Silver Rain

One-shot. During a rare summer storm on the islands, Kairi reflects on how things have changed...especially her feelings toward a certain someone... Featuring "Love's Recovery," by the Indigo Girls.

A/N: I have written this one-shot from Kairi's POV because I think it's fun to write her. Why? Because she has no character otherwise! Seriously, she's the only canon Mary-Sue that I have ever seen. Therefore, she is putty in any good author's hands. Plus, I write from Riku's POV too much anyway. If you've never heard "Love's Recovery"...you have to. But please, download it legally (iTunes, etc.) or buy the CD. That way, I can say I'm drumming up business and I hopefully will not have the pants sued off me.

Disclaimer: Don't own Kingdom Hearts stuff, and don't own this amazing song. Capische? (By the way, is that how you spell that? Kapeesh? Capische? It confuses me.)

XxXxX

It rarely rains during the summer on Destiny Islands. During any other season, one was almost guaranteed a good soaking every couple of weeks or so, especially on the mainland, but the island summers somehow always managed to keep sunny, bright and dry.

Kairi tried to keep this in mind as she stared at the soft gray skies. It looked as though someone had stretched several layers of gauze over the sky so that only the faintest bit of light filtered through. Out towards the mainland, it was almost clear, but darker clouds were rolling in from the open sea. A chilly breeze blew off the waves.

No rain had started yet, but it definitely looked like it would. Kairi was determined to stay out as long as she could, though. Storms were a rarity, as was stated before, so she was determined to make the most of this one. She sat on the low-hanging paopu tree on the small spit of land connected to the main island by a wood plank bridge, and smiled quietly to herself, recalling the last time a storm had rolled in.

During the time of which I speak
It was hard to turn the other cheek
To the blows of insecurity

It had been a long day, waning towards nightfall. The three of them had by some miracle gotten permission from their parents to have their very first camp-out on the island (they couldn't have been more than nine or ten at the time).

As Kairi recalled, they were set up in the secret cave, campfire and everything. Riku had been telling a good horror story to the other two. Right in the middle of a very climactic moment, a huge thunderclap went off. All three of them had screamed their little lungs out and grabbed each other in a fearful huddle. As the thunder's echoes died out, they all looked at each other and laughed nervously. Sora bounded off to check what was going on outside. Riku and Kairi had been left in the middle of the cave, still awkwardly close. They quickly let go of each other and averted their eyes, blushing.

Before either said anything, Sora came back from the mouth of the cave, water dripping from the ends of his hair. "Guys," he'd said, with a look of wonder on his face, "it's raining."

Feeding the cancer of my intellect
The blood of love, soon neglected
Lay dying in the strength of its impurity

How much had changed since then? Sure, even coming back after almost two years, they still tried to act as though nothing was different, but the tension was there. Sora would spend nearly all his waking hours near Kairi, as if he was afraid that she'd disappear again. Riku understood, and did his best to act like it didn't bother him in the slightest. And Kairi was somewhere in the middle...not knowing how to feel or what to think.

Meanwhile our friends we thought were so together
They've all gone and left each other
In search of fairer weather

A large drop fell on her nose, and Kairi flinched, startled. The gray skies had darkened a bit, but they hadn't opened on her yet, but they looked like they should. The clouds almost seemed uncertain: hesitant, even.

Strange that she was feeling pretty much the same way.

And we sit here in our storm and drink a toast
To the slim chance of love's recovery

After all, it wasn't as if she didn't like Sora a lot. That was almost the problem itself. He was such a great friend, and so understanding, that...she didn't know if she wanted that to change. She'd grown accustomed to knowing that he'd always be there for her, a phone call or short walk away. Maybe her starry-eyed self of about a year and a half ago would be perplexed at her own ambivalent feelings, but Kairi was older now, and wiser to the ways of the world. Matches were seldom made in heaven. Who's to say that taking their relationship to the next level wouldn't hurt it, or damage their perceptions of each other?

What if Sora found out that she liked him...just liked him?

There I am in younger days, star gazing
Painting picture perfect maps
Of how my life and love would be

And then...there was Riku. He was another story entirely. Kairi was almost afraid to consider her feelings towards him. Before the island's initial destruction, before the raft, before they had been torn apart and scattered across the worlds, Kairi had always seen Riku as an older brother, a protector. He'd always been there for Sora and her, through the light and dark times...especially the dark times, more recently.

She'd been shocked, horrified, angered, certainly, when she'd been told about Riku's misguided turn to the dark. It had felt like the safe bubble around her and the people she loved had suddenly and without warning, just...popped.

Not counting the unmarked paths of misdirection
My compass, faith in loves perfection
I missed ten million miles of road I should have seen

The most surprising thing, though, was that even through the shock, anger, and pity she'd felt, there was a small undercurrent of...guilt. That was silly, though; how was it her fault? It was just a totally illogical way to feel...

Yet, after all, Riku'd only done what he had thought was best for her at the time, so if she hadn't needed saving in the first place, none of that would have happened. If she had been stronger, or faster, or hadn't gone into the secret place that fateful night and instead gone for help... How much longer could she afford to play the damsel in distress?

Meanwhile our friends we thought were so together
Left each other one by one on the road to fairer weather
And we sit here in our storm and drink a toast
To the slim chance of loves recovery

She could feel moisture on her cheeks, and told herself it was just the rain. She couldn't be crying. There was nothing to cry about! So what if she was having misgivings about her relationship with Sora? So what if she was feeling cold and alone right now, and the person she'd most like to sit with and talk to and be comforted by was also the one person who haunted most of her waking thoughts—and all of her sleeping ones as well? So what if...if... (She had to admit it to herself) she was falling in love with Riku?

She could deal. She had no other choice.

Rain soaked and voice choked
Like silent screaming in a dream
I search for our absolute distinction

"Suck it up," Kairi told herself angrily, swiping a hand across her face. "You're a big girl now. You've got to deal with your own life."

Not content to bow and bend
To the whims of culture that swoop like vultures
Eating us away, eating us away
Eating us away to our extinction

Speaking of which, Kairi wasn't sure what qualified as her "own life" anymore. Ever since she and Sora had met Roxas and Naminé, there always seemed to be this... pressure to keep the hasty, naïve promise she had made to Naminé that she and Sora would be together so that Naminé and Roxas could be together. How was that fair to Kairi and Sora themselves? Was it right to pretend to want that so Naminé could have what she wanted? Was it fair to lie to Sora, her best friend?

Oh how I wish I were a trinity
So if I lost a part of me,
I'd still have two of the same to live

No, Kairi decided, it was not. It wasn't fair to herself that she had to live her life for someone else. It wasn't fair to Sora, who deserved the truth.

It definitely wasn't fair to Riku, to whom she was denying the chance for a relationship from the outset, whether he wanted one or not.

"Kairi!" someone called, breaking into her thoughts. She turned to see Riku across the bridge, waving and yelling to her. "The storm's blowing in—it's supposed to hit any minute! What are you doing out here?" Kairi looked up to where he was pointing. Without her noticing, the sky had turned nearly black, and the wind was picking up. Raindrops were coming more often now.

"I was just thinking," Kairi called back, grinning mischievously as he walked over to her. "What are you doing out here? You didn't come all the way out from the mainland to fetch little old me, I'm assuming."

'That's for me to know and you to find out," Riku shot back, smirking. He jumped up onto the trunk next to her. "Best seats in the house, huh?"

"The very best," Kairi said, leaning into him.

But nobody gets a lifetime rehearsal
As specks of dust, we're universal
To let this love survive would be the greatest gift that we could give

Riku looked down at her in mild surprise, but didn't say anything. Kairi was glad that he'd decided not to ruin the moment. After a minute, Riku broke the silence, saying, "We should head back. The waves don't look good." Kairi, in response, slid down from the tree trunk.

They started to walk back, but Riku abruptly stopped. "All right, you can't fool me. What was that about?"

"What was what about?" Kairi asked innocently.

"You know," Riku responded. "That."

Kairi looked up into his eyes. (When did he get so tall, anyway?) It was the perfect moment. This was the moment of truth; time to bite the bullet, grit her teeth and get it over and done with. She opened her mouth—

—And was interrupted by a huge clap of thunder. They both started, and looked up at the same time.

"Oh, snap," Riku said.

The skies opened on them.

Tell all the friends who think they're so together
That these are ghosts and mirages
All these thoughts of fair weather

Riku put his arm around Kairi's shoulders and drew her close, shielding her as best he could from the downpour. Kairi shivered. She hadn't realized how cold it had gotten.

They walked across the wood bridge to the beach shack. Kairi leaned in close to Riku's body again, trying to get as warm (and as close) as possible. Riku glanced down, his wet hair spilling over his shoulders like quicksilver, but this time simply smiled quietly and accepted the gesture just as it was... like he accepted her. They didn't need to say anything more.

Outside, the rain poured down.

Inside, for a few hours... the world was perfect.

And though it's storming out, I feel safe within the arms
Of love's discovery.

A/N: Grr... The ruler feature on the document manager is acting up. I had to use my usual scene-separator X's. I have a couple more of these R/K songfics planned. If I get over five, I may choose to combine them all into an anthology for easy access. Read and review!

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