...Satoru Iwata. However, no one recognized him. He was in a black suit, and was flanked by…Pikmin? About two dozen were in the bushes, behind trees, and pretty much everywhere. They wore security badges, and had earpieces.

Master Hand, of course, knew him and greeted him elegantly.

"Mister Iwata, how wonderful to see you. May I welcome you and your…staff, into the Super Smash Brothers Mansion! You already know the competitors. A tournament will be held later for your enjoyment."

"Yes, I do appreciate the hospitality Master Hand…" Iwata said as he surveyed the Smashers, making each one sweat, for they knew that he must be a mighty entity to make Master Hand act subservient. "…in fact, I am looking forward to seeing this tournament, and…" He paused as he came to NA. "Who are you?"

"We are Nonsense Advice…sir."

"What game are you from?"

"Nonsense Advice for the SNES, with Powersensor attachment."

"Very well, I see…Pikmin ATTACK!"

The Pikmin swarmed NA, keeping the other Smashers away. Javi managed to poke his head out of the throbbing mass of Pikmin.

"What the heck?"

"No Nintendo character knows anything about a game, therefore, you are not a nintendo game. Watch. Mario! Tell me what a Super Nintendo is."

Mario sweatdropped and started rambling along in incomprehensible italian.

"You see? Now tell me who sent you. Microsoft? Sony? Speak if you want to keep your innards intact, and there are no extra lives in this Mansion."

"No one sent us! We love Nintendo!"

"Silence! Do you not think this has been tried before! Countless have fallen. What do you think happened to Crash Bandicoot? Demon, you cannot have my soul!" Iwata whipped around to face Master Hand, who was torn between obeying his master, and helping who he knew to be innocent. "I trusted you Master Hand, with one of the greatest undertakings in history! How long have they been here?"

"About three days, sir."

"Three days! I should have you banished to the forgotten realms for this! No, calm down Iwata. How's this. I choose three fighters, and if Nonsense Advice can defeat them, they can stay and you keep your job."

"Very well." Master Hand felt confident that whoever Iwata chose from the Smashers would throw the fight to save SSBM.

"There is one condition though. Seeing as your fighters have grown attached to this Mansion, I shall choose the fighters. And I warn you Hand, I shall choose no lightweights."

Then, the lights went out, and Nonsense Advice began the fight.

Stage: Diamond City!

Nonsense Advice appeared at the top of a building, much like the Fourside stage, but during the day. Billboards abound, advertising pizza, music, and…garlic toothpaste?

Javi, where are we?

I think I know, and so do you. Diamonds, garlic…if Iwata chose the fighters, they're Nintendo characters right? And he mentioned them not being lightweights, sooo…

"Wario!" NA spun around to see none other than the prince of persuasion, the diamond which prefers to be rough, the dumber plumber, Wario!

"By the way Nonsense Advice, I forgot to mention. Considering your apparent luck in the way of items, Wario will get items, but not you."

"Bring it on!" Said Wario, a ray gun appearing in his hand. He blasted away, each round accentuated with a loud PEEEWW! NA managed to dodge half of the shots, but took a lot of damage when the became pinned against one of the billboards, held up by the sheer force of the lasers. When Wario ran out of ammo, he rushed in on his stubby little legs to get in one of his legendary Wario Smashes. Blanky managed to carry them upwards by ballooning up. Their heads were pounding so much it was easier to talk than to think-talk

"Guys, we can't take one of those smashes, we'll go flying!"

Javi dropped down with a gravity kick, knocking Wario to the ground. Before he could get out of the way, Javi nailed him with a down Smash attack, sending him skywards.

"He's too slow, keep on him!"

"We will just have to fix that."

A bunny hood appeared on Wario's head. "Right on!" Said Wario, as he rushed in with lightning speed, getting in three running hits, juggling NA in the air. Again, NA attempted a Gravity Kick, but he was too fast. "Heh heh, you cannot catch the Wario!" Wario chuckled as he ran, when Mutsy appeared next to him, matching him in speed.

"Multi-Mutsy!" The mutsies swarmed Wario, one of them ripping off the bunny hood. Wario fell to the ground, but not before knocking off the Mutsy swarm with a Wario Smash. Like Blanky predicted, the Smash was astounding, and the duplicates disappeared in puffs of smoke. Luckily, Mutsy, the original, was back with Javi. Wario jumped surprisingly fast, launching himself at NA, rear-end first.

"Wario Bounce!" And he did, bouncing to NA, not quite making it to them with the distance from the initial launch. Javi managed to grab him, bringing him close and headbutting him, then throwing him up, and nailing a Smash attack. As Wario began to fall, a Mega Mushroom appeared, making him easily three times his size. Javi was planning to smash him again, but his attack was rendered useless by a huge body slam. When Wario got up, a freezie appeared in his hand. He prepared to throw it, when Blanky shot out like a chameleon's tongue, grabbing the freezie,and whipping around to throw it back, it connected, freezing Wario in a block of ice. When he broke out, the Mega had worn off, and he was met with a completely charged Stitch Shot.

"WAWAWAWAWAAAH!"

Normally, their victory would have been met with a GAME, but all that happened was that everything became dark, sending them to the second part of Iwata's test.

Sorry about the delay, but you can see why this took so long to write. Ideas for the next opponent would be appreciated.