18. The moment the ANBU entered his office to report...

When the ANBU entered his office to report on the presence of Haruno Sakura in Konoha, Uchiha Sasuke followed the news like a shadow. Kakashi felt intense relief to learn of her return. Tension that had been accumulating over the past year seemed to evaporate all of a sudden, making him feel shaky. He had discussed this outcome of events endlessly with Tsunade and the Nidaime. But theorising about her return and trying to have faith in the outcome never really silenced the constant nagging doubt in the back of his head. Knowing that their theory was right felt like a moment of absolute euphoria.

Sasuke stood silently leaning against the wall, his face impassive, seemingly unmoved by the course of events, but Kakashi saw through his empty facade. The Uchiha felt something for her, that much was clear. It made Kakashi wary. Who knows what was going on in that thick skull of his. He could not be sure, but he was certain that Naruto would be less than pleased if that old burn would ignite once again.

He ordered ANBU guards to post on the roof of her apartment until she rested enough to seek Tsunade out, for he was certain that she would go to her mentor first. He would give her this night and the next day to adjust. If she did not come forth, he would seek her out himself. He did not want to distrust her, but protocols had to be followed: not debriefed, she was a potential liability. She needed to be interrogated to rule out any possible threat.

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Sakura sought Tsunade out early the next morning. Beams of sunlight fell on the floor of the empty hospital hallway and for a moment she just stood there, taking in the appearance of her shishou. An intense emotion crossed Tsunade's face and in an instance she took Sakura into a bearhug, trying to mask the tears that escaped her eyes. Evelopped in her warmth and scent instead of being hit with her fists for a change, Sakura could not stop laughing nor crying.

After the first shock passed, Tsunade sat her down in her office, pressing her into a chair with force, handing her tissue's and urging her to spill her ordeal. And that she did. It felt good to be with someone that she really trusted and reveal everything that happened to her without holding back. She talked all morning, drinking tea while Tsunade sipped sake. Only when she revealed her relationship with Tobirama did she feel awkward, realising that she was facing Tobi's grand niece.

But Tsunade took the news calm, taking in her words with an open mind. And Sakura felt her awkwardness fall away quickly. She did remark on her marriage though: "You know… I asked my uncle once why he never got married."

She looked up: "And? What did he answer?"

"He said that he was too busy to get married. I would not have dreamt that he actually hid this story from me! It explains his stern countenance over the years. He rarely smiled."

"Never smiled?"

"No, he was a stern man, all my childhood friends were scared of him. He lived only for the wellbeing of the village. There was only duty, never relaxation or having fun other than training until you ended up in the hospital or unconscious on the ground. There was not much love in his life, especially not after my grandfather died. Although he had a soft spot for me of course. I loved him very much."

She sighed: "The only love that he allowed into his heart was love for the village. And I think that his death was a conscious choice in the end, not a necessity."

"You mean… ", Sakura stammered horrified.

"I mean that if he fought alongside his students, I think they all would have survived. But facing them alone, was a calculated and conscious suicidal choice. I think he welcomed the opportunity to end his grief. That night felt like the opportunity that he had waited for. His students had become full grown shinobi. It was the best moment to make sure the right student became Hokage, to see all of them safe and most important, to plant the Will of Fire firmly within their hearts by giving the right example."

Sakura said bitterly: "The right example? Suicide to deflect life?"

"No, to treasure the village and its inhabitants above his own life."

She fell silent. "You make it sound like a dishonest scheme."

"Well, this scheming was part of his being. He always had a plan behind a plan, that man. He was intelligent and cunning. His objective was honest, otherwise he would have died long before that moment. But he wasn't selfish enough for that. He just saw an opportunity to do the right thing and at the same time find peace for himself. His job was done. That is how he saw it, I am sure of it."

Sakura felt a tear escaping her eye. She bowed her head, feeling an intense pain. How could he have died like that? How could he close himself off from life like that? It felt as if she was listening to another man's end, this was not her Tobi as she remembered him, her husband that had held her in his arms, only a few days ago. He was so full of love, strength and courage. It seemed that her disappearance caused him to fear life itself. It pained her, realising what had happened to him in the end, how he chose his death. She squeezed her hands into fists in her lap, pressing her nails into her palms.

When her distress lessened she said softly: "He wasn't always like that, Shishou. When I met him, he was young. Even though he was smarter and more serious and responsible than his brother, he still enjoyed life intensely. Even though there were mainly duties to perform, he fulfilled them with enormous energy and motivation and whenever there was an opportunity he would find joy in life. That is how I remember him: as a force of life. And he had an endless energy to make life better for everyone. He pushed me to my limits, teased me without remorse and he loved me with the same intensity that he loved life." she started to cry again in earnest. "Shishou… I lost him….and to hear how he lived his life without me feels like torture… I don't know what to do….."

Tsunade stood abruptly, frustrated and pained that she could not take away her apprentice's grief, because of her sworn secrecy to that same uncle. Curse that old man and his uptight strategies. Some vague part of her understood that he wanted to inform her himself, but still… The amount of hurt that Sakura displayed was tangible. There was no deceit in the girl, she was honest and herself and she was in pain.

She said gently: "You need to take your time to adjust to this new situation. Let's discuss everything with Kakashi, shall we?." Inside she fumed at her uncle: why did he want to make this so complicated? It was obvious Sakura loved him.

Sakura nodded. Kakashi was Hokage, it would be nice to see her sensei again. But she felt troubled, however open her story to Tsunade was, this small fact she had kept from the older woman. She bit her lip. She was not ready to tell Tsunade or her friends that she was carrying the Nidaime's child.

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Two ANBU and Tsunade escorted her to Kakashi to be debriefed. Uncharacteristically he seemed emotional to see her again; jumping out of his chair giving her a firm hug. When he debriefed her he noticed to his great relief that her story held only minor differences with the Nidaime's version. There was no deceiving intent; not on Sakura's behalf, or that of his predecessor. So he ruffled her hair and dismissed her, ordering her to take rest at her house for a few weeks, before she would take up her hospital or shinobi duties.

He did not disclose the presence of the Nidaime in Konoha on the Nidaime's specific request. Apparently he wanted to approach her in his own way. So he kept his mouth shut even though he noticed her tearful eyes whenever she spoke his name. She was in mourning. It was obvious.

Kakashi still wasn't used to the idea of Sakura being married to the Nidaime Hokage, and her presence in his office magnified the feeling of unease. That village hero was such a stern man. Kakashi was still impressed and somewhat apprehensive of him. He had kept his god-like status and majestic qualities in the mind of Kakashi, which made the idea that he was married to his subordinate freak him out a tad now that he saw her in front of him. This was Sakura, his brilliant genius student. Well he added silently, a genius student that could behave like an absolute child whenever Sasuke was around.

But he must admit that it made sense. She was a formidable kunoichi now, powerful, intelligent and with a brutal strength that made all men in the village cower before her. And she was respected as well, respected as a genius doctor that could handle any disease that was thrown at her and respected as the apprentice of one of the Legendary Sannin.

He sighed when he admitted to himself that she grew up in a physical sense as well: she was a beautiful woman, filled out in all the right places. How would Sasuke react to the news that Sakura was married to the Nidaime? Now that he saw her he just knew, it would cause trouble with the stubborn young man. He suspected that his overly cruel treatment of her over the years was caused by deep feelings on his part. Feelings that he was afraid to disclose or give in to. But Sasuke was a changed man now. How did his feelings for Sakura fit in there? He was an Uchiha. Love and Uchiha's did not fare well.

Xxxxxxx

Tobirama stood in the middle of a mess. Panting. Blood everywhere. Almost no chakra left. He tried one more move to try and cut the last circle of trees that was still standing. And then he felt a familiar chakra heading his way. The morning sun was already at the highest point. He was training for 18 hours straight.

Tsunade entered the circle of trees with an angry face, blocking his pose, preventing his last move. "That is enough uncle. I don't want to carry you all the way back." She looked at him sternly.

He ignored her.

She frowned: "I came to tell you that she is back. But I have a feeling that you already know."

Her fingers were hovering just above his chest, a searching flow of chakra entering him. She tsked a few times and then it was her turn to sigh. "Uncle, you have severe internal damage. Let me heal you."

"Hng.."

He gave in and sat down against a tree trunk, suddenly exhausted. Relishing the cool chakra penetrating his skin and organs. It was no use fighting her.

"Why are you doing this to yourself uncle?"

"She came with that Uchiha brat and he stayed with her in her apartment." Disgust filled his throat and he kept silent.

"I don't know why that makes you almost kill yourself Uncle? If that is the case, why did you not meet with her? You must have sensed her for days..."

He thought about this for a while. Feeling his tissue healing slowly, knitting together. He felt reluctant to disclose his fears and feelings to her. But she felt the closest to him now that Hashirama was dead, so he finally said:"What if she only loved me because Sasuke was not there with her? It seems only logical that now she is back in her own time, that her feelings for him will resurface. I do not want to try and change her mind by force. I want her to choose for herself if she truly loves him or not. I think it is best that she doesn't know I am here for her to be able to do this."

"You are being overly melodramatic, uncle. Just go to her and talk to her! You are torturing her by staying hidden. I have talked to her and Kakashi as well. She is grieving. She hurts as if you were dead! Her voice breaks when she mentions your name.…." She looked at him pleadingly.

He felt his heart still at this. Could that be the case? But he knew what he felt when he was in front of her apartment. He felt two chakra signatures. Why would she invite him to her house when she was grieving over him? Or was he comforting her as a friend?

Tsunade finished healing the internal damage and he stood up slowly, patting the dirt from his clothing. "I will stay away from her for a while, Tsuna. Just to let her make up her mind for herself."

"That is just not fair uncle, since she doesn't know that you are here. There is no choice for her to make!"

He said angrily and with authority: "This is how it will be done, Hime! I will not try to guide her heart with my presence. If she finds happiness with him. Then so be it."