10. Waking up never felt more pleasant than that particular….

Waking up never felt more pleasant than that particular morning. The sunlight warmed them as they lay in an intimate heap, hairs tickling each other's noses. He grunted and she couldn't help but grin. He opened one eye to look at her, his mind suddenly alert.

Then his arm snaked around her more thoroughly and he squeezed her into his chest, holding her possessively. She giggled. He silenced her with kisses, hands slowly reaching more intimate places and she felt her heartbeat speed up and her breath hitching. It was his turn to grin.

They fell into an easy routine after that. Training, patrolling, missions, late night dinners on the engawa, star gazing, drinking sake with Hashirama. She was happy and it felt like home. He felt like home.

And then there was that day in spring, when she approached Tobirama through a mass of Senju, Uchiha and other clan members. She wore a white traditional kimono which made her hair stand out like a beacon. Tobirama was standing stoic at the end of the path, his brother next to him. For once he was not wearing armor or shinobi clothes. His face was stern, like always. His emotionless eyes followed her approach, until her last steps.

For a few fleeting moments she saw his facade crumbling, eyes full with emotions that he could not speak and almost dared not feel.

With a shaking hand he took hers, leaned over and whispered in her ear: "I am never going to let you go, kunoichi."

Over her shoulder he saw the Uchiha's and chuckled to himself. He stood straight and looked at her, marvelling at her beauty. She was grinning at him while she whispered in his ear:

"You know I love you, silly Senju…". His face flushed and a small tear leaked from the corner of his eye.

For the private dinner in the evening together with Hashirama, she wore a willowgreen kimono with a gold, red and pink embroidered obi. When she entered the room, Tobirama could only stare at her, face flushed, not able to talk, until his brother nudged him with his elbow in his side.

They were tired from the day, slowly eating the simple but delicate dishes that the cooks prepared, sipping sake. After a while they took their leave from Hashirama, retiring to Tobirama's quarters. They walked through the garden in the moonlight. He held his hand out for her, while she stepped on the stone and onto the engawa. He pulled her close to him and suddenly she felt some apprehension. This was their wedding night, her first wedding night.

He said: "Why did you change kimonos?"

She smiled softly: "Well, the wedding kimono was for the clans and our official marriage in the outside world. But this kimono…" She softly caressed his lips with her own. "This kimono…. this one is only for you."

He looked startled and then seriously at her. He took a deep shaking breath.

"Arigato…. you were beautiful this afternoon, but tonight you are absolutely stunning….Sakura…" he whispered her name in her ear, giving her goosebumps.

"I think I want to unpack my gift now…", he grinned in her neck. She smiled at him and turned around so he could reach the obi better.

"By all means, my husband, unpack your gift…"

Life didn't change after that. The only thing that changed was their feelings for each other. Their love grew deeper every day and that sometimes frightened her. The more she loved him, the more scared she was that it would all go away. The circumstances of her arrival in this time never left the back of her mind, or his for that matter. She had a deep fear that she would one day disappear and wake up on that battlefield in the future. They talked about that from time to time, but Tobirama felt helpless in consoling her since he had the same fears as she did.

And then, after a year of married life, their worst fear became reality. She just disappeared one day. And it broke him. Just as sudden as she appeared in his life, she left. He knew that it was not voluntary. She loved him, he did not doubt it. Still, he knew that she did not belong in his time. It was a constant nagging feeling in the back of his mind. But he never wanted to believe that she would return to her time nevertheless.

He lost some days when it happened. His only recollection was darkness, pain, breaking wood, trees, running, crying, clawing in the earth and then apathy. Staring into the skies, lying on the ground feeling the cold seep into his body and bones, feeling the wind and rain. He wanted to end the pain and to exist no more. He did not want to recollect himself. But then his brother found him and picked him up, nursing him back to health. He did not have to ask, he knew and he felt his brother's pain like it was his own.

While he was physically mended, Hashirama knew that something in him was broken that he could not heal. He could only watch over him, suffering, since there was nothing he could do. He saw his beloved little brother working day and night, brooding at night on the roof of his house, taking unnecessary risks in any battle that he could find. He was broken. He did not speak her name. He did not shed one tear. He closed a part of himself for good.

It made him into a harsh Hokage. The death of Hashirama was the only event that managed to shake him. It gave him a purpose and he welcomed that. Even though he was devastated yet again by losing his last loved one, it saved him in a strange way. He became Hokage and he found some remnants of some other kind of love yet again in his heart. He loved his Konoha and his people with all his might. He gave all of himself to make sure the next generation would inherit his will of fire and keep the peace.

He built a hospital that would be worthy of 'her'. Her. He did not want his mind wandering there any longer than necessary. Not thinking about her pink locks, her fiery kicks in training, her slender hard body underneath him… her moans. No. Her witty remarks, and her smile, only for him. No..

When the day came that he was trapped with his students. He chose death over life easily. It was only logical. His students needed to survive, Konoha needed to survive. The will of fire had to pass on to the coming generations. And he would give his life for that.

Still, secretly he welcomed death. The long night where there would be no pain, no thoughts of her and what might have been. With his last breath he whispered her name….. and then there was nothing.

Edo Tensei is a dangerous technique, but Orochimaru performed it effortlessly and carelessly. His death felt like just moments ago and here he was in the Uchiha tomb, with his brother, Hiruzen and the Fourth Hokage, the Fourth! His mind worked furiously. He was alive once more and seemed to be brought back in the future. Hiruzen was old. While the conversations moved on he walked towards the wall and pressed his thumb and fingers to it. His hands sweating, heart hammering in his chest. He sent out his chakra. And there he felt it, her chakra!