A/N: Hello everyone! It's officially summer break and I have come back with a vengeance! Some of you may have been wondering why this chapter had taken so long to come out, well it's because the week before this one it was my finals week in college. As much as I love writing, in the end it's just a hobby, not a career. Also if I fail and repeat a year level I'd likely never be allowed near a computer unless it was for schoolwork for a whole year. Anyway another reason this chapter took especially long is because its also the longest chapter of SWF to date. I wasn't really sure where I could cut Whiskey Peak for parts so I just did the whole section right here. Little Garden probably will be in segments though so those shouldn't take a whole month…although they still might since my family tends to schedule things on the fly and thus I make no promises about when chapters come out. I do, however, promise to post at least one chapter a month. Whether that chapter would be one that progresses the story or a bundle of shorts, you'll just have to wait and see. Yes, there are going to be chapters sprinkled in maybe every now and again containing shorts or omakes. Feel free to comment ideas for omakes and if my friend and I like it we'll see what we can do with it. Now with that out of the way, enjoy the chapter!
WHISKEY PEAK
The Princess, The Wolf, and The Demoness
The sky was blue, the birds flew, and the Sea Kings ruled the seas uncontested with the exception of the monsters roaming the New World. Emphasis on the terms monster and New World. The bodies of two 20 meter long Sea Kings being chained to the Merry with their spines severed at the point it met their skull went against this simple fundamental fact of life. So otherworldly the sight was that Princess Nefertari Vivi of Alabasta, a woman who lived her entire life on the Grand Line with all its insanity was left staring off into the sky wondering when was the last time her life made any monecrum of sense.
Mr. 9, her partner however, was much more flexible…if only for the fact that his aid in securing the Sea King carcasses subsequently ensured he himself would be able to finally feast upon the delicacy so few had the chance to enjoy. The sheer price of these things, even with the easier to kill and, or, less flavorful varieties was murder on anyone's wallets. To not only have the chance of eating a Sea King for free but also a Sea King of what was hailed to be the Wagyu Beef of Sea King meats…Well, when it was put in that light Vivi was a tad less inclined to smack the orange haired man up the head.
Vivi's gazing off into the distance was broken by the cries of pain from the man who'd killed the Sea Kings in the first place. The orange haired woman, Nami, the navigator of the Straw Hats, was outright throttling her captain like he was nothing more than a ragdoll alongside a long string of simultaneously inspiring yet terrifying promises of pain.
"You hear me, Monkey D. Luffy! You pull shit like this again and I will follow through on those promises! This, I swear!" The wolfman in question had his eyes closed the whole time, the crew and their guests had assumed it was out of fear. Luffy was obviously stronger but even that strength seemed to wilt under the navigator's ire. The enraged woman knew better though, and her expression darkened as the sound of snoring reached everyone's ears. Monkey D. Luffy…had fallen asleep.
"I can't tell whether to be impressed with Luffy or disappointed." Zoro said to his fellow male Straw Hats and one Mr. 9 as they secured the Sea Kings to each of Merry's sides. "Your stance is pretty obvious, shitty cook, so you can keep your chivalry crap to yourself. I'm more curious about their opinions."
"Listen here you little-"
"We're going with, being impressed but more out of his stupidity." Mr. 9 cut in before the blonde cook decided to go into a screaming match while he was right between the two monsters. With a smirk, the eccentric man turned to the only Straw Hat in his weight class. "Any objections, Tengu?"
Usopp promptly corrected Mr. 9's misconceptions about him by not so subtly flinging the orange head straight off the Going Merry…and into the night sky as a twinkling little star. The whole ship went quiet as Usopp gave them all a death glare followed by a growl. "Anyone else going to call me a tengu?"
No one moved, and after nodding smugly to himself with a grin, Usopp got up-
"""Tengu.""" And froze as three voices rang out the words that caused his left eye to begin twitching like crazy. The marksman's irritation stemmed more from the ones who had called him that accursed name, rather than actually referring to him by it. It certainly did not help that the monster trio all collectively eyeballed the marksman daringly, challenging him to do something.
Alas, "You bastards couldn't let me get one win in." The marksman huffed just as a certain green clothed man plummeted back into the sea ahead of them a few minutes away. "Whatever, I'll grab a lifeline for 9."
Vivi took a few moments to gather herself…then promptly slumped forward in defeat. The fate of her kingdom, her home, rested on the shoulders of idiots. Nami was the least offensive of the bunch but the sad truth was she was low in the hierarchy of influence brought about through having the power to back it up. The actual monsters of the crew consisted of a drunkard swordsman who, while tolerable so far, was only such due to the fact he didn't directly interact much with Vivi…or anyone for that matter. The memory of Usopp having to run below deck just to get him to stop doing whatever it was he was doing down there and make sure they survived the Grand Line was still fresh and aggravating. The cook was equal parts infuriating and charming…and for the life of her, Vivi swore that there was something about his mannerisms and features that tickled the back of her mind.
Shaking her head dismissively, Vivi concluded that in the end Sanji wouldn't directly harm women and while he could pull off some seemingly reality breaking shenanigans to get around his code, he still put himself at a disadvantage. With a deep and tired sigh, Vivi turned her eyes to the strongest of the monsters and arguably the biggest source of her current migraine. Monkey D. Luffy, a name that seemed a tad familiar but like with Sanji, Vivi couldn't decipher why, the son of Emperor of the Sea, Red Hair Shanks…and resident numbskull.
"My kingdom's future is on the shoulders of a man-child." Vivi moaned mournfully with her face in her hands. Having heard what the royal said, Nami, who was already prepared to knock said man-child out, rose up and fixed the princess with a very familiar look and despite being of similar build, right down to the hourglass figures, the princess felt like she hadn't a chance in hell against the other woman. "Ah. My apologies, Nami. It's just that-"
"That what?" Nami had a dangerous edge to her voice as she stalked ever closer to the nervous royal. "Don't forget your place, your highness." Nami practically hissed venomously. "You need our help. Actually scratch that, you need any and I mean any help you can get right now so don't-"
The navigator who'd been inches away from getting in the blue haired woman's face found her ramping tirade brought to a halt when a familiar pair of arms circled around her hips. "That's enough, love." A husky voice whispered into her ear, the man's lips not even an inch away, his cool breath tickling her, sending shivers down her spine. Nami glanced to her shoulder where Luffy had planted his chin as he gazed at her with half-lidded eyes. God how much she both hated and loved those eyes. "We haven't gotten any sleep since LogueTown and we certainly haven't been giving the princess the best of first impressions. Her skepticism is to be accepted. Let it go."
Vivi hadn't been able to hear what the wolfman had said but the position he'd placed himself in with the navigator made their relationship very clear. The princess filed that piece of information in for later, perhaps her interactions with the navigator shouldn't escalate like they had today. "I apologize for my comments. It…it's been a long day."
Nami turned her attention back to the princess and just stared for a few moments before sighing and walking away, briefly whispering something to the wolfman who only nodded in response with a raised brow. Once the navigator left the deck and closed the door to her room behind her, Luffy addressed the princess. "A man-child huh?" The princess blushed briefly for being called out and promptly moved to correct herself but Luffy waved her off before she could. "Ah, it's fine. You aren't exactly wrong in describing me for the past few hours anyway."
"But let's get something straight right here, right now princess." Vivi stiffened as she opened her eyes to see the pirate captain towering over her with a smile that wasn't the least bit friendly or comforting. Unlike his previous demeanor of being a cheeky brat, his current expression reminded her painfully of a certain other pirate, specifically the one currently making her home a warzone. "The reason I took this job isn't for fame or the love of the people. No, I couldn't care less about being seen as a hero." Vivi gulped nervously as the wolfman seemed to become downright sadistic, his smile unsettlingly like yet another pirate, one who roamed the New World and ran a kingdom of his own with…nothing less than gut-wrenching and horrifying standards. The princess began to fear that she'd doomed her country with an even worse monster but his next words gave her pause. "I took this job to deal with that phony calling himself a pirate. A coward who fled from life on the seas to take over a kingdom? Not only is Leatherface going against what a real pirate should be and strive for, he's setting a shitty standard for future pirates as well."
The princess looked at the wolfman who only moments prior seemed just about ready to rip her into pieces before pulling a complete 180 and started giving her a friendly smile. "My girl will definitely be charging you for the dry fuck's execution though. Hope there are no problems on that front." That was all Luffy had to say before he left Vivi there to process the past few minutes of dialogue where she couldn't even get a word in and walked over to his crew. "Sanji, think you can make a dish out of a rough description?"
'I can't tell what's worse. The fact that I just now realized I hired a psychopath or the fact that he's slowly becoming more my type…Why are the hot ones always crazy. Oh gods above, what am I thinking?!' Vivi's inner monologue was accompanied by her blatant blushing face as she walked to the side of the ship opposite of the Straw Hats. The princess shook her head as she reached the railings to clear her mind. Now wasn't the time to daydream over very clear downright stupid mistakes, night was coming soon and having heard about how long it's been since the Straw Hat's actually slept, Vivi wouldn't have time to waste if she wanted to get the finer details sorted out with the Captain and his crew. 'Crocodile may be an arrogant prick but he's certainly no fool. If the Unluckies sniffed me out there's a good chance that witch has as well. The Unluckies seem to be in league with the Straw Hats through a mutual benefactor…but who?' A flashing memory of a raven haired beauty appeared in the princess's mind but she dismissed the notion immediately. That woman…whatever her goals were, aiding her kingdom wasn't part of it. Vivi turned slightly green as more memories flooded her mind. Memories of the corpses that woman left in her wake, some were granted the mercy of swift spine cracking deaths but others had been mangled beyond recognition at times. The worst part was the ones that were the most mangled tended to be the ones who were actually decent people. For as sick and twisted as Luffy made himself out to be in their earlier encounter he wasn't without a conscience. Frankly, she wasn't sure why the man had acted the way he did back there…perhaps his crew wasn't the only one being affected by the lack of sleep. Compared to their earlier interactions back on the Twin Capes, Luffy was a lot more..unhinged so to speak, so Vivi was giving him the benefit of the doubt on that one. Miss All Sunday however, had no such redeeming qualities. The woman was a menace, a murderer, a disease down to her very core. Gritting her teeth and clenching her first tightly against the railing, Princess Nefetari Vivi released a pulse. The pulse went unnoticed by any on board except for the wolfman who, even as his mind became far less coherent, was still capable of assessing those around him with razor sharp acuity, especially when it came to those with the potential to become allies…or threats.
From his spot on the kitchen doorway Luffy glanced at Vivi at the corner of his eye in intrigue. 'Another ruler, eh? Will you be a conqueror or a king?'
After having finished consuming yet another mouth watering meal, the cook had been able to replicate the dish, Boeuf Bourguignon was what it was called but Luffy couldn't pronounce it for the life of him, through the wolfman's vague description, Luffy stretched outwardly with a long and tired yawn, smacking his lips as he reached for the door to his bedroom to finally get some shut eye. Devil Fruit user or not, sleep was still an integral part of maintaining brain functions. Of course, all of the wolfman's brain functions went right out the window when he came face to face with his very…eager wife. Luffy couldn't care less of the consequences of what he was about to do after he saw Nami. He doubted even Nami cared, seeing as the navigator made no mention of their uninvited guest's presence. If anything, the orange haired woman seemed even more enticed with their nightly activities thanks to the little audience she knew was having its own fun right out of her and Luffy's quarters.
"You really don't care, love? I would have expected you to have gone out and dealt with her especially since you two were essentially at each other's throats." The woman who would be queen shivered under her master's husky voice and powerful frame as he indulged himself in her to his heart's content. She was his, completely and ultimately, after all. "Or perhaps you'd prefer that I break her as well?"
The navigator captured her lover's lips in a searing kiss before responding with a sultry gaze, "Come, come now my king. The time isn't right just yet." Nami reveled in her wolf's growing haste to bring them to victory. The fact she hadn't refused the inclusion of the little perv outside seemed to have lit a fire in her precious love's heart. "When the time comes…You'll break her and me…into submission."
"You seem to forget, bitch." Luffy laughed at his wife's naivety before pulling her hair roughly towards him, the pain causing the woman more pleasure that injury, evident by her tongue lolling out erotically. "You are already mine."
A royal is taught many things as they grow up, one of them was how to secure relationships with potential allies. One of the most important factors in endeavors such as these succeeding however was that the royal was to be of sound mind throughout the whole process. Vivi was very much not of sound mind after she woke up and recalled what she'd bore witness to the night prior. The young woman laid in her bed with a steaming blush as she recalled her shameful acts that would have more than likely put her initial goal to ruins. "Gods above, I'm pathetic." The princess buried her face in her pillow with a groan only to snap her head up when she realized she wasn't alone in her quarters.
"I'd say you were just wound up, your majesty, and in need of…release." Vivi slowly looked to her left where the woman who'd been a very…ahem inspiring, aspect of last night's activities smiled at her cattily. Nami practically purred as she walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed, uncaring of the incredulous gaze the royal was sending her way. "My husband ate a carnivorous zoan fruit, my dear. We both knew you were enjoying the show."
"Oh God." Mortification. That would be the one word that perfectly described how the princess felt in that moment under the navigator's amused gaze. If there was any silver lining at all in this situation it was that the navigator seemed a lot more approachable but there was also the chance this was just her getting ready to pounce. "What do you want, Miss Navigator? And I do hope you've been checking the eternal pose frequently." Vivi's eyes while hardened were also twinged with concern. The Grand Line was an unforgiving sea, one wrong move and it was curtains for them all.
Nami's amusement sobered up into an annoyed look the navigator directed out the window where snow continued to fall. "I have. You and 9 weren't joking about this sea's unpredictability. Even just by following the Eternal Pose we've been bombarded with weather after weather." As if on cue, the snow storm abruptly shifted to howling winds and rumbling thunder. "I honestly shudder to imagine what hell we'd run into if we deviated from the pose."
With a sigh, Nami returned her attention back to Vivi but with a softer look in her eyes. "After you left, Luffy put some things to light for me. I shouldn't have gotten on your case yesterday…Well, insult my family again and I'll do it again in a heartbeat but I'll be more lenient." A dark, haunted look appeared in the navigator's eyes, one that gave the royal pause. It was a look the young bluenette had become familiar with over the course of her infiltration in Baroque Works. "I know what it's like to have your home oppressed after all. It takes a toll on you, pushes you to do things you never thought you'd do…changes you into something you never wished you became."
"You…You also dealt with a tyrant, it seems." Vivi finally said after the two had descended into silence. Nami gave a hollow laugh and her eyes brimmed with simmering rage. Memories of Arlong's camaraderie flowing through her like a raging river, the surging tide of leaving the navigator in a very foul mood.
"Yeah. For 10 years my home was under that bastard's tyranny." Vivi choked and stiffened when Nami dropped the duration of which her own oppression lasted. 10 years? God just imagining herself in the navigator's boots sent the princess into a spiraling depression. "He killed my mother on the first day he took over my home, you know. Right in front of me and my sister too." On the first day? If she had memories of her home's tyrant then…then there was a good chance she was still a child. Nami wasn't that much older than Vivi herself. That realization just made the princess sick to her stomach. "Lived most of my life under his thumb, looting and stealing money to buy my village back from him…and then I met Luffy. Crazy wolfy bastard practically appeared out of nowhere on one of my runs and did the least pirate-like thing."
"What did he do?" Vivi asked a little curious but more eager to shift topics from the older woman's darker past. A past that the princess hoped never became her future.
"Took in a poor guy who was forced into piracy and brought him to the marines…To become a marine." Nami laughed at the royal's dumbstruck expression before continuing on. "The poor bloke's name was Coby. Good kid, a little naive but a good kid. Luffy took pity on him so he pulled a few strings to get Coby in the marines…after dealing with the corrupt captain running Shell's Town that is."
"A pirate was able to pull strings with the marines?" Nami blinked in surprise before raising a brow and smirking at the lost royal. Vivi narrowed her eyes at the look she was receiving, "What? It's not like you and your crew have been active for very long. 9 and I also weren't able to get a News Coo in a while."
"No, but shouldn't the name, Monkey D. ring a bell for you?" The Albastan took a few moments to consider the navigator's words. The secret behind Luffy's pull with the government had something to do with his family, presumably his father's side. So who was a well known, male, marine with the name of Monkey…D…wait a minute. "Hehehe, figure it out yet, princess?"
"You're boyfriend…is related to the Monkey D. Garp?! The hero of the marines?!" Nami had been giggling earlier but the fact that Vivi shot out of the bed so quickly that she fell on the floor had her laughing without a care. "Why would he be a pirate then?! It doesn't…wait Red Hair Shanks isn't-"
"Shanks isn't Luffy's biological father." Nami cut in and clarified for the princess before wincing. "Luffy's biological father…Garp's son…Well, let's just say that going around saying he was Shank's kid is a much less dangerous choice than admitting he was related to that man." Vivi looked questioningly at Nami, clearly wanting the navigator to spill but the orangette wasn't willing to go into further detail…at least not without a price. "Join Luffy and I sometime and maybe you'll find out who the baby daddy is."
Vivi's beet red blush and incoherent stammering led to another chorus of laughter from the navigator who just patted the bluenette placatingly. "I don't mind sharing Luffy…Actually no I do mind a tad bit, but you're fun and more importantly…hehe I think I'll keep that last qualifier to myself." Having said her piece, Nami moved to exit the room and leave Vivi to her thoughts only for the princess to quickly place herself between the navigator and the door. "You need something, your highness?"
A million and one things were running through Vivi's mind at the moment but she decided to focus on the ones that actually mattered for now. The…offers she was being given could be put under consideration later. God help her, she was actually willing to consider such things. 'No! Focus, Vivi! Stop thinking about-gagh! No, don't picture him! Think of Alabasta! Think of your people!' Whilst the royal was having an internal war with herself to get her shit together, Nami's expression darkened as she snapped her attention to the window. It had gotten still outside, no thunder, no rain, nothing…She didn't like that.
"Vivi, whatever it is you have to say it can wait. The weather outside's become too quiet to be normal." Nami went around Vivi and quickly ran out the door only to have her wrist caught by the princess who looked like she finally got her shit together.
"A man with long white hair that ends in curls is waiting for me on Whiskey Peak alongside my partner Carue. Raise whatever hell you may need to on the island but keep those two out of harm's way. They joined me in infiltrating Baroque Works."
At the beginning of Vivi's request Nami's face had been anxious for whatever hell the crew may have found themselves in but now that she was out and about…she could feel it. The sand in the breeze, the distinct dryness of the air…they arrived. "How about you and 9 go tell your partners yourself. We're here, Vivi." Bringing the royal along with her, the navigator and the princess found themselves on the deck of the Going Merry with Usopp up in the crow's nest, Sanji by the kitchen door, 9 and Zoro overlooking the sea before them at the front, and Luffy atop the cute, ram's figurehead. "Whiskey Peak."
Luffy could feel his eye twitching as the spectacle before him took place. The rest of the Straw Hats hadn't been any different as they were all left in similar states of incredulity watching the people before them. 'Someone should get these people medals.'
"Welcome! Welcome! Come, Pirates! It's time to party!"
"Pirates! Welcome to our town!"
"Heroes of the Sea! Disembark and party with 1000 Mugs Mark!"
Usopp cast a questioning glance to Luffy, "Captain, these people are either being genuine or they are the best actors I have ever seen." The wolfman spared his marksman a glance before shifting his gaze to Nami. The navigator, unlike the rest of the crew, began sporting a cheery smile on her face as her eyes snapped to various buildings seemingly at random. "Luffy? You there, man?"
"Usopp, I believe Nami has a job for you…And yes these people are pretty damn good actors." Luffy gave the long nosed man another contemplating look, as if trying to weigh the pros and cons of a business transaction before shrugging and giving his wife a nudge to get her attention. "When you've figured out where all your new treasures are located just give the list to Ussop and Sanji."
Having been mentioned, Sanji turned away from the swooning ladies to speak to the captain. "Not that I have a problem with that but why include Usopp for an infiltration mission?" The marksman looked ready to argue that he was perfectly capable of performing infiltration missions but the cook wasn't done. "Doesn't really make sense for a proud warrior to be sneaking around in the shadows to deal with his foes."
Luffy nodded along to the chef's comments about Usopp's mission clashing with his goals, "All true but in the end, when it comes time to clash it will be up to Usopp if he wants to stab them in the back like an assassin or fight them honorably like a warrior. The main reason I chose Usopp for this mission though is that between one on one fights or one against groups of 5 at least, I don't see our tengu having much luck in the latter." While Usopp bristled a tad at being called a tengu, again, he couldn't argue against Luffy's words. It wouldn't be until much later that Usopp would at least have a decent chance in fighting off multiple enemies or at least until he had the finished version of his dad's suggested addition. "It should go without saying, but I expect you to also test out that custom wristbow of yours during the looting."
Usopp paused a bit, wondering if Luffy was secretly also telepathic, before nodding along fervently. "Y-Yeah, I will. Hopefully I'll get some insight on how else I could apply this thing."
"Or what other modifications you can make. Speaking of which, mind handing me the prototype clima-tact?" Nami and Usopp walked off towards the man's workshop to grab said item, as well as a few magazines for the marksman as well.
Zoro, who'd kept his silence all the while, turned to Luffy with a frown. "Luffy, don't get me wrong, I'm all for fighting but none of these grunts look particularly-"
"I smell smoked meats and alcohol by the gallons, by that restaurant they're setting up over there." The swordsman promptly shut up, and discreetly walked closer to the edge of the Merry before shooting Luffy an anxious look. "...Ah fuck it, it's a party, go wild."
Zoro grinned widely and did a quick fist pump in victory while the wolfman shook his head in amusement. Nami and Usopp, made their way back to the deck with the addition of a collapsible staff attached to the navigator's belt and a multitude of different magazines on the marksman's custom ammo belt worn across his chest. "Remember Nami, you only get about 3 maximum powered shots before that thing goes volatile. I fine tuned it enough that it could still be used as a staff before those three charges are used but after that, just toss it like a spear." Usopp warned with a nervous look in his eyes, one that was shared surprisingly by Luffy of all people. The wolfman shuddered as he recalled the last time he entered the marksman's room without knocking, fun fact about lightning…it didn't taste great.
"Yeah, I'll remember to keep that in mind…Though like a spear huh?" Nami patted the prototype clima-tact with a far off look. Knowing what that look usually entailed, Usopp quickly began pondering how he could go about adjusting the clima-tact to be a lot more pointy and sharp rather than blunt. "I think I know how else you can upgrade the final product."
"Wel- cough cough- Ma Ma Maaaaa! Ahem. Welcome." A tall man with a tiny red nose and blonde hair styled like a powdered wig greeted the Straw Hats who'd finally made it to the strange island's port. An island reminiscent of a desert with…really really big round cactuses. "My name is Igarappoi, the mayor of Whiskey Peak."
Luffy took note of the man's hair and build, sharing a subtle glance and nod with Nami who confirmed the man's true identity, before putting his hand out to 'Iggarapoi' for a handshake. "Monkey D. Luffy, Captain of the Straw Hat Pirates." A ripple seemed to go through the crowd as the identity of the pirates came to light, some briefly had fear take root in their eyes before their act was put back up in full swing. "A couple of friends of yours, Wednesday and 9 mentioned being bounty hunters who took a hunting job from here. We bagged a Sea King the other day if you're interested." Luffy stated, nonchalantly gesturing to the decapitated Sea King strapped to the Going Merry's side. Another round of anxiousness rippled through the crowd as they recognized what breed it was. Tasty though it was known to be, its ferociousness was even more infamous.
"Wonderful." Iggarapoi took the information in stride, likely already having been informed by Vivi of the next plan of action. "Whiskey Peak is a town that thrives on making liquor and music and we pride ourselves on our hospitality. As for our liquor, well it's as bountiful as the seawater itself. In exchange for the Sea King, would you be interested in a party? Free of charge of course?"
"Now, you're speaking my language pops. We'll take you up on the offer, and even throw in tales of our adventure thus far." Nami butted in with an easy smile that was overshadowed by the hard look she cast to the rest of the crew, namely the swordsman who seemed to get lost in thought over all the alcohol that was likely to be drunk. "On a different topic, how long does it take for a logpose to be set on this island?"
"Logpose? Oh, you'll not have to worry about that by tomorrow morning." Iggarapoi said ambiguously, while the people of Whiskey Peak seemed to grin evilly for a moment, the Straw Hat's navigator just smiled thankfully at the response. "Now without further ado, let the party begin!"
The whole island was in cheer as the party began, all the stops were pulled, food and drink was plentiful and the people all danced, laughed, and ate to their heart's content. Unaware of the battle that would take place only a few hours after nightfall. From their spot atop one of the highest points on Whiskey Peak, the Unluckies, Vivi and Mr. 9 watched the festivities proceeding.
"I'm honestly surprised that you haven't been going against this plan or the revelations of my true identity so far, Mr. 9." Vivi commented honestly to her former partner in crime who just stared down into the valley, his eyes trained on a muscular woman with dark skin and short red hair. "Any reason for that in particular?"
The orange haired man continued to quietly stare off in the distance before sighing out a response, "Not really a hard decision to make, your majesty." The man turned to his former partner with a soft smile, the kind shared between old friends, "Even if you turned out to be an infiltrator, you can't deny that we didn't have some fun in our time working together. You cannot tell me you didn't genuinely enjoy putting some of the scum we encountered through the ringer?"
Vivi responded with a light chuckle, "I honestly can't. Remember the slime room fiasco?"
"What about the Mud Slider Disaster?"
"Oh don't get me started, 9. That swine definitely got what he had coming to him. No humiliation was more well deserved than what that fat pig got."
Mr. 9 let out a bark of laughter while the Unluckies gave the pair amused smiles. The otter and vulture had borne witness to a lot of those events actually, the Mud Slider Disaster was certainly one mission to be remembered. "Aye. I may not have a lot to be proud of in this life but putting that fuck behind bars is one of the highlights."
"Hehe, don't sell yourself short, 9. Eccentrics and bad fashion sense aside, you're a pretty good guy." Vivi gave the older man a friendly sock to the shoulder, to which the man played along with an exaggerated pout and rubbing of the punched area. The mood sobered a bit with the wistful smile that came to rest on the royal's face. "I hope you have a good life after his whole ordeal comes to an end, 9."
The man didn't miss a beat, "I hope the same for you and your kingdom as well, Vivi."
Vivi gave the man a grateful smile before her face scrunched up, "Say…what's your real name anyway? You know mine, so tell me yours, partner."
Mr. 9 rolled his eyes good naturedly but responded nonetheless. "Nein."
Vivi raised a brow briefly at his choice of words to deny her before shaking her head with the smile back on her face. "Well, I suppose it's probably best if you keep it a secret. I know better than anyone how dangerous it is to be advertising their real name after all." The Unluckies both nodded in agreement with the princess's statement. Anonymity was a very important part of their profession after all. The orange haired man however, did not share their smile but instead gave them a confused stare.
"My name is Nein. Nein Chlorinson." Silence greeted his revelation…and then,
"What?" Vivi asked with an uncomprehending look.
"What?" Nein asked with much confusion and little heat. What was wrong with his name? It was a wonderful name his mother had given to him!
Scribble~ Scribble~
'What?' The otter asked with his whiteboard, both he and his vulture partner questioned in incredulity.
Sanji honestly wasn't sure what to do with himself. To have a veritable harem of women hanging on to his very word, all eager to give him their undivided attention, truly a troublesome situation for any man to find themselves in. So what did he do? Well, the knowledge that these women were really just trying to trick him so they could get to his crew pretty much killed the mood. He loved women, don't get him wrong, but even he had standards and barriers to whom he'd actively pursue romantically or platonically with. However, thoughts of how in the future, many would take into reference how he acted here and perhaps everywhere else women would be used against him…Alas, being a skirt chaser was the only option it seemed. Yes, that was it. The only option, it wasn't like he was actually enjoying the company.
Zoro gave the pervy cook an unimpressed look as he downed his 10th glass of Whiskey Peak's Prime Wine. Nami had roped him into participating in the drinking competition for the grand prize of 100,000 Berries which was what led to him having another mug of wine filled up in front of him as the young navigator was on her 13th. 'For all of Luffy's concerns over my drinking, I think he should have paid more attention to Nami.' The swordsman sweatdropped when, as soon as someone tried to overtake her lead, she downed 5 more consecutive mugs like they were nothing! 'God almighty woman, how tough is your liver?!'
"And so there I was, in the midst of a great battle against an officer of the Arlong Pirates, a fishman of a thousand battles on the waters that bordered the New World…" Luffy tuned out the rest of Usopp's greatly exaggerated retelling of his battle with Chew. The wolfman would have been disappointed in the marksman for lying about how much more over the top the battle had apparently been but since the long nosed man was giving his fallen opponent just as much of an exaggeration…Well, Luffy supposed he could let it go without comment this time. Turning his attention back to the meal he'd just been served, Luffy's cold indifference put many of the cooks who'd dared to serve the captain of the Straw Hat Pirates on edge. Before the wolfman were three dishes, one from each brave and confident chef, Peking Duck, Tantanmen Beef Ramen, and Lobster Risotto. All three chef's gulped nervously as the wolfman quietly sampled each dish, taking in the flavor, the texture, the aromatics, and especially the presentation. Putting down his spoon, having tasted the Lobster Risotto last, Luffy leaned back against his chair and closed his eyes to deliberate over the dishes.
"The duck was cooked perfectly, not too dry or overly rich in flavor. If I had to nitpick, the sauce would have been better utilized for a beautiful presentation had it been dashed across the plate, and the proportions of the duck here are far too generous for my liking. That is to say, while the dish is delicious and worth eating to the last bite even with this much meat, I doubt any restaurant could stay afloat without charging ludicrous amounts for it. 8/10." The chef who'd cooked the duck cursed himself for the oversight. He'd heard that the captain of the Straw Hats was not only a foodie but one with a nearly insatiable stomach so he'd made his dish have generous portions in exchange for not paying much mind to the presentation. Oh what a fool he was, how could he forget that even before tasting the food, the visual presentation would already leave a lasting impression. "Now for the Tantanmen Ramen." The chef who'd made this dish stood a little straighter and while a bead of sweat did make its way down his face, that was the only sign that he was in any way nervous. "Absolutely smashing." The chef breathed a sigh of relief and smiled happily as the people who'd come to watch the critiquing cheered. "Everything is right about that, the intensity of the spice, the tenderness and juiciness of the meat, the right amount of veg to go along with it, the aroma that just draws you in, and the presentation, especially, with that innovative fried egg yolk that splits, and runs down into the noodles, absolutely smashing. 10/10. Thank you very much." Luffy then stood up, and shook the chef's hand with a nostalgic smile. "Ramen has a special place in my heart and my brothers. If we ever have the time, we'll swing by here to grab a couple of bowls, you have my word." The chef had never been so happy in his life that they were actually letting millions of Berris walk out the door scot free. This pirate was good in his books, reading about him on the paper was one thing but actually being next to him? If he hadn't already thought that this was a marine acting as an undercover pirate, he certainly thought so now. "Unfortunately, for all the praise I've given the Tantanmen Ramen and Peking Roasted Duck…The Lobster Risotto has left much to be desired." The last chef, the one who'd made the dish, froze in his place, as the crowd around them fell to silence. The chef had hailed from the North Blue and trained under some of the best chefs of the region before coming to join the bounty hunter's life, what could he have done that left the wolfman disappointed? "Did you taste the dish before sending it to me?"
The chef, flustered, couldn't even answer verbally and just shook his head sideways. The man's fellow chefs stilled in realization before shaking their heads, such a rookie mistake had been made. One that the wolfman sighed over as he pushed the Lobster Risotto over to the chef, who promptly took a spoon to taste it…and found himself frowning as he was left chewing on not only bland risotto but overcooked lobster. The crustacean had practically become rubber! It was inedible! Or well that's an over exaggeration, it was still very much safe to eat…just not a dish fit for a critique. Crestfallen, the chef moved to remove the dish only for the pirate to take it up, and eat every morsel on the plate without hesitation. "The food is certainly bland, the lobster cooked to shit…but flavors and textures aside you nailed the presentation and aroma." Having finished the plate, Luffy returned to his seat to consume the better dishes of the bunch, not once turning to see that the chef who'd prepared the Risotto had a fire blazing in his eyes once more. The fire, the passion to learn from his mistakes and strive to do better the next time. "Risotto isn't a dish that holds special importance to me…but I'd be a fool to let good talent rot. Refine your skills, learn from your mistakes, and when I return, I expect nothing less than your finest work yet."
The chef was shaking in his boots at this point, tears had run down his face and fallen to the floorboards below, but quickly wiping them away, the chef faced Luffy with grim determination, "It won't be cheap or free."
"Then I trust it will be worth every berry." Luffy replied not even a second later. Far from the wolfman's table, Iggarapoi chuckled to himself. The man had been skeptical over Vivi's plans when he'd first heard them but after seeing how the pirates had acted throughout the night, perhaps the fate of Alabasta was safe in their hands after all. Walking out the door, Iggarapoi was surprised to find his partner, a dark skinned woman with cherry pink hair held up in short pigtails, glaring at him on the side of the building.
"Problem, Miss Monday?" Iggarapoi questioned, closing the door behind him where the bounty hunters actually began to genuinely enjoy the company of the Straw Hat Pirates. "Have Miss Wednesday and Mr. 9 returned yet?"
"Yeah. I saw them heading over to the shed where that overgrown duck sleeps." Iggarapoi tensed momentarily over the woman's tone over the animal before relaxing just as quickly, as if he had never tense at all. "I'm glad they brought food back for us, especially a Sea King that'll be big enough to last the whole town a month at the very least but…"
"But what Miss Monday? Do you wish to try your luck against the Straw Hat Pirates? You have seen their bounties, yes? Their Captain alone is nearly worth what the Warlord in Alabasta was before his bounty was frozen and even if years have passed since it's been updated, Desert King Sir Crocodile is far, far above our weight class." The woman flinched under her designated partner, Mr. 8's harsh tone and challenging eyes. The man wasn't known for being snippy with his colleagues unless he was under great amounts of stress, Miss Monday felt a bit guilty for adding on to his troubles with her own pettiness. 8 appeared to notice her guilt and sighed as he rubbed his eyes to drive away the weariness, "Apologies for losing me- cough cough- Ma Ma Maaaaa! Ahem, my temper, Miss Monday. Many things that could go wrong right now lead to consequences I shudder to think about."
Whilst Miss Monday could tell Mr. 8 was telling the truth, she was misguided on what consequences he was speaking off. "Yeah, we screw with them then this island might end up getting leveled to the ground." Iggarapoi had no issues with keeping his partner in the dark, after all, come morning, he, the princess and the Straw Hats will have vacated the island already, no sense in dragging the kind woman, deep down anyway, into his kingdom's mess. "Still though, aside from being monsters in terms of strength, their cast iron livers are equally absurd."
"A decade of being a slave in all but name does tend to drive you into a bar a lot." Miss Monday and Mr. 8 snapped their attention to the roofs where the navigator of the Straw Hats, the orange haired Nami, was smiling down at them, the infamous swordsman Pirate Hunter Zoro on her left casually tending to his blades, and their captain, Straw Hat Monkey D. Luffy snacking on a bright red apple on her right. "Your wine was pretty good by the way, but I've had better."
Iggarapoi stared up at the Straw Hats in confusion, this wasn't part of the plan, they were supposed to keep quiet until everyone had fallen asleep. Why were they deviating from the agreed course of events?
While Mr. 8 was silently pondering over the Straw Hats motivations for flipping the script, Miss Monday was more focused on how the bastards were awake, and specifically how they managed to get out of the room without anyone noticing! The answer soon came in the form of two grunts rushing out screaming, "The Straw Hats have escaped! They were never drunk!"
"Of course we weren't. We may be rookies, but we're far from incompetent." Zoro scoffed, inspecting his blades with extreme diligence, it would simply not do for his blades to not be at their best possible state prior to a battle. "Besides, any drinker worth their salt would recognize even the slightest shift of alcohol content in their drinks." While the bounty hunters down below grimaced over the rather simple, and thus even more infuriating, explanation over how the pirates had gotten past being put out of commission, Luffy just settled a very unamused look at his Vice Captain.
"All that statement did was decrease the chances of your drinking ban from being lifted." Zoro flinched under the reminder of being banned from drinking after his drinking spree earlier, before settling a dark glare on the people below. People quickly began to curse the swordsman internally for deciding to take out his anger on them. Their anger shifted to the wolfman after Luffy said next, "Feel free to work out all your frustrations on the poor blokes down below. Just make sure the chefs are spared. I wasn't joking about coming back here for a meal later on." The three chefs let out sighs of relief after realizing they'd be spared…only to stiffen up at the evil looks they were being subjected to by their colleagues. "Ah…Probably shouldn't have advertised that."
"Wait please!" Miss Monday called out to them, holding her arms out before her in a placating manner, as if she were approaching beasts rather than other humans. She wasn't that far off all things considered. "We may be bounty hunters that have dealt with pirates before but we have no plans on doing what we did to them, to you! Perhaps, just this once, we can both just turn away from this and-"
"Hang on, all of you guys are bounty hunters?" Luffy asked in 'genuine' surprise, "We're just going to go easy on all you to see how we fared against Grand Line natives but if y'all are bounty hunters…Well this just became a fight based on the matter of principle alone." Now it was Miss Monday who was subjected to evil looks from her peers. "And since you guys are bounty hunters, then that means you all know how to fight! We don't need to hold back!" Luffy concluded with a fist slammed down into an open palm with his best 'Monkey D. Garp figures out a loophole to one of Sengoku's orders' impression. As the wolfman internally thanked his grandfather for being to forthcoming in how eager he was to piss of his commanding officer and best friend, outwardly Luffy laughed over Miss Monday's despairing face that epitomizes that saying, 'And that's when they knew…they fucked up.'
With a wicked grin settled on her face, Nami quickly brought out her clima-tact prototype and started releasing bubbles, hot and cold, into the sky. Despite the situation, the people below were caught up on the fact that a woman was trying to beat them…with bubbles. Some were amused, others were thankful, but the majority were outraged. "What do you take us for you skank?!"
"Barbeque." The navigator's sadistic purr was quickly followed by the world turning black and white and silenced after the deafening roar of what was arguably nature's most powerful weather based hazard, thundering lightning. Everyone within a 10 meter radius of the individuals who screamed out profanities towards Nami, who were also conveniently all clumped together from the beginning, were then covered in a black, powdery substance from head to toe after the lightshow came to an end. With a few blinks and an exhalation of black smoke, 24 of the 100 bounty hunters promptly fell face first into the dirt. The shocked looks of every bounty hunter still conscious snapped to the gleeful bundle of energy that was Nami gushing over how much she loved her new weapon, completely oblivious to the fact that even with their headsets on Luffy and Zoro were still left in a dizzy state. "Ooooh yeah~ You're definitely my baby aren't you~" Nami's cooing over her weapon was equal parts endearing and disturbing. Mainly those who had their own specialized weapons could relate whilst everyone else? Well they were the ones who felt disturbed.
Shaking off the dizziness, Luffy turned to his Vice Captain with a pained smile as his ears continued to ring, "Remind me to let Usopp figure out a way to upgrade our headphones."
"Duly noted." Zoro replied, standing up with a grunt as he stretched and drew out his three blades. Nami had taken care of nearly a quarter of them which left plenty for him to practice his new techniques against. "Also maybe save the rest of those charges for when Luffy and I are at least a bit farther from ya. These guys may be grunts but a stray sword to a vital point could still be lethal."
The navigator's cooing came to an end as she coughed into her fist, giving the swordsman a sheepish smile. "Yeah, I got a bit too excited there, hehe…" Zoro just rolled his eyes at her before seemingly vanishing into thin air. "What the?! When did Zoro learn how to shave?!" Nami turned to Luffy expecting, somewhat, for an answer only to find the wolfman blanching at an alleyway between two buildings…where they could see Zoro scratching the back of his head in confusion muttering something to himself. "Did he over-"
"He took one step." Nami snapped her gaze to her lover who looked like he'd just arrived at an existential crisis. "He took one step…and just got there! It wasn't Shave, it wasn't even the crap Sanji pulls, his sense of direction is so shit, he warped reality!"
Nami shifted uncomfortably for a moment, wondering if the roaring thunder had affected Luffy a wee bit too far, only to see that Zoro had, again, blinked out of existence then reappeared elsewhere on the battlefield where three bounty hunters suddenly had to raise their swords lest they be cut down. "How the hell did you get here?!" "This doesn't make any sense! Even for the Grand Line!" "Is it a devil fruit?!" All three men cried out at the Pirate Hunter who just blinked down at them in confusion, question marks practically manifesting above his head.
"What do you mean devil fruit? I just took two steps to the right." Zoro's deadpan answer was greeted with a cacophony of protests from everyone around him, even Luffy and Nami. "Eh, agree to disagree. I've walked the same way all my life." The swordsman said with a shrug, ignoring the next round of protests in favor of focusing on the blade the blacksmith back at Loguetown had given him free of charge. 'Let's see what you got, Yubashiri.' Unlike the past two instances where the swordsman seemed to break the laws of nature, Luffy was able to see him clearly make his way through a line of Baroque Work agents like they were nothing but butter. 'A light blade that follows its master's will, yes, you'll do nicely.' Tightening his grip on his other blade, Kitetsu III, Zoro decided to perform a flying cut, he'd managed to pull it off against Hachi but the blades he'd used weren't strong enough to come out of it unscatched. "36 Caliber Phoeni-ugh!" Both Zoro and Luffy snapped their eyes onto the cursed blade that the swordsman had acquired back on Loguetown as what was meant to only maim his opponents, quickly turned into a death sentence. With barely a second to spare, Zoro had redirected the flying slash towards one of the many buildings on Whiskey Peak instead of the crowd of bounty hunters in front of him. 'What the hell was that?! I knew this blade was cursed but I wasn't expecting it to actually go against its master's wishes!' In the brief moment where Zoro had stopped his rush, a young bounty hunter no older than a grade schooler ran with a blade held high, screaming a battle cry. Perhaps if the boy had been quiet Zoro wouldn't have deflected the strike aimed at the small of his back, nor would the young wanna-be bounty hunter be held at blade edge.
The world froze as the people of Whiskey Peak watched with bated breath. Surely, even as infamously ruthless the Pirate Hunter was made out to be, he would not harm a mere child. Before words could be exchanged between the cold swordsman and the whimpering child, a sister had run in and brought the young boy in her arms. "Lord have mercy! I beg you for mercy!" The nun cried out as she faced Zoro with a terrified face meeting the swordsman's blank one. "Lord God heavenly father, have mercy on us!" The woman whimpered along with the child…Only to sneer as they brought out a cross, and blasted Zoro with a gaseous substance. "Merciful Lord Blinding Powder!"
Slash! Slash!
"A cheap trick like that would only work with someone with a pure heart…and a guillability as bad as swirly brows pervasiveness." A cry of outrage came from the building he'd veered the flying slash off to, huh it looks like that was where Sanji was, "Honestly, I've seen pornography with better acting than this." If the slashes made with the back of his blades hadn't sent them to the ground, the direct hit to their pride might have. "So, who's next?" Zoro grinned like a demon straight out of the 7th ring of hell's innermost circle. All the bounty hunter's left standing, approximately 44 mooks excluding Iggarapoi, took a step back from the swordsman.
Iggarapoi was honestly unsure of what to do at this point, the plan to leave quietly had gone straight to hell, Vivi still hadn't made an appearance aside from being spotted by the stables where they kept her duck, and the pirates seemed to be planning on leveling the whole town to the ground for the heck of it. It was amidst his inner turmoil of frustrations that Miss Monday snapped. The Straw Hats were different? The Straw Hats were nothing less than heroes? Why were they doing this then! Yeah, they weren't the most innocent of folk, they were bounty hunters, but they didn't put down anyone who didn't deserve it, so why?! "Why won't you just leave?! You're obviously stronger so why?!"
The answer came from behind her, "Because we're pirates." That was all the dark skinned muscular woman heard before her world zoomed past her and then an explosion of pain across her entire body. Groggily, she barely retained consciousness as she looked up to see her assailant, the captain of the pirates himself, Luffy. "Of course, compared to other 'pirates' we have standards. We don't kill, we don't rape, and we don't pillage. Why are we fighting you? Because given the chance, you would most certainly be trying to cash in on our bounties, in fact some of you were even getting ready to go against your superior's orders." A few individuals flinched, knowing they'd been caught and all of them found themselves on the receiving end of scathing glares from Mr. 8 and Miss Monday. "While the gorilla woman had slipped alcohol into our drinks, it was more out of the fact that she wanted us conked out before we put you all back to square one on the food problems. That I was fine with, but the opportunistic fucks who had the balls to even consider trying to take my girl?" The wolfman's dark laughter brought shudders to bounty hunters' spines, especially the ones who paled in realization that their less than virtuous discussion over the Straw Hats gifted navigator was heard by her captain, her boyfriend no less. "Well, there's a reason you three now find yourself separated from the rest."
The mooks snapped their gazes left and right to find that they had in fact been isolated from the rest of their peers, not that they would have gotten any support from them. The women especially were glaring daggers at the three stooges who at least had the decency to look ashamed, they all banded together under Baroque Works to make the world a slightly brighter place…and yet here they were being like the scum they sought out to end. "Feeling guilty? Good, that's the first step on the road to recovery. Now for the second." Shaving before the three idiots, Luffy smiled down at them like a red haired demon with an equally demonic set of back muscles, "Requiem." As if the souls of the damned began rampaging through their bodies, the three offenders fell to the dirt and began spasming uncontrollably, frothing at the mouth as their eyes rolled to the back of their heads. The three were given no mercy from the wolfman but their peers began to slowly pity them…not enough to try stopping the monster they'd angered though.
"Kyahaha! I know you aren't number agents but I would have assumed you were smart enough not to go around pissing off monsters like him." Luffy, Iggarapoi, Zoro, Nami and the remaining Baroque Work agents looked to the one who spoke, a tall young woman with short blond hair and bright green eyes sporting a wide grin twirled a parasol around as she watched the show. "Oh my, that bounty of yours does nothing to capture how terrifying you truly are, Monkey D. Luffy."
In front of her stood a taller, dark-skinned man with black hair in short spiky dreadlocks wearing a brown trench coat with a pink cravat and a pair of sunglasses spoke next as he tossed a rock up and down, "That bounty poster of yours sure made you look taller than you actually are as well…and a lot more buff. No offense." The wolfman raised a brow at the newcomers, they certainly looked more high-end than the rabble he and his top officers had been wiping the floor with thus far, but neither were brought up by the princess. "Now I don't know why you're here but if it's all the same to you my partner and I would rather not get in your way."
"If that was your goal, laughing loudly and starting up a conversation is a piss poor method to go about accomplishing it." The wolfman's scoff was followed by another round of laughter from the girl, well she certainly seemed easily amused, and a shrug from the man.
"You'd have seen the explosions or felt the shuddering of the ground later on so we figured we'd let you know it was us doing our own business rather than risk you thinking we were another pair of idiots shooting way beyond our weight class." The man explained while looking around the area, searching for something…or someone. "On the topic of not getting in each other's way, would you happen to have seen a light skinned woman with light blue hair? Our boss has found her allegiances to be…elsewhere." The dark skinned man stopped his searching as he caught the flinch from the taller Mr. 8 who began sweating like bullets. "In a similar vein, Mr.8 has also been deemed a traitor. A man against the world being made better." Clenching his fists around the rock he'd been playing around with, the dark skinned man sneered, "Another bug to be blown off."
Now in a very much panicked state of mind, Iggarapoi pulled down the loops of his bowtie, causing barrels that were hidden within his many curls to reveal themselves as they fired bursts of explosive rounds aimed straight for the new arrivals, "Die! Igarappappa! Neither of you will lay a hand on the princess!" Iggarapoi cried out with firm resolve, "On my name as Squad Captain of Alabasta Kingdom Security, Igaram!"
From the massive burst of smoke caused by the detonation of the explosive rounds, the blonde haired woman burst through the top unscatched with a laugh, "Kyahahahaha! Is that the best you can do, you old' codger!" Similarly to his partner, the smoke dissipated around the tall man in a trench coat looked no worse for wear, if anything the man just looked insulted. "I know you're rough around the edges but surely you haven't gone senile already?"
Igarappoi, or Igaram as it were, grit his teeth over the woman's mocking. In truth, he had forgotten the devil fruits the two agents had consumed before becoming part of Baroque Works. "The Kiro-Kiro no Mi and Bomu-Bomu no Mi, explosions mean absolutely fuck all to the two of you." Luffy watched the play by play with mild interest, when he'd first heard about explosions and shaking earth he'd wondered if the pair had access to vibration based devil fruits or that generator style paramecia that gave the user the ability to generate nitroglycerin that could be combusted at will. Learning what the actual fruits were left him more than a little disappointed, and thus bored, the fruits themselves weren't terrible, a lot could be done with them but it all depended on the user…and after meeting Buggy, Luffy's hopes were not high for the two bounty hunters before him. "No matter. If explosive rounds won't work then good old fashion piercing ammunition will have to do. Those, neither you nor your partner are resistant to Mr. 5."
"Baroque Works." Mr. 5 yelled, grabbing the attention of the shell shocked bounty hunters of Whiskey Peak. "Here are your new orders! Capture Mr. 8, Miss Wednesday, and the overgrown duck Karoo before the sun rises. Failure results in…" The tall man's crescendo fell flat as one of the more controversial parts of the organization came to the limelight. "Well, we all know why the Unluckies are dubbed as such." A shudder rippled through the bounty hunters, all of them sharing looks of terror with one another…before shadows were cast over their eyes and they raised their weapons. "I'll be honest, Igaram. I respected the hell out of you in the past…but that's just it isn't it? The past." A fire was blazing in Mr.5's eyes and you could see it through the man's sunglasses, "Now you're defending a family that's forsaken its people! The Nefertari Family turned out to be no different than the World Nobles! Scum who only look out for themselves!"
Luffy, Nami and Zoro all shared looks of realization after hearing the bomb man's words. It sounded like the Desert King's control extended way beyond his domain in Alabasta, and his influence amongst the bounty hunters of Baroque Works was ironclad. Oh how foolish these people were, how misguided the poor blokes had become. All good faith that was with the royal family of Alabasta had dried up like the harshest regions of their kingdom. The Utopia they were promised was nothing like the one that would actually come to fruition but even if they outed Crocodile here as the true head of Baroque Works all it would cause was an even more enraged mob of deluded fanatics.
Luffy sighed tiredly yet loudly, grabbing the attention of all those around them, "This is why I hate politics, and mind games." Raising his fist into the air, the wolfman caused many to begin fleeing in terror, their renewed vigor brought about by their superior officer vanished like it was never sparked aflame, "Rebellion!" Smashing his fist clean through the Earth beneath him, the ground shook and cracked before tendrils of black flames burst forth and began to devour all those unfortunate enough to be caught by it. 5 had been able to evade the flames by an impressive feat of strength as he jumped straight up onto one of the roofs and Igaram was brought to another roof by Zoro. The fleeing extras were not so lucky as their bodies fell to the ground…untouched?
Mr. 5's face scrunched up in confusion, those were clearly flames and they certainly had the heat of one so why were the people not burned to crisps? "I only burn what I want to burn." The dark skinned man switched his focus from the downed Baroque Works grunt to the rookie who was smiling smugly at him. "In this case, I burned away their energy and their will to resist. Perks to being a Mythical Zoan. Devil Bullshittery can be cranked well past 11." The bomb man wished he could argue but the feats made by other pirates and even a certain marine with Mythical Zoan fruits backed up the wolfman's cockiness.
"I feel like there should be a limit on just how busted devil fruits can be, a drawback if you will, aside from being made useless in the water." Mr. 5 grumbled, not noticing the twitch in Luffy's eyes as he made that statement.
'Oh buddy, you have no idea of the kind of bullshit I put up with because of this fruit.'
'The smell? No, wait, it's the hearing? It's the hearing that's most annoying isn't it?'
'Neither. You're number one, fleabag.'
'Rude. You kiss your mother with that mouth? Oh wait, that's right! She's dead.'
'Go fuck yourself Wolf.'
'Make me, you arrogant, boar headed, waste of oxygen, punkass-'
"If you don't mind me asking, why exactly are you interfering in our organization's personal matters?" The blonde woman asked as she landed next to her partner with nary a sound. "There is the fact that we are bounty hunters but surely there must be more to it than that? While these dull blokes may have accepted your reasoning for the attacks being made on principle, you don't strike me as the kind of man to do that."
Luffy straightened up and extracted his fist from the ground, shaking off the dirt dismissively as he addressed the kilo woman. "Oh? And why is that Miss…?"
"Valentine. The codename given to me was Miss Valentine." The woman answered with an easy smile that then turned into a thoughtful frown. "As for my reasoning to this inquiry, well, if you battle opponents on the matter of principle alone then Loguetown shouldn't have been left intact."
Luffy raised a brow at that, the woman certainly had a head on her shoulders and connections if news of what happened at Loguetown had already reached her ears. Though the argument could also be made that like many others she was foolish for not connecting the dots for the relationship between the wolfman and the hero of the marines. Honestly, it isn't like "Monkey D." is a common surname. "As for your relationship with Garp the Fist being something that would stop you, assuming the rumors of how he goes about training his students are true, which they probably are, then you weeding out the ones in need of 'refreshers' would actually be praised by him." Nevermind, she also took that into account. "So that begs the question, what possible reason could you have for interfering here? The bounty hunters of Whiskey Peak and Baroque Works as a whole aren't targeting you, except for a few isolated incidents, and you certainly aren't a bloodthirsty maniac like that rookie from the South. If anything you would be an ally in our organization's endeavors, an asset of great value to Mr.0's grand plan."
While the wolfman chatted away with Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine, Nami found her attention being drawn to the side where a few blocks away, Usopp was waving his arms around frantically. Frowning as a pit of dread settled in her stomach, Nami cast one last look on her lover only to see him making gestures behind his back. Deciphering the message, Nami prepared to leave but paused in standing up to see if there would be any…obstacles.
Mr. 5 let the discussion between his partner and the dangerous rookie continue, but while he wasn't eager to engage in battle with someone who could trade blows with the strongest of the Warlords, he wasn't about to let Nami out of sight just yet. The captain was a monster but his crew wasn't…not that Mr. 5 wanted it to come to that but if he must. "Were you perhaps hired by the princess?" The bomb man cut off Valentine from whatever else she was going to bring up for the pointless banter between herself the pirate captain. It honestly wasn't necessary for him to ask the question, Igaram being aided by the vice captain of the pirates revealed more than enough about why the Straw Hats were here. "If so, you're supporting the wrong cause."
Luffy blinked at Mr. 5 before roaring in laughter, even going so far as throwing his head back just to up the condescension. "You think you have any grounds to claim you're on the right side of this whole debacle? You don't even know who your magnanimous, benevolent Mr. 0 even is!" With the wolfman having grabbed both Valentine and 5's attention, and ire, Nami headed off to help Usopp deal with whatever it was that got him all riled up. The navigator hoped it wasn't anything too troublesome…or deadly.
Not that far behind the pair was Igaram and Zoro, "Where are we going, Mr. Swordsman?" the olderman asked, running a little bit behind Zoro. "And while your captain is indeed impressive, shouldn't he at least have some-"
"We're heading to whatever it is that's got Nami in a rush. Worst case scenario something might have happened to the princess." Igaram tensed over the possibility. If anything were to happen to the princess then Alabasta was lost. "As for leaving Luffy alone, heh, honestly you and I would just end up as collateral at best. Since we arrived in the Grand Line, Luffy hasn't been himself. He's been more erratic to say the least, it's best we give him a wide berth to let loose before he blows up in a less desirable situation."
Igaram was about to retort but the trembling earth and pillars of black flames shut him up. The swordsman knew his captain longer than Igaram had, who was he to argue against the expert.
Back on the battlefield, Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine found themselves trapped with the wolfman in a circle of black flames that reached higher than the kilo woman deemed safe to even attempt to escape with her powers. "I'll be honest, you're both idiots." Luffy's blunt commentary was not appreciated if the glares he was receiving was anything to go by. "You follow a man you don't even know. You accept the words and promises of a creep from the shadows without question. Seriously, did neither of your parents give you the talk about stranger danger?"
Luffy cackled seeing how livid the two professionals were getting over his taunting. Seems like he struck a nerve. 'Going under the assumption that they do have doubts about the sincerity of Mr. 0's plans, what keeps them loyal to leatherface? Fear of the Unluckies ratting them out?' The wolfman considered that to be the most plausible theory. The two couldn't be afraid of the Unluckies themselves, an otter and a vulture with machine guns and assassination experience wouldn't hold up much in a clash against other assassins with the power of on demand explosions and the ability to hit like a collapsing building. 'Or a non-armament haki coated meteor fist.' Luffy internally grimaced at the memory of that fun little family outing with Garp.
Speaking of meteor fists, Luffy quickly shaved to the side when Valentine came crashing down the spot he'd been standing on just a few seconds prior. Sheesh, take your mind off the battlefield for a few moments to reminisce on your grandfather's idea of family bonding time and get rewarded with almost certainly breaking every single bone in your body. Was she wearing heels? Luffy shifted his head to the left as a rock passed him by only to shave to another area entirely when the damn thing detonated in a Dynamite level explosion.
"Don't suppose there's any way we could talk this out?" Luffy asked in his best, 'oh god what mess have I gotten myself into' impression…otherwise known as 'Usopp in a nutshell' impression. A long nosed man a few blocks away sneezed loudly. Valentine completely lost her cool at this point and just started charging Luffy much to the wolfman's amusement. The woman's usage of her devil fruit left much to be desired so far but who knows, maybe she'll do something other than just shifting her entire body's weight from 1 to 10,000 Kilograms and everything in between all at one time. In the case of 5, the man had instead reigned in his emotions and began to assess the situation. Luffy knew because in the midst of hopping away from the blonde woman screaming bloody murder, her partner was observing him, looking for patterns in the way he moved, most likely working out a way to deal the most amount of damage in the least amount of time. It wasn't a bad course of action but the bomb man probably should have been paying more attention to amount of damage Valentine had been doing to the Earth around them during the game of PADBTTG, pound-a-disrespectful-brat-to-the-ground, Luffy led her on. If he had, the bomb man, who'd starting tossing up another stone would have realized what the pirate was going for before the whole place went straight to hell. Literally.
"Stay still you piece-of-AGH! What in the?!" Taking his eyes off the wolfman Mr. 5 saw the latest crater Valentine had created crack at the point of impact and veined its way the edges of the billowing flames that encircled them. The man then felt the Earth shift under him in the tell tale signs of-
"Oh no." Mr. 5 paled in realization of what was about to happen and searched for a way, any way, that he could escape the disaster that was about to unfold. Alas no salvation was to be found, instead, the bomb man had met eyes with wolfman who just grinned like a maniac, as if totally uncaring of the pain they were about to undergo. "You doomed us all you maniac!"
"Did I?" Luffy then jumped up and began hopping on air just out of Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine's reach. "Looks to me like you just dug your own grave." The wolfman's cheeky grin was the last thing the pair saw before the loosened earth beneath them finally gave way and they both went down into shadows. Luffy came to rest on one of the building's roofs and waited for the sinkhole to calm down. Once it had, he planned on grabbing those two, and every other mook and grunt that got caught in the crossfire out of the death trap. Hearing the distinct sounds of steel capped boots making their way to him from behind, Luffy turned his head around just enough to see Sanji making his way over with a solemn expression. "All right, let's hear it. What was it that got Usopp going crazy earlier?"
Sanji exhaled a long puff of smoke from his fresh cigarette, Luffy's eye twitched on how the cook's once filled to the brim box of cancer sticks had dropped down to a quarter of it's last known amount, before answering, "The Going Merry was attacked." Had a pin been dropped it would have been heard hitting the ground from miles away. That was how deathly silent it became in response to Luffy's cold, malicious fury. "Damage was done to the main mast and to the Merry's sides. Usopp's began patching her up but it will be awhile before we're seaworthy again. An hour at minimum was the estimation Usopp gave me."
"Who did it?" The wolfman's question sent shivers down the blonde cook's spine. When he'd first arrived, Sanji had been planning on playing to his reputation for treating women like queens and berating Luffy for how roughly he treated Miss Monday and Miss Valentine in an attempt to lighten the mood but that didn't seem like such a good idea anymore. "Who harmed Merry?" Sanji could honestly say he was impressed with Luffy for considering the Merry to be a member of the crew as her own unique identity, most pirates never even entertained the idea, yet Luffy acted as if the Merry was actually a klabautermann. A manifestation of the ship's consciousness. With a dismissive shake of his head, Sanji removed all thoughts of that sailor's tale from his mind.
"Already taken care of. Usopp had caught sight of suspicious ships early on and went to get Nami and Zoro for help. Usopp took Zoro along with him to the Going Merry to deal with the outsiders, Baroque Work agents apparently, while Nami and ol' curly went to retrieve the Princess. Turned out to be unnecessary since both Vivi and Nein were on board the Merry alongside a duck named Carue. They were the ones who clashed with the Baroque Agents first, putting up a good fight but there were too many." Sanji took another drag of his cigarette as he took a seat next to Luffy, the sinkhole before them slowly coming to a calm at long last. "Usopp and Zoro came in and dealt with the grunts but the damage to Merry was done."
Luffy took in all the news Sanji brought him in deathly silence. The tension in the air was suffocating but eventually it cleared as the wolfman stood up and turned away from the sinkhole. "Get everyone out of the sinkhole but keep a look out for the dark skinned man in a trenchcoat wearing sunglasses and the blonde woman in a flowery dress with a yellow and orange hat. I want them brought to my feet on Merry's deck no later than necessary. Understood?"
Sanji looked at his captain's eyes quietly and looked like he was going to refuse the order…but instead the cook just stood up, lit a fresh cigarette and made his way into the sinkhole. "Aye-aye Captain." The blonde chef wasn't happy about what might transpire later and he knew Luffy was well aware of that as the wolfman hadn't even reprimanded him for taking yet another cigarette right in front of him. Before Luffy could get out of hearing range however, he did hear Sanji's one request for his compliance in retrieving Mr. 5 and Miss Valentine. "Just make their execution swift…please?"
Luffy stopped in his tracks and turned to his chef with his eyes shadowed by his straw hat. The two stared each other down for a few moments longer before Luffy walked off without another word and Sanji sighed as he carried out his captain's orders. "There is always more to a story than just the front page. Let's hope, for their sake, that the rest of their tale paints them in a better light.." Luffy murmured under his breath just loud enough that the chef could hear him. A chance had been given, and it was more than the chef knew he could've asked for at that moment.
The mood on the docks where the Merry was being worked on was nothing if not agonizingly tense. Usopp seemed to be taking the damage Merry sustained the hardest as he hadn't once looked up since greeting Luffy when the wolfman had arrived on the scene. Working alongside the tinkerer, Zoro was going about repairing the Merry in much the same silently seething state of mind. On the deck however, things were relatively better…at least until Luffy came face to face with the would-be shipwreckers.
"You've got a lot of balls coming after the Going Merry." Luffy's growl was the first sign that indicated his presence on the deck to the two trembling citizens of Alabasta, and a silently leering navigator. Igaram and Vivi who'd been keeping an eye on the chained individuals in what Luffy assumed to be military uniforms from a desert country. No rewards for guessing why those two were particularly livid. "I'm going to go out on a limb and say you recognize these mooks, Igaram?"
The Squad Captain of the Royal Guard of Alabasta returned to his tight scowl as he glared down at the apprehended men and woman who glared back with equal heat, "Much to my dismay, yes. These men were up and coming soldiers from the ranks of Alabasta's military. The woman you see at the head, was the top candidate for joining the Royal Guard two years back. Melissa Bright."
The woman in the lead glared daggers at Igaram and snarled at him, her deep blue ocean eyes brimming with contempt.
"What are you doing here, Mel?" In contrast to Igaram's anger and disappointment, Luffy and Nami noted the pain that came with how Vivi addressed the leader of the bounded group. The shortened name suggested familiarity and the pain sounded akin to betrayal, a tone the pirate captain and his navigator were very familiar with. Nami's seething dampened in favor of preparing herself for possibly having to deal with a very emotional monarch, in the process causing her not to see the shift in Melissa's eyes when they turned to Vivi.
Luffy, however, did notice the change in her eyes. Gone was the heated glare directed at Igaram, now replaced with one of longing, of the pain one experiences when they reunite with a friend or family member after a very long time. The glare was gone, the gaze was soft. Melissa looked upon Vivi's trembling form with desperation, as if the princess could vanish or slip from her grasp like she was never even there. Honestly, the wolfman would even go so far as to say the entire scene before him was one reminiscent of star-crossed lovers. Melissa Bright, a woman from humble beginnings rose through the ranks of the Alabasta Royal Army in hopes of capturing the woman who'd taken her- Why was everyone looking at him like he was nuts?
"Captain Luffy…Forgive me for this but the image of you reading through trashy romantic novels like a typical ditzy teenage girl clashes immensely with the reputation, both good and bad, that you've made for yourself in the East Blue." Igaram's deadpanned assessment was greeted with nods from the bound soldiers, Vivi, and Nami, though the navigator did seem a little amused at her husband's blunder.
A blunder to which Luffy dealt with in the most appropriate and mature manner for one with a reputation such as himself. The wolfman blushed beet red, turned away from everyone on deck and growled, "Shut up, you decrepit knobgobbler." under his breath. In response to his childishness, Luffy heard Nami snort and mutter under her breath that the wolfman didn't even know what a 'knobgobbler' was but Luffy ignored that. The wolfman ignored it and lost his blush, when he got the feeling of being laughed at behind his back in much the same way he felt whenever Ace and Sabo shared a laugh at his expense. No one onboard was laughing though and more importantly no one was behind him…except…Luffy narrowed his eyes at Merry's figurehead. It was ludicrous but his gut told him the caravel was pulling a Ace and Sabo…it was at this point that Luffy concluded he clearly had not gotten enough sleep last night…well neither he, Nami or their not so innocent guest had really, the wolfman smirked at that memory.
While Luffy had his musings, Vivi asked Melissa again, "What are you doing here, Mel?" though with far less trembling and noticeably more heat. Igaram and Nami eyed the princess wearily as she looked just about ready to snap. Under the royal's glare, Melissa squirmed in her bounds, looking left, right and behind her to her squadron, holding one long one towards the man right behind her, probably the Vice Captain of their little group. When the Vice Captain nodded grimly to Melissa, the sandy brunette haired woman took a deep breath before returning to facing Igaram like a cockroach she wanted nothing more than to crush under her boot.
"I was sent here under King Cobra's orders." Igaram and Vivi both stiffened hearing the woman invoke the name of the King. Melissa's next words were delivered venomously as she never once broke eye contact with Igaram. "Our mission was to seek out and apprehend former Squad Captain of Alabasta Kingdom Security, Igaram and rescue Princess Nefetari Vivi from the demented, disgusting, traitorous, pedophile."
Luffy, Nami, Vivi and Igaram suddenly went ramrod straight and slack jawed at the woman's declaration but Melissa's venomous words for the old man hadn't come to an end just yet. "King Cobra begged us to save her from you, you worthless, lousy, conceited, hedonistic, conniving degenerate sack of shit!" Ayayay, Luffy didn't even have the words to describe this…actually wait this was becoming familiar… "You turned your back on your country for your own sick, twisted desires! Took my best friend away from her home to use as your plaything! A little girl you were practically a second father to! Allied yourself with a shady organization hellbent on bringing our kingdom to ruins! When I get out of these binds I am going to castrate you and shove it down your throat you hear me, you sick fuck?!"
Good God above, Melissa was frothing at the mouth, practically rabid as she went to town on verbally trashing Igaram. Even if everything coming out of her mouth was horse shit the Squad Captain looked about ready to hurl from the things he was being charged with, poor guy lived a long time in the political arena so he must've had quite a few points of reference on how to picture up the gut-wrenching image Melissa was painting for all those on Merry's deck. "I swore to bring Princess Vivi home and I don't care if I have to die to do it! Koza's fury be damned!"
Nami noted that at this point, both Vivi and Igaram looked about ready to rush to Merry's side and puke their guts out at the mere image of it all, but Luffy, while surprised by the outburst, wasn't very bothered by the painting that had been conjured up in his mind. The navigator was more concerned over Luffy's nonchalance over it all than the false accusations Melissa was making, Nami knew her husband was more than a little fucked up in the head but to not even be bothered in the slightest was…actually considering how she herself could brush it off and be more concerned over Luffy's lack of disgust maybe she wasn't the best person to judge right now.
As Nami had her moment of self-reflection, Luffy openly commented, "This is starting to remind me about a story I read before, a really shittty one too-" having gained everyone else's attention Luffy promptly pointed at Melissa before continuing, "-also you're pretty dumb."
Melissa blinked once, twice, then looked like someone just smacked her across the face, "I beg your pardon?!"
"It seems you've taken everything at face value, which you have to admit is very dumb." Luffy coughed into his fist as he placed himself between Melissa and his clients. Clients who while still dumbfounded and disgusted were slowly getting themselves back together only to backpedal when the wolfman suddenly set a very hostile glare directed straight at Igaram. The older man flinched back but years of experience in politics gave him a knack for knowing when a glare was genuine and when it was an act and while Luffy's 'fury' was terrifying, Igaram could tell there was no real heat to it. Not that the glare still didn't send shivers down his spine. "Of course the same could be said about me. Perhaps I put my trust in the wrong side of this whole shit show so why don't you enlighten me on a few things before I rip you a new one, Ms. Bright."
While the blonde haired woman was wary of trusting a pirate, news about Monkey D. Luffy's exploits and behaviors worked in the man's favor, and so the woman decided to trust him. Admittedly very presumptuous and bold-faced of her to expect any help from him after she and her squad tried to wreck his ship but frankly she couldn't afford to be picky at the moment. "Ask away, Mr. Monkey D."
"How would Igaram have made it this far, for this long, in this sick venture of his without any of you in the kingdom doing anything about it and more importantly…I want to know why. What are the motives behind this?" Melissa quickly nodded, not that Luffy could see her, and jumped into explaining everything as King Cobra had explained it to her.
"Two years ago, Igaram had acquired a devil fruit that granted him the powers of hypnosis. We don't know how long he could have been planning to kidnap the princess but the acquisition of the devil fruit as well as the emergence of Baroque Works likely granted him the opportunity to bump up his schedule." Melissa spared a moment to grit her teeth as she shot a Akainu-Grade searing look at Igaram, "This is how he was able to take the princess away from Alabasta and keep the King quiet. This is why the country is the clusterfuck it is right now. THIS IS WHY I PERSONALLY BEGGED TO KILL YOU MYSELF! YOU-"
Melissa's tirade was ended before it could continue because of Luffy who let out a little blast of Conqueror's Haki to shut her up before leveling a glare from Igaram back to blonde haired woman who snapped her jaw shut and suddenly remembered just how quickly she could be snuffed up if the wolfman was ever so inclined to do so. "The motive behind this all, Bright?"
The wolfman's patience was wearing thin and his words felt like a blade against the woman's neck. Gulping anxiously Melissa rushed out the rest. "For his own twisted desires, Igaram took Vivi for himself as well as a…gift for Mr. 0 in exchange for a position in Alabasta when the sands settle. King Cobra just recently broke out of the hypnosis this degenerate bastard put him under. Whether it was through a slip in his concentration, him going out of range or the ability's effect finally wearing off, the point is that the King was no longer under this traitor's control."
Igaram who'd listened to Melissa's tale and accusation in silence, save for a few moments of trying to keep his dinner down, now claimed innocence. "I, Igaram, Squad Captain of Alabasta Security, never have nor ever will do anything to compromise my kingdom. I did not consume any such devil fruit nor do I have any powers related to hypnosis..." The man's calm patient delivery ended there as his eye twitched when he concluded, "You foolish, airheaded, naive child." Honestly, if he did have that devil fruit did it ever occur to her that he may have had the Straw Hats under his control and this whole thing was staged to get her to spill the beans. Igaram shook his head disappointedly as the brunette woman who growled indignantly in response.
Melissa's ire is doused away when Vivi stepsed up to her and asks, "Melissa if such a devil fruit existed how sure are you that my father wasn't under its influence when he supposedly awoken?"
In response, and honestly very naively hopeful that somehow Vivi broke through the hypnosis ever so slightly, Melissa responds, "The King has acted as he always had for the past two years since you were captured, Vi. It's only recently that, now that he's become free, he started acting like a distressed parent."
From behind the princess who had stiffened like a log, Luffy and Nami shared a deadpan expression, the two silently agreeing on one thing. "Mel…you do know that if such a devil fruit existed, then father could have been put under hypnosis just recently?" Vivi hoped to Ra that Melissa had a very good answer to that question. S he didn't.
Melissa opened her mouth, ready to argue and defend the King…only to blink numerous times before gulping as she broke out into a nervous sweat and coincidentally couldn't keep her eyes on Vivi anymore, "Well…that is a, uh…possibility?"
The proceeding silence was deafening. Which of course meant that when it was broken by the indignant cries of outrage from Melissa Bright's squad, they sounded so much louder.
"REALLY MEL?!"
"FOR FUCKS SAKE WOMAN! FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE LIVE UP TO YOUR NAME!"
"THIS NEVER OCCURED TO YOU?!"
These and similar raging comments continued to crash unto the light sandy haired brunette who suddenly seemed to be very small under all the scrutiny. The worst comments were the ones left unspoken however, Vivi shaking her disappointedly at her, and Igaram pinching his eyes with a deep sigh of exasperation. Those two were the ones that cut the deepest into Melissa but true to her nature, she was stubborn till proven otherwise. A personality trait Igaram and Vivi loved when it was for them but absolutely detested when it was against them.
"N-Now hang on a second guys! While it is a…possibility, that the King was just recently put under hypnosis, it wouldn't explain why Igaram or Vivi ever left the safety of the kingdom, now does it?" Melissa's words stalled the torrents of insults hurled her way but it did little to lessen the glares she was receiving. Even if it wasn't the case, Melissa should have accounted for that possibility instead of just jumping on to what King Cobra was selling. Alas, Melissa's reprieve from the onslaught was destined to only be brief as Vivi, in the most dead, absolutely done with this bullshit tone, revealed just why she and Igaram had left Alabasta two years ago.
"Two years ago, Igaram had caught wind of how shady the organization Baroque Works actually was. Aside from being the bounty hunting guild it was advertising itself as, it apparently had connections in the underground, in the Pits." The princess spat the name as if it were the most vile thing she'd ever come across and wouldn't be caught dead anywhere near. "Upon learning about the darker truths of Baroque Works, Igaram prepared to set out and infiltrate the organization and gather information from within. I caught him right before he set out, ordered him to spill whatever it was that he found out, then joined him in the infiltration mission."
Crossing her arms, Vivi glared down at Melissa who was not only paler than a fluffy cloud on a sunny day, but sweating like a reindeer in the desert. "You tell me which seems more likely. Igaram and I infiltrating Baroque Works in an attempt to gain information that could save our kingdom, or Igaram, a man who, as you said, was like a second father to me, to us both frankly, turned out to be a pedophile who just so happened to acquire a hypnosis devil fruit, just as Baroque Works entered the scene, and somehow managed to hypnotize father and myself while making a clean getaway?" The only sound on Merry's deck was the Royal princess of Alabasta tapping her foot on the ground 'patiently' waiting for a response from the woman who was not only her childhood friend but practically her adopted older sister. Her older sister who now seemed like she wanted nothing more than to bury herself six feet under as she was subject to the furious gazes of her crew, and Vivi as well as a disappointed look from Igaram.
"The former…about you and Igaram infiltrating Baroque Works is more plausible…" The bluenette relaxed slightly, "But!-"
'Oh Ra fucking damn it!'
"-Igaram could just be forcing you to say all this with his hypnosis devil fruit!" By this point, Vivi was passed just being disappointed. She was absolutely and unequivocally, livid.
Thankfully for the princess however, a wolfman who'd been watching from the sidelines, which was where he had disappeared to once the back and forth between the two girls began, got off his ass, passed the popcorn to his wife, and cut in between Vivi and Melissa before the prior exploded and said things she was undoubtedly going to regret. "If I may?" Luffy said as a way of getting everyone else's attention. "I can prove that Igaram is in fact, not a devil fruit user of any kind."
"Oh thank Ra!" Igaram said, oblivious to the princess's frantic attempts at trying to dissuade him and to the orange haired navigator smirking knowingly behind him. "Whatever you mas- cough cough- Ma Ma Maaaa! Ahem! Please do whatever it is you need to do to end this madness, Mr. Monkey-" That was as far as Igaram got before the wolfman grabbed his sides, picked him up, then nonchalantly threw the Squad Captain of Alabasta Security right into the bay. All this done with a blank impassive face, save for the gleam in his eyes. A gleam that in the short period of knowing him, Vivi had already come to know as the tell tale signs of Luffy going out of his way to be an asshole.
Turning to a shell shocked Melissa, Luffy simply raised his hand the three fingers out, two fingers out, one finger out, and-
"What in Anubis's mangy, flea riddled asshole, was that for, Straw Hat!" Igaram's outraged yelling was heard after the sound of something, obviously the man himself, breaking out of the ocean's surface. A feat that meant-
"As you can see, Igaram can still swim." Luffy said calmly making his way to Merry's side while grabbing a bundle of ropes along the way. Flinging them off the edge, Luffy turned back to Mel with an easy smile as he leaned back, "Devil fruit users can't, ergo Igaram ain't a devil fruit user."
A soaking wet Igaram, who climbed his way back to Merry's deck with the rope, added with a heated glare directed at the pirate, "A common fact known to all, and one I'm sure you'll enjoy showcasing to us!" The older man then attempted to give Luffy a taste of his own medicine only to find himself back in the water and the wolfman whistling away without a care in the world.
Vivi shook her head over the wolfman's antics, briefly giving the navigator a stink eye for her laughing her ass off on the deck behind her, before turning to Mel and groaning, "Oh my-What else do you need to hear so it gets stuck in that thick head of yours that Igaram is innocent?!"
The ocean blue eyed soldier bit her lip, eyes shifting erratically as her mind raced a thousand miles per minute trying to find some way out of this. 'It would suck for me cause I'd be on the receiving end of a lot of criticism for being bullheaded again, but on the off chance that what the King said is true how do I-Wait…That's it!'
Luffy raised his brow, silently shushing Igaram who was glaring daggers at him and prepared to yell, before pointing towards Melissa who looked like a lightbulb had just gone off atop her head. "Say something only Vivi would know." The princess gave her practically adopted older sister an incredulous look prompting Melissa to ask again, a little louder, "Say something only Vivi would know."
From her spot against Merry's railing, Nami gave Melissa a look of surprise…out of how dumb the request was. What, did Melissa think that just because it was something only her and Vivi would know a hypnotist wouldn't have been able to get the princess to just reveal a random thing? Honestly this woman was hopeless.
Vivi was of similar thoughts as her right eye twitched in exasperation…at least it was twitching before a gleam not so different from the one Luffy had just moments ago came to life in her eyes. A gleam that made Melissa immediately regret her request. With sadistic smirk Vivi tilted her head up to enhance the feeling of condescension as she granted Melissa's request. "Melissa Bright has the words, "Brad was here" tattooed on her right butt cheek."
Everyone on deck was blinking their eyes at that, save for Bright who had gone deathly pale, before Luffy asked, "Ok…I can see why that would be kind of weird and embarrassing but it's not something super strange nowadays…" Getting your then love's name tattooed on your body was something that a lot of young people did nowadays and it wasn't even limited to people you viewed romantically. Ace had the letters ASC tattooed in his arm after himself, Luffy, and Sabo after all. Luffy grumbled internally about being stuck with crybaby after shedding a few tears every time Garp came to town. Bloody bastards, they all cried whenever Garp came to town. Nami was of similar thoughts but her train of thought shifted when the name Brad started to seem vaguely familiar. The navigator could've sworn she heard a similar story about girls having the words, "Brad was here" tattooed on them in the past but she couldn't for the life of her remember who she had heard it from. The wolfman and his lover's internal monologues came to a screeching halt when Vivi dropped the real reason why her revelation was so damning.
"She has no idea who Brad is." A pin could have been dropped at that moment and it would have been as loud as cannon fire. The silence only lasted for a few scant moments though as Melissa Bright blushed as red as ripe cherry tomatoes and screamed.
"You swore not to tell anyone about that!" The princess known for her kindness, level-headedness, and compassion…just could not bring herself to give even a single lick of care as she retorted.
"Karma bitch."
That's when practically everyone aboard the Going Merry lost it. Luffy fell to his knees wheezing in laughter slowly making his way to Nami who had burst out in laughter and ended up choking on some popcorn yet still found it in her to continue laughing with tears in her eyes. Even the squadron behind Melissa who'd been glaring daggers at their superior officer just moments prior, were now laughing themselves shitless. The only ones aboard who had not descended into hysterical cheer were the princess who looked down on Melissa smugly, the butt of the joke who looked betrayed like a puppy who'd gotten kicked, uncomprehending of why it being subject to abuse for chewing on its best friends shiny new shoes, and Igaram who just shook his head disappointedly at Bright, his expression the epitome of the phrase, 'I expected better from you.'
The world that had been spinning so rapidly in the past few hours had grind to a halt leaving the remaining moment to slam into Mr. 5's head like a sledgehammer making for a killer headache. At least that's how the man would describe it if he were ever asked about how his first time on the Going Merry went. With a pained groan the man groggily took in his surroundings, he was tied up and kneeling with his partner, Miss Valentine in the same position also just coming to, the ludicrously overpowered rookie in front of them, observing them with a loose smile, his crew behind him on the right, and the Alabastans on the left…though if his memory was right then there were more Alabastans than before.
"Welcome back to the land of the living, 5, Valentine." The wolfman said conversationally as one would when bringing up the latest bit of mildly interesting news to their close colleagues. "I'm sure the two of you are smart enough to know what happens next, yes?"
The two were well aware of what the young man was getting at but fear gave them pause. 5 and Valentine shared a nervous look at each other before looking around and listening for the sound of flapping wings or, godforbid, flower petals in the breeze. The agents shuddered remembering what that woman was capable of doing without a shred of remorse. Morbid and traumatizing memories aside, 5 and Valentine silently agreed that to give in to Straw Hats demands now and doubling back to Mr.0 could still salvage their positions in Baroque Works or at least gave them enough brownie points to walk out alive…hopefully. Though depending on just how much about their base operations and fellow agents are revealed, maybe they should just look for other places of employment and penance. Charity work opened their doors for anyone willing to lend a hand right?
From his spot before the two mercenaries, Luffy observed the silent back and forth between 5 and Valentine. Proceeding with his questions only after the two nodded their understanding of what was to come next. "Is there anyone in Baroque Works who has the ability to hypnotize or mind control an individual?"
In response to Luffy's question, 5 and Valentine shared a confused and concerned look. They expected to be able to give vague answers but it seemed the rookie had a decent idea about at least one more agent, and possibly her partner, already. "There is. A young woman who was given the codename Miss Goldenweek." 5 said after getting a nod from Valentine. The blonde was on good terms with the other agent so 5 wanted to see if she was fine with divulging some information on the younger girl. "She's able to change a person's mood and by extension their actions through her paint. It isn't a devil fruit power, in case you were wondering, but we don't know how it works either. Only that it's a family secret."
"Affect their mood you say? That doesn't sound like she'd be able to make someone do anything oddly specific like say…Order a hit on one of their allies?" 5 opened his mouth to respond but suddenly found himself at a loss. Truth be told he wasn't sure what the extent of Miss Goldenweek's control could be but the wolfman's example seemed a bit of a reach from what he understood of it. In the middle of his thoughts the bomb man offhandedly noticed the death glares being sent the wolfman's way from the citizens of Alabasta. Maybe this oddly specific set of parameters was actually something to do with one of their allies? "Could you have multiple paints at the same time as well? Such as ones that seem to conflict with one another such as, oh I don't know, unfounded paranoia and aloof happiness?"
5 was left blinking dumbly at Luffy for a few moments before turning to Valentine who was quietly staring back at the wolfman patiently. Noticing her partner's gaze on her, Valentine turned to him with a confused expression. The deadpan expression she received was enough to get her to understand that 5 had zero idea how to answer the rookie's question. So, in a bit of a fluster as she wasn't expecting to end up talking right then and there, Valentine explained Goldenweek's powers as the swirly eyebrowed chef, who'd begun swooning over her being cute as the kilo woman was flustered, got a karate chop to the head from an annoyed macha haired swordsman.
"Goldenweek is able to paint multiple colors onto someone but the emotion they take on would either be a mixture of the two colors' standard mood shifters, a dud, or something else entirely." Valentine's lengthy explanation wasn't over just yet but it was at this point that she paused as the blonde playboy and macha haired oni both got knuckle sandwiches from a ticked off navigator. "I haven't seen Miss Goldenweek for months though so it is possible that she'd found her way around that hurdle."
Luffy hummed in thought mulling over the information he'd been given. Ignoring the lecture Nami was giving Zoro and Sanji behind him or the incredulous looks being sent his way from the Alabastans, minus Vivi. Turning to the princess, Luffy waved her over so he could whisper something into her ear. No one could hear what was being said but the princess's deepening frown made her displeasure from whatever it was that she was hearing clear. A few more words were passed between the two before Vivi sighed in resignation and gestured to the two agents in a, 'They're all yours.' kind of way. A gesture that made neither Baroque Works agent feel particularly safe given the fresh memory of Luffy dealing with them a little while ago. Their fears and anxiousness rounded back to confusion however when the wolfman actually spoke.
"Could this Miss Goldenweek cause a man who was once regarded as highly intellectual, respectable and overall beloved into a, uh-" Luffy trailed off shifting his eyes over to Melissa, who only noticed after being elbowed by Igaram to focus on the wolfman instead of the swooning masochistic chef, annoyed swordsman and irate navigator. "What were your words to describe the King's new personality for the last few days you were on Alabasta again, Melissa?"
"A loud obnoxious, eccentric, nutjob who started staring at the Royal Army's daily training a lot more often and breaks out into ballet dances while preaching poems about love, peace and acceptance." Melissa said in a deadpan expression, flinching under the glares she was being given by Vivi and Igaram who, after first hearing about King's new attitude, ripped her a new one for just accepting the man for being sane in his accusations against one of his oldest and most trusted aides.
The long nosed teen who'd sweatdropped seeing his other male crewmembers getting decked sent his own scathing glare to the Alabastan soldier but unlike her reaction to the princess and superior officer, the blonde actually turned away with guilt and shame in her eyes. Valentine supposed that the soldier had done something to get on the long nose's bad side in particular. Wondering what it could be, the kilo woman tilted her head to her partner to compare ideas through their silent ocular exchange of information only to be taken aback by just how disgusted the man looked. Disgust that the rookie captain also noticed.
"Anything you'd like to share, Mr. 5?" Having been called out on his slip, the bomb man gulped and shot a panicked look towards Valentine. The message the man was trying to send however was less, 'I'm sorry I messed up, please help me' but instead, 'Dear God above don't force me to relive those memories.' It's amazing how much someone can understand a person after they've been in a working relationship with one another for so long. "Seeing as your partner's looking as lost and confused as the lamb who's wandered off from the group, I'd recommend you just stick to a small description of whoever it is we're dealing with as an impostor king."
The bomb man kept his mouth shut a few moments longer, gathering his thoughts and doing his best not to throw up at the memories of…ugh him. It wasn't that 5 was against people who swung that way or any other way it was just…the approach, and the outfit, God almighty the outfit still haunted him in his dreams. Finally, after several moments of dry heaving, 5 spoke, "The personality shift you're describing isn't something Miss Goldenweek could pull off, but it's definitely a home run for another agent in Baroque Works. Mr. 2, Bon Clay."
The queasiness in how 5 said the agent's name brought a halt to many of the background activities going around the ship at the time, specifically Sanji's go to act for taking people's mind off of whatever was bothering them at the time, oh and bothering Zoro. That was always fun and enjoyable, but even that could not compare to the sinking feeling in the blonde man's gut. The way 5 was acting…he had seen it before back on the Baratie and the blonde was praying to any higher being that would be out there that could hear him that his fears would not be confirmed. "A diehard okama-" They were confirmed. "-with the abilities of the Clone-Clone fruit. Anyone he touches with one hand, he can transform into with the other. He doesn't get the individual's abilities or their clothes or their memories but he does acquire their physical features at the time he touched them as well as their voices."
There were many reactions that came about from the reveal of Mr. 2, Bon Clay. The princess and her fellow Alabastans were tense and pale as the implications of what damage this devil fruit user could do was not lost on them. The atrocities this Bon Clay could commit all with the face of the King, Vivi shuddered to even imagine what the aftermath could be. Whilst the Alabastans were fearing the worst however, amongst the Straw Hats, one practitioner of the Black Leg Style found himself staring at his own body. How? Well that's what tends to happen when your soul leaves your body. The other Straw Hats weren't overly concerned about that though, hell even the cook wasn't focused on it, considering the fact that the Vice Captain Zoro was suddenly as green as his hair and about ready to bolt to the sides of the ship.
"Okay, Sanji I understand being homophobic, and overdramatic-" The last words Usopp murmured elicited angry denials from the cook who'd returned to his body after being called overdramatic, "But I was expecting you to not care in the slightest. Aren't you a big believer of anyone being able to do anything as long as they put their mind and efforts into it?"
The swordsman leveled the marksman with an unimpressed resting bitch face, "First off Tengu, I ain't got nothing against whichever way a person decides to swing. Like I said about our Captain and Nami, it's their love life, not mine. Second-urk" Zoro was interrupted as he dry heaved before shuddering, "I was just reliving the memories of one of the bounties I went after…Black Panty Jeffery."
The women present all looked disturbed even having no idea who this Jeffery was but having an epithet like that…the image was not a pleasant one. All but two of the men present however had either bolted to the side of the ship to hurl their guts out or dry heaved themselves continuously to the point that it looked like they were just performing ab crunches. Who were the two men not queasily losing their lunches? Well the green haired Zoro was almost afraid to ask his captain, who hadn't once turned away from the Baroque Works agents, why he hadn't seemed phased in slightest. Almost.
"I'm going to kick myself for this later-" Zoro cursed his curiosity under his breath before addressing the wolfman, "Luffy…mind sharing how you're not in a similar state as the rest of us?"
"Hmm? Oh I was desensitized to all that back when I was uh…" All those aboard Merry's deck found themselves dropping their jaws, twitching their eyes, and paling eggshell white as Luffy's fingers were still around the single digits…and they weren't rising fast enough for the people's liking. "11 or 12, yeah that sounds about right." Luffy nodded to himself oblivious to the horror settling on all the face's of those around him. Or perhaps the wolfman was just ignoring them without caring for their reaction to his revelation. Probably the latter.
"There was this weirdly shaped guy with a bright blue afro running around with a full face of black mascara in a dominatrix outfit. Kept going around town and acting overdramatically with every single thing he did…He also stripped at one point although I don't think he realized he was still visible to the public." The nonchalance in how Luffy told the gut wrenching tale only served to increase the pity those around him felt for the man. Simultaneously, all those aboard save for the wolfman himself spared a moment of silence for the young man's sanity. He hadn't lost it in the Grand Line but in the throes of his youth, not even in his teens. Truly, a sad and pitiful tale indeed.
'Ok this is just ridiculous.' Luffy's blank expression finally broke as his half-lidded gaze somehow became even more lidded as he waved off their antics with an, "Oi! Quit it already ya bloody pack a hammies." Rolling his eyes over their pitying yet amused looks, Luffy got back on track with his next question directed at the agents who were, while also giving him pitying looks, also more than a little lost over the lighthearted mood that had quickly descended upon those amongst the deck. "Why exactly are you both in Baroque Works?"
'And they look even more lost now, joy.' Luffy thought sarcastically as the dumbfounded looks on 5 and Valentine's face increased in intensity. "You don't strike me as particularly evil, certainly not angels, but not evil. What made the two of you end up taking jobs in Baroque Works anyway? You talked about making the world a better place so what? Are you guys going around dealing with despicable people as some sort of redemption or somethin?" Vivi's hands clenched painfully around her arms like a vice.
'Redemption? Ha! Don't make me laugh.' The princess thought spitefully as memories of ruined towns and mass craters were left in the two agents' wake.
5 shifted around from his position before the Straw Hat before shrugging, "Yeah something like that. Got involved with some bad crowds back in the South Blue. Made mistakes…" The bomb man winced as if recalling a painful memory. "Mistakes that cost me the road to what I really wanted to become." From his side, Valentine sighed before nodding and agreeing along with her partner.
"Mr. 5 and I are in much the same boat." The kilo woman's eyes glazed over, clearly somewhere else entirely mentally. "We got along great as partners not just because of Devil Fruit powers synergizing with one another but because we also had a common reason for joining Baroque Works. A financial break…and as you said, redemption." Vivi twitched and a crack was heard by the man carrying out the interrogation next to her. Luffy made no comment on the ticking time bomb that had been triggered nor did he have any plans on intervening with the princess if she decided to lay in on the agents before them…not yet anyway.
"Well, penance would be a better word to describe it really. The both of us joined Baroque Works so we could get the finances to achieve our true goals in life while also wiping our slate clean in the process. A fresh…start…" Valentine trailed off when both she and 5 were suddenly left sweating profusely at the sight of a princess known for being a kind, gentle, understanding, and forgiving individual who was now staring down at them like they were trash. Not it wasn't even trash, their mere existence seemed like it offended her at this point.
"Penance?" The whisper spoken with incredulity was as loud and deafening as a point blank shotgun blast. A pulse of…something passed through Valentine and 5, who despite knowing that the princess was far from capable of defeating the two of them in sheer power, now seemed to approach them with the force of all the deserts of Alabasta. A swirling sandstorm that threatened to overwhelm completely and utterly without even a shred of remorse. "Murdering my people is penance? Desecrating their homes is penance? Making a mockery out of life is PENANCE?!" The princess wasn't aware of just what she was doing to the agents before her or the people behind her. She wasn't aware that in her rage she was not only imposing her oppressive will upon 5 and Valentine but her own people as well. Amongst the soldiers who'd been sent by the fake King, only Melissa was left standing, the others had long fallen to their knees and even they were struggling to keep awake. Igaram fared little better than Melissa, it was only due to his long life and experiences with individuals who possessed similar powers that allowed him to not tremble as the young blonde woman was next to him.
Contrasting the Alabastans who struggled under their monarch-to-be's power and the agents who seemed close to being crushed under an invisible weight like they were nothing more than insects, the Straw Hats only seemed mildly bothered by the princess's will. Perhaps if they had come to the Grand Line under a different captain they would be in similar states as the Alabastans, but alas they were under the command of Monkey D. Luffy, and despite the princess's rage, her will simply could not compare to his own. A fact that was made evident not long after. "You are both nothing more than butchers! Murderers! You snuff out the lives of those who are just for the sake of this penance you seek but all you do is carve out the path for the-the DISEASE that plagues my kingdom! The bastard who we believed had come to bring us hope by returning with our lost treasure and protecting us was nothing more than scum! This idol, this Mr. 0 you serve is nothing more than an infestation that has come to lay waste to my home! You want penance? You should have found it somewhere, ANYWHERE, other than that two-faced, good for nothing, sentient piece of leather! You wanted redemption? You only damned yourselves to the deepest bowels of hell when you accepted that devil's deal! You cursed yourselves the moment you became nothing more than pawns for the Warlord CROCODILE!"
Luffy smirked seeing the blood drain out of the two agents' faces, or what had been left to drain out anyway after the initial verbal onslaught, when they registered the fact that Mr. 0's identity had just been revealed to them. They only seemed to pale further however when the ramifications hit them like a runaway stampede of Dawn Island megafauna. The man who's orders they'd been carrying out was none other than Desert King Crocodile. A pirate known for his ambition, his drive towards making himself powerful no matter the cost so that one day he could avenge himself against one particular Emperor of the Sea. A demon who was feared for his ruthlessness, meticulousness, and most of all, his complete lack of empathy or love for the people. If the man who they'd been serving was in fact Desert King, Sir Crocodile…then instead of wiping their slates clean they did little more than drown themselves in even more sins.
The wolfman wouldn't lie. The princess before him was becoming more and more interesting the more time he spent around her. What he once believed to be nothing more than a righteous naive princess, who was willing to carry the burden of saving her whole kingdom even if it cost her, her life was showing that she wasn't as angelic as many made her out to be. Case in point, the fact that she had yet to stop making her way to 5 and Valentine, and this time, with one of her Peacock Slasher's in hand. A weapon similar to that of a rope and dagger, and just like a rope and dagger, it was more than enough to kill someone. Luffy couldn't have that now could he? Especially when 5 and Valentine said those very specific words. Before the wolfman could intercept the princess from doing something she was likely going to regret for the rest of her life and cost him very intriguing additions to his collection however, both he and Vivi froze as the giggles of a woman reached their ears. Giggles that came from the railing near a certain orange haired woman's Mikan Trees.
"My my, you certainly let the cat out of the bag there, Princess Nefertari." Luffy was immediately on guard against the woman who was smiling down at them all as if they were nothing more than children. It wasn't the condescending, or more accurately amused older sister looks, living with Makino proved that there was such a look, look she was giving them all that put the wolfman off however.
No, it was the fact that the woman in a bold cowgirl ensemble that comprised of a violet cleavage-exposing corset and matching miniskirt along with a white cowboy hat and white high-heeled boots had made her appearance on the deck without him noticing her presence until she wanted all of them to know. It wasn't long before the wolfman relaxed however when he finally did recognize who the woman was, of course this reaction to recognizing exactly who the woman was, was exclusive only to the wolfman himself. "I do believe you've just signed your former colleagues' death warrants. How, fufu, unfortunate."
The sadistic glee the cowboy suited woman had no problems flaunting just caused the bomb man and kilo woman bound just a few feet below her to go hysteric. The moments of overwhelming guilt and revulsion from the earlier revelation were replaced with fear. They were still ashamed, deeply so, but the fact that death's maiden was currently eyeing them like her latest treat served to shove those feelings far back into their minds.
The soldiers of Alabasta and the majority of the Straw Hats noted 5 and Valentine's fear for a moment but switched their attention over to the two individuals who had infiltrated Baroque Works, individuals who were not only very much aware of who the woman was, but also what she had done to their people, and unlike the bounded agents on the deck, the devil above knew exactly who she was serving.
5 and Valentine hadn't even realized that the tide of torrential fury that threatened to swallow them whole had vanished completely. At least until it came back with a force that even Luffy was taken surprised by. Vivi's will that already felt like it carried the full force of the deserts of Alabasta had become to feel like it was all the deserts of Paradise had fallen under her control. A power so great that 5 and Valentine actually found themselves having difficulties breathing…yet the demoness above only blinked in mild surprise before she giggled, giggled in the face of Vivi's wrath. "Don't hurt yourself trying, Princess Nefertari. You may end up a shriveled old hag, flesh rotting and sloughing off your body before you could even phase me with that power."
'Looks check. Ussop opposed humor?'
"That is disgusting and disturbing on so many levels." Tengu shuddered from his spot behind Sanji and Zoro, the former surprisingly not busting out about 'Mellorines' for once but leveling a cool, blank stare on the cowgirl. The latter sporting much the same look with his hands resting over his blades. It was this scene that had Nami realizing and musing that Zoro and Sanji actually could read the mood when it mattered.
'Also check.'
"Miss All Sunday." The princesses' venom could have melted through Sea Stone as she looked just about ready to commit murder. "What are you doing here?"
The cowgirl blinked at the princess innocently, tapping her chin with her finger and looking thoughtfully in an overly dramatic fashion, "Oh nothing much. Just out for some fresh air." The princess grit her teeth in response to All Sunday's mocking. Igaram himself looked just about ready to step forward and attack the woman but stopped himself when the demoness opened her mouth again, this time addressing the shivering themselves shitless duo of 5 and Valentine. "How does it feel, Gem? Mikita?"
Both agents froze when the woman called them by their real names. If she knew who they were beyond Baroque Works…she also likely knew about the ones they wanted far away from this life. "H-How does w-what feel, Miss All Sunday?" Gem asked, stuttering but actually able to get the sentence out unlike his partner who was frozen like a statue. Understandable considering she had more to lose than he did if her personal life was common knowledge than him.
Miss All Sunday giggled before responding, "Fufufu, how does it feel knowing that you put innocent people only out doing an honest living six feet under?" Mikita choked and Gem looked like he had just been sucker punched. "Knowing that you've made sons yearn for their father's warmth, made daughters depressed over not having their mother's guiding hand, made wives' look to the door day after day, fervently hoping that somehow their dead, rotting corpse of a lover might return and it was all a dream, made husbands' fall into the depths of sorrow at the bottom of a bottle, slowly but surely driving themselves further and further into the ground, subconsciously granting themselves their wish for having their obliterated, mangled wives back by their sides. How does it feel knowing you've become what you sought to forever avoid?"
By the end of Sunday's question, Gem was a broken man, his mind lost in an internal rollercoaster of self-loathing and suicidal depression. Mikita was arguably worse, where Gem had been left stunned to silence, she was driven to hysterics, laughing and crying mutterring over and over again that the demoness was lying, that she wasn't a cold blooded murderer of innocents, she made the world a safer place didn't she? After all Mr. 0 promised that everyone they killed was- "How does it feel knowing you carved out a body of corpses for Crocodile to walk upon towards his own twisted ambitions?" That was the final nail in the coffin that left both Gem and Mikita dangling over the edge.
"Fufufufu, now that they've been…prepared, I suppose I should switch over to you, Princess Nefertari." The younger woman flinched back, her earlier anger having dissipated slightly because of the demoness' words but she glared scornfully and defiantly nonetheless. "Your father has been replaced by Mr. 2, Bon Clay. An agent who is currently making a mockery of your Great father's public image quite sporadically, though I wouldn't say it's much of an accomplishment." Vivi bristled at the perceived insinuation, as did every other Alabastans present. "Bon Clay is just acting like himself for the most part. Spouting off days on end about the inequality and oppression that okama's feel and the need for the Okama Queen Emporio Ivankov to return are the only things he hasn't done since the King was moved from the palace."
Vivi was still quietly seething but her anger was cut short when she noticed her choice of words, the woman said moved from the palace, not removed or dealt with. "Oh, your father is very much alive and-" The princess's glare returned when the woman took a moment to pause, "Hmm, well to say he is doing quite nicely for himself would be a bit of a stretch but he hasn't been turned into a soulless husk, fufu."
Vivi snarled in response, "If my father doesn't return safely, I will have you hanged even if it's the last thing I do you despicable wench!" Each word that came out the princess's mouth carried the weight of her will, her wrath. But none of it even phased Miss All Sunday who just gave the princess one last smile before turning from Vivi to the man who actually did have the best chance at killing her.
'Well, realistically I don't have even a smidgen of a chance of survival if I ever go against him. He would decimate and devour me in the time it took to blink if he was really interested in ending my life.' Miss All Sunday mused to herself, letting out another giggle which only served to piss off the Alabastans as they misinterpreted her amusement. Vivi and Igaram were seconds away from attacking the woman where she sat, the only thing stopping them was the fact that any damage done to the Straw Hat's ship would likely end badly for them. Very badly. "It is a pleasure to finally meet you in person." Sunday greeted the wolfman, even going so far as to tip her cowboy hat in…respect?!
The woman's sudden show of courtesy stumped her former colleagues who had never seen or heard her show an ounce of respect in her life, even to Crocodile!
"You have your father's eyes." The wolfman's eye twitched at the comparison as he stepped forward, coming closer to the sadistically gleeful demoness. "Similar to your brother's in fact. The smart one I mean, not the mindless simpleton." Her next comments elicited a snort from Luffy but surprised looks from Nami and the rest of the crew while the Alabastans began eyeing the two other groups warily. Crocodile's right hand woman seemed to be awfully close to the wolfman's family. Whilst, Igaram and Vivi mentally began to fear and prepare for the worst, Nami turned to Zoro and whispered,
"Has Luffy mentioned anything to you about this, All Sunday?"
The swordsman shook his head before responding, "I was going to ask you the same question actually." The wolfman hadn't been as open as he usually was with what he had planned. Whatever it was that the Unluckies had informed him off was still unknown to them, but both Zoro and Nami were willing to bet it all centered around Miss All Sunday. Turning to see what Usopp and Sanji's reactions were to Luffy's behavior, both the swordsman and navigator sweatdropped as their cook was being throttled by their panicking, tengu who was more than a little green around the gills, more than likely over the horrific imagery All Sunday was spouting off. "100 Berries says that Sanji just started making googly eyes at the cowgirl just to get Usopp's mind off of her…in a sense."
Nami snorted in response to Zoro's whisper, "Suckers bet. I don't know why his chosen method of trying to get our minds off things is acting like a perv but…I can't deny that it works." Both Nami and Zoro rolled their eyes as the cook gave them thumbs ups from behind his back where the marksman couldn't see. He was weird…but that just meant he fit right in with the rest of Luffy's weirdass crew.
Vivi eyed Luffy and Miss All Sunday wearily as the two smiled amicably towards each other, like old friends or business associates meeting over a cup of coffee. "So, Miss All Sunday, I have…2 questions for you." The woman raised an eyebrow at the lack of there being more but never once did she let her gleeful smile slip, even as she gestured for him to continue, "Firstly, just how much do you know about me? You clearly know my…father and my brothers so you must either be a lot better as an investigator than I first gave you credit for…or you're in a lot deeper of an involvement with my family than I was led to believe."
Miss All Sunday's response was only to shrug, indicating that it could be either or, or perhaps even both, who knows? "Secondly, aside from intelligence gathering and possibly spy work, what else could you offer during your stay in my crew? And for that matter, how long will you be staying with the crew?" Neither Luffy nor Robin reacted to the angry squawks from Vivi, the thankful cheers of Sanji, or the terrified protests followed by another round of irate throttling of the Straw Hats' cook by Usopp.
All Sunday hummed thoughtfully, weighing the pros and cons of the wolfman's proposal…before breaking character for a moment, just a moment, with saddened, tired eyes and a hint of a broken soul. For the split second that her mask broke, Luffy clenched his fists and ground his teeth. He recognized that look. He saw it everyday for 7 years. Covering up the slip with a chuckle, All Sunday looked at the sky wistfully as she answered him, "After the sands settle, and I find that which I seek, you won't see me ever again." The demoness sighed out deeply before returning to face the wolfman with her gleeful smile and just a hint of sadism, or teasing. Honestly it wasn't all that different from Makino's when the woman was in the mood to get a rise out of him. "And in regards to just how much I know about you, specifically, fufu, let's just say I am more than well aware of how ravenous you truly are, Úlfr."
Nami mouthed the strange word over to Zoro in question but only received a shrug in return, sighing she turned to Sanji to see if he would be of any help only to be taken aback as all the cook's philandering persona vanished like the wind. Seems like whatever Úlfr meant, it was something big enough that it gave the skirt chasing cook a pause. "Sanji?"
"She knows." Two words. Two simple words had never caused Nami's breath to hitch and her skin to pale as much as they did now. 'She knew.' Whoever this woman was, she knew exactly what kind of monster Luffy had reigned inside of him…and she was able to stay calm and even give off a teasing older sister vibe throughout their entire conversation. Miss All Sunday was either very brave, and very stupid, to act like a bitch in front of Luffy…or she had just enough strength to back up her attitude. Nami didn't like how much she doubted it was the former.
Luffy smirked, not phased in the slightest over being called Úlfr. Of course this was only thanks to the fact that he himself was also very much privy to just who Miss All Sunday really was. Chuckling as a breeze kicked up and caused their hair to flow with it, Luffy spoke and Miss All Sunday was the one to flinch. "Like the wind, death is always by your side, isn't it?" One moment he was on Merry's deck, the next he was standing right behind the demoness who stiffened as he whispered into her ear. "Yцелевший."
Miss All Sunday breathed shakily for a few moments as she suddenly felt like nothing more than a cute, little, feeble, helpless, pathetic passerine bird…under the twisted, ravenous, jaws of a wolf. The demoness swallowed nervously as unlike the mere tickles of will Vivi had tried to subdue her with just moments earlier, she was now shivering under a true Conqueror's gaze. "You…You are well informed, Mr.-"
"Luffy will do."
"Luffy." Miss All Sunday corrected herself, her breathing evening out as the cold hands of death receded. With a cough, the cowgirl jumped off the railing and landed right before Gem and Mikita who recoiled from the sound of her boots hitting the deck only a foot away from them. "If either of you are actually interested in paying for your sins, both old and newly discovered. I would advise you to stick to the Straw Hats like glue until everything comes to pass, that is, until the events unfolding in Alabasta come to an end."
Both agents stared at her in confusion but she wasn't planning on explaining why such was the case and instead turned to the princess who still eyed her wearily and distrustingly. The two stared at one another for a little longer before Miss All Sunday turned to Igaram instead, "You, your soldiers, and the blonde blunder make your way to the mountains behind Arbana. The people I've been sent to deal with personally, as well as whoever I was close enough to reach, are all waiting there. Yes, they are alive and well." Without another word, dumbfounded sputtering doesn't count as words, Miss All Sunday jumped off the Going Merry and onto a massive turtle, turning back to wave goodbye to the wolfman, ignoring the tengu-
"How do we keep missing things like this?" Usopp got a karate chop to the head and a murmur of it not being the time to discuss it from an annoyed Nami.
-before speaking, "You may be powerful, Devourer, but power isn't everything. Remember that when you face off against Sir Crocodile." Luffy opened his mouth to retort only for an explosion a few miles away to have him flinch and turn to the rising smoke with an incredulous look. A look that became an amused one when he heard the clicking of camera shutters. 13 and Friday were not only taking pictures of what had once been the ship used by Melissa Bright and her crew, but also of the Straw Hats, and the two bound agents aboard. "I do need to bring some proof to Crocodile that I dealt with Igaram at the very least. Just be glad I decided to stop by and explain a bit instead of blowing the ship up with him in it and letting him figure things out on his own." Miss All Sunday yelled back with a smile that said she also blew up the ship for her own amusement. Damn witch.
Luffy had a chuckle over the woman's blatant show of mischief but his amusement was cut short as he heard a woman coughing rather loudly. Clearly not in the 'I am sick' kind. Luffy licked his lips, took a deep breath, and turned to see Vivi glaring at him so venomously it was like she was trying to punch a hole through his skull with nothing but her eyes. The pirate wouldn't be surprised if she actually was trying to do just that.
"Luffy. I do believe you have much to tell me."
Fuck. Vivi could be crushed in zero seconds flat without the wolfman even breaking a sweat but god damn did she remind him of Makino whenever he, Ace or Sabo fucked up royally.