Author's Note: This is just an idea that popped into my head and I just had to write it down. I can definitely relate it to my life. Anyway, hope you like it. Read and review!
Summary: "We are friends. But if it was up to me, we'd be something more. I'm completely in love with him. And I have been for the past five years. He just doesn't know it." AU Oneshot Brooke & Lucas.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
Trapped Inside
I have this friend. His name's Lucas. We've been friends for a really long time. Well, that's what everyone thinks, anyway. Actually, that's a lie, too. We are friends. But if it was up to me, we'd be something more. I'm completely in love with him. And I have been for the past five years. He just doesn't know it.
Lucas and I aren't like other friends though. We're the kind of friends who won't talk for months, but when we do talk after that, it's like we never lost any time. And it's not like he's ashamed of me, but there's a lot of times when we're with other people that we just won't be hanging out together. It's more of a one-on-one thing. But we understand each other and are always there for each other, and those are the most important factors.
Sure, Lucas has had girlfriends over the years. They come and go. None were ever serious. Who can blame them, though? He's absolutely gorgeous. And he's got such charm. He really isn't a player either. You'd actually think he'd be the one guy who'd have the same girlfriend all four years of high school. But they tend to be short term, and usually it's them who break up with him. But it's only lately that I've started to get ridiculously jealous of them. That they could have him like that but I couldn't. So, without realizing it, I somehow manage to screw things up between him and his girlfriends. Lucas doesn't seem to notice so much, but the other girls do. I guess when they find out that he talks to me a lot and that he cares about me, they kind of just leave.
I really haven't had that many boyfriends. And I could probably hand that to Lucas, because everytime I go out on a date or something with a guy, I want that guy to be Lucas. So it never ends up working out well. He doesn't know that, though. I'll tell him it's because I'm picky with guys. A lot of times my friends will tell me things like "you should go after Lucas," or "you and Lucas would be so cute together," but I deny it. I don't know why, but I do.
Last Friday night, I went to a party at one of the basketball player's houses. I knew Lucas would be there, since he, too, plays basketball, and even though I'm not much of a party person, I went for that reason. My friend Peyton Sawyer and I went in together. It was just another typical party. People standing around drinking, the select few people making out against the back wall, loud music. I immediately did what I always do in a crowd of people: I glanced around the room hoping to see Lucas. I spotted him chatting with two girls, one that I knew from cheerleading, and the other I didn't know. His back was towards me, but I obviously knew it was him. I instantly felt jealous, but I couldn't say anything, because, like everyone else but me, Peyton doesn't know about my feelings towards Lucas.
"Oh, there's Jake." Peyton said, waving at her boyfriend, who was across the room.
"Cool. Go over to him, I'm gonna go see who's here." I said. She nodded and walked over to him. Feeling a little bit like a loser because I was standing there by myself, I decided to see what Bevin and Theresa, two of my friends from cheerleading, were up to. Luckily, they were standing decently close to where Lucas was, so once I was done with them, I could pretend like I just happened to see him and start up a conversation.
"Hey, girls." I said with a smile.
"Hey, Brooke. What's up?" Theresa asked.
"Not much. Just got here. How's this party going, anyway?" I questioned.
"It's okay. There's not many people here. We'll probably bail early." Bevin told me. Theresa nodded in agreement.
"Yeah." I replied. They got into a conversation that I was half paying attention to, because I was busy stealing glances at Lucas over my shoulder. After the third time, our eyes met, and I played it cool and smiled.
"Hey, Luke." I greeted him happily. I already felt butterflies in my stomach.
"What's going on, Brooke?" He asked, giving me a hug.
"Not much, I just got here. Who were you talking to?" I asked.
"Oh, just Cynthia and Gretchen." He replied. I nodded. What bitches.
"Bevin and Theresa said the party's kinda lame." I said softly. He made a face.
"Yeah. I'm probably gonna leave when Nathan does. He has to be up early tomorrow so I'm just gonna say that he's my ride and that I have to leave." Lucas explained.
"Yeah. Well, if you change your mind, I have my car so I can always drive you." I told him.
"Okay. Thanks. I'm gonna go get something to drink, you want anything?" He asked me.
"No, I'm good for now. But thank you." I said. He nodded and walked away. I returned to Bevin and Theresa for ten minutes. I hadn't seen Lucas come back in my direction, so I turned around. Much to my disliking, he was hooking up with Cynthia, one of the girls he had been talking to earlier. My heart sank. And so did my face. But I quickly changed it so no one would see. It wasn't like I'd never seen him with another girl before, but every time it hurt just a little bit more.
"Brooke? Brooke?" Bevin asked. I guess it was pretty clear that I wasn't focused in on the conversation.
"Oh. Sorry. I was, um, looking for...Peyton." I told her.
"She's right over there." Theresa said, pointing at her.
"Oh. Silly me." I joked. Or at least tried to, anyway. Bevin and Theresa continued to talk, and I continued to watch Lucas and Cynthia. What the hell was he doing with her, anyway? She wasn't pretty. Or smart. Or anything really. It was beginning to make me seriously mad. After giving it all I had to not throw Cynthia on the floor and stomp on her face, I had to stop it, and walked over to them, desperate to get them apart.
"Lucas!" I said, as if I was surprised to see him. He pulled away from their kiss.
"Oh, Brooke. What're you up to?" He asked, fixing his white Abercrombie and Fitch t-shirt. Cynthia gave me a dirty look and walked away.
"Not much. What was that all about?" I questioned.
"Cynthia?" He asked. I nodded. "Apparently someone dared her to hook up with the next guy that passed her by. I guess I was that guy. I don't know if I believe her though. She probably just wanted me. I don't blame her though. I mean, I do have stunning looks." He joked and laughed. I rolled my eyes and laughed back, silently wanting to say, "you're damn right,"push him back against the wall and kiss him. But I clearly wasn't about to do that.
"Sorry I interrupted." I said without an ounce of sincerity.
"Not a big deal. Oh, Nathan actually left a little while ago without telling me, so is it okay if I grab a ride with you?" He asked
"Of course." I replied. I looked into his piercing blue eyes as looked back into my brown ones and smiled. Sexual tension, maybe? Kinda? Okay. Maybe not. Then I saw him do a double take towards the door and I raised an eyebrow at him when he looked back at me.
"Jamie Quinn is here. You know, the new girl." Lucas told me, with a smirk. I nodded. Of course I knew. All the guys almost dropped to their knees in front of her the second she walked through the front doors of Tree Hill High two weeks ago. Just because she had sparkling green eyes and huge boobs, they thought she was some sort of goddess. Suddenly I realized what he might have in mind.
"I'm so hooking up with her tonight." Lucas said. Yeah, I was right. Thankfully, he was too busy staring at her to notice the look of frustration and jealousy on my face.
"That's...just great." I told him while I swished around the drink I had recently poured for myself. I really just wanted to smack him.
"Yeah. Okay. I'll talk to you later." He said as he whisked right past me to try and be the first guy over to Jamie. Jackass. Such a typical guy. I sighed and gritted my teeth and put some more ice in my drink to try and get my mind off of him for at least two seconds.
"Brooke?" A guy said from behind me. I turned around.
"Oh, hey, Mouth." I said to one of my good friends.
"How's it going?" He asked.
"Just fabulous." I answered. He nodded.
"You looked a little mad at Lucas just now. What was that over?" He asked.
"Oh, nothing. It wasn't a big deal." I told him, trying to change the subject.
"It was over Jamie, wasn't it?" He questioned. I looked at him.
"How'd you know?" I asked.
"I kind of overheard your conversation. And I saw him looking at her." He said. I nodded and glanced across the room to watch what Lucas was doing.
"I think someone's jealous." Mouth put out there. I opened my mouth in shock.
"I am not!" I lied. I don't think I could have stopped myself from blushing just a little bit. He laughed.
"Fine. Whatever you say. I gotta go find Erica." Mouth said, leaving me to go find his girlfriend. "Have fun."
"I'll try." I said. And he left. I continued to lean against the drink table and scanned the room. Lucas and Jamie were talking, unfortunately, Peyton was on the couch with Jake, that wasn't anything out of the ordinary, and Bevin and Theresa were still gossiping away. Yeah, this party was getting old fast.
A few minutes later, I joined Peyton and we chatted a little on the couch while I discreetly watched Lucas in anger as he practically drooled while talking to Jamie. They were about two seconds away from playing a serious game of tonsil hockey. And, not to my surprise, that's exactly what happened.
"Wow, Brooke you look a little lost and angry." Peyton said.
"Do I?" I asked, fury in my voice. She pulled back in surprise. By this time, I couldn't take it anymore. I had watched him do this so many times, but this was gonna be the last. For tonight, anyway. I got up quickly and walked over to them, pretended to trip, and spilled my drink on Jamie. She practically screamed and looked at me in disgust.
"Oh, gosh. I'm, uh, terribly sorry." I apologized completely sarcastically.
"What the hell, Brooke?" Lucas asked. His tone signaled that he obviously wasn't thrilled with what I had just done, but, hey, what did I care? I wasn't too thrilled with him tonight either.
"I'm leaving. Find your own ride home." I snapped. I stomped out of the house, tears threatening to spill from my eyes at any second. I had just run down the front steps when I heard him behind me. Damnit, why didn't I assume that he'd follow me?
"Brooke!" He yelled. I kept running towards the street. He yelled a second time. I stopped and turned around.
"What the hell was that all about?" He demanded, two feet in front of me.
"I don't know." I said softly. I wasn't sure if he heard me, but it was so quiet outside that he must have. A tear ran down my cheek, but he couldn't see it because it was completely dark out. He breathed out heavily.
"Fine. Goodnight." He said coldly. He walked back towards the house. I knew it right then that if I didn't say anything in those next few seconds, I was gonna lose him for good. Either that or I'd lose him for saying something anyway, so I figured I might as well say it. Everything that was trapped inside of me finally came out.
"I love you." I choked. He halted, his back still to me. I didn't know what was going to happen next, so I just let all of my feelings and hesitations out.
"You know, you're such an easy person to have a conversation with, yet I still can't find a way to talk to you online without sounding like a complete idiot." I began, thinking about all the times that I'd try and say something sarcastically or jokingly while talking through IM and he wouldn't get it, leaving me feeling really stupid. He turned around. More tears fell down my cheeks.
"And one day, you'll act like we're best friends and the next you'll practically ignore me and pretend like we don't even know each other." I continued. God, I hated when he did that. And unfortunately it was something that was happening all to often. He ran his fingers through his hair.
"And you're such a freakin' tease. There's times when I think to myself "God, you know, maybe he likes me, too." But then I realize that maybe you're just being the sweet guy that you are." I told him. He looked to the side, not quite sure of what to do.
"It killed me, you know, to see you in there, not only once, but twice, with another girl. It absolutely shattered my heart." I said. He was still standing in the same spot as he was before. About twenty feet away from me, and I couldn't even see his facial expression, only the shadow of his figure.
"And even though you drive me absolutely insane, I love you. And it hurts. But I finally said it." I finished. It was silent for a second. Upon not getting a response immediately, I wanted to shoot myself because I thought I had just made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. He started walking towards me when he finally spoke.
"How come you never told me any of this before?" He asked, holding his arms out in emphasis.
"I...I guess I was afraid." I admitted.
"Afraid of what?" He asked. At this point he was right in front of me.
"Being rejected. Or losing what little we have left of this friendship." I paused before speaking again. "I'm sorry. I made a mistake. I'm just gonna go." I said quickly, turning around. Before I could take a step, he grabbed my shoulder and spun me back around so I was once again facing me. This time, however, I was so close to him that I could feel his hot breath on my face.
"You'll never lose me." He whispered, pushing a lock of hair behind my ear. I sighed.
"How can you possibly guarantee me that?" I pleaded.
"Because I love you, too, Brooke." He said. I could have fainted. He actually loved me back. What I had been waiting for for five years had finally come. At the same time, I could have hit myself for not saying anything earlier. He pulled my face into his and kissed me with all that he had. I obviously returned the kiss. I couldn't think of anything I could have wanted more at that moment. Lucas was mine. And I was his. And for the first time in my life, my heart felt complete. What I thought was going to be the worst night of my life turned out to be the best.