Chapter 3! So, (insert joke here)! Yeah, that's about all I have today, enjoy the chapter!
Warning: I don't own Harry Potter or FNAF! Although I thought that was obvious!
Text = Spells
"Text" = Speaking
'Text' = Thinking
{Text} = Parseltongue
Chapter 3: Music Calls!
'Who's idea was it to make young, fragile humans run through an illusion wall!' That's the chaotic thought that was stuck in Lolbit's mind currently, as he was staring at the pile of red heads from his compartment on the Hogwarts Express. 'Like, of course there is gonna be a pile up if no one can see where they are going! Come on, could they have not just put an illusion there that only wizards could see through!? And what about all the non-magical people on the other side!? Can't they just see families running into a wall and vanishing into fin air!? Does magic make you retarded!?' 'Papa, what does retarded mean?' Came the voice of Luna, looking at Lolbit with wide, adorable eyes. Lolbit just sighed, before turning to the confused cub. 'That is a naughty word! I feel like papa should get a swear jar at this point.' Lolbit deadpanned, getting a cute giggle in response.
Just then, they heard a loud knock on the compartment door, as Lolbit turned rapidly from the window, just as the door slid wide open. There, just outside in the corridor, stood a young, pale looking girl, one with blonde almost white, long hair and bright, striking ice blue eyes. Honestly, Lolbit thought she looked like an angel! "Hi, is it ok if I sit in here?" The girl asked politely, reviving a stuttered response of "S-sure!" from Lolbit in return, as she made her way into the compartment. It was then that he noticed the massive trunk dragging behind her, obviously too heavy to carry. 'Well, for normal people anyway!' Lolbit thought to himself smirking, as he got up out of his seat. "Here, let me help you with that!" He said, grabbing the huge trunk and proceeded to lift it like a paper weight, shoving it above on the storage racks. Turning back to the girl, Lolbit could barely contain a laugh, looking at her shocked face in amusement. "T-thanks." She said, obviously trying and failing to get over her shock. Lolbit just nodded, before sitting down on the bench, Luna sitting next to him and the girl sitting across from him. "So, my name is Daphne Greengrass. What's yours?" The girl, Daphne, asked making Lolbit blush for some unknown reason. 'What are you doing!? Pull yourself together man!' "T-that's a beautiful… I mean nice name! Not that it's not beautiful or anything! I—Sorry. My name is Hadrian or as I go by Lolbit. And as you can probably tell, I'm not very good with people." Lolbit said, receiving a cute giggle from both Daphne and Luna in response. "Yeah, that much was obvious! Anyway, do you have a last name or?" She continued, waiting for Lolbit or Harry 'better get used to that' to reply. "Oh, sorry. Names Hadrian Potter." He said, pretty much regretting it instantly! "Your Harry Potter! I expected you to be… taller, I guess?" Daphne stated, looking Harry up and down, only to hear a giggle come from the white fox in the corner. "Papa's a short ass!" Luna said, receiving gasps from both Harry and Daphne in return! "You can talk!? This entire time!?" Harry all but shouted, making Luna give a 'Oh crap!' look. "I mean, woof!" Luna barked out, only to receive a mock glare from Lolbit in return. "You're a fox! Foxes don't go woof!" Harry deadpanned, only to hear Daphne break down in pure laughter, Luna joining in seconds later.
"What?" Harry questioned, looking at them in confusion. "What does the fox say!?" Luna said, proceeding to roll on the floor in laughter, completely missing the annoyed face of Harry. 'I hate that damn song!' "So, Hadrian. Do you know what house you think you'll be going into?" Daphne asked, getting a shrug in return. "I'm not sure to be honest. Then again, I am lord Slytherin! So it would make sense for me to go into Slytherin house." Harry stated, only then noticing the flabbergasted face on Miss Greengrass! "You're lord Slytherin!?" She questioned, getting an affirmative nod in response. "Well, this year just go a lot more interesting!" She stated, getting a chuckle from Lolbit in return.
Just then, the compartment door flies open, making all the occupants jump in surprise, only to turn and see a average hight girl with bushy brown hair and chocolate brown eyes. She was dressed in her school dress robes, looking at Harry and Daphne. "Has anyone seen a toad? A boy named Neville's lost one." She questioned, getting a shrug from Harry and an annoyed look from Daphne. "Have you ever heard of knocking!? Also, no we have not seen a toad." Daphne stated, not looking to pleased with the girl. Harry was trying his hardest not to laugh, looking from Daphne to the girl, watching in entertainment. Huffing, the girl turned to Daphne, glaring. "You don't have to be so rude! I was only asking a question!" The girl said, before stopping her rant and turning to Harry and Luna. "Is that a fox!? You are not allowed foxes in Hogwarts, it said so on the letter! So if I was you, I would get rid of that, thing! Quick, before we get to school!" She all but demanded, as Luna shrunk back in fear! Both of them completely missing Harry's eyes go completely black! Pure white dots forming in the centre, giving him a frightening look! "I am going to say this only once. Dear insult Luna, or any of my friends again! And you will wish you were never born! Do I make myself clear!?" Harry stated angerly, his voice barely above a whisper, as the air started to glitching out around him! The girl jumped back in fear, before stomping her foot, before walking off down the corridor in annoyance. Daphne just watched the whole thing, an amused smile on her face. 'Yep, a very interesting year indeed!'
By the time they arrive at Hogsmeade station, the sky had gone completely dark, as the train blowed its whistle, pulling into the station. Disembarking, Harry, Daphne and Luna made their way onto the platform, Harry, and Daphne walking side by side, Luna sitting on Harry's shoulder. "Right, then! First years! This way, please! Come on, now, don't be shy! Come on now, hurry up!" they heard, turning around, only to see a towering man standing on the platform, a massive glowing lantern sitting in his hand. "Yep! He totally does not look like he is going to mug us!" Lolbit stated, as Daphne tried no to fall over in laughter!
As Harry and the rest of the first years walked with the huge man, he now learned was called Hagrid, Harry was wondering why none of the other students were following along with them. Then, it became very clear why! 'BOATS! THEY WANT ME IN A BOAT!' Harry screamed in his mind, making Luna look at him in concern. "No more 'n four to a boat!" Hagrid called, pointing to a fleet of little boats sitting in the water by the shore. Harry and Daphne were followed into their boat by Draco, the boy Harry met at the clothes store and another unknown girl named Tracey Davis. "Everyone in?" shouted Hagrid to the first years! The man was so big, he had a whole boat to himself! "Right then— FORWARD!"
And the fleet of little boats moved off all at once, gliding across the lake, which was as smooth as glass. Everyone was silent, well except for Lolbit that is, who was currently curled up in a ball, rocking backward and forwards. "Harry, you good?" questioned Daphne, looking at Harry in concern. "Yep! Great! Just peachy!" he stated back, looking at the ice-cold water in fright. Animatronics and water don't mix!
It was just then that everyone looked up in shock, staring up at a huge building, which just came into view overhead. Perched atop a high mountain on the other side, its windows sparkling in the starry sky, was a vast castle with many turrets and towers. It towered over them as they sailed nearer and nearer to the cliff on which it stood. "Heads down!" yelled Hagrid as the first boat reached the cliff; they all bent their heads and the little boats carried them through a curtain of ivy which hid a wide opening in the cliff face. They were carried along a dark tunnel, which seemed to be taking them right underneath the castle, until they reached a kind of underground harbour, where they clambered out on to the rocks and pebbles.
It was then that a huge toad jumped past, making some of the first years jump back in fright! "Oy, you there! Is this your toad?" said Hagrid, who was checking his boats as people climbed out of them.
"Trevor!" cried a boy, who Harry guessed was Neville, blissfully holding out his hands. Then they clambered up a passageway in the rock after Hagrid's lamp, coming out at last on to smooth, damp grass right in the shadow of the castle. They walked up a flight of stone steps and crowded around the huge, oak front door as Hagrid raised a gigantic fist, knocking on the door three times.
The door swung open at once. A tall, black-haired witch in emerald-green robes stood there. She had a very stern face and Harry's first thought was that this was not someone to cross. "The firs' years, Professor McGonagall," said Hagrid, nodding to the strict looking woman. "Thank you, Hagrid. I will take them from here." She pulled the door wide. The entrance hall was so big you could have fit the whole of the Pizzeria in it, well Harry thought you could anyway. The stone walls were lit with flaming torches, the ceiling was too high to make out, and a magnificent marble staircase facing them led to the upper floors.
They followed Professor McGonagall across the flagged stone floor. Harry and Daphne could hear the drone of hundreds of voices from a doorway to the right — the rest of the school must already be here — but Professor McGonagall showed the first years into a small, empty chamber off the hall. They crowded in, standing rather closer together than they would usually have done, peering about nervously. 'This would be a covid nightmare.' Lolbit joked, looking at the reader. "Welcome to Hogwarts," said Professor McGonagall, starting off her grand speech. "The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory, and spend free time in your house common room. The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history, and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rule breaking will lose house points. At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honour. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours. The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting."
Her eyes lingered for a moment on Neville's cloak, which was fastened under his left ear, and on a red headed boy's smudged nose. Harry nervously tried to flatten his orange and white hair, only to realise he was not getting anywhere. "I shall return when we are ready for you," said Professor McGonagall. "Please wait quietly." She said, as she left the chamber. Harry swallowed nervously, looking around at all the other students.
"How exactly do they sort us into houses?" asked the same red head, looking worried. "Fred said it hurts a lot, but I think he was joking."
Then something unexpected happened that made him jump about a foot in the air — several people behind him screamed! "What the —?" Harry asked, only to gasp in surprise. About twenty ghosts had just streamed through the back wall. Pearly-white and slightly transparent, they glided across the room talking to one another and hardly glancing at the first years. They seemed to be arguing. What looked like a fat little monk was saying: "Forgive and forget, I say, we ought to give him a second chance —" "My dear Friar, haven't we given Peeves all the chances he deserves? He gives us all a bad name and you know, he's not really even a ghost — I say, what are you all doing here?" A ghost wearing a ruff and tights said, suddenly noticing the first years. "New students!" said a ghost named Fat Friar, smiling around at them. "About to be Sorted, I suppose?" A few people nodded mutely, not entirely sure what to say. Harry just smiled at them, not expecting to see other dead people here! "Well then! Hope to see you in Hufflepuff!" said the Friar. "My old house, you know."
"So, it's true then, what they're saying on the train. Harry Potter has come to Hogwarts!" A student said, looking at Harry in surprise. Some of the students start to whisper, "Harry Potter?" as Draco walks over, introduces his two friends. "This is Crabbe and Goyle. And of course, you know me already, Draco Malfoy!" Just then, the red head sniggers, grabbing Draco's attention. "Think my name's funny, do you? No need to ask yours. Red hair, and a hand-me-down robe? You must be a Weasley. Well, soon find that some wizarding families are better than others, Potter. Don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort. I can help you there." Draco said, offering his hand out to Harry.
'So, I can either except this jackass's friendship and get so quality entertainment out of it! Or, I can refuse and probably cause more problems than its worth? Yeah, I think this is pretty straight forward!' Harry thought to himself, getting a nod in agreement from Luna. "Ok Malfoy. I would happily be friends." Harry stated, shaking the boy's hand, a mischievous grin plastered on his face the entire time. This did not go unnoticed by Daphne! 'Son of a Bitch! He is using him for his own entertainment! I am gonna enjoy this!' she thought, giving a smirk of her own to Harry.
"Move along now," said a sharp voice, talking to the ghosts. "The Sorting Ceremony's about to start." Professor McGonagall had returned. One by one, the ghosts floated away through the opposite wall. "Now, form a line," Professor McGonagall told the first years, "and follow me."
Feeling oddly as though his legs had turned to lead, Harry got into line behind a boy with sandy hair, with Weasley behind him, as they walked out of the chamber, back across the hall, and through a pair of double doors into the Great Hall.
Harry had never even imagined such a strange and splendid place. It was lit by thousands and thousands of candles that were floating in mid-air over four long tables, where the rest of the students were sitting. These tables were laid with glittering golden plates and goblets. At the top of the hall was another long table where the teachers were sitting. Professor McGonagall led the first years up here, so that they came to a halt in a line facing the other students, with the teachers behind them. The hundreds of faces staring at them looked like pale lanterns in the flickering candlelight. Dotted here and there among the students, the ghosts shone misty silver. Mainly to avoid all the staring eyes, Harry looked upward and saw a velvety black ceiling dotted with stars. He heard the brown-haired girl from before whisper, "Its bewitched to look like the sky outside. I read about it in Hogwarts, A History." Causing Harry to just roll his eyes in annoyance, Luna agreeing with him in his mind.
Harry quickly looked down again as Professor McGonagall silently placed a three-legged stool in front of the first years. On top of the stool she put a pointed wizard's hat. This hat was patched and frayed and extremely dirty. 'Maybe we had to try and get a rabbit out of it', Harry thought jokingly. Noticing that everyone in the hall was now staring at the hat, he stared at it, too. For a few seconds, there was complete silence. Then the hat twitched. A rip near the brim opened wide like a mouth — and the hat began to sing:
"Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,
But don't judge on what you see,
I'll eat myself if you can find
A smarter hat than me.
You can keep your bowlers black,
Your top hats sleek and tall,
For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat
And I can cap them all.
There's nothing hidden in your head
The Sorting Hat can't see,
So try me on and I will tell you
Where you ought to be.
You might belong in Gryffindor,
Where dwell the brave at heart,
Their daring, nerve, and chivalry
Set Gryffindors apart;
You might belong in Hufflepuff,
Where they are just and loyal,
Those patient Hufflepuffs are true
And unafraid of toil;
Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,
if you've a ready mind,
Where those of wit and learning,
Will always find their kind;
Or perhaps in Slytherin
You'll make your real friends,
Those cunning folk use any means
To achieve their ends.
So put me on! Don't be afraid!
And don't get in a flap!
You're in safe hands
though I have none
For I'm a Thinking Cap!"
'What. The. Fuck!' Was the only thought that was going through Lolbit's mind, as he stared at the hat in complete shock! The whole hall burst into applause as the hat finished its song. It bowed to each of the four tables and then became quite still again. Professor McGonagall now stepped forward, holding a long roll of parchment. "When I call your name, you will put on the hat and sit on the stool to be sorted," she said.
"Abbott, Hannah!" A pink-faced girl with blonde pigtails stumbled out of line, put on the hat, which fell right down over her eyes, and sat down. A moments pause — "HUFFLEPUFF!" shouted the hat. The table on the right cheered and clapped as Hannah went to sit down at the Hufflepuff table. Harry saw the ghost of the Fat Friar waving merrily at her.
"Bones, Susan!" "HUFFLEPUFF!" shouted the hat again, and Susan scuttled off to sit next to Hannah.
This went on for another five minutes, with Draco and Daphne going to Slytherin, while Weasley and the brown-haired girl, Granger, when to Gryffindor. Just as Lolbit was starting to get bored, he suddenly heard his name be called out! "Potter, Harry!" As Harry stepped forward, whispers suddenly broke out like little hissing fires all over the hall.
"Potter, did she say?"
"The Harry Potter?"
The last thing Harry saw before the hat dropped over his eyes was the hall full of people craning to get a good look at him. Next second he was looking at the black inside of the hat. He waited. "Hmm," said a small voice in his ear. "Difficult. Very difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind either. There's talent, oh my goodness, — your dead! Now that's interesting… So where shall I put you?" Harry gripped the edges of the stool and thought, 'Slytherin!' In his mind, making the hat jump a little. "Slytherin, eh?" said the small voice. "Are you sure? You could be great, you know, it's all here in your head, and Slytherin will help you on the way to greatness, no doubt about that — hum, yes, well if your sure – better be SLITHERIN!" The hat shouted out, causing all the students and staff in the hall to stare in shock! Slowly, the Slytherin table started to clap, eventually turning into full blow cheers! Harry got up confidently, walking off towards the table, Luna trotting by his side with a huge smile on her face!
"Way to go Harry." Daphne said, inviting him to sit down next to her. A seat which he gladly excepted! Turning to the front, he could see the High Table properly now. At the end furthest from him sat Hagrid, who caught his eye and gave him a concerned look. Harry was unsure of what to say to that. And there, in the centre of the High Table, in a large gold chair, sat Albus Dumbledore. Harry recognized him at once from the card he'd gotten out of the Chocolate Frog on the train. Dumbledore's silver hair was the only thing in the whole hall that shone as brightly as the ghosts. Harry then noticed one of the teachers, a black, greasy haired man looking at him in shock, clearly not believing he had gone into Slytherin! Harry just shrugged, before turning back to the front.
Albus Dumbledore had gotten to his feet. He was beaming at the students, his arms opened wide, as if nothing could have pleased him more than to see them all there. 'Pedo!' Harry said in his mind, laughing at his own joke. Luna just rolled her eyes at him.
"Welcome," he said. "Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak! Thank you!" He sat back down. Everybody clapped and cheered. Harry didn't know whether to laugh or not!
As everyone was enjoying their food, of course Harry did not really need to eat so he was fine. Harry looked up at the High Table again. Hagrid was drinking deeply from his goblet. Professor McGonagall was talking to Professor Dumbledore. Professor Quirrell, in his absurd turban, was talking to the teacher with greasy black hair, a hooked nose, and sallow skin, who turned and looked directly at him! "Who's that teacher talking to Professor Quirrell?" Lolbit asked, looking at his house mates, waiting for a reply. "Oh, that's Professor Snape. He teaches Potions, but he doesn't want to — everyone knows he's after Quirrell's job. Knows an awful lot about the Dark Arts, Snape. He is also my Godfather, so I know him very well. He is also our head of house." Draco stated, looking rather pleased with himself.
Harry watched Snape for a while, but Snape didn't look at him again. At last, the food disappeared, and Professor Dumbledore got to his feet again. The hall fell silent. "Ahem — just a few more words now that we are all fed and watered. I have a few start-of-term notices to give you. First years should note that the forest on the grounds is forbidden to all pupils. And a few of our older students would do well to remember that as well." Dumbledore's twinkling eyes flashed in the direction of the Weasley twins. "I have also been asked by Mr. Filch, the caretaker, to remind you all that no magic should be used between classes in the corridors. Quidditch trials will be held in the second week of the term. Anyone interested in playing for their house teams should contact Madam Hooch. And finally, I must tell you that this year, the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a very painful death." Many looked concerned at that statement, while Harry had a look of excitement on his face! 'Adventure!' He thought to himself, before Dumbledore began to speak again. "And now, before we go to bed, let us sing the school song!" cried Dumbledore. Harry noticed that the other teachers' smiles had become rather fixed.
Dumbledore gave his wand a little flick, as if he was trying to get a fly off the end, and a long golden ribbon flew out of it, which rose high above the tables and twisted itself, snakelike, into words.
"Everyone pick their favourite tune," said Dumbledore, "and off we go!"
And the school bellowed:
"Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,
Teach us something please,
Whether we be old and bald
Or young with scabby knees,
Our heads could do with filling
With some interesting stuff,
For now they're bare and full of air,
Dead flies and bits of fluff,
So teach us things worth knowing,
Bring back what we've forgot,
just do your best, we'll do the rest,
And learn until our brains all rot."
Everybody finished the song at different times. At last, only the Weasley twins were left singing along to a very slow funeral march. Dumbledore conducted their last few lines with his wand and when they had finished, he was one of those who clapped loudest. "Ah, music," he said, wiping his eyes.
Harry did not know whether to tear his ears out or cry in a corner! That was horrible! They call that music! 'No, this wont do!' He thought to himself, standing up from the table, catching everyone's attention! "You call that music!" Harry shouted, causing Dumbledore to look at him in confusion.
Suddenly, an orange and purple microphone appeared in Lolbit's hand, as his robes changed into an orange and white suit, a purple bowtie hanging around its collar. "This, is music!" Harry shouted, as just then, music started to play from out of nowhere! (Phantom by NateWantsToBattle. Why, because I like the song!) Harry stated to dance around the room, before his eyes turned black with white dots! Then, he began to sing!
"I'm just a phantom in your room
With no intent on leaving soon
And you're still not even sure just how I got here!
Another ghost that's in your bed
That you wish you could leave for dead
Ain't no magic word can make me disappear!"
Lolbit sang, winking at Daphne, who just shook her head in embarrassment, while Luna did the same.
"Now that room, it starts to dim
Set the mood for onset sin
And now we're passed out on the floor of your apartment!
With every single warning sign
It passed you up and slipped you by
But we're all bound to end up back to where we started!
Make no mistake
I'll break you down!
(Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh)
Shout it around town!
Lolbit then jumped up on the Slytherin table, beginning do dance down the length of the thing!
"I'm not what you want
But I'm exactly what you need
Take a bite and feed
Your satisfaction guaranteed!
Harry sang, pointing at the head table, grinning at them in the process!
"I'm your sunshine, whoa
I'm gonna burn down your parade
I'm a shooting star
That wish you wished you never made!"
Jumping down of the table, Lolbit went into the second verse!
"Don't wanna take a leap of faith
You wanna do this face to face
And like an animal the instincts taken over!
There ain't nothing to debate
Blow this purgatory state
The city lights will drown you out in the exposure!
Now that room, it starts to dim
Set the mood for onset sin
And now we're passed out on the floor of your apartment!
With every single warning sign
It passed you up and slipped you by
But we're all bound to end up back to where we started!
Make no mistake
I'll break you down
(Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh)
Shout it around town!"
Just then, all the Muggleborn and Half-Blood students started to cheer, clearly enjoying the show! Hell, even Dumbledore could not keep a smile off his face!
"I'm not what you want
But I'm exactly what you need
Take a bite and feed
Your satisfaction guaranteed!
I'm your sunshine, whoa
I'm gonna burn down your parade
I'm a shooting star
That wish you wished you never made!"
As the song started to go to its final verse, the strangest thing happened! Shadowy figures started to appear around the hall, all cheering for Lolbit! Even some of the Pure-Blooded students joined in, enjoying the show!
"This world is what you need
Where the monsters roam and the demons all feed!
Relax don't you look so wary
It's all only temporary!
We roam and sing along
While the choir joins in sing an abhorrent song!
We bite, it's a little bit scary
The pain's only temporary!
Ah hahahahahahaha!"
Lolbit laughed, glitching firework illusions into the background! No-one had a clue what was happening anymore, but not many seemed to care!
"I'm not what you want
But I'm exactly what you need.
Take a bite and feed
Your satisfaction guaranteed.
I'm not what you want
But I'm exactly what you need!
Take a bite and feed
Your satisfaction guaranteed!
I'm your sunshine, whoa
I'm gonna burn down your parade!
I'm a shooting star
That wish you wished you never made!
Wish you wish you never madeeeeee!"
As Lolbit finished, everyone, well except the teachers, started to cheer, still completely unsure of what just happened! "And that Dumbledore! Is how you sing!" Harry stated out of breath, as he went and sat back down at the Slytherin table. "Thank you Mr Potter! Anyway bedtime. Off you trot!" Dumbledore stated, as everyone got up from their tables, most of them trying to instantly crowding around Harry, Daphne, and Luna, who just managed to slip out the hall unnoticed! "What have you brought upon us Hadrian Potter!" Daphne stated, repeatedly slapping a laughing Harry on the arm! "Fun!" Was all he said, as they follow the rest of the Slytherins to their dorms.