First Time at a Second Chance

by The Great Weiss Shark

Working at a café had many perks like free food and coffee, and Ruby honestly loved her job, but it felt lacking. There were days she wanted to give up and stay in bed but something in her gut told her to get up and go. And so she did and now she knows why: a chance meeting with a beautiful stranger and her little patch of spring. GP!Ruby

19. What More Can I Do? Part I

Chapter Nineteen: What More Can I Do? Part I

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Ruby rushed to the convenience store as fast as her legs could carry her, braving the frigid snow, ice, and wind just so she could finally, finally get laid. All of her of her friends talked nonstop about how awesome sex was and how good it felt, it was almost like an exclusive club that Ruby only got to be a part of because they invaded her lunch table. But now she can join in and be one of the "cool kids" because she was going to lose her v-card to the sexiest woman alive. Ruby couldn't wait! This was officially going to be the best Christmas ever.

Pushing the door open, Ruby kicked the excess snow off her shoes before walking in and waving at the cashier who didn't notice her. She brushed the terrible customer service aside and began her quest.

The convenience store didn't have the best selection compared to the supermarket which had a small aisle dedicated to them. Ruby could pick between flavoured, ribbed, glow in the dark, and so much more there. The convenience store on the other hand only had lubed with words that greatly exaggerated the sizes like "King Size" and "Monster." Ruby was half tempted to buy the one that said "Bazooka" for laughs, but the price tag wasn't so funny.

Though on a more serious thought, the names absolutely baffled Ruby to no end. How was anyone supposed to accurately know what size they should buy based on these ridiculous descriptions? Moreover, Ruby actually felt bad for the companies making these things because there must've been something that drove them to this absurdity. Then again, Ruby could easily list ten people off the top of her head—Jaune—who would probably throw a fit if someone handed them a "regular" size condom. Thankfully, Ruby's ego wasn't as fragile. Weiss had set her straight when Ruby asked what size to get a few weeks prior.

Now that she had her box of condoms in hand, Ruby felt a little silly just dropping it in front of the cashier with nothing else. Thinking fast on her feet, Ruby counted what little pocket change she had left and perused the aisles. She found a chocolate bar she knew Weiss liked below her own personal favourite. It was a little pricy, but the woman of her dreams was worth it. And on the way to the counter, Ruby spotted a bag of Weiss' favourite peach hard candies and grabbed those too. No one was going to accuse Ruby Rose of being a bad girlfriend, not even Ruby Rose herself.

"Welcome, did you find everything you need?" asked the cashier in a tired, bored tone that said he asked this question a lot.

"Uh," Ruby subtly tucked her condoms further under Weiss' birthday presents to hide them from the little old lady behind her, "yeah."

"These hard candies are two for—"

"Nope! This is everything," Ruby cut in impatiently. "I-I got everything I need so can you ring me up, please?"

The cashier frowned, his beady black eyes narrowing. He slowly pick up the chocolate bar, scanned it, then carelessly dropped it into a bag he threw onto the counter.

"I was just trying to make small talk," he said angrily. "It's Christmas yet I'm stuck here."

"Look, dude, I'm sorry you gotta work on Christmas, but I'm seriously strapped for time," Ruby said, crossing her arms.

"If you've got time to go shopping, then you've got time to chat," he argued. "My name's—"

Ruby rolled her eyes for what felt like the umpteenth time this conversation and said, "I really don't care, man."

"Would you just—" The cashier angrily grabbed the hard candies and found the box hidden beneath it. His face went from irritated to smug in a matter of seconds. "Oh, I see," he said, slowly scanning the candies so the condoms were in view for as long as possible. "Now I get why you're in a rush. Hell, I'd be in a rush too."

"I bet you would," Ruby muttered under her breath as she clenched her hands, gritted her teeth. She took a deep, long breath to calm herself down and it almost worked, but then the cashier decided to open his stupid mouth again.

"Someone's tryin' to get lucky on Christmas," he laughed, waving the box tauntingly in front of Ruby's face. She recoiled away from his immaturity, but he seemed to take it in stride and continued to talk. "So why are you out here? Boyfriend too lazy to get 'em himself?"

Feeling her face grow red with both anger and embarrassment, Ruby opened her mouth to argue, but the little old lady beat her to it.

"If that's your idea of flirting, then I feel sorry for any woman stupid enough to fall for it," she said without hesitation. "Listen here, whippersnapper, picking on a girl won't make her like you."

"What?" the cashier barked in surprise.

"Are you deaf, boy?" the old lady asked with one eyebrow quirked. "Because I think I made myself perfectly clear."

"Why don't you mind your own—"

"I'm going to stop you right there," she said, stamping her cane down hard. "You're on the clock and this young lady and I are your costumers. Where's your respect? Our business is what nets you a paycheque." The cashier scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Did you just roll your eyes at me, boy?"

"What?"

"I can hear those beady little eyes rolling inside that empty head of yours."

"Why you little—"

"Whoa! Whoa, okay," Ruby said, speaking up now that the shock had worn off, "let's all calm down here."

"I am calm, girlie," the old lady laughed, stamping her cane down again. "I just want my lotto tickets, but this boy is taking forever. I'm gunna die before he gets to me at this rate."

"Uh…" Ruby blinked, not knowing what else to say; the lady looked pretty old.

"Boy, bag her things."

"Fine, whatever," he grumbled. He quickly scanned the last of Ruby's items and told her the total in an angry tone.

"Add one Lotto Grand and two Miner's scratch tickets."

"Huh?" Ruby blinked. "I—"

"Take your bag and go, girlie," the old lady said. "Call it a Christmas gift from a lonely ol' hag who ain't gettin' any."

"No, I can't do that!" Ruby said, shaking her head.

"Are you shaking your head?"

"Er, yeah?"

The old lady sighed in annoyance. "Take your things and go, I'm starting to lose my patience and what little hair I have left."

"But—"

"No buts!" The old lady smacked Ruby's butt with her cane then poked her with it after. "Get going, girlie."

Ruby hesitantly took her things and double-checked that everything was inside. Chocolate, candy, expensive black box filled with unmentionables. Check, check, and check.

"Thanks," Ruby said with a grateful smile, "uh…?"

"Maria," the old lady said, smacking Ruby's butt again. "Oh, that had some bounce!"

"M-Maria," Ruby stammered out with a heavy blush, "I, uh, thanks."

Maria waved her off and Ruby hightailed it out of the store, ploughing through the snow covered streets like a champ until she stumbled back into Weiss' apartment complex. Ruby greeted Gertrude again and nabbed another cookie when she offered the plate.

"Your cookies are the best, Gerty," Ruby moaned as she bit into the soft, chewy treat.

"Thank you, dearie," Gertrude chuckled. "But you should try my sandwiches next. I've been told they're to die for."

"I'd die for these cookies on the spot if you asked me to," Ruby laughed. "Seriously, thanks."

"You flatterer!" Gertrude blushed.

"Alright, gotta head back up to the Missus before she thinks I've run off with you," Ruby said. "Happy holidays, Gerty."

"Happy holidays to you too, Ruby," Gertrude replied.

After waving goodbye to Gertrude, Ruby got into the elevator and pushed the top button. A few minutes passed and the elevator came to a gentle stop with a pleasant little ding.

"This is it," Ruby whispered as she stepped through the doors.

The hallway leading to Weiss' door felt like a mile long trek despite being only a few steps. Ruby was sweating profusely beneath her collar and her face felt warm. Fear of the unknown strangled Ruby's heart with an iron grip, but she bravely pushed on and made it to the foot of Weiss' door. She took a deep, steadying breath before rapidly knocking on it twice. She was about to knock a third time when Weiss shouted "one minute" loud enough for Ruby to hear.

"Waiting!" Ruby shouted back with an uneasy smile. Her pulse was rapidly escalating and her hands felt so antsy. She needed to do something—anything—so she quickly pulled the chocolate and the candies out of the bag to surprise Weiss with them, but it was Ruby that got the surprise of a lifetime.

Fresh from the shower and still quite wet, Weiss answered the door dressed in nothing but a plush black bathrobe with her initials embroidered on the left breast in gold. A thick towel that matched her robe in both colour and quality was draped across her shoulders to catch the excess water in her hair that was done up in a loose ponytail. She greeted Ruby warmly with a smile, but it began to falter with uncertainty when Ruby just stood there like a statue.

"Ruby, darling, are you okay?"

But Ruby didn't respond. Instead, her jaw dropped open like a hatch as her hands went slack and dropped everything she'd rushed to buy. She was so awestruck by the goddess before her that she didn't snap out of it until Weiss sharply called her name.

"Ruby!" Weiss shouted as she bent down and picked up the mess. "What is all this?" she asked, glancing up with mild irritation written on her face.

"I-I," Ruby gulped, her mind instantly going back to when Weiss was on her knees between Ruby's legs giving her the exact same look. "Golly, you're pretty—I-I mean, I got you a few presents!" she yelped with a furious blush spreading across her face like a brush fire. "Happy birthday, baby!"

Weiss quirked an eyebrow and mouthed the world "golly" with a silent incredulous laugh that gently shook her shoulders. Ruby felt like dying right then and there. She was glad—no, ecstatic—that she could make Weiss laugh, but who in the hell says "golly" in this day and age?!

Thinking fast, Ruby slapped on her brightest smile and said "I hope you like them!" as quickly and as smoothly as she could to shuffle the topic along.

Snorting, Weiss got up and carefully examined the treats in her hands with a soft smile and a tender gaze. "Merci, Ruby," she said as she turned the chocolate bar over to read the label. "I love these."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, no problem!" Ruby beamed with a cheeky wink, shooting Weiss some ever classy finger guns. Weiss looked at her like she'd grown a second head. "Not your thing?"

Weiss shook her head.

"Damn it," Ruby pouted with a defeated sigh.

"You're acting strange," Weiss pointed out without remorse.

Ruby scoffed at her and proudly puffed out her chest. "Nah, I'm my usual self! Yup. Usual self."

But Weiss still wasn't convinced, and Ruby was quickly running out of Yang-y things to do in awkward situations. She tried the smile again, but no dice. At this point, all Ruby could do was pout and pray.

"Golly, why are you suddenly so nervous?" Weiss teased when Ruby's bottom lip quivered.

"'Nervous'?" Ruby repeated with a nervous laugh. "Who's Nervous? I'm not Nervous, I'm Ruby."

Rolling her eyes, Weiss huffed and said, "Alright, smartass, you know exactly what I meant."

"Okay, maybe I'm a little nervous," Ruby confessed demurely, pout still in full effect.

"Why?" Weiss asked, not at all affected by Ruby's patented puppy dog pout; one of the few drawbacks to dating a woman with a young child.

"Because look at you!" Ruby suddenly exclaimed, gesturing to Weiss and her pure perfection in complete adoration. "You're perfect! I love everything I'm seeing right now!"

"I'm not perfect," Weiss said, frowning.

"Oh, I beg to differ, Mrs. Perfect," Ruby blissfully sighed. "I don't think I'll ever get used to seeing you."

"Er, you're going to have to get used to looking at me eventually, you know?" Weiss teased with her perfect brows furrowed together perfectly.

Ruby shrugged and said, "Yeah, I know, but that day is not today or anytime in the near or disyant future!"

"You are so silly," Weiss laughed as she leaned up and kissed Ruby. "Now get in here, you dolt. I missed you."

Ruby quickly wiped her shoes on the doormat before following Weiss inside and closing the door behind them. She handed Weiss the bag and bent down to undo her shoes.

The sound of plastic rustling and a curious hum followed by a laugh drew Ruby's curiosity. She looked up but immediately regretted it because Weiss had pulled out the little black box. She looked like a cat that caught the mouse with her playful smirk gleeful eyes.

"Is this another birthday present?" she asked with a sexy half-lidded stare as she coyly tapped the box against her cheek.

"Er, I guess?" Ruby answered hesitantly.

Weiss hummed in thought as she dropped the box back into the bag along with her candy and set it aside on the dining table. Ruby breathed a sigh of relief and went back to untying her shoes.

"Sorry for making you wait," she said when she came back. She was patting her towel against her hair, fluffing and ruffling it to shake as much of the moisture out as she could.

"It's… whoa…" Ruby hadn't noticed it before, but now that things had slowed down and they were under some better light, it was all she could see. "You have freckles," she blurted out in awe. "Like, they're super light, but they're there! Oh man, how have I never noticed them before?! It feels like I'm staring at a new woman right now."

"Erm, yes," Weiss said, shying away from Ruby's gaze by tilting her head down to check on her hair.

"I was always curious where Chrys got her freckles but now I know," Ruby smiled, her shoe laces completely forgotten.

Weiss gave her a small, appreciative smile. "You've seen me without makeup before, Ruby. How have you never noticed them until now?"

"It was usually always dark by then," Ruby answered truthfully. "Plus, the last time I saw you without makeup, you were giving me other things to stare at. Two things"—she held up two fingers—"to be precise."

"There were freckles there too, you dolt," Weiss laughed.

"I don't know what you want me to say, Weiss," Ruby laughed along with her. She got up and cupped her girlfriend's face with both hands, her thumbs gently brushing over Weiss' freckles. "God, you're so beautiful," she whispered, appreciating every little freckle dotting Weiss' face. She wished she could kiss each and every one of them, but that might make Weiss' lips jealous and Ruby couldn't have that, now could she? "I am so lucky…"

Ruby leaned in for a kiss, but instead of Weiss' lips, she felt plush Vacuoan cotton pressed against her face.

"Huh?"

"You can kiss me once you take your shoes off," Weiss huffed with a blush as she pushed Ruby and her overeager lips back a step. "Shoes. Off. Now. I did not spend all morning cleaning just for you to get your muddy tracks all over my floor."

"Yes, Mom," Ruby grumbled compliantly.

Weiss' eyes went wide then immediately narrowed into an icy glare that froze Ruby on the spot. "Never call me 'Mom' ever again," she warned. "That legitimately sent shivers up my spine—and no, Ruby, not the good kind."

"You're no fun," Ruby pouted.

"Oh no, darling, I am a lot of fun," Weiss confidently shot back. "And I'll show you how much 'fun' I can be once you get those shoes off."

The moment those pesky shoes came off, Ruby was on Weiss faster than a blink of the eye, kissing her with all the passion she could muster. Ruby hugged Weiss' slim waist tight, pulling her in closer and closer until there wasn't a single iota of space left between them.

"Ruby. Ruby," Weiss called in a breathy tone between needy kisses. "Ruby, stop," she said, putting a hand on Ruby's shoulder. "We need to talk for a second, please."

Ruby immediately stopped upon the request and gave Weiss a bit space, but she didn't let go of her. "What's up?"

"I want you to take a shower," Weiss said. "You got back here really quick so I'm guessing you ran."

"Uh, yeah."

"Oh, then you're definitely taking a shower," Weiss chuckled, her nose crinkling. "And during that shower, I want you to think long and hard about whether or not you want to continue where we left off."

"Er," Ruby quirked an eyebrow, "I don't really need to think about that, Weiss. Why do you keep asking if I'm ready? Like, you know I am. I'm ready. Good to go whenever you are."

Weiss shook her head as she unraveled Ruby's scarf and took off her toque, staring at it fondly before tucking it into Ruby's pocket. She folded and hung the scarf over her forearm then turned her attention to Ruby's jacket.

"Weiss?" Ruby said, tilting her head curiously. "You okay?"

"I-I'm sorry, yes, I am," Weiss weakly smiled. "I know you say you are," she continued in a kind, motherly tone, unzipping Ruby's jacket and the sweater she wore beneath it with care, "but I'm going to keep giving you these chances until the last second."

"Why though?" Ruby asked. She let Weiss take her things and followed her to the kitchen table where Weiss neatly hung them on a chair. "Weiss?"

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I got lost in my thoughts and forgot you can't read minds."

"It's okay," Ruby said, wrapping her arms around her girlfriend's shoulders. "I just want to understand why you're hesitating. I mean, you kinda jumped me the first chance you got. But now that we're officially together-together, you've been putting up all these stop signs."

"I was hasty that night," Weiss confessed. "It was wrong of me, and I realized my mistake shortly after. I just wanted you so badly that I got a little ahead of myself."

"I wanted you too, Weiss," Ruby said, placing a soft kiss against Weiss' temple. "And I've only wanted you more since. But that still doesn't explain why you're hesitating now."

Sighing, Weiss rested her head against Ruby's shoulder and said, "I don't want you to feel pressured or that we rushed things too soon. I don't want you to look back on this moment and think 'I shouldn't have done that.' "

Ruby nodded her head in understanding. She had deduced that the issue had something to do with Weiss' own first time and the mental hang-ups still she had. Ruby was genuinely touched and happy that Weiss worried about her, but this was starting to get ridiculous. Weiss needed to know that despite how sweet her worries were, they had no ground to stand on here. Ruby was ready weeks ago, and she was going to keep reminding Weiss of that fact until she believed her.

"Weiss," Ruby said in a calm, steady voice, "I'm ready. I want to do this with you."

"And I want this just as much as you," Weiss replied, slipping her arms around Ruby's waist. "Please, just humour me. Take that shower and think it over one last time. I promise this'll be the last time I ask you."

Annoyed, Ruby thought about arguing how she'd already given clear consent, but the pleading look on Weiss' face made her think that maybe one more couldn't hurt. Hell, Weiss was smart. She knew what she was talking about and there really wasn't any harm in thinking over things while getting to enjoy a nice shower—wait, was Weiss subtly telling her she smelled bad? Ruby thought about how she ran to and from the convenience store and how hot she felt below the collar… plus, these weren't the freshest clothes…

"I will," Ruby replied, kissing Weiss again. "I'll think it over carefully and make sure there isn't a single shred of doubt left in me."

Lifting her head, Weiss stared into Ruby's eyes and smiled at her gratefully. "There's a towel in the bathroom waiting for you. You can use whatever you'd like in there."

"Okay."

"Don't keep me waiting too long though," Weiss added with a playful wink.

"Why wait?" Ruby laughed, feeling strangely bold. "Join me, Weiss."

"Another day and that offer would be too good to deny," Weiss replied, tracing the underside of Ruby's jaw. "But alas, I have my own mental preparations to do."

"Aw," Ruby pouted. "Next time?"

"Next time," Weiss said, sealing the promise with a kiss.

She showed Ruby to the master bathroom and left her to her own devices. Ruby hadn't been in here before, though she had seen brief glimpses when Weiss slipped in to freshen up. It was nice and spacious but everything was needlessly modern and fancy. Honestly, who needed a sink that large? And the faucet! How did it work? It was just a metal pipe, a circular piece of glass, and a little toggle in the middle. Ruby wanted to shudder at the gross opulence, but her curiosity won out in the end.

"That is so cool," she whispered when the water gently poured out over the glass, creating a small waterfall. "Ugh, that is so cool…"

Ruby turned the sink off and quickly began stripping down, kicking her clothes off to the side so she didn't trip on them later. And true to her word, Weiss had left a fresh towel waiting for Ruby, but there was something else too. Next to the towel was a robe just like Weiss' hung on a hanger.

"Whoa…" Ruby said in awe as she ran her hands over the soft fabric. She inspected it fully expecting to see Coco's initials embroidered on the breast but instead she found her own. "R.R… aw, Weiss, you spoil me."

Leaving the robe behind, Ruby stepped into the shower and slid the glass door closed. It was strange having to do that. All the showers she'd been in before only had a curtain for privacy. And despite knowing that she was perfectly safe from any would-be peepers and creepers, especially in her girlfriend's private shower, Ruby still felt exposed. The clear glass doors and the large open space made her feel like she was in an aquarium for all to see. It made her a little self-conscious.

'Okay, okay,' she thought to herself, shaking her head to clear her thoughts, 'enough. No one's gunna look. This is Weiss' bathroom. No one but her is going to come in here. This isn't the high school shower room.'

Ruby ground the heel of her palm into her eye trying to snuff out the tears threatening to seep out. Despite everything she'd said and done, Ruby was still a little scared. It was a mix between first time jitters and self-consciousness. Ruby worked hard to keep herself in shape so she was confident about that, it was the rest of herself that she wasn't so sure of.

Looking down at Crescent Rose with teary eyes, Ruby thought about how comfortable Weiss was when she dealt with it. She acted like it was an everyday normal thing and not some ugly genetic mutation that caused Ruby nothing but grief growing up. Then again, of course Weiss as comfortable seeing a woman with one, she was married to someone who had it too. To her it was an everyday occurrence.

"Fuck, I'm dumb," Ruby quietly laughed.

Every time they'd gotten close, it was usually always Ruby who put up the limitations by shying away or shifting her body whenever Weiss got close to touching her there. Her birthday, that night they spent together after her party, and the few days in between those two events—it was always Ruby. Well, that ended today. She was resolved to tell Weiss about everything she thought of, her anxieties, the struggle, and lastly the final confirmation they both needed to proceed. Ruby would bare it all in both the physical and metaphorical sense. No more secrets like these, Weiss deserved Ruby's full disclosure.

After deciding on a conclusion, Ruby set her serious thoughts aside and took a moment to figure out the shower controls and choose what products she'd use. She'd been in the shower for a while now, it was about time to actually use it.

Weiss had a whole line up of fancy looking body washes, shampoos, and conditioners all neatly sorted on a small shelf built into the wall. Ruby opened each bottle and sniffed them. They all smelled like Weiss to her, but one body wash did stand out based on the label alone.

"Hello, what's this?" Ruby said curiously.

She sniffed the bottle again and thought long and hard about what she just smelled. It was a familiar sweet floral scent, almost like baby powder. But it was a little overpowering so Ruby sniffed it again but from a slight distance and realized why it drew her in so easily.

"So it's you!" Ruby cheered. This was the Moonlight-whatever thing Weiss used on their special occasions.

Smiling, Ruby set the bottle aside to use later. The shampoo and conditioners though were a much easier pick: green apple. She loved the way it smelled on Weiss. It made Ruby want to eat her up each time she used it so she hoped it would have the same effect on her.

Ruby reached for the shower controls but stopped when she realized there wasn't a shower head or even one of those handheld shower thingies in sight. She quickly looked around and found her target high above her head, imbedded in the ceiling. She stepped to the side and cranked the knob. Water began pouring down like rain. A few droplets splashed onto Ruby, sending chills running up her spine. Too cold! Turning the other knob, Ruby hesitantly put her hand into the steady stream and sighed in relief. The water was warmer, but not warm enough. She kept turning the knobs until the temperature was just right and finally stepped in.

"Oh wow," Ruby said to herself as she closed her eyes and let the water wash away all her nerves.

She stood there quietly for a few minutes, mind clear of all negativity. Her muscles had relaxed significantly under the steady stream and the constant heat. It was so gentle compared to the skin ripper she had back home. Yang swore by it and refused to change it out, but if she tried Weiss' shower, then maybe she'd change her mind. Then again, Ruby could keep this luxury to herself and let Yang suffer on her own the way she made Ruby suffer all these years. Yes, that sounded like a good plan. An excellent plan even!

Ruby snickered and wiped the water off her face, feeling the smile fade from her lips. She'd never actually do that. Weiss' luxuries weren't Ruby's to share no matter how much fun it would be to gloat about it.

Weiss.

Ruby looked down at herself. Could someone like her really hold someone like Weiss so intimately? The woman that held her before was strong and dependable with a name that carried Weiss far in life, guaranteeing success and wealth far beyond Ruby's meager imagination. Compared to her, what did Ruby have to offer? Aside from all the love her body and soul could muster, all Ruby had to her name was a shitty job that could barely cover rent and food, partway through a degree she wasn't sure was right for her anymore, and a crushing amount of student loan debt that would take an honest miracle to fix. She was alright to look at though, that much she was confident of. But compared to Weiss and Coco? Ruby might as well start wearing a paper bag over her head.

Shaking and lifting her head, Ruby pushed her bangs back and let the water wash away everything else. These thoughts weren't good. She knew they weren't good. They were her awful insecurities given a voice. They weren't who she was—who Weiss cared about.

"Weiss isn't bothered," she firmly said to her fragile ego. It tried to argue back by rehashing all of her old worries and reminding her of all the times she got teased growing up, but Ruby shut it all down with a swift "She liked what she saw. And she's going to like everything else."

Ruby clenched her jaw and stepped out of the stream, wiping her face clean. That was the end of that conversation and she wasn't going to hear anymore of it. Thankfully, the negative voices quieted down after that and Ruby felt refreshed, resolute, and slightly more confident than she was before stepping into the shower.

Cleaning her body was easy work made even easier because everything smelled like Weiss. It was probably the most exciting shower Ruby had ever taken because she knew she was moments away from being enveloped by the real deal with nothing left between them but a few secrets and atoms.

Ruby was actually quite grateful for her moment of insight a week back. She had this gut feeling that things were going to take a turn soon so she started taking a bit more time to groom herself. And thank god she did or else this afternoon would've been far more embarrassing than it already was.

Memo to self, Ruby sighed, throw out all My Little Budgie underwear and pray to god that Weiss never brings it up.

There aren't enough words to accurately describe how mortifying that instance was. Ruby was certain Weiss would fall over and start laughing the moment she pulled Ruby's pants down. If their positions had been reversed, Ruby wouldn't have had the same maturity Weiss had. Forget a quiet girly giggle, Ruby would've been laughinghard enough to give herself an ab workout. Just the thought of the ever prim and proper Weiss Adel wearing a matching set of MLB undies was enough to set Ruby off.

Maybe I should get her a pair so we can match, Ruby laughed, that'd be fun.

After washing away the last bit of soap, Ruby turned up the heat. Weiss may have heated floors and a nice, toasty apartment, but Ruby liked stepping out of the shower feeling like a boiled lobster. And while she boiled, Ruby looked down at Crescent Rose with a deep frown. She poked it and gave it a good stroke, but nothing happened. Normally, that much stimulation was enough to get it to perk up, but it just hung there uselessly like a limp noodle.

"C'mon, Crescent Rose, show a little life, will ya?" Ruby stroked herself a bit more but, just like before, no reaction. "Seriously? C'mon, bro, don't embarrass me like this!" But despite her efforts, Crescent Rose continued to be nothing more than tofu in Ruby's hand. "Weiss gets her hands on you once and suddenly I'm not good enough anymore? Friggen traitor."

After getting out of the shower, Ruby quickly dried herself and slipped on her robe. It was every bit as comfortable as it looked. But she couldn't dwell on it for long because now was the moment of truth. Once Ruby stepped out of the bathroom, there would be no going back.

Leaving her clothes on the floor, Ruby took a deep breath and opened the door. Weiss was on the other side, sitting on her bed with her scroll in one hand and a glass of pink wine in the other. The condom box was on Weiss' nightstand practically drawing Ruby's attention in like a beacon. This was actually happening.

"H-Hey," Ruby said, giving Weiss a timid little wave.

Weiss glanced up and smiled. "The robe suits you."

"Thanks," Ruby blushed. "Please, never tell me how much it cost you."

"I promise."

"Kay, cool."

Weiss set her scroll down on her nightstand and took a sip of wine. "So," she carefully began, "have you thought things over like I asked you to?"

"Of course," Ruby said, padding over to her, "and the answer's still the same. I wanna do this, Weiss."

"Okay then," Weiss said, getting up.

"B-But first," Ruby quickly interjected, taking a cautious step back, "can I say something?"

"I'm listening," Weiss said, sitting down again. She offered the wine glass to Ruby.

"Thanks." Ruby took the glass and took a small sip. She wasn't a big fan of wine or grape juice in general, but this wasn't too bad. It was sweet and fragrant—never mind, it was still bad. The sour aftertaste made her wretch a little. "How can you drink this stuff?!"

Weiss laughed behind a hand and said, "It's an acquired taste, just like beer or any other alcohol."

"It's still icky," Ruby pouted, handing the glass back to Weiss. "So, anyway…"

"Would you like to sit down for this talk?"

"Er…" Ruby looked at the cushy spot next to Weiss and timidly nodded her head. "Yes, please."

"Silly girl, come here," Weiss said as she set the wine glass down and held her arms out for Ruby. "Whatever you have to say, I'm listening."

"Thanks, Weiss," Ruby smiled. She took the spot and the offered hug happily and snuggled in close to Weiss, pushing her down onto the bed so they could lie down and cuddle. "So, like you asked, I did a lot of thinking—real hard, big brain type of thinking. You'd be real proud of me, Weiss."

"I'm always proud of you," Weiss chuckled as she tightened her hold around Ruby's shoulders.

"Well, you're going to be even prouder!" Ruby insisted with a grin, but it quickly began to falter as she worked up the courage to actually speak.

Weiss didn't say a word and didn't seem like she was going to until Ruby found the words that escaped her. It gave Ruby some peace of mind to know her girlfriend was taking this seriously, but it also made her anxious. Weiss was mature beyond her years and Ruby… well, Ruby still wore character print underwear. What if Weiss thought Ruby's worries were silly and childish? What if she thought—Weiss pressed a finger between Ruby's furrowed eyebrows and smiled.

"You're thinking a little too hard there, ma chérie," she chuckled. "I can practically hear the gears turning in your head." Blushing, Ruby hid her face under the crux of Weiss jaw and mumbled and apology. "What for?"

"For being so nervous about this," Ruby replied. "I mean, it's just sex, right? We just gotta dive in and get it over with, right? I shouldn't be making it into such a big deal."

"But it is a big deal, Ruby," Weiss said, stroking Ruby's hair to help calm her down. "Something like this shouldn't be rushed. I want you to be as sure about me as I'm sure about you."

"I am sure though," Ruby insisted. "I've never been surer about anything in my life… I want to do this… I really do, and I was prepared for it last week, but I'm starting to realize I might not be as ready as I thought I was."

"Why is that?" Weiss asked patiently.

Biting her lip, Ruby inched back a bit and propped herself up to look Weiss in the eye.

"Hello, darling," Weiss smiled, cupping Ruby's cheek.

"Hi," Ruby grinned back, leaning into Weiss' touch. She brought a hand up to cradle Weiss' hand and pressed a kiss to her palm. "You have got to be magical, Weiss."

Chuckling, Weiss tilted her head and quirked an eyebrow. "What makes you say that?"

"Because while I was in the shower, I was bombarded with all these negative thoughts and feelings," Ruby answered truthfully. She intertwined their fingers and pressed another kiss against Weiss' palm. "But now that I have you in my arms, everything I worried about feels like a distant memory…"

"You are giving me far too much credit," Weiss said. "What were you worried about?"

"This and that…" Ruby mumbled, "mostly just things I experienced in the past."

"Like what?" Weiss asked with a bit of concern. She was starting to sound like a therapist and that made Ruby laugh.

"At first I was worried you wouldn't like me without any, y'know, clothes on…"

Weiss quirked an eyebrow. "What makes you think that?"

"Well," Ruby lied down next to Weiss and stared up at the ceiling, "I got teased a lot growing up because I wasn't a normal girl…"

"Ruby—"

"I know, I know," Ruby cut in. "I'm just saying what I thought back then—though, I guess I still think that way now if I'm still worried about it… but back then it was way worse. I hated being born this way. It made making friends hard. And when people started dating… it made me feel even worse because I didn't know if I liked boys or girls… I still don't know to be honest—but I like you!"

Ruby nervously looked at Weiss hoping she didn't offend her, but Weiss didn't look affected at all. In fact, she actually looked quite proud of the accomplishment.

"I like you a lot, Weiss," Ruby continued in a softer tone. "A lot more than I ever thought I could like someone else… and I guess that's why I'm so worried."

Weiss hummed in thought and pushed herself up so she could sit against the headboard. "I don't know if this'll help, but Nicole told me the same thing once."

"Huh?"

"That was my reaction too," Weiss chuckled. "It struck me as odd because she was usually always so full of herself—er, I don't think I phrased that right… um, I think what I was trying to say was she was sure of herself… is that the phrasing?"

"Yeah, that's the phrase."

"Right, so, when she told me that, I laughed," Weiss said with a strained smile. "I laughed really hard, and I inadvertently hurt her feelings because to me it didn't make sense. How could the person who boasted about sleeping with half the cheer squad and the swim team be confused about their sexuality? Granted, at the time, I wasn't so sure myself... I was fourteen and stupid with more money than a teenager should ever have, so I was spoiled and ignorant."

"I don't think you're either of those things," Ruby argued.

"You didn't know me back then, Ruby," Weiss smiled. "I was awful—the definition of entitled, if you will. But character faults aside, Nicole was the only person I'd been with, and boys never caught my interest the way girls did. So I thought, if she's with me, then she must definitely be interested in women only."

"Uh oh…"

"'Uh oh,' is right."

"How did she react?" Ruby asked.

"Nicole called me out on this behaviour and we didn't speak for close to two weeks," Weiss answered with a wince. "And like a typical spoiled brat, I didn't think about how she felt. I was so hurt and angry that she'd ignore me for such a small thing that I swore I'd never forgive her… but that lasted for about a day because I became acutely aware that she… was technically my only friend and the only person brave enough in the entire school willing to talk to me. So I swallowed my pride and apologized to her. We talked and she explained why she was upset… and I learned a few things."

"What kinda things?"

"A lot of things," Weiss said. "About her, me, and the general disconnect between what I knew and what the rest of the world knew."

"Er," Ruby blinked, "that's a little too deep for my understanding."

"Okay," Weiss laughed, "maybe I should back it up a bit and say that the reason for my ignorance is because that 'condition' you and Nicole struggled with is a commonplace occurrence to me."

"Huh?"

"My sister was born with it, and it's an honest miracle I wasn't," Weiss explained with a silent laugh. "A good majority of my relatives were born with it as well, so to me it was just normal. I was actually extremely envious of my sister because she didn't get paraded around like a show pony… but that's an entirely different story."

"If it was normal to you, does that mean your family worked with dust?"

"One of the world's largest conveyers, yes," Weiss replied with a distant look in her eyes. She blinked it away soon enough and said, "Nicole's family works with it too, but no where near to the extent my biological family did. She's been the only recent case."

"Huh," Ruby said, mulling over Weiss' words carefully. "So you're really not bothered at all?"

"Not even the slightest." Then a second later she added, "I think I honestly prefer it."

Ruby snorted and Weiss casually laughed along with her.

"Y'know, I was always scared of this moment," Ruby said carefully, threading her fingers through Weiss'. "I didn't know what sort of person I'd fall for or if I'd ever trust someone enough to even get to this point. I was okay with never getting here actually. It was less stress and worry."

"We don't have to do this, Ruby," Weiss said. "I don't mind."

"I'm not trying to back out," Ruby huffed in annoyance. She puffed out her cheeks, but Weiss deflated them in an instant. "Look, I'm just saying that… I-I'm glad I found you."

"I'm glad I found you too."

"So…" Ruby nervously glanced at Weiss, "what do we do now?"

Weiss quirked an eyebrow and shrugged. "Whatever you want to do, Ruby."

"Can I kiss you?"

"You may," Weiss replied.

Ruby tilted Weiss' chin up and kissed her. It started off innocently with a few pecks here, a nibble there, and some curious hands that didn't know where to go just yet. Ruby blindly went about touching Weiss where she knew it was okay, but never lingering long enough to test the extent. However, when Weiss slipped a hand under Ruby's robe and touched her bare skin, it suddenly became clear that there were no longer any restrictions.

Emboldened, Ruby pushed Weiss onto her back and got on top of her, slotting herself comfortably between Weiss' legs. A quiet chuckle escaped Weiss' lips as she wrapped her arms around Ruby's neck and kissed her cheek.

"Come here," she said with a coy smile, "you've kept me waiting long enough."

"Sorry," Ruby smiled back. "Um, so… do I just?" She ground herself against Weiss to show what she meant.

"If that's what you want to do then be my guest," Weiss replied, reaching down to tug on the sash keeping Ruby's robe closed. "We can do it hard and fast or we can take it nice and slow," she glanced up and smiled, "all that matters is that we have fun."

Ruby gulped and nodded her head nervously. The knot was almost undone and the robe was beginning to grow slack, giving Weiss a decent view.

"Ruby, I fully intended to let you be on top, but at the rate we're going, we might just run out of time," Weiss said rather impatiently.

"Right, right, you gotta pick up Chrys… um," Ruby gulped and nodded her head again. "W-Whatever you think is best, Weiss. I trust you."

"Okay," Weiss said as she carefully pushed Ruby off of her. "I want you to sit up against the headboard." Ruby scooted back until her back hit the headboard. She looked to Weiss patiently. "Are you comfortable?"

"Y-Yeah…"

"Use the pillows behind if you need to."

Thinking it was a good idea, Ruby reached behind her back and tugged on Weiss' pillow until she was sitting comfortably in the middle of it. She gave Weiss a thumbs up and an excited grin.

"What's next?" she asked eagerly.

"Next," Weiss said as she laid a hand on Ruby's shoulder and climbed on top of her, "you let me do all the work."

"That doesn't sound fair," Ruby pouted, laying her hands on Weiss' waist. Her fingers were itching to explore, but Ruby willed herself to sit still be good. "There's gotta be something I can do."

"Oh, you'll be doing plenty, Ruby," Weiss purred seductively. She leaned in and kissed Ruby gently while her hands settled on Ruby's neck. "You're so warm…"

"I think you're warmer…" Ruby whispered back, nuzzling her nose against Weiss'.

Weiss breathed in deep and kissed Ruby's cheek but she suddenly ripped herself away and gasped, "I just remembered something!" She quickly stretched over to the other nightstand and said, "Sorry, Nic, but you need to look away for a bit."

Blinking in confusion, Ruby watched Weiss turn her wife's photo around. It was a simple gesture that Ruby would've normally laughed off, but she noticed something that made her hesitate. Weiss' hand was trembling when she reached out. She also had a worried look clouding her pretty blue eyes that made Ruby worry even more. There was something heavy on Weiss' mind that she wasn't telling Ruby and that hurt quite a bit considering how open they'd been thus far.

Ruby wasn't so blinded by love that she didn't know Weiss was still hurting. It was clear as day to Ruby so she never tried to push the issue. But Weiss did push, and she did try, and she convinced Ruby she ready, but did she convince herself? Everything until now said yes, but could it all have been a front to try and prove that she was okay? Ruby may have a small piece of Weiss' heart, but the rest that didn't belong to Chrys still belonged to the woman in that photo. Was Weiss really ready to take this step? Was it a mistake to even try? These thoughts continued to heedlessly spiral around in Ruby's head until Weiss cupped her cheek and smiled.

"Now where were we?" she said, smiling even brighter, but something about it still felt forced.

"Weiss," Ruby said, her brows furrowed together, "are you sure this is what you want?"

Weiss blinked and, for just a split a second, her smile dropped. She quickly recovered though and smiled just brightly as she did earlier; however, instead of putting Ruby at ease, it made her stomach twist even further.

"Look who's being a worry worm now," Weiss smirked, poking one if Ruby's cheeks.

Shaking her head, Ruby refused to let that be the end. She took both of Weiss' hands into hers and brought them up to her lips. Ruby kissed Weiss' ring finger and stared up at her imploringly.

"I'm asking because you're trembling," Ruby said carefully. Weiss had a tendency to shut down and brush things off so Ruby had to word things precisely. She couldn't afford any mistakes here.

"Oh," Weiss gasped, her eyes growing wide. "I-I was hoping you wouldn't notice."

"How could I not notice?" Ruby asked. "You're shaking like a leaf, baby…"

Weiss sighed and hung her head, avoiding Ruby's worried gaze. "Alright," she said, pulling away to finish the last of her wine, "I am extremely nervous." Ruby nodded her head, looking at Weiss like she had just told her the sky was blue. "This is a big step, I don't want to take this lightly…"

"I don't wanna do that either."

Weiss nodded her head while she mulled over her words carefully.

"I've only been with one person, and I never thought I'd be with anyone else," Weiss confessed nervously. "A part of me feels dirty for even considering it… that's why I was so eager it get done and over with before."

"Dirty?" Ruby blinked in confusion. "Why?"

"I don't know," Weiss said, ruffling her hair in frustration. She pinched her eyes closed, took a deep breath, then let out a long, aggravated sigh like she was about to do something she truly didn't want to do. "I want to blame my strict, conservative upbringing, but that's a total lie… you can't go two feet in Atlas without hearing about someone's affair."

"That's impressive," Ruby murmured.

"I'll tell you a few stories next time," Weiss snidely laughed. "Ugh… god damn it."

Seeing Weiss struggle like this, Ruby couldn't help but reach out to her. It was only for a few seconds, but that little bit of contact worked wonders on Weiss' troubled mind. She let out a softer sigh then slumped her shoulders in defeat.

"Weiss?" Ruby said, tilting her head curiously.

Weiss sighed again and set the wine glass aside. "I like you a lot, Ruby. I've honestly never felt this way before. Nic and I, we only grew to love each other over the course of our marriage." She grabbed the black box next and carefully tore the seal with her fingernail. "Sure there was always a spark between us—she was gorgeous and charming—but there was never a time in our early relationship where we ever felt right together. Not like with you. I feel right with you…"

Ruby watched Weiss curiously but suddenly tensed when she watched her open the box and rip out the first packet. She handed it Ruby then put the box back like she had offered her a stick of gum and not a thing for…

"Do you know how to use this?" Weiss asked in her scary business president voice.

"Uh, yeah?"

Weiss arched an eyebrow then narrowed her eyes. "Do you really know?" she asked again in a lower tone that scared Ruby.

"I-I do…" Ruby shakily confirmed. "I, uh, practiced last week…" But Weiss' pointed gaze didn't let up. Ruby couldn't be angry at her though because she knew condoms were only effective if they were used right. So to put Weiss' mind at ease, Ruby toughened up and said, "Weiss, I promise you, I know how to put it on."

A few seconds passed and Ruby was beginning to sweat. She felt like she was being judged and dissected for a lie she hadn't told.

"Okay," Weiss nodded her head. "But if at any moment you aren't sure, I need you to tell me immediately."

"I promise," Ruby said. "But you were saying something before this—something kind of important."

Sighing, Weiss rolled her left shoulder and nodded her head. "There's not much more to say," she said carefully. "Being here with you feels right… and me being nervous is because I'm excited."

"I'm excited too," Ruby said as she cupped Weiss' face and brought her close. Their noses touched and Ruby grinned. "Your nose is cold."

"So are my hands and feet," Weiss pouted.

Laughing, Ruby lifted Weiss' chin and kissed her lips. "Mm," she hummed, "you smell like roses."

"And you…" Weiss suddenly went rigid after taking a breath. "Damn it, not you too."

"What?"

Weiss leaned back and covered her eyes with a hand. She shook her head then peeked through her fingers to look at Ruby.

"That body wash you used—ugh, I'll explain it another day," Weiss said, dropping her hand.

"But I wanna know!" Ruby pouted.

"You might not like the answer," Weiss replied with a slight blush and a small smile that told Ruby more than Weiss realized. "Anyway, we're not here to discuss body wash."

"You sure? Because we can—"

Weiss gently cupped Ruby's face and kissed her.

---

SC was written under an extreme time crunch so I took this break to go back and add in the things I couldn't do before. I'll be posting the new edits with each new chapter, all with varying amounts of changes. Chapter one has the largest change thus far though so please give that a quick read.

Chapter nineteen is being broken into three chapters... because it was about 34k unedited.

Merry Christmas in April.