32 Productions Presents…
A Teen Titan Fan Fiction The Teen Titans in…"Hit the Surf"
Chapter Three
Shade and Robin's Room
Shade put the pillow over his head, but it didn't help. The noise of the teen wonder's snoring cut through like a knife. How could it be possible? How could somebody so skilled at stealth be so damn noisy! Shade looked at the pillow in his hand. It would be so simple…just place the pillow over Robin's face…hold it there for a little while…and blessed silence would rule the night. Then he would sleep. Oh such sleep there would be. Then again, knowing his luck, Robin would beat the crap out of him in his sleep if he tried to kill him. To hell with it. Shade got up and left. He'd sleep on the damn couch.
Starfire and Raven's Room
Starfire: …Raven?
Raven's eyes snapped open.
Raven: …what?
Starfire: …er…how many sharks are there in the ocean?
Raven: I haven't taken a poll lately. You can find out tomorrow. Now go to sleep.
Starfire: But…
Raven's eye twitched.
Raven: You can't sleep, can you?
Starfire: …no.
Raven: Let me help.
A bolt of black energy shot from Raven's chakra stone and struck Starfire. She was out like a light. Raven sighed in relief and rolled over. Unfortunately, all was not well with Starfire as she began having nightmares of teeth, fins, and Robert Shaw. The horror.
Terra and Beast Boy's Room
If anyone was awake in that room, they'd be amazed. The pair snored at an exact opposite frequency, canceling each other out. It was dead silent in between them, but around them was a terrible cacophony of noise the likes of which would cause the dead to clamber from their graves just to silence it. Thank god the rooms were actually sound proof. Not that they knew that.
Cyborg's Room
…he's asleep. There's really nothing I can say about him.
TV Room
Terra and Beast Boy snickered to themselves as they watched Shade sleep. He was curled up on the couch, his leg twitching.
Terra: He's like a puppy.
Beast Boy: …wanna mess with him?
Terra: (grinning) How could we not?
Digging through the closet yielded some colored markers. Together they got to work, Terra using red, Beast Boy using green. They drew all sorts of things on his face. From the traditional moustache and goatee, to swirls and squiggly lines on his cheeks, they made him into a regular art project. As a finishing touch, Beast Boy wrote, "sucker" backwards on his forehead. That way when he looked in the mirror he'd see it forward. Giggling to themselves, they started digging through the stuff they brought with them in search of breakfast. Lured into the waking world by the smell of Terra's bacon, Cyborg soon joined them.
Cyborg: Morning, ya'll.
They both shushed him and pointed toward the sleeping Shade.
Beast Boy: (whisper) Dude, check out his face!
Cyborg peered down at him and covered his mouth so he didn't wake him up with his laughter.
Cyborg: (whisper) You realize he's gonna kill you, right?
Terra: (whisper) Look at his face and tell me it's not worth it.
She had him there. The others woke up in due course. Shade, naturally, was the last one to wake up.
Shade: Hey, what's up?
Everyone bit their lips, trying not to laugh out loud. Even Raven had to hold it in. He was just so utterly clueless. Not getting a response, Shade went back to his room to get changed. Two minutes later his voice split the air.
Shade: You little snot! I know it was you!
Terra debated confessing to her part in it as Shade chased the changeling around the house. …nah. She sipped her orange juice as she watched the mayhem.
Jump City: Fashion Store
Mad Mod (young again) went around the place, examining the clothing and fabric.
Mod: Oi, what is this junk even made of!
Snapping his fingers, his robotic "fashion police" fired flame throwers at the jackets. He shook his head. What was with the young folk these days? Back in his day when he was a clothing designer, he didn't sell garbage like this. Now all the kids wore were their baggy pants and their "bling-bling". Well, it was time for the Mod line of fashion to make a comeback, starting with Jump City. His thoughts were interrupted by twin glowing red hammers slamming down on two of his fashion police. He turned and was rather surprised at the group of teens before him. Obviously not who he was expecting.
Mod: What's all this then? Who are you lot supposed to be?
Sureshot: I warned you during your ridiculous attempt to make your hair style popular again.
Mod: Oh, right. I remember you. I also remember how well this worked.
Mad Mod pressed a button on his cane. The blank face plates on the robots turned into a familiar swirling pattern. Sureshot covered her eyes. Last time it was only her foresight that saved her from being a mindless zombie. She attached electrodes to her skin. It seemed a quick jolt had the same effect as making someone laugh. As ashamed as she was by it, she couldn't deny that she fell into trances far too easily since Raven fixed her mind.
Sureshot: Don't look into it. It'll put you in a trance.
Kid Flash: I got this.
Kid Flash zipped around, grabbing clothes off racks. He tied them around the robot's face plates, covering the swirling pattern. He zipped back to the same spot he was in when he started running.
Kid Flash: Done. Not bad, eh Argent?
Argent: Whatever.
Panthra and Wildebeest destroyed the robots, leaving Mod all by himself.
Herald: One thing I don't understand. Isn't Mad Mod like…sixty?
Mad Mod: You're only as old as you feel, duckie.
Mod's arms shot forward…and forward…and forward. They wrapped around Argent and Herald, squeezing them tightly.
Sureshot: It's just a robot. Red Star, take it.
A single blast from Red Star was able to destroy the Mod synthetic.
Panthra: …well, that was a waste of time.
Sureshot sighed.
Sureshot: Hopefully not…
Sureshot pulled a device from her pocket.
Kid Flash: Is now really time to listen to music?
Sureshot: It's not an MP3 player. It's a scanner for explosives.
Sweeping over the destroyed robot, she found no signs of explosives. She put the device away and picked up what she could.
Sureshot: Somebody grab one of those police robots.
Argent: …why?
Sureshot: I may be able to find out where this thing was assembled. Herald, you developed that horn, didn't you?
Herald: Yeah…
Sureshot: Then you probably know mechanics better then I do. I'll need your help. Let's go.
Herald blew into his horn, opening a portal that led back to the tower.
Beach
Starfire stared at the water. Was that a fin! No, just a wave. She had to get a grip. Beast Boy said it was like getting more likely to get struck by lightning twice. That meant that there was a very small chance she'd be attacked. But there was still a chance and…
Robin: …fire. Starfire, you okay?
Starfire's head snapped back to reality. Robin leaned on his surf board, shirtless, obviously. Starfire gulped and attempted to keep her eyes on his face.
Starfire: Don't stare at his body. Don't stare at his body. …I didn't know he had a six pack…NO! Don't stare at his body! Yes! I am chest fine! I mean just fine!
Starfire's face was bright red. Raven turned the page of her book.
Raven: Smooth. I don't think he noticed that at all. Ow!
Raven glared up at the alien. Starfire put her hand over her mouth and gasped.
Starfire: Dear me, Raven. Did I step upon your foot? My apologies.
Raven was tempted to react with a violent action of her own, but decided against it. She HAD poked fun at Starfire at a bad time. Raven adjusted the umbrella she was under. Damn the sun. Her skin didn't exactly tan. It grayed. It became darker…but a darker gray. Then it burned, turning a redish gray which was just plain freaky...and reminded her of her father. Which was why she was going to stay right under that umbrella. Raven was going to relax, listen to the sound of the ocean crashing and the seagulls in the air, and read her book out of the sun. Now THIS was her idea of a vacation. Naturally fate began to conspire against her.
Terra: Hey Raven!
Raven tried to ignore Terra who was yelling from the ocean, waving her arms.
Terra: Raven, Raven! Rae-Rae!
Raven: I hear nothing but the ocean. I hear nothing but the ocean. I he…
Raven's mental mantra was cut off as her umbrella covered her face. Terra had caused the sand around the umbrella to pull it under, lowering it to the point where Raven couldn't see. She lifted it back up, looking out toward the girl.
Raven: What!
Terra: C'mon in! The water's great!
Raven: No!
Note that Raven is yelling to be heard, not in anger…that will come later.
Terra: Oh, you WILL be coming into this water!
Raven: I don't think so!
Terra: You come into this water or I'll put so much sand down your bikini you'll look like you gain twenty pounds!
As if to prove her point, the sand in front of Raven moved, forming the words, "I'll do it. I swear." Raven pinched the bridge of her nose.
Raven: Alright, alright! Just let me put on some sun…
Shade was suddenly right next to her, bottle of sun block in hand.
Raven: …block. You sad little man.
Shade: What? I just happened to be here…with sunblock.
Raven: …give me that.
Raven put the sun block on the best she could. She sighed.
Raven: I suppose now you want to put it on my back for me.
Shade just sat there. Raven rubbed her temples. He was going to play games. Wonder. Just what she needed.
Raven: …Shade, would you be so kind as to put this sun block on my back?
Shade: Sure! I mean…yeah okay.
Raven lay on her towel as Shade put the sun block on her back.
Raven: …if that hand goes too far south, you lose it.
Shade: Don't insult me. Like I'd do something like that.
Raven: And all those times you walked in on me in the shower were accidents.
Shade: …they were. …really.
Raven: …are you going to wear that shirt in the water?
Shade refused to go out without his shirt. He didn't like the fact everyone could see the scars on his arms and legs enough as it is.
Shade: Oh, I'm not going in the water, Raven.
Raven's hand shot up and grabbed his shirt.
Raven: If I'm getting in the damn water, YOU'RE getting in that damn water.
Shade: Why do you always have to drag me into these things?
Raven: Misery loves company.
Shade hung his head and followed Raven toward the water like he was heading for the gallows. Standing near the edge of the water was Starfire.
Shade: …er…Star? You getting in or not?
Starfire: Oh, I am in! See?
Starfire pointed to her feet. The water just barely washed over them. She grinned with false enthusiasm.
Starfire: I am having the wonderful time!
Shade: Uh huh…
Raven: GAH! Cold, cold, cold, cold…
Raven made it out to where Terra was waiting, teeth chattering.
Raven: Th…there. I'm in the water. C…can I go back now?
Terra: Relax! It's not that cold.
Raven: You can't feel!
Terra: …yeah…well…your hair is stupid.
Raven rolled her eyes, teeth still chattering. Shade huffed, arms crossed.
Shade: Well, I'm wet now. Can we go?
Terra: Chill out! Have a little…
SPLASH! A wave broke over them. Terra, being heavy and made of stone, didn't move. Raven and Shade, however, were bowled over. They stood back up, sputtering and wiping at their faces.
Terra: …fun!
Shade: …I am so full of hate right now.
Starfire bit her lip as she watched her friends out in the dangerous ocean. When the water struck Raven and Shade and they disappeared, she feared the worst. This was horrible! What if…wait… Starfire squinted. She was sure she saw something this time. No doubt about it…there was something under the water…something that wasn't human. Cyborg noticed Starfire staring into the water with such great intensity and decided to see what was up.
Cyborg: Uh…Star? You alright?
Starfire: …
Starfire took to the air and dove down. Meanwhile Terra was blissfully unaware of the dark shape slinking up behind her.
Terra: See? Aren't you having fun?
Shade and Raven's eyes had turned red and bloodshot from all the seawater that had gotten in them. Raven stopped shivering, but that was because her body seemed to have gone numb.
Shade: No.
Raven: Not really.
Starfire hit the water with such force that for an instant, there was no water around the trio. Then it all came collapsing back onto them. Raven picked off pieces of seaweed, a mixture of annoyance and disgust on her face. Terra had shrimp on her. As for Shade…
Shade: GAAAH! Evil pinching demon of the deep!
Shade shook his hand frantically, trying to dislodge the crab that seemed to have claimed his middle finger for itself.
Shade: Let go! I flick people off with that finger!
Starfire reemerged with Beast Boy in her grasp.
Starfire: …Beast Boy? But I could have sworn that…
Beast Boy: (coughing) Star, what is your malfunction!
Starfire: Malfunction? I am not a machine, Beast Boy. I do not have "malfunctions".
Terra: He means why did you dive bomb him and why are you lifting him up by his arm.
Starfire: Oh! I mistook you for a shark.
Beast Boy: I WAS a shark. I was just going to pass by with my fin out!
Terra: Besides, Starfire. Don't you think I can handle a shark? I'm made of stone.
Beast Boy: Actually, since a shark can put several tons of pressure into a bite, I'm pretty sure it would be able to take a chunk out of you if it really wanted.
Terra sweatdropped.
Terra: …how reassuring. …uh, Star? Maybe you should put him down now, huh?
Starfire: Hmm? Oh, yes, of course.
Starfire dropped Beast Boy with a splash. Meanwhile, Raven attempted to pull the crab from Shade's hand.
Shade: Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow! That's not helping!
Raven: Stop being such a…
SPLASH. Another wave. Raven wiped her dripping hair out of her eyes, a dark expression on her face.
Raven: …baby.
Starfire: Allow me.
Starfire pried the crabs claws open easily. She tossed the crab into the water.
Starfire: There we are.
Terra: Glad to see you're enjoying the water now, Starfire.
Starfire froze. The water? Starfire was in the water. Sharks were in the water. Starfire was in the water with sharks. As this fact registered in her mind, she did the only rational thing. With a scream of fright, she flew straight up into the air. Her friends watched her go.
Beast Boy: Don't think that was the right thing to say, Terra.
Terra: Eh.
Raven: Can we PLEASE…
SPLASH. Raven wiped her hair out of her eyes again and flicked a sea slug off her nose.
Raven: …go now!
Terra: Well, I…
Shade let out another scream of pain. Wrapped around his arm was a jellyfish.
Shade: It's like a thousand needles of PAIN! And it's slimy! Get it off! Get it off!
Beast Boy and Terra snickered. This was not Shade's most manly moment. Raven clenched her fists.
Raven: Enough!
Raven ripped the jellyfish off with her powers and flung it a mile out to sea. She grabbed Shade's hand.
Raven: We are…
SPLASH!
Raven: (sputter) LEAVING.
Shade: Final…LY!
Raven dragged Shade back to her towel.
Raven: Damn that girl. I'm soaked and covered in sand. I can't read my book now.
Shade: …what about me?
Raven: What about you?
Shade pointed to his bleeding finger and his arm which had begun to swell. Raven sweatdropped.
Raven: …okay, that's pretty bad. …I wonder where Starfire is?
As if on cue, Starfire landed in front of them. She sighed.
Starfire: That was most embarrassing.
Shade: …okay. Starfire's here. Beast Boy and Terra are splashing around over there. Robin is surfing way out there…where's Cyborg?
Not too far away, Cyborg was quickly discovering what happens when your robotic joints fill with sand.
Raven: I'm sure he's fine.
Suddenly Shade found a load of sand kicked into his face. Looking up, Raven saw two muscle bound jocks. She sighed and shook her head.
Raven: Could this BE anymore cliché?
The two jocks proceeded to hit on the two girls. Starfire didn't understand half the come-ons and what she DID understand offended her. Raven amused herself by trying to make them think by using big words. The concept of the multi-syllabic words stumped them. Finally Shade managed to get all the sand out of his eyes.
Shade: …can I do it now?
Raven: Go ahead.
Shade cracked his knuckles. The jocks didn't even have time to mock his skinniness before he started beating the crap out of them.
END PART THREE