Chapter Thirty-two: Can You Save Me Now?
Ruby felt a gentle tap, tap, tapping on her cheek and turned on her side to ignore it. But the tapping continued and slowly picked up in pressure until Ruby finally gave in and cracked an eye open.
"Chrys?" Ruby murmured blearily. "Wha?"
"Hey, Ruby," Chrys said with a shy little smile.
"What time is it?" Ruby asked as she sat up and stretched.
"A little after eight," Chrys replied, poking Ruby's stomach. "I'm hungry, but Mama's still asleep and I'm not allowed to use the stove."
"Right, right…" Ruby tiredly blinked and nodded. "What do you want for breakfast, bud?"
"Can we make pancakes again?"
"Pancakes? Yeah, yeah sure… just…" Ruby yawned and stretched again, "gimme a sec to wake up."
"Sorry for waking you up," Chrys said. "I tried waiting for one of you to wake up…"
"Hey, hey, no, it's okay," Ruby said, sliding off the couch to hug Chrys. "I'm glad you woke me up because now we can hang out and make your mom breakfast in bed. Sounds like fun to you, bud?"
Chrys immediately perked up at the suggestion and nodded. "Can we make it fancy? Mama likes fruit on her pancakes."
"Ugh, your mom is so bougie… but yeah," Ruby said. "You guys still have some berries in the fridge, right?"
"Why are you asking me?" Chrys laughed. "You ate them all last time." Ruby blushed and pouted. "I think we still have some raspberries though."
"Does she even like those?"
Chrys shrugged. "Try it for science?"
"For science!" Ruby cheered. "Alright, I'm up. Let's get started—but quietly, okay?"
"Like ninjas," Chrys giggled.
"Yeah, like ninjas." Ruby high-fived Chrys and followed her to the kitchen. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm okay, why?" Chrys asked with her head buried deep in the fridge.
"Just checking," Ruby answered as she grabbed all the dry ingredients out of the shelf. Why Weiss put them up so high she'd never know, but maybe it was a habit born from being with someone so tall for so long. "You gave us quite the scare last night."
"I'm sorry…"
"Nothing to be sorry for," Ruby said with a gentle chuckle. "It happens, but do you want to talk about it? You know I'm all ears if you need me to be."
"Not really," Chrys said, carrying the wet ingredients to the counter. She knew the recipe by heart now and only really needed Ruby around to use the stove. "But maybe later."
"Sounds good," Ruby said, sitting back to let Chrys get to work.
"Hey, Ruby?" Chrys asked, mid-measurement.
"Hm?"
"You're not going to leave us, right?"
Ruby raised an eyebrow. "No, never. What makes you say that?"
Chrys shook her head and let the conversation end there. Ruby watched her with mild concern and wanted to press her for more information, but she felt it wasn't her place to ask just yet.
"I think I'm done mixing, Ruby," Chrys said as she pushed the bowl closer to Ruby for inspection.
Ruby peered into the bowl and took the wooden spoon Chrys used to stir. "It looks about right," Ruby said, dipping the spoon carefully into the mixture. "Not too smooth and not too runny. Yup, we're done. Get the pan!"
"I got the pan!" Chrys held the pan up like a sword. "Can I try flipping the pancakes?"
"Are you up for it?"
"Yeah," Chrys grinned.
"We'll flip off the stove then," Ruby said, ruffling Chrys' hair. "I don't know why your mom doesn't allow you to use the stove though."
"She's scared I'll catch on fire like Maman did," Chrys answered.
Ruby blinked and nodded her head as if it was a normal occurrence. It wasn't her place to question Weiss' parenting methods, and Ruby sure as hell didn't want to invest too much brainpower trying to decipher a ten-year-old's ramblings.
"Do you think Mama will like the surprise?" Chrys asked while Ruby turned on the stove and greased the pan.
"Any surprise from you will make her happy," Ruby replied as she scooped up some batter with a ladle and carefully poured it into the pan. The batter spread out slowly and evenly, making a near-perfect circle. She waited until the batter started bubbling before taking the pan off the stove and handing Chrys the spatula. "You ready?"
"Ready!" Chrys exclaimed, spatula in hand.
Ruby helped Chrys hold the pan and guided her hand with the first flip. The spatula easily slipped under the pancake and, with a little patience, Chrys managed to flip it.
"I did it!" Chrys cheered excitedly.
"Great job, buddy," Ruby grinned. "Now let's get this bad boy back on the stove. Think you can handle flipping the rest without my help?"
"Yup!" Chrys replied with a big toothy grin.
It astonished Ruby to see how gung-ho Chrys was after last night's debacle. She was moving around and laughing like normal without a hint or trace of the scared little girl Ruby saw less than ten hours ago. It was hard not to get swept up by Chrys' enthusiasm though and they ended up blowing through all the batter in record time. They made three plates of pancakes with Weiss' having the most effort put in. Chrys insisted on bringing her mother's food personally so Ruby offered to wake Weiss, but Chrys insisted on doing that too. She was adamant on making the surprise special by herself to show Weiss her gratitude. Ruby didn't argue. In fact, she encouraged Chrys and asked her what else she wanted to do.
"Can we make a card?" Chrys asked. "I have some construction paper in my room."
"The pancakes'll get cold soon though," Ruby said. Chrys' face fell. "Buuuuut…"
"But?" Chrys perked up a little.
"Instead of the card, why don't you just say whatever you wanted to write down?" Ruby suggested. "Your mom's got a great memory. I'm sure she won't forget this."
"No, Mama's just spiteful and bitter," Chrys giggled.
"What?" Ruby blinked.
"Maman used to say that about her a lot," Chrys said. "She said Mama complains a lot about the people she doesn't like and it makes her remember them even more."
"I wouldn't exactly call that spiteful or bitter," Ruby awkwardly chuckled, wondering if Weiss knew her wife and child talked about her like this.
"Eh, but Mama says she is too," Chrys pouted with clear confusion written on her face.
Ruby blinked and groaned. Of course Weiss did.
"I like your idea though," Chrys said. "Can I use it?"
"Sure thing," Ruby replied with a tired grin.
"Yay!" Chrys cheered.
"Okay, back to the mission then. You got the tray?" Ruby asked. Chrys nodded her head and showed off her firm hold. "Okay, bud, careful with the juice—actually, do you want me to carry that?"
"I think I got it," Chrys said. "I just have to walk slowly."
"Okay, if you're sure then I'll leave you to it," Ruby said.
Ruby followed closely behind Chrys as they practically tiptoed towards Weiss' bedroom. Ruby opened the door and Chrys poked her head in to search the room. They found Weiss sleeping soundly with her blanket pulled up to her ears.
"Set the tray down on the nightstand," Ruby whispered to Chrys.
Chrys nodded and snuck into the room, tiptoeing towards Weiss' nightstand as carefully as she could. Ruby hung back and watched.
After setting the tray down, Chrys started poking her mother's cheek. This was when Ruby quietly took her leave and started preparing a second tray. Chrys had been so focused on making sure Weiss' surprise was perfect that she forgot her own breakfast. Ruby found it adorable and somewhat painful at the same time. She couldn't remember ever doing something like this for her own mother. Summer was always up before dawn and out the door for work before Ruby and Yang were even halfway through their cereal. And now that Ruby thought about it, she couldn't remember doing anything special for her mother. Giving her a picture she drew at school to hang on the fridge didn't count because Summer put everything she could on it, even Yang's terrible test scores. Ruby glanced at Weiss' pristine stainless steel refrigerator and wondered if Weiss kept Chrys' test scores and pictures.
Ruby took her time assembling Chrys' tray to give the mother and daughter ample time to talk, but Chrys wasn't having it. She ran back to the kitchen and puffed out her cheeks.
"Ruby!" Chrys huffed. "Why'd you leave?!"
"Uh," Ruby blinked and pointed to the tray. "I was getting you a tray."
"Oh." Now it was Chrys' turn to blink. "Well, c'mon! Mama's waiting."
"Waiting for what?" Ruby asked.
"For all of us to eat breakfast together," Chrys said, stealing the third plate of pancakes from the counter. "Don't forget the syrup!"
"Aye, cap'n," Ruby laughed as she grabbed the syrup bottle and another fork.
Weiss was carefully cutting into her pancakes when Ruby and Chrys came back.
"So this is why you ran off," Weiss said.
"Mama, Ruby's mean!" Chrys cried with an accusing finger pointed at Ruby.
"Ack, why?!" Ruby gasped.
"You left when you said you wouldn't," Chrys said.
"Yeah, to give you two some privacy and to get your pancakes," Ruby shot back.
"I could have gotten it myself."
"Yeah, well, I beat you to it," Ruby grinned, ruffling Chrys' hair. "Now c'mon, let's eat these before they get cold."
"Beat you guys to it," Weiss said just before she stuffed a hearty helping in her mouth. "Oh, wow, these are really good!"
Ruby flashed Weiss a grin and said, "You should thank your little chef then."
"Hm?"
"Yeah, I did all the measuring and stirring!" Chrys said. "Ruby also helped me flip the pancakes. I got really good at that."
"And before you ask, Weiss, I didn't let her use the stove," Ruby said, rushing to Chrys' defence.
"Oh, I wasn't worried about that at all," Weiss said as she cut into her pancakes again. "I trust you to keep her safe. Now, you both need to get into bed with me before I turn on the news."
"Not the news!" Chrys yelped. She looked between the plate of pancakes she was carrying and the tall bed Weiss sat in. "Um… um…"
"Put my plate on the tray," Ruby said, kneeling down slightly.
"Thank you!" Chrys put the plate on the tray as carefully as she could before rushing into bed and under the covers. She scooted in as close as she could next to Weiss and stole a raspberry. "Ruuuby! I thought you were supposed to be faaast!"
"Oh, I am, but do you really want me to risk our pancakes just to beat you?"
"Oh."
"How about this," Ruby said as she set Chrys' tray down in front of her, "we'll race the next time we go to the convenience store."
"One on one?" Chrys eagerly asked.
"Yup." Ruby took back her plate and sat on the floor, back against the bed. "Pass the syrup when you're done with it."
"Why are you sitting on the floor?" Chrys asked with a giggle as she poured a generous amount of maple syrup on her pancakes.
"I don't trust myself to eat on the bed," Ruby replied, holding a hand out for the syrup. "Now gib. Gib me syrup."
"You're so weird sometimes," Chrys said.
"But she's cute so I'll keep her for a little longer," Weiss jokingly chimed in.
They all shared a quick laugh and dug into their pancakes, watching Saturday cartoons until the late afternoon. Chrys ended up falling asleep again so Ruby and Weiss had some time to clean and decompress. Weiss was practically dead on her feet now that she didn't have to pretend and explained that she only just managed to fall asleep a couple of hours ago. Ruby suggested a nap, but Weiss declined and leaned on her for support instead.
Ruby wrapped her arms around Weiss' small frame and kissed her temple. "It's okay for Super Mom to take a break, y'know?"
"Oh, Super Mom would love to go back to sleep," Weiss chuckled. "It's her alter ego Company President that can't afford to."
"The company won't catch on fire if you avoid checking your emails for one day, baby," Ruby said. "You had a rough night last night. You deserve some rest. Even more so now that you know Chrys is okay."
"I don't know if she is though," Weiss whispered. "The only reason why I was up so late was because she was still having nightmares. And how she even managed to wake up so early is a mystery to me because she tossed and turned all night."
"That explains the afternoon nap…"
"Mhm…" Weiss let out a big yawn before turning around and draping her arms around Ruby's neck. "Hello, mon amour," she murmured sleepily.
"Hi," Ruby replied, kissing the tip of Weiss' nose.
Weiss giggled and asked, "So what are your plans for today?"
"Dunno," Ruby shrugged. "The original plan for today was to stay in bed with you until we picked Chrys up. What do you want to do today?"
"Honestly, the same thing… but I guess we'll have to adjust." Weiss stole a quick kiss before stepping away to finish washing the dishes.
By the time they finished cleaning, Chrys had woken up asking for lunch and cuddles from her mother. Weiss crinkled her nose and smiled apologetically at Ruby before leaving her side to tend to one needy baby.
"What do you want for lunch?" Ruby asked as she dried her hands on a dishcloth.
"Dunno," Chrys mumbled as she lost herself in Weiss' warm embrace.
"Name the first thing that comes to mind and I'll get it—as long as Weiss agrees of course."
"Smart answer," Weiss smirked. Ruby flashed her a smile. "So what do you want, mon coeur?" Weiss asked, shifting her attention back to Chrys.
"Hm…" Chrys thought long and hard, her adorable face scrunched up. "Burgers!" she finally announced. Ruby looked to Weiss for permission as did Chrys. "Please, Mama?"
Weiss scrunched up her face in thought, but Ruby suspected it was more for show than anything else. As much as Weiss liked to play hardball with her coworkers and anyone ballsy enough to step up to her, she was an absolute softy when it came to Chrys.
But Chrys liked to play hardball too and batted her eyelashes at Weiss, hitting her with the most gut-wrenching puppy dog eyes ever. Ruby felt her resolve crumbling like sand—and she was already on board with the food to begin with! How was Weiss going to survive—
"Okay," Weiss said, giving in within seconds of the request. "Do you want our usual place or somewhere else?"
"Usual please!"
"Alright," Weiss said, ruffling Chrys' hair. "Do you want to eat there?"
"Can we?"
"I don't see why not," Weiss said, looking to Ruby for confirmation.
"I'm okay with it," Ruby said.
"Then let's get dressed and get going," Weiss said, kissing Chrys' forehead. "We'll order something to go as well so we have dinner tonight. Does that sound good?"
"You're the best, Mama!" Chrys hugged her mother tight before running off, nearly tripping on her way.
"Do you think I made her happy?" Weiss murmured softly.
Ruby didn't know if Weiss was asking her or that little voice in her head, but to show Weiss her support, Ruby walked over and hugged her from behind. She didn't say a word and just held Weiss, letting her process her thoughts and feelings without judgement or interruption.
Weiss leaned against Ruby and sighed, quietly whispering "I love you" like a prayer.
"Let's go get ready, baby," Ruby replied encouragingly.
"Okay."
Ruby led Weiss back to their bedroom and helped her get dressed, not caring that Weiss was fully capable of doing it herself. It was difficult for Ruby to see the woman she loved so despondent, but at the same time, she was touched that Weiss let her see her so vulnerable.
"Are you okay?" Ruby asked as she bent down to help Weiss put on her socks.
"I don't know…" Weiss murmured, her eyes glazed and unfocused.
"What's on your mind?"
"I just… I feel like I've failed her. I feel helpless." Weiss ran a hand through her hair and sighed. "I do so much to try and protect her. I've sent her to martial arts classes, taught her to avoid strangers, kept her safe from her greedy relatives—hell, I sent her to therapy! But… but all that doesn't matter because I can't protect her from herself. These nightmares are permanently scarring my baby and there's nothing I can do but hold her on the nights she comes to me."
"Hey, Weiss?" Ruby said hesitantly.
"Hm?"
"Earlier this morning, when Chrys woke me up…" Ruby gnawed on her bottom lip, worried about the possible line she was crossing, "she, uh, was still pretty shaken up."
"What do you mean?" Weiss asked, sounding more alert.
"Nothing bad, it's just… I should've told you earlier, but I couldn't find the time until now." Ruby sat on the bed next to Weiss and took her hand, holding it close. Weiss remained silent and patiently waited. "She asked me if I'd ever leave you guys. You know I'd never leave you, right?"
"I know," Weiss smiled, resting her forehead against Ruby's. "And even if you did want to leave, I won't let you go without a fight."
"Weiss, what Chrys said has me worried… it sounded like she's expecting me to just up and go at any moment."
"Don't be too worried," Weiss said with a thoughtful expression. "She's still adjusting to our new normal. Losing Nicole, the move from Atlas, and now you—it's a lot to take in. I'm barely keeping up myself, so just give her time and keep doing what you do."
"Okay," Ruby nodded, giving Weiss a quick kiss. "I'm here for the long haul, Weiss. I'm set on you and Chrys and there's nothing in this world that can change that."
"What about out of our world?" Weiss asked playfully.
"I'd like to see them try!" Ruby huffed. "It'll take something apocalyptic to take me away from you!"
"Mm, okay, I believe you," Weiss laughed.
"Feeling a little better?"
"A little," Weiss said, running a hand through Ruby's hair, staring at her fondly. "I love you."
"I love you too." Ruby gave Weiss a short but passionate kiss. "It feels so good to finally hear it…"
"I should have something sooner," Weiss replied, pulling Ruby in for another kiss. "I knew I loved you, but I wanted to be sure my heart could really handle it first."
"When did you know?" Ruby asked, nuzzling her nose against the shell of Weiss' ear.
"On my anniversary," Weiss softly answered. "You took care of me and set yourself aside, then you listened to me talk about Nicole… you held me and told me you would love me no matter what."
"And the statement still holds true." Ruby grinned. Weiss let out an airy chuckle that tickled Ruby's ear. "Whaaat? I'm being totally serious here."
"I know you are, mon amour," Weiss chuckled even louder.
"Good!" Ruby pouted.
"I wanted to tell you right then and there… but I was so scared," Weiss continued. Her tone was hesitant, but Ruby could feel Weiss' smile and the warmth of her cheeks pressed against her skin. "You made me feel so loved that night, Ruby."
"I'll do whatever I can to make you feel loved every night," Ruby said.
"I'll hold you to that promise tonight if things play out in our favour," Weiss purred.
"Oh, I like the sound of that," Ruby grinned. "But for now, let's get some food in Chrys' stomach."
Weiss laughed out loud and nodded. "She's eating so much nowadays, I think she'll be hitting a growth spurt soon."
"Don't worry, Weiss, you'll always be tall in my heart."
"Uh-huh, okay, smooth talker."
The day went by in a blink of an eye after that conversation. Ruby was so in the moment she didn't have time to dwell on Chrys' gnawing question. Instead, Ruby focused on how Weiss and Chrys ate burgers the exact same way. It was highly entertaining, and when Ruby brought it up, they spent the whole meal watching each other for subtle differences. There was none and Ruby fell in love with the family even more.
After lunch, they all went home—home. Ruby never noticed when she started thinking of Weiss and Chrys' home as her home. Home had always been wherever Yang was, but home was...
"Ruby!" Chrys shrieked when a ghost popped up on screen, shocking Ruby out of her ill-timed musings.
They were watching a horror movie in the dark living room under a pillow fort with snacks and juice. Chrys had jumped into Ruby's arms, shaking their fort at its foundation, making Weiss laugh out loud.
"How are you not scared?!" Chrys pouted.
Thinking fast, Ruby wrapped her arms around Chrys and said, "I got you and your mom with me. I got nothing to fear."
"Or you just weren't watching," Chrys intuitively pointed out, her eyes narrowed in suspicion.
"W-Well, your mom's so pretty, I couldn't help but stare," Ruby replied.
"Uh-huh…" Weiss said, unconvinced.
"It's true!" Ruby shouted in defence.
"Do you want to watch something else?" Chrys kindly offered instead of a rebuttal. "We've seen this one before anyway. I'm okay if we change the movie."
"No, I'm okay," Ruby said, shaking her head. "I'll pay more attention this time."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah."
"What were you thinking of anyway?" Weiss asked as she reached out of the fort to grab one of the many burgers they brought home.
"Well, you're gunna think it's silly," Ruby replied with a deep blush.
"Try us," Weiss said.
Ruby looked down at Chrys and patted her head. "I was just thinking about how nice it is being here with you guys. Feels like home to me."
"Of course this feels like home," Chrys said, poking Ruby's side with an innocent giggled. "You're family, Ruby."
"Huh?" Ruby blinked with surprise, her mouth slightly agape.
Chrys turned to Weiss and said, "She's family, right, Mama?"
Weiss took a second to think and unwrap her burger. She took a small bite and chewed thoughtfully, cruelly drawing out the anticipation.
"Mamaaaaa!" Chrys whined, switching her arms over from Ruby to Weiss. She shook her mother and called out her name again. "Mama, don't be mean! I don't want Ruby to leave!"
Weiss snorted out a laugh and ruffled Chrys' hair. "Ruby's not going anywhere, mon coeur."
"But…" Chrys pouted.
"Yeah, I'm not going anywhere, bud," Ruby said, scooting over to embrace the two people she loved the most. "Your mama doesn't have to say anything. I know this is where I belong."
"Mhm," Weiss nodded, leaning over to kiss Ruby's cheek. "But she is right, Ruby. You are family."
"Weiss…" Ruby looked at her lover, unable to speak. She was family. This was her home and this was her family.
"If you two are going to kiss, could you at least cover my eyes or tell me to look away?" Chrys huffed. "You guys are gross."
"Aw, that's mean," Ruby pouted.
"Don't care. Gross." Chrys puffed her cheeks out and crossed her arms.
Weiss rolled her eyes and said, "One day you'll find someone you'll want to kiss too."
"Eeehhh?" Chrys stuck her tongue out in disgust.
"You'll also want to spend as much time with them as you can and learn everything about them," Weiss continued.
"Yeah, no. Still gross," Chrys said. "I don't ever want to do that stuff with anyone."
"I used to think that too and then I met your maman," Weiss said, tapping Chrys' nose. "She made me change my mind pretty quickly."
"That's because Maman's super cool!"
"Mhm, the coolest," Weiss nodded with a tender smile, her eyes glistening with tears. Ruby wordlessly reached over and brushed her thumb carefully across Weiss' right eye to wipe it dry before cupping her cheek. Weiss leaned into Ruby's touch and said, "Chrys, I hope you know how lucky I am."
"Hm?" Chrys tilted her head, curiosity clear on her innocent face.
"A lot of people go through life without ever finding true love. I got lucky with your maman, but we were young and impulsive so it took us a long time to find our path…" Weiss' bottom lip trembled as she waded through a decade's worth of memories, both good and bad, "and when we lost her, I felt like I had lost my other half…"
"I had no idea, Mama…" Chrys said with sudden realization. She held her mother tight, arms trembling.
"I made a mistake by shielding you from my grief. I thought I was protecting you by not showing you, but all I did was hurt you. I made you think that losing your maman didn't affect me, but it did, Chrys. I felt empty, and if I didn't have you, I don't know how I would've gone on." Weiss wrapped her arms around Chrys and stroked her hair. "But by some miracle, I managed to find someone who loves me just as much as your maman did."
"Really?" Chrys hesitantly asked, glancing back at Ruby.
"Mhm," Weiss nodded. "And I hope it's clear that I love her just as much. But don't ever think, not even for a second, that I've stopped loving your maman, okay?"
"What about me?" Chrys asked.
"Huh?" Now it was Weiss' turn to tilt her head.
"What if you and Ruby have a baby? What happens to me?"
Ruby jerked forward and sputtered in surprise. "Chrys!" she yelped. "That's way too soon!"
"But it can happen right?" Chrys said, completely unfazed. "Mama's still really young. She isn't like my classmates' mamas."
"Uhh…" Ruby swallowed hard.
"What'll happen to me?"
"I thought you wanted a little sister?" Weiss said with an amused smile.
"I did before… but now? I don't know," Chrys pouted. "Am I going to get replaced?"
"Huh?" Ruby and Weiss said at the same time.
"Ruby isn't my mama. She likes me now, but what about later? I don't want to get replaced, Mama…" Chrys said as she started to tear up.
"Oh, mon coeur, why do you think you'll be replaced—wait, you don't think Ruby's here to replace your maman, right?" Weiss asked, tilting Chrys' chin up to get a good look at her. Chrys shook her head. "Then why are you thinking like this?"
"I don't know…"
"Chryssie, having a baby is a lot of work. And for a time, it'll feel like all the attention is on them. But if Ruby and I do have a baby—and that's a biiiig if—I promise we won't love you any less."
"Promise?" Chrys asked, though the question was more towards Ruby than Weiss.
"Promise," Ruby said, holding her right pinky out to Chrys. "I promise you, Chryssie, no matter what happens in the future, I'm never going to stop loving you."
Chrys hesitantly lifted her left pinkie up. "You're never leaving?"
"Never."