Author's Note: Sorry for the extreme delay! I have been busy with school, exams and holidays! When I finally got round to writing it my computer decided to delete it!

Thankyou to Duck who beta'd again after starting again I was not too bothered about everything making sense so her job this time would have been even harder.

I would just like to explain that Russ is so moody because he is going through withdrawal. This is a chapter just to get to know the other character's. I don't have tourette's so I was just guessing with Ken, if I got anything wrong just tell me.

Orion's POV

One, two….three, I watched as the seconds slowly ticked by as I waited for this dull meeting to finally come to an end.

Before Christmas I had received a letter from the board of directors informing me that they wanted to close Eden hall as they believed it was draining money from other useful mental health resources. I had been desperately fighting to keep it open, and had not yet told the patients that the ward might be closing.

However after Fulton's suicide and Portman's transfer to a secure ward it was getting more difficult to convince them that Eden Hall was helping the current patients.

I watched Dr Buckley's mouth move as he droned on about 'budget cuts' and 'unhelpful treatments' I knew he was just trying to say in a round about way that no matter what we were going to be shut down. I had already put my proposals forward and they would be discussed by the board of directors, so my input into the meeting had actually ended.

"Well thank you all for attending this meeting Ted and I will review your points and get back to you," he flashed his teeth in a false smile and opened the door to let us out.

I walked from the main building over to Eden Hall trying to figure out how I could keep the facility open it was not going to be easy, if they had decided to shut us then there was no way that the patients could fund us.

I entered the ward and headed straight to my office. Removing my blazer and sitting in my chair I put my head in my hands hopelessly. What on earth was I going to do?

"So how did it go?" I looked and saw Gordon standing in my doorway.

I sighed heavily, my voice full of anguish, "It's not looking good."

Julie's POV

One, two, three ….four I counted my actions carefully in my head and repeated the counting until I was done. I had woken at 6 am to start my routine and it was now getting close to 8 am. I slowly counted my way back to my room checking that I made it in so many steps.

I entered my room and sat at our dressing table. I carefully counted the amount of time I brushed my hair and neatly tied it up. I realised that it there was a bump and with a sigh I pulled the tie out and started the whole ritual again. I checked that it was perfect knowing that was the only way my hair would not fall out. I carefully checked and got up to waked Connie as she sleeps through anything even an alarm. Just as I got close I realised that maybe I hadn't managed to check all of my hair so I walk back to the mirror and checked it. If it wasn't then my hair would fall out. It was fine.

I started to walk back over to Connie but then I realised that I might not have checked then entire of my hair so I walked back and checked because it might have fallen out or changed. I turned around and walked back to Connie. I shook her gently four times. I then paused to see if she would wake up and she didn't so I shook her another four times. She looked at me.

"Oh, hey Jules…" she rolled over pushing herself up. I walked back to my mirror and re-checked my hair, unable to control my paranoia.

An image of me with no hair popped into my head and I this lead onto thoughts that I might get another serious illness. I felt anxiety build up in my chest, my head started spinning, my heart was pounding and I thought I was going to be sick. I tried to think of other things but these thoughts kept pushing their way into my head and there was nothing I could do.

"Hey Jules… time for breakfast," I heard Connie's soft voice in back ground of the noise inside my head. I stood up and headed for breakfast. I pushed these thoughts as far back as possible. I felt tears well up in my eyes as I fought my darkest fear: I didn't want to die.

Ken's POV

I sat on the floor leaning back against the wall. I was so tired my motor tics had kept me up all night. I felt a build up in my chest and then up through my shoulders. I coughed then threw myself forwards. Great another tic.

I looked up and saw Jules and Connie heading towards us, Julie looked awful she had her arms wrapped around herself head down looking tearful.

I felt bad for her in a way I knew what OCD was like I had a mild case of it but not as bad as hers. I still can't believe I am stuck in a mental institution. I have tourettes. If I had been anyone else there was no way that I would have been committed but with my family appearances are everything. So I was stuck in here until I learnt to control all my tics.

"Come on, it's 9.30 we are already supposed to be at breakfast!" Nurse Heather groaned leading us through the car park and to the main building where we had breakfast. We managed to get across without any fuss. I sat on the end of the table and ordered Weetabix and toast.

I noticed a shy looking girl I didn't recognise who was about to walk past our table. I suddenly felt a build up in my throat. I scrunched my eyes closed and hoped I could suppress it.

"Bitch!" I yelled. I looked up apologetically and embarrassed at her, hoping she would understand. She rushed off and I felt so bad. I looked at the table. This is why I was locked up.

Russ's POV

I noticed Ken looking very embarrassed and upset. I don't see why he should, he just yelled what she probably was. I was sat between Charlie and orderly that had to accompany me at all times. It annoyed me having this person attached to me but I supposed I had to as I may have punched a doctor. I was now forced to go to anger management everyday. I had a splitting headache and I was trembling. The problems of withdrawal. My brother had come to visit me and brought some heroine thinking about it I know I shouldn't have had it but I was desperate so now I was going through it again.

I looked around at the table. It was very quiet. I couldn't believe that everyone was so down just because some guy on the ward off'ed himself and another had moved wards. So what? They were all nut jobs.

"Come on - let's go back to the ward!" Nurse Heather smiled in her usual overly cheerful way.

So we retraced our steps back to the ward and everyone had free time to get up to what every they wanted. I felt the orderly's hand on my shoulder and sagged in annoyance: it was time for anger management.

Maybe I should have taken the prison sentence.

Adam's POV

I watched Russ get pushed into one of the rooms for anger management. I could feel sorry for him but he did punch a doctor - not that I can deny I haven't been tempted. I leant back on the couch that I was sharing with Guy. Everyone was in the rec room and the mood a sombre. Nick walked in. they guy who had the privilege of taking us to the mall for Christmas shopping.

"Guys I know you are feeling down and it is awful what has happened but you can't let it affect your recovery. If you let it stop you then you will stop getting better you will be stuck here," he paused "How would you like to go see how Portman is doing?"

I looked up hopefully, knowing I wanted to see Portman, I knew that I had been getting close to Fulton and so in turn I ended up close to Portman.

Seeing our eager faces he nodded, "I'll go see what I can do."

As soon as he left people turned and started talking heatedly about what they thought a secure ward might be like.

"What do you think?" Guy asked me I shrugged.

I knew that no one on this ward had ever been in a secure ward. Even if you attempted suicide you ended up in the hospital then would end up back here and on suicide watch it was only if you kept attempting you would end up in secure.

Everyone turned expectantly as Nick entered. "Right I've rung through and it's ok for us to go over, I just have to get a couple more nurses and we're off," ever since Fulton's suicide they had tightened the rules and there had to be at least 1 nurse to every 2 patients.

As everyone was still ready from our breakfast outing we could leave immediately. The walk from Eden Hall to West Park - the secure ward - was nerve racking. They were about as far apart as you could get. We finally made it over there and entered the building. We had to go through numerous locked doors and wait in one while the other was opened. We got through to what looked like a security station and a doctor with neat, short brown hair in a white coat came to meet us and I had to resist the urge to cringe at the cliché.

"Ok first of all you can't go right into the cell as it is too risky to both your health and his. You should know he'll be different that you remember him." He turned without any further comment and we followed him through.

We passed several solid metal green doors, separated by badly dyed blue walls. The whole area was filthy. We finally reached a cell, where the doctor pulled down a shutter and stood back. I slowly walked toward the shutter, my heart in my throat as my stomach danced nervously, and what I saw shocked me. Dean was huddled in the corner, he was dressed in doctor's blue scrubs. He had his head buried in his palms and was muttering to himself. He lifted his head a looked at me, his eyes were red and puffy, I lifted my hand and waved. I noticed a flash of recognition in his dull eyes before it passed and he seemed to just be looking through me.

I turned to the doctor and pulled out my pen - 'what happened?' I scribbled on my board, my hand trembling.

"The Dean Portman you knew had multiple personality disorder, now the only way to describe it is that he has completely broken down and now has no personalities. He is a broken man."

If any other doctor had said it I might have not minded but this doctor sounded disgusted. What did he expect if a person had lost the love of their life?

"What do you expect? He saw the body of his dead lover!" Guy snapped angrily his loud voice echoing my thoughts. The pain we were all feeling was clear on his face.

Nick then quickly shuffled us back to Eden hall. On the way back Guy turned to Nick and asked

"Will he ever be ok?" Guy asked, unable to keep the hope and sorrow from his voice.

"I doubt it, for some people it's just too late."

Dex

Thanks for reading.