average novel word count is between 50,000 and 70,000. Do not worry, this does not mean I am ending this story, we are just beginning in all honestly. I can not wait to read your reviews! This chapter was so fun to write and I really want to know what you think! Sending love to all of you! I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter!