This chapter is a long one but I decided it was best to keep it all as one chapter. If you haven't noticed, each chapter covers one day. Being the quasi-perfectionist I am, I had to make sure the timing and events all worked out exactly right. for the timing to be correct, there will be two more chapters after this so i'll be torturing Nanao and Shunsui for a bit longer.
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Today Matsumoto was going to spy on her friend. Well, spying was a harsh word; she preferred to think of it as protecting her friend. After a brief appearance at her desk this morning, she came up with an excuse to leave the building before her taichou had even come in. It might have been overkill, seeing as her captain rarely expected her before 11am, but she didn't feel like trying to spy on Nanao and avoiding an angry Hitsugaya at the same time. Of course, everyone knew where an angry Hitsugaya was because the air temperature there was at least 20 degrees cooler than anywhere else in Seireitei. It would be an unneeded complication best taken care of with a little forethought. And if Nanao caught her spyi — protecting her, things could get a bit messy on that front, too. No, messy didn't cover it. Catastrophic? Not quite. Destructive would be more accurate.
Stifling a yawn Matsumoto watched from the roof as Nanao started her day. An hour spent in her office before inspecting the day's training exercises for another hour. She then returned to her office and reappeared with a pile of papers. Everything looked perfectly normal to Matsumoto and nothing deviated from Nanao's regular routine. Except…
From Matsumoto's viewing spot on the roof, she saw a lone shinigami rush down the corridor to help Nanao with her files. After a short verbal exchange, Nanao allowed the shinigami to carry her papers for her. They conversed quite a bit on their way to the first division to receive the day's assignments and Matsumoto even saw Nanao flash a smile every now and then. Could this be the guy? If she changed perspectives and squinted she could barely make out his face. Ah, she was pretty sure it was one of the new academy graduates assigned to the 5th division.
When Nanao reappeared from first division's offices, the young man helped her carry the new papers back to the 8th division. And again, Matsumoto saw Nanao smile occasionally. This must be the guy.
The sudden drop in temperature signaled to Matsumoto that her captain was near and was rather upset about something or other. Most likely it was something she'd done or forgotten to do. Definitely time to declare this a successful mission and abandon her post before discovered.
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He found her bent over her desk, surrounded by paperwork. The pages were all arranged in folders stacked in careful piles and completed with her small precise handwriting. Her glasses gave her a studious look and her hair was, as usual, held up with a single chopstick. The first time he'd seen it down he was struck by the length and beauty of the dark brown strands.
"Nanao-chan, why must you wear your hair up all the time?" He asked. "It makes you even more beautiful when you leave it down!"
"When I leave it down, it gets in the way when I'm working, which is what you should be doing right now." She said, pointedly. While she fussed to return her hair to its place, he slipped out of the office, leaving her with the paperwork.
But he never forgot how beautiful she was with her hair down and since then, he had delighted in stealing the stick or clips that held her hair up. It was just something else he did to annoy her to no end.
Sneaking up behind her, he leaned over her shoulder so see what she was writing. Her pen was held motionless, still poised over the page. Although she was looking at it, it was obvious that she wasn't thinking about those forms.
"More reports I see, my dear Nanao-chan." He whispered in her ear as he slipped the stick out of her hair. Nanao, who had actually been daydreaming about him, jumped. Her hair, that had been held up so perfectly, fell down across her shoulders. She stood quickly, knocking her chair over. He stepped back, surprised at her reaction. "Were you day-dreaming Nanao-chan?" He asked, playfully. "I trust I was a part of them. Perhaps you were thinking of pinning me to the desk and having your wicked way with me?"
Damn it, now she was going to have that image popping up in a dream tonight. Just what she didn't need right now.
"Nothing of the sort." She said scornfully. "I was just fantasizing that you were actually doing paperwork voluntarily." Well, the fantasizing part was right, but paperwork was now the last thing on her mind. Her face flushed lightly with embarrassment. She glanced up at him, but couldn't bring herself to meet his eyes, knowing when she looked into them, they wouldn't show the emotions she had been dreaming about.
"I – I'm late for a meeting." She said guiltily as she righted her chair. Once she'd gathered up her book and a handful of paperwork, she dashed out of the room, her long hair steaming behind her.
Disappointed, Shunsui watched her leave in her flustered state. She hadn't even stopped to retrieve her hairclip from him and she was never flustered. Her composure had always been a constant, whether fighting a Hollow or arguing with him. Was she really thinking about her new boyfriend that much? With a sigh, he sat at his own desk but instead of looking at the pile of paperwork before him, he stared at her empty desk at the other end of the office. I will have to get used to it soon, he rationalized. She won't want to spend all of her time here if someone is waiting for her elsewhere.
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Nanao raced down the corridor, not quite running but definitely not walking. She made it to her room and closed the door behind her. Sinking to the floor, the papers fell from her arms and slid across the floor. Her book hit the floor with a solid thump.
What was going on with her? She wanted to scream and cry at the same time. Not only had she been thinking of him, she had been contemplating how his lips would feel when pressed to hers. What it would it feel like to have his fingers stroking her skin ever so carefully, starting with her cheeks, running down her neck, over the sides of her breasts, her stomach and her hips. To be held, pressed as close as possible to his body, resting her head on his chest, feeling it expand and contract with every breath.
Pressing her back against the wall and pulling her knees to her chest, she squeezed her eyes tight and tried to think what she would say to him the next time she saw him. He could easily find out she really didn't have a meeting and demand an explanation, and she would have to come up with an excuse. How could her thoughts have strayed from work? The dreams were bad enough, but now her imagination was running wild during working hours. But the dreams were so real, so emotional and so physical; she felt exhausted and drained when she awoke from a night's sleep.
She could still remember the feeling of his hands as they ran across her bare skin. His lips gliding along her collarbone, running up her neck and behind her ear where he stopped to nibble on her earlobe. It made her chest ache in longing.
No! With a kick, her book went skidding across the floor to crush several papers against the wall. She had to stop herself from thinking about him! He's her taicho and they need to work together! It's not right! Besides, he didn't feel the same way about her because he had Matsumoto. If she was in a competition with Rangiku for his love, it would be over before it even started and she was jealous of that.
She closed her eyes and curled up tighter, furious with herself for allowing her imagination to run wild like this. No matter what she did, she couldn't get him out of her mind. The more she tried to think of other things, the more her mind ended up back with him.
She was so tired; maybe she was tired enough she wouldn't dream this time. If she was starting to daydream about him then even staying awake would no longer provide any sanctuary. She had to find a way to keep those dreams out of an office setting. If all she could think about when she went into the office was being with him, she would never get any work done.
Perhaps bringing it out in the open would help. Yes, she would tell him about her silly dreams and then they would get better. He would tell her that he had no such feelings for her and she could get on with her life, such as it was. The dreams couldn't get worse, could they? Tonight, she'd go to his favorite bar, perhaps have a few drinks with him and tell him of her problem.
In the meantime, she would try to complete some of the paperwork she had brought with her to her room.
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"I don't know his name because he's just one of the new graduates that joined the 5th division. I think I saw him come into the bar earlier." Scanning the crowd, Matsumoto spotted him and pointed him out to Shunsui. "That's the one."
"I think I'm going to need to have a talk with him."
"Are you sure that's wise?"
"I won't harm the boy I just want to warn him, because if he hurts my Nanao-chan, I will skin him alive, soak him in wasabi and leave him for hollow-bait."
Matsumoto shivered. Although Shunsui was not usually a menacing figure, he was a large man and she had no doubt that not only did he meant what he had said, he would do it too. That might be one of the mildest things he would do to someone who ever hurt Nanao. She watched him make his way over and pull the boy aside. As they conversed, the younger man's face became more and more serious the longer Shunsui talked. By the time they parted, the boy was as white as a sheet of paper.
Shunsui made his way back to his table; his usual flamboyant and lighthearted attitude now gone, replaced by that of a weary, serious and rather tired looking man. Matsumoto passed him another bottle of sake.
"Whatever you said sure seemed to scare that kid."
"It was meant to. I didn't feel like beating around the bush tonight."
"You're taking this rather seriously."
"I suppose I am, but she's my Nanao-chan and I won't let anything happen to her." Sitting rather silent and dejected, the warmth of Matsumoto's hand on his shoulder pulled his gaze from the bottle in front of him.
"Someone needs a hug!" She said in the sugarcoated voice one would use to speak to a baby or small child. Before he knew what was happening, she had wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled his face to her chest. "There, is that better?" She asked as she stroked his hair. A few wolf calls and requests for the same treatment were heard thru the bar.
Shunsui couldn't help but laugh. "Ah, Matsumoto," he mumbled from between her breasts. "You always know how to cheer up a broken-hearted man." Raising his head he decided this would probably be the best time to leave. "Thank you, Ran-chan. I bid you and the girls a goodnight." With slightly higher spirits, a tired smile and a full bottle of sake, he left the bar. They may not be the breasts he had been thinking about, but they were impressive in their own rights. There were many shinigami in the bar that had nightly dreams of such delights.
Once again, she watched the older Shunsui walk away from the table. All of this had hit him harder than she'd thought it would. He really does love her. With a sigh from one well acquainted with unrequited love, she looked around for someone else to drink with. She waved to Hisagi, who grabbed Kira and dragged him over to her table.
With a glance backwards, Shunsui saw Matsumoto waving the boys over. He smiled with the thought that the way she made friends, she would never be alone. Stepping out of the well lit bar into the dark evening, Shunsui bumped into someone.
Nanao. How could he have missed her reiatsu? Perfectly controlled, it felt like a part of him, like a missing piece of a puzzle. They'd made a good team but that was all, he reminded himself. They only worked together.
"My dearest Nanao-chan!' he greeted her warmly. His heart crumbled a little, realizing she must be here to meet that boy. "I'll see you tomorrow, Nanao-chan. Have a good evening." He used shunpo, to quickly leave the area, not wanting to see her happy expression when meeting another man.
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It had taken her all afternoon to work up the nerve to speak with him. She had only glanced thru the doorway when something caught her eye. Her taichou had his face pressed between Matsumoto's breasts! Where everyone in the bar could see! Stunned, she could only stand and watch. Even after he rose, she couldn't believe her eyes. She felt like someone had reached into her chest and was ruthlessly squeezing her heart. She had come here to tell him of her dreams, more for her stress level than for his benefit, but to see him and Matsumoto together like this in public could only mean one thing: they really were a couple.
It wasn't until he bumped into her as he was leaving the bar that she realized she had been blocking the door. The surprised look on his face and his rapid escape told her that talking to him tonight was a bad idea. Without even entering the bar, she turned and walked back to her room. Perhaps it was for the best, after all, she didn't want to come across as some lovesick woman desperate for any tiny amount of affection thrown to her in pity.
She'd told herself years ago, she was not the romantic type. Matsumoto would tell her all about her feelings for Gin, but Nanao never had someone like that in her life. Someone that she cared for, someone she felt like she couldn't live without and wanted to spend forever with. She had told herself she never would, either. She was much too practical and realistic for such silly things. It was a weakness and she didn't allow herself such weaknesses. They were frivolous, unnecessary and something that would only get in the way of her goal of becoming a shinigami.
Damn it, she really did love him. Although it still felt strange, she could now admit this to herself. Except love doesn't conquer all. When morning comes and the light shines on the dream, it disappears; the spell is broken and reality tears that dream apart. All one can do is pick up the shreds of those dreams, hide them away and continue with life.
She wasn't getting enough sleep. How could she when she awoke in a panic from her dreams? It was getting to the point that she was afraid to sleep, afraid that the next dream would go too far. Nanao, a self-disciplined control-freak now found herself at the mercy of her own fantasies. She took the sleeping pill and laid in the dark, praying she wouldn't dream tonight. She couldn't take much more of this. With a sigh, she wondered why it hurt so much to lose something that was only real in her dreams.
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While not exactly drunk, Shunsui wasn't exactly sober either. Even after Matsumoto's version of condolences, he was feeling too depressed to return to the isolation of his room and he no longer enjoyed the levity in the bar. He had run into Nanao but she was obviously at the bar to meet with her new boyfriend. He'd never been able to get her to the bar for a drink with him.
Not wanting to be alone, he decided a visit with his friend Ukitake Jyuushiro was in order. If anyone could cheer him up and help him through this, it would be him. As he carefully walked towards his friend's rooms, he searched for the man's reiatsu. As a captain, Jyuushiro kept his true reiatsu masked at all times, but without a concentrated effort enough leaked for Shunsui to feel it. The closer he got to the 13th division, the stronger Jyuushiro's reiatsu got. He must not be feeling as well today, Shunsui thought when he felt the fluctuations in Jyuushiro's reiatsu. One day he knew his friend would succumb to his illness, but he had been thinking that same thing when they were in school together, unsure he would even make it to graduation. A few thousand years later, he was still able to fight when necessary and Shunsui knew they had many years of friendship ahead. And while Jyuushiro could fight at full strength for short periods of time, he had preferred to develop his mind allowing him to strategize and out think an opponent rather than rely on a purely physical fight. Perhaps Jyuushiro's insight could be of some help tonight.
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"You, my friend, are an idiot. How could you not foresee this?" Jyuushiro asked.
This was not the sort of insight he was hoping for. They were sitting on the engawa, enjoying the night air. Sitting straight-backed, Jyuushiro, covered with a blanket, was sipping his hot medicinal tea. Shunsui was lying on his side, head propped up on his hand and the bottle of sake before him. "It all started as a joke Shiro-chan."
"Yes, most things do with you, don't they?" Jyuushiro poured himself more tea.
"That first day I met her I just did it to see if I could crack that armor of hers."
"Did it work?" Jyuushiro raised an eyebrow.
"No."
"So, of course you had to continue harassing her and she continued to turn you down."
"Of course she did, she's my Nanao-chan! "
"And because she's the only woman who's been able to work with you and not fall into your bed, you find yourself in love with her. Now that she's got a boyfriend, it makes her all the more alluring." With a sigh and another sip of tea, he watched Shunsui. He had never seen his friend this miserable before; he hadn't seen his friend's lazy smile since their greeting. Even when Shunsui failed a test in school or found himself in a messy relationship, it had never rattled him. He had been the one to create this problem and now he had to deal with it. He'd never truly fallen in love with any of those girls he'd chased and caught. It's about time the tables were turned and Ukitake decided he might as well rub it in while he could.
"That's enough wallowing in self-pity, my friend. You are going to go home, go to sleep and tomorrow you will find another girl."
"I can't do that!"
"Why not?" From the corner of his eye, he glanced at Shunsui.
"Its my Nanao-chan!" He said miserably.
"How about Matsumoto?"
"She's fun, but just a friend. She's like you and sees right thru my dramatics. Besides, she's got her own romance going on."
"Oh, with whom?" Ukitake's interest was piqued. After all, once you've known people a few hundred years, you couldn't help but to be interested in their lives. Had she finally found someone else or was she still waiting for Gin's affection.
"Hey, I came here to talk about my problems, not hers!"
"Well, I already told you the best solution I have."
"You're just teasing me, now aren't you?"
"Absolutely."
"What's your real solution?" Shunsui reached for the sake bottle, hoping there was enough for one more cup. Ukitake's hand stopped his arm. Shunsui looked into his friend's now serious face. All amusement between the two had disappeared.
"Find some way to tell her."
"I've been telling her for years!"
"Then you need to try something different."
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Their faces were close enough she could feel his warm breath on her lips and his hand on her cheek. After a moment of hesitation, she realized he was waiting for her to make the first move. Before she could change her mind, she quickly pressed her lips to his. Her insides melted and she deepened the kiss, opening her mouth slightly. His tongue flicked hesitantly at her lips, and realizing she was willing, slipped into her mouth, gently caressing her tongue with his. The way his tongue moved caused shivers to run down her back. She couldn't get enough and she wanted more. She sucked gently on his upper lip as his hands flowed down over the smooth skin of her neck, over her shoulders, stroking her skin through her clothes. A small groan escaped from her throat when his hands stopped and lingered on her breasts. He easily found her erect nipples thru the cloth and gently traced the circle of her areola, not touching the actual tips, merely teasing her. Shivers of pleasure swept thru her with every movement of his hands. Her back arched, trying to push more of her body towards his, giving consent for him to continue exploring her curves.
One of her arms was wrapped around his shoulders while the other hand held the back of his neck. Her fingers played with the band holding his hair back, slowly pulling it out and tossing it aside before spreading his hair across his shoulders. The ends of the silky strands tickled the arm she had wrapped around his back.
His mouth now found the place where her neck and shoulder met and nipped at the fragile skin, making her gasp softly with the new sensation. Her hands flew to his face, pushing his head back so she could see his face. Her hands entered his robe at the neck and slowly worked their way down his bare chest. Her eyes stayed fixed on his face, watching his eyes, studying how they reacted to every movement or sound she made. His emotions clearly flashed thru the expressive brown eyes that she'd watched for so many years and a small smile played across his lips, showing how much he was enjoying the experience.
His lips again sought hers, with a passion that quickly seared through her, leaving her with a satisfied feeling she'd been craving for innumerable years. She relaxed into his embrace, feeling invulnerable in his arms. One of his hands was now stroking her hair, in a soothing manner. Resting with her head on his chest, she wrapped her hands in the cloth of his kimono and breathed in his scent.
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the next chapter will be ready in a couple of days. please review!