I was running around my apartment, looking for something to wear. "I mean, what do you wear to see your shrink, Brooke? I mean, he already knows I'm crazy, will he pick on what I chose to wear, too? What do I do, Brooke!" I went into the living room where Brooke was watching TV.
"Wear what you're wearing now, Hales! You look fine!" she replied and I looked down at my outfit.
I was in a tank top and shorts. "Brooke, this something you wear to bed, not to see your shrink!" I yelled.
"Unless your shrink is hot and sexy," she pointed out and I groaned in frustration.
I went back into my room. I picked out a light blue hollister polo with a pair of dark blue hip hugger jeans. I put them on and went back out to the living room. "So, Brooke, how do I look?"
"Great, tutor girl, now get going so I can pay attention to Days of our Lives," she said, not looking at me once.
"Okay, okay. Give me your keys," I said and she threw them to me. Just as I was grabbing my purse, the door opened revealing Nathan. "Hi," I said softly.
He smiled. "Hey. Are you leaving?" I nodded and walked over to him. I kissed him softly and then pulled him into a hug. "Thank you," he said quietly and then kissed my neck.
"I'm doing this for you, Nate. That's how much you mean to me," I responded and pulled back. I held his face in my hands and kissed him one last lingering time before leaving.
I made it to the therapist's office in 15 minutes. I walked in, seemingly confident. I went to the front and totally started freaking out in my mind. The girl looked up at me and I said, "Hi, I'm Haley James and I-"
"He's expecting you, miss James. Go right in," she said pointing to the door down the hall.
I nodded and started walking. Was I late? Was he going to pick me apart because of it? Was he going to say that's a symptom of being crazy? I knocked and heard him say, "come in!" I walked in and saw him sitting at his desk. "Miss James, I presume?" I nodded. "Please, have a seat. Make yourself comfortable."
I nodded and went to sit on the couch. "I've never done this before," I said with a slight laugh.
"Well, lets start out by you telling me about yourself."
I was quiet for a minute. "Well, what do you want to know?"
His face was expressionless. "Anything you want to tell me, Haley."
"Okay," I started. "I'm Haley James. I'm 20 years old. I have a dog named Millie, a boyfriend named Nathan, and a best friend named Brooke."
"When did you start seeing Nathan?" he asked, writing things down.
"Um, about two weeks," I answered and he just nodded. "Does that matter?"
"I was just curious, Haley. Keep going," he replied.
"Okay, well that's basically it," I said and started to play with my hands.
"Well, what about your childhood, Haley? Care to tell me about that?"
I sighed and told him my whole life story, from my parents, to Peyton, to Chris. He remained quiet through out the whole thing, only a few 'mmhmm's and 'yes's were uttered as I spoke. Now, we sat in silence. Well, for a minute. He then said, "Well, Haley. I want you to do something for me, okay?" I nodded. "I think what you need to do is go and talk to this Peyton and Larry Sawyer. You said you think they blame you for Anne's death, but you aren't for sure. I think everything you've told me you believe is true, but you don't know for sure that you're ruining all these peoples lives. I believe that they don't blame you nor was it you who caused it. God didn't curse you, Haley. Everyone dies sometime," he finished and I was speechless.
I didn't say anything. I just stood up and walked out. I got into Brooke's car and drove back to my apartment. I closed the door and rested my back against it, closing my eyes. I heard the TV so I opened them to see Brooke and Nate staring at me. "Hi," I said and went into the kitchen before they could say anything to me. I grabbed a water bottle out of the fridge and went back out to the living room. I sat inbetween them and asked, "what are we watching?"
Brooke turned the TV off. "Nothing now. How was it? What did he say? Was he hot?"
"Brooke!" Nate exclaimed and she shrugged. "How did it go, baby?"
I sighed. "I really don't want to talk about it," I said quietly.
Nate put his arm around me. "Why not, Hales?"
"Because I don't want to," I replied and grabbed the remote from Brooke, turning on the TV.
"Will you at least answer my question, Haley?" Brooke pleaded.
I didn't look at her only said, "he was well over 50, Brooke. He wasn't hot."
"EWW! That must of been terrible for you!" she said.
I turned to her. "Actually, it was extremely terrible. He kept writing everything down, which really pissed me off cause I didn't know what he was writing. Then, I explained everything I explained to you guys and he told me to go and see Peyton and Larry again. Can you believe that?" I said, amazingly, in one breath.
"Wow. Good job, Brooke," Nate said and I just realised I didn't want to tell them, but I did.
"Just doing my job, Nate. So, tutor girl, when are you gonna see the long lost family?"
I turned off the TV and stood. "I'm not."
"What? Why not? I think that would do you some good," Brooke said.
"Well, I haven't seen either of them since I was 12. 12, Brooke! I mean, 8 years is a long time! Will they even recognize me? Will they care that I came to see them? Will they even want to see me after I cursed their family? Will-"
"You didn't curse their family, Haley," Nathan said sternly. "You didn't curse anyone!"
I just shook my head. "You don't understand, Nathan! You never will! Everyone I get close to dies. I don't know why you guys want to be near me!" I exclaimed.
Brooke stood and went over to me, putting her hand on my shoulder. "Haley, you're my best friend. I'm not going anywhere and neither is Nate. You aren't cursed. Everyone's had family that has died. It was just their time, Hales," she said softly. "Now, why don't you really want to go?"
I remained quiet for a while. "I don't want to go alone," I replied and looked up at her.
She smiled. "Is that all? Tutor girl, you have a great boyfriend who would love to go with you and support you. Isn't that right, superstar?" she asked.
I turned to face Nathan who walked over to me, taking me into his arms. "I want to go, Hales, if you want me there," he said and put his forehead on mine.
I sighed. "I'll only go if you go with me, Nate," I replied and then kissed him softly.
"Awww, how cute! I seriously wish I had a camera right now!" Brooke said and I laughed.
"So, I'll see where they're living and hopefully we'll go in a few days or so," I said to Nathan who nodded.
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