Disclaimer: See chapter 1

Authors note: A little wordy but a bit of fun before we dive into blood and mayhem. I'm diverging from the entire canon with Sera's rifle – and I am aware that how I'm portraying it, isn't possible in real life. But if this was real life then I'd be taller, with a lot more free time.

Chapter 20

In the machine shop, Jane was busy buffing out the last of the burrs on the muzzle brake for Seras' cannon. Her hearing aid was stuffed in a pocket and large mufflers covered her ears – she didn't hear much but she wasn't about to risk the little she had left.

Giving the gleaming cylinder a final once over, she noticed that there was a marked absence of people in the room, where it had been bustling only a few minutes before. Taking her hands away from the spinning machine, she tilted her head back and cast an eye over her shoulder, and a flash of red caught her peripheral vision.

"You're scaring the staff." She said blandly.

Finished with the machine, she pulled off the ear protectors and turned to look at Alucard and then grinned unexpectedly. It was warm and friendly, with a tiny gleam of malice.

"You'll have to teach me how to do that for when they're running behind schedule."

Alucard was a little taken aback by the grin – most humans didn't smile when he pitched up. Even his master had only graced him with a few precious smiles. In fact the only one that ever seemed really happy to see him was Seras. Before he could answer, he found his hands full with a box of steel mechanisms, tubes of buffing compound and tools. Jane strode past him, tossing over her shoulder:

"Make yourself useful, and come along – there's something that I need you to squeeze for me."

An ebony eyebrow lifted right past his glasses frame, while he dutifully followed after her, wondering at the casual attitude he was receiving. He wasn't sure if he liked it or not – perhaps he'd have to shake her confidence a little. Then he looked at her hands and relaxed, they were trembling.

Jane carried on down the corridor clutching the muzzle brake, hoping that her shaking wasn't obvious. She wasn't afraid, but somehow just the presence of him was enough to disturb her equilibrium. She fumbled her aid out of her pocket and shoved it where it belonged, becoming aware of the heavy footsteps, following in her wake.

Silence remained between them as they reached her vault-like workshop. Alucard's attention was drawn to a worktable that held a massive rifle standing on a bi-pod. Jane was already at the barrel, affixing the final piece. He hefted the box in his hands, causing it to jingle and clink.

"Oh, shove it on the bench there. I'll be done here in a second." She pointed with her chin in a vague direction and turned her full attention back to the rifle.

Dumping the box unceremoniously on the back workbench, he watched as she finished off the fitting, tested the bolt mechanism and pulled the trigger in a dry fire. He was amused to see that while she was handling the weapon, her hands were completely steady.

"There." She said with a great deal of satisfaction, as she stood back and considered her work. He had to admit – it was impressive. At just over two meters long, it was going to be taller than his police girl. He grinned to think of her reaction to it.

"Didn't Seras come with you?" she asked, coming over to him and swiping up a cloth. Wiping her hands clean, she peered around his large shoulders, looking for his bubbly blonde shadow.

"She doesn't travel direct - yet." He smirked. "But I can call her here if you'd like."

"I'd like."

Alucard mentally reached out to his fledgling and called her to him, letting her know where he was. He felt her twinge of annoyance at being disturbed while having dinner and let her know that she could take her time. After all, he had plenty to amuse himself with right in front of him.

Jane unpacked the box that he'd carted in, putting things where they belonged and generally tidying up the already orderly bench. She studiously avoided looking at him, because she knew that she wouldn't be able to look at IT again – not without saying something rude. And she was stuck here with him, and IT for the hour that it would take Seras to get there. Then she wondered why she was trying to be polite, it was her workshop after all.

* It's not doing anything to you. * She mentally chided herself.

* But it's bloody horrible.*

* And an inanimate object.*

"It's still annoying.*

"She's on her way."

The resonant voice jerked her out of her inner argument and she looked up from the spotless surface that she'd been polishing and found he'd moved to stand right next to her.

"Now," he added with a suggestive tone. "You mentioned that you had something you needed me to squeeze?"

She turned the same colour as her hair and groaned.

"I didn't think that one through did I?"

Before any reply could be delivered, she stepped over to the main table and took a seat on one of the tall stools that were there.

"Come sit here."

She indicated another stool, on the other side of the table. She was determined to pretend that her previous comment had never been uttered. She ferreted around in the underneath storage area while he came and sat down.

Placing a pair of gun grips on the table, she looked up at him and naturally, said the first thing that came into her head.

"Take it off; I can't stand to look at it one more time."

He stared at her as if she'd lost her mind and then realised that she was pointing at his head. All of his perfect fangs went on display as he understood what she meant. He sat up taller and looked down his nose at her.

"You don't like my hat?"

"No!"

"It's just a hat." He said, echoing her own argument back to her.

"It's ridiculous, and every time I see it – I want to hang it up and use it for target practice."

He tilted his head down and peered at her from under the brim and over his glasses.

"And if I said no?"

Jane ground her teeth together and wondered if wishing hard enough would make the ground open, giving her a convenient hole to bury herself in, or shove Alucard into. Little did she know that Integra had often had often wished for the same thing.

"Then I will use it for target practice – while you're still wearing it!"

"You seemed happy enough to see me when I arrived." He huffed, reaching up for the offending headwear.

"I am happy to see you, but with that thing on, I can't actually see you." She shot back without thinking.

His grin turned feral and she knew that he'd won this round, despite him capitulating and removing his hat. It shimmered out of sight and for good measure he took off his glasses and stowed them away inside his coat. He looked across the table with challenge in his eyes.

"I was right about you." He said plainly. "You are going to be fun."

She narrowed her eyes and wondered when he had made that assessment and then said:

"Moving right along, I want you to take a look at the two options I have for grips."

Inwardly praying that he'd drop the previous line of conversation, she picked up the first one and held it out to him.

"This one is partly steel but mostly carbon fibre with solid packing between the outer and inner walls. It's lighter but I have a suspicion that it won't do the job."

Smirking, he took it from her and hefted it in his hand, then curled his fingers and tightened his hold. It took a bit more strength than he'd thought but before long, he crushed it. He offered the mangled metal back to her.

"No, it won't."

"Bugger."

She dropped it into the bin next to her and held out the second one.

"This one is steel and has titanium pins between the walls. It's stronger but it's heavy and wide. It'll dictate the entire size of the barrel. "

Getting a good grip, he could feel the weight that she was concerned about. It was inconsequential to him, but he did like the way the top flare fitted perfectly into the web between his thumb and trigger finger. Applying strength, he tested its integrity.

She watched him heft the grip and admired the way it fit elegantly into his hand. She was secretly glad the carbon fibre hadn't worked out. Something deep inside her rebelled at using anything but solid metal in a firearm.

He held it out to her.

"I could crush it – but it'll do the job it's needed for."

"Good." She unconsciously graced him with a brilliant smile. "I'll get the specs to production and we can start cutting in the morning."

"I'm surprised that Seras' weapon is done sooner than mine." He grumbled as she started making notes for the cutting crew.

"Hers was just a re-purpose really." She replied absently. "The only tricky thing was a dual firing option. Yours is much more complicated."

"Oh?"

"You don't seem to realise that this weapon will be completely fitted to you. From weight, form, firing and recoil mechanism – all of it has been calculated to make that weapon an extension of your hand."

She carried on scribbling, not noticing the thoughtful expression that crossed his features. He was trying to think back to the last thing that had been made expressly for him and him alone. All he could come up with was his straight jacket and his cell. Even the Joshua had been modified from a standard stock design, being limited by the era's available technology.

He watched her scribbling for a few more minutes, noting the dark shadows under her eyes, and recalled her comment that they would 'start cutting in the morning'. Surely she didn't mean to stay up all night and tomorrow too?

"Burning the candle at both ends are we?" he asked with the sardonic tone that he knew irritated her.

Eyeing him sharply, Jane guessed he was referring to the obvious signs of sleep deprivation, and it irked her that he'd noticed.

"It's none of your concern." She replied curtly.

"But what if you're too tired to assemble my gun?" he teased, wondering how far he could push this without incurring gunfire. He hadn't forgotten Integra's advice on shooting him.

She put down her pen, looked up and gave him a definitive middle finger.

"Should I send Walter with some soup?"

His referral to her less than stellar introduction to Hellsing's leader clued her in to the fact that he knew she'd been slipped a Mickey Finn along with her soup. Losing the last shred of her already tenuous grip on her temper, she drew her sidearm and levelled it at the gloating vampire. One in the chest wouldn't kill him.

And that's how Seras found them as she trotted through the workshop door.

"Master...oh?"