Author's notes: OK, thanks to Beej96, I am now concerned that someone might think I know anything about jumping cars safely. I don't, I made it up. Whatever you do, don't try anything I write about at home. Or on the street. Or over a creek. I have been known to 'get air' now and again, but not on purpose, and not without immediate regret.

Thanks to those who read, double thanks to those who review, and triple thanks to those who review and give me a heads up that I might be sending someone off the edge of a cliff with my car jumping instructions.

I'm still fighting with the document manager, and still using O's to convey breaks. Not my preferred method, but I have to give the perfectionist side of me a rest (right, HH?) and get on with posting.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Dukes or any of the main characters. Andy's a hybrid - he runs on gas and (hot) air...

Chapter 5 – It Ain't Gonna Happen

Sheriff Coltrane was between a rock and a hard place. At the one side, he had Boss Hogg, making him sweat out every expense of his campaign. On the other was this rookie of an ATF agent, who seemed to be dragging his federal feet when it came to doing his sworn duty. And over his head hung the election itself, which, for once, he could actually lose. If he had any alternatives, Rosco might have welcomed a sound trouncing at the polls, which would at least get him out of this fix he was in. But, with only five more years to go before he'd be eligible for his pension, and no other trade with which to support himself, the sheriff couldn't afford to lose his job.

So he was forced to go up the steps of the county office building and try to get that lousy Andy Roach to do what the good government of the USA had hired him to do. Rosco'd have to stop treating this kid like a peer and instead go in and really menace him. The sheriff hated to do it, but the whipper-snapper had asked for it.

Hands at the ready to grab for his gun (well, it worked on suspects, why not rookie agents?), legs slightly apart, shoulders back and head held high, the sheriff swaggered into the ATF branch office.

"Now listen here, Agent Roach…"

"I'm sorry, Sheriff Coltrane, could you come back later? I'm rather busy right now." Andy was just working on his monthly reports, which could wait, but he couldn't resist the opportunity to rile the sheriff. He'd seen Rosco babbling at the Boar's Nest the other night and wanted his own private show.

"Gij, gyu, no, I couldn't come back later. I'm an important man! I'm the sheriff!"

Perfectly reasonably, Andy replied, "All right, Sheriff, what can I do for you?"

"Gyu, now that's better. I want to know what you've been doing about that Duke family. They're out there makin' 'shine and you're up here bein' 'busy.' Ijit."

"Now, Sheriff, you know I can't divulge department information to the local authorities without written instructions to do so. You'll need to call Atlanta and request an official report." Andy casually rose to his feet and walked up alongside Rosco, putting an arm around him companionably.

"Ijit! You're just… you're obstructin' justice is what you're doin'. Gitcher hands… now quit that."

Andy had been leading the sheriff to the door, but now he stopped and presented Rosco with completely innocent wide eyes. "What, Sheriff? I was just taking you to the lobby where there's a payphone. You can call Atlanta from there, and ask for Agent Higgins. He'll remember you, and expedite your request so you get your report in oh, two or three months."

"Two or three… gyu, now you listen! I'm the sheriff here and I got a right to know what you're doin' gij, to stop the law-breakin' in my county!"

"Of course you do, Sheriff. And I'm sure you'll find the office in Atlanta to be very helpful, when you call them." Andy smiled as he finally brought Rosco to the door. "Now you have a good day, Sheriff. Oh, and let me know if you catch those Duke boys. Seems to me they've been doing a lot of speeding lately, and I assume that the right place to report that to is the Sheriff's Department? So consider this an official complaint. Those Duke boys are a menace on the road, and I expect the duly elected sheriff to put a stop to it. Good-bye, Sheriff," Andy finished, helping the man into the hallway and closing the glass door behind him. The agent watched as Rosco stalked down the hall, pausing to cock his head once or twice.

"Tellin' me who's doin' what and he's not even… catch those Duke boys, I'll show him, ijit, he'll wish he'd never… they'll be, I'll just…" Rosco turned the corner and was gone.

The young agent was slightly remorseful. He probably shouldn't have done that, considering he was likely to need the sheriff's assistance when the time came to actually catch the Duke boys in the act.

Jesse Duke placed the ignition key for Black Tilly on the table in front of Luke.

Understanding the tacit assignment Luke asked, "Where to?"

"Old Silas."

Luke sighed. Silas was one of his least favorite deliveries. It meant a several hour trip up into some of the wilds of Tennessee, where there wasn't even a radio reception to speak of. Silas himself was older than Jesse, usually sloshed, and always talkative. Before he'd give you what he owed for the liquor, he'd keep you around for another couple of hours, chatting. He was one of the family's most regular customers, though, as the distributor for the entire southeast Tennessee area, and paid top dollar.

"Can I take Bo with me?"

Jesse's eyes twinkled. "I think that would be a good idea. You be careful, though, and watch after your cousin. And Luke? I don't want him drivin' yet. You drive this one, then sit shotgun with him on the next one, you understand?"

"Yes, sir."

"And stay off the roads in Hazzard. We don't know this new Roach guy. Watch yourself in Chickasaw, too."

Luke smiled. "You got it."

If she hadn't known that the boys would be off on a 'shine run that night, Daisy would have had them come get her after work. She was still torn about Andy Roach, and found that spending time with him was a form of torture, sometimes sweet, but increasingly just uncomfortable. She glanced down the bar where Andy had taken his usual place at the end.

Enos was also there, sitting with Cooter towards the back. He and Daisy had exchanged awkward greetings and she'd taken his order, but that was about it. Enos hated that it had come to this, but his job was the most important thing. He still hoped to wind up with Daisy some day, but could never ask her to betroth herself to an unemployed man. His romantic future would have to wait until his financial future was secured.

Daisy scanned the rest of the crowd, which was relatively tame. Tonight would be an early closing, she could tell. None of their regular late night patrons were there, nor were likely to show up, since they hadn't already. The mill had paid last week, and with its two week pay schedule, that meant most people were eating a lot of free popcorn and drinking comparatively little watered down liquor.

"Terrific," she whispered to no one in particular. A bad night for tips, and soon she'd be alone with the man she was becoming more and more sure that she would have to break up with, though she didn't want to.

"Careful, Bo."

"I am being careful." He and Luke had been enjoying the game they'd nearly perfected as kids, wherein Bo would flip a bottle over his shoulder, end over end, and Luke would catch it easily before stashing it in a padded compartment along the inside of the car's trunk. Tonight's game was enhanced by the darkness; as kids they'd always done it in daylight. Bo had been slightly off in his aim with that last bottle, but Luke had caught it easily enough, and there was no damage. Sometimes Bo wondered whether it was the Marine training, the war itself, or just his own nature that had turned Luke into such an old man before his time. Not so very long ago, Luke would have relished the sport of catching one of Bo's misthrows. "It's fine, Luke."

"Only because you got lucky. Just watch what you're doing, all right?"

Bo was glad to be going on this run with Luke. He'd been on a couple with Jesse, but so far any that Luke had taken since he'd gotten back were solo runs. Bo was going to make it a point not to annoy his older cousin tonight, so he bit his tongue and watched what he was doing. Soon enough they had loaded the car, both with the 'shine and themselves. Bo had asked to drive and gotten laughed at.

"Next time, maybe. This time you just watch and learn, little cousin," Luke had said with a smirk, knowing Bo resented what had once been a fond nickname, but was now not only something of a putdown, but totally inappropriate. Bo chose to be a good sport about it.

Before long, they were rolling, blacked out, along a trail that Jesse had cut decades before. This was a widened deer path, parallel to Upper Ridge Road, generally protected from view by the brush that grew on either side. There were only a few parts of it that could be spotted from the road to the south, and Luke would have to pay careful attention through those areas. Otherwise, at this time of night, they could expect an uneventful trip, at least until they had to hit the roads of Chickasaw. The only other thing to be mindful of was the full moon, which could reveal even a black matte car like Tilly.

"Sure is quiet out here at night, ain't it?" Bo asked conversationally.

"You know what they used to say about that in the Corps?"

Bo was surprised that Luke was bringing up his time in the Marines, since he'd been so reluctant to talk about it much after returning to Hazzard. "What?"

"'At least if he's making noise, you know where your enemy is. It's when he's quiet that you need to watch your… tail.'" Here in Hazzard, even outside of the presence of his uncle, Luke automatically softened the actual phrase.

"Well, we're both watchin' so we'll be okay." Seeing as how his cousin seemed to be in the right mood now, Bo took a risk, "Was it scary over there, at night?"

"Yeah, cuz, it was." Luke was quiet for awhile, but Bo didn't press him. His older cousin has always been one to say something only when he really wanted to, and that characteristic had certainly become stronger in the past three years. "Not every night, but when you were out on a mission, for sure. You never knew… the enemy had the home territory advantage, so you never knew which direction they could come at ya from…"

The interior of the car was suddenly bright, causing Luke to swerve Tilly into some bushes and cut the engine, swearing under his breath. Bo watched as a car passed not more than five hundred feet away, on the main road. They'd just gone through one of the bare spots on Jesse's trail and Luke had been so distracted that he'd just kept rolling without looking for trouble first. For a split second the other car had been at the right angle to catch Tilly in its headlights. The boys had both been surprised by the quick flicker of light in their eyes, and by the time they'd pulled over and their eyes had readjusted to the darkness, the other car had been too far away to identify.

The Duke boys sat silently, catching their breath, and letting their heart rates come back to normal. The other car hadn't slowed or changed direction at all, and was now out of sight.

"I don't think he even saw us," Bo ventured, hoping to spare his cousin from the self-flagellation that Bo knew was coming. If there was anyone that was good at feeling bad, it was Luke.

"Let's hope not. Odds are it ain't nobody we need to worry about anyways. But Bo, that was a lesson in what not to do. Don't ever forget where you are or what you're doing." Luke was never one to yell when he was angry. And his quiet tone of voice right now indicated that he was more than a little upset.

They both kept quiet as Luke restarted the car and began moving again. To Bo's surprise, Luke spoke first.

"Bo, when you're makin' a run, you have to always be concentratin' on exactly what you're doing. It's kinda like war. One mistake can really cost you."

"Yeah, cost you five years."

"Five years is one thing, Bo. What we had back there coulda been bad. But it can get worse. If you're runnin' from a revenuer at high speed and you lose control of the car… five years would be a blessing compared to that. Bo, I need you to promise me somethin'."

"What's that?"

"If you're on the run from the law, no matter which law it is, and you ain't sure you can control the car, promise me you'll stop. Let 'em have ya for five years if it'll keep ya alive, okay?"

"Ah, Luke, it ain't gonna happen. You worry too much."

"Prob'ly not," Luke agreed. "Promise me anyways."

"All right, if it'll make ya quit buggin' me, I promise."

Again, Daisy was in a foul mood as she got into Andy's car. It was hard to believe that only a week ago she'd been so excited to see him at the end of each night. Now she was miserable when she didn't see him, but even worse when she did.

"Hey sweetheart," Andy greeted gently. She was obviously unhappy, and he hated to see her this way. "Want to talk about it?"

Much like Bo, Daisy had a habit of blurting what was on her mind, then having to take it back later.

"No, I don't. Yes, I do! I can't keep going on this way Andy! It's too hard, misleadin' my family, always worryin' about getting' caught…"

"Shh, honey." Andy tried to take her into her arms, but Daisy stiffened instead of leaning into his embrace.

"Andy, I need you to take me home, please," Daisy begged, tears in her eyes and beginning to fall down her cheeks. "I just can't do this anymore."

The ATF agent let her go and started the car, though it was the last thing he wanted to do right then. So many things in life he'd learned to take by force: an unruly prisoner, entry to a suspect's house when the door was barred, even a statement, if necessary. But a woman, this woman's love, he would only take with permission. If she wanted to go home, that was where he would take her. He wouldn't let her go without pleading his case, though. He spoke as he drove.

"What are you saying, Daisy? That we can't see each other any more?"

"I… I don't know Andy. I want to be with you, but who you are, well, we ain't exactly a perfect match are we?" Daisy had never admitted to Andy what her family did to earn its living, and the agent had never asked her to. She assumed he knew, but she wasn't going to take a chance of admitting guilt to him. She owed her family that much.

"I think we could be…" Andy tried.

"No, honey, we couldn't. My family is much too important to me. My uncle raised me all my life, or all that I can remember. And Bo and Luke…" Daisy swallowed to keep her voice from cracking, "Bo and Luke are like my brothers." That was all she could manage before giving in to tears, dropping her face into her hands.

At that moment, watching the road around him, Andy saw something that took his breath away. For just the briefest moment, his high beams reflected off a car with a black matte finish and no headlights, which his trained eye recognized as a runner. The car was off the road, or at least off the main road, by a short distance. The ATF agent didn't even bother to look for brake lights, he knew they would have been disconnected long ago. It didn't matter though. In that split second he'd spotted two heads, one of which glowed with golden hair. He'd seen the Duke boys making a run.

He glanced over at Daisy next to him. Her head was still down, so she had no idea what had just happened. As much as he wanted to take off after the Duke boys right now, or at the very least roll down his window to try to catch the sound of the car so he'd have an idea of its course, he couldn't do that with the sobbing woman next to him. He cared too much about her to bring her along on her own cousins' bust.

Instead, he brought her home.

"Daisy? We're here."

"I know," she answered almost inaudibly.

"Honey, I know this is hard on you. But what we have is really special, don't you think?"

Daisy was forced to agree that it was.

"Then do me a favor, okay? Just think about it for a couple of days before you make a decision, all right?"

Although Daisy was pretty sure a few days wouldn't make a difference, she agreed to think about it anyway. After all, she supposed she loved him, too.

"Here you go, Sheriff." Enos did not need to bring coffee to his superior officer, he chose to. The older man looked tired, and they had a long shift ahead of them.

"Thank you, Enos."

"Is everything okay, Sheriff?" Enos wasn't sure whether it was wise to be this forward with his boss, but Rosco seemed so down that common courtesy forced his deputy to ask about it.

"Yes, Enos, I'm fine. I'll tell you what though, I'm tired of being the sheriff."

"Sheriff?" Enos was astounded. He couldn't imagine a more important job than the one his boss had.

Rosco's eyes were focused on the bars of the empty jail cell in front of him, not on his newest charge. "It gets old, Enos. You got the people lookin' to you to keep order, then the government tellin' you which laws to enforce and which to ignore, and there's the other branches of the law, not doin' their part. Ain't none of them your friends, Enos. A sheriff has no friends."

"I'm your friend, Sheriff," it came out without thought. Enos could never stand to see another man suffer. Besides it was true, he and his superior officer were on the same side, and that made them friends, as far as Enos was concerned.

Rosco let out a dry laugh. "That ain't so, Enos. You're my deputy; I'm your boss. We ain't friends. I like you just fine, but we ain't friends."

"But Sheriff…"

"There's no buts about it, Deputy. When you give your soul to the law, the people that was your friends, they can't be your friends no more. They like ya when you protect 'em, but when you gotta lay down the law against 'em, you learn. Enos, if you're gonna be a career law man, you gotta resign yourself to the fact that you can't have no friends."

"Yes sir, Sheriff." Enos, too, focused on the empty jail cell, thinking about what his boss had just told him. He didn't totally agree with Rosco's assessment, but he could see where having the duty to arrest a law-breaker could change the balance of power in an otherwise friendly relationship. There was one thing he couldn't let go, though.

"But Sheriff? You're still my friend."

Rosco chuckled. Enos noticed that the sheriff hadn't stammered once during their entire conversation.